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BR  1725  .C55  H3  1850 
Hamilton,  James,  1814-1867 
A  memoir  of  Lady  Colquhoun 


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A    MEMOIR 


LADI    COLQUHOUN 


BY 


JAMES  HAMILTON,   D.D. 

AUTHOR  or  "life  in  earnest,"  "mount  of  olives,"  "harp  on 

THE    WILLOWS,"   "THANKFULNESS,"   "LIFE    OF    HALL," 
AND   "the    happy   HOME." 


NEW   YORK: 

ROBERT    CARTER    &    BROTHERS, 

No.   285    BROAUVVAY, 

1850. 


PREFACE. 


When  the  Editor  was  requested  to  compile  this 
Memoir,  he  could  not  forget  his  scanty  leisure,  and 
his  hmited  acquaintance  with  Lady  Colquhoun.  But 
the  invitation  of  her  family,  the  belief  that  a  near  rel- 
ative of  his  own,  now  no  more,  would  have  responded 
to  it  with  all  the  eagerness  of  his  fervent  nature,  and 
the  hope  that  such  a  narrative  might  be  blessed  to 
the  reproduction  of  similar  characters,  at  length  in- 
duced him  to  make  the  attempt. 

In  the  prosecution  of  his  undertaking,  the  Compiler 
has  felt  both  the  lack  and  the  excess  of  materials. 
To  the  affectionate  diligence  of  a  family  who  cannot 
revere  too  devotedly  the  memory  of  such  a  parent, 
and  who  have  kindly  put  at  his  disposal  all  Remains 
and  Recollections  hkely  to  illustrate  her  history,  he  is 
indebted  for  documents  which  might  easily  expand 
this  memorial  fourfold.  On  the  other  hand,  many 
most  valuable  portions  of  her  Ladyship's  correspond- 


IV  PREFACE. 

ence  are  gone  beyond  recall.  One  series  of  her  let- 
ters perished  in  a  conflagration  ;  another  was  lost  at 
sea ;  and  many  have  disappeared  as  they  passed  into 
hands  less  careful  than  theirs  who  first  received  them. 
And,  precious  as  is  her  Diary,  having  been  kept  for 
uses  entirely  personal,  it  contains  few  singular  or  ex- 
trinsic incidents.  The  difficulty  of  selection  has  been 
great.  Many  references  are  omitted  which  would 
have  been  peculiarly  gratifying  to  relatives  and 
friends ;  and  many  passages,  in  themselves  so  edify- 
ing, that  their  suppression  caused  a  pang  at  the  mo- 
ment, and  still  leaves  a  misgiving.  But,  in  a  printed 
book,  as  in  a  public  address,  the  writer  well  knows 
that  the  most  venial  fault  is  bre^^ty ;  and  his  only 
gi'ief  will  be,  if,  in  trying  to  earn  that  pleasant  cen- 
sure, he  has  failed  to  do  justice  to  one  whose  rare  ex- 
cellence merited  a  copious  record  and  a  more  skilful 
biographer. 

London,  August  10,  1849. 


CONTENTS, 


CHAPTER  I. 

FAGB 

Sir  John  Sinclair — Tliurso  Castle — Lady  Janet  Sinclair 
— Nurse  Morris — Stoke  Newington — The  Sisters — 
Dr.  Walter  Buchanan,  and  Wilberforce's  "Practical 
VieV    .......      7 

CHAPTER  II. 

Rossdhu  and  Loch  Lomond — Sir  James  Colquhoun — Dr. 
Stuart,  of  Luss — Aristocratic  Society  in  Scotland  long 
ago — Commencement  of  the  Diary — A  Mother's  Leg- 
acy       ....... 


28 


CHAPTER  in. 

Death  of  Mss  Hannah  Sinclair — Luss  and  Arrochar 
Bible  Society— The  Poor  of  Scotland  Thirty  Years 
ago — Nelly — "  Despair  and  Hope" — BeU  Macintyre — 
Tract  Distribution— The  School  of  Industry— The  Sab- 
bach  School  — "Kirkings"— The  Diary— Dr.  Alex. 
Stewart— Mr.  Legh  Richmond— Dr.  Chalmers— Miss 
Jane  FarreU 11 


VI  CONTENTS. 

CHAPTER  IV. 

PAGE 

Publications — "Impressions  of  the  Heart" — Dr.  Colqu- 
houn,  of  Leith — Dr.  Hamilton,  of  Strathblane— Dr. 
Malan — A  Daughter's  Marriage — First  Visit  to  Brigh- 
ton— The  Pavilion  and  the  Sabbath — "Be  not  far  off; 
for  Grief  is  near" — The  Ilhiess  and  Death  of  Sir  John 
Sinclair  and  Sir  James  Colquhoun        .  .  .143 

CHAPTER  V. 

"Thy  Maker  is  thy  Husband" — Class  for  grown-up  Girls 
— Lady  Colquhoun's  Talent  in  Expounding  Scripture 
— Visits  to  Suffolk — Labors  amongst  the  Cottagers  of 
Stutton  and  the  Inhabitants  of  Thistle-street — Let- 
ters to  Miss  S.— Sunday  Trains  .  .  .200 

CHAPTER  VI. 

The  Disruption— The  Free  Church  at  Luss — Societies — 
Education  in  India — Irish  Mission — Gaehc  Schools — 
Making  a  Friend  of  the  Unrighteous  Mammon — Piety 
at  Home — Servants — Diary  concluded — Death  of  her 
Daughter-in-law  and  Lady  Sinclair      .  .  .  233 

CHAPTER  VIL 

Sunset  in  Autumn — Waiting  for  Spring  .  ,  .  268 


CHAPTER   I. 


O   SATISFY  US   EAKLY  AVITH   THY   MERCY;  THAT  "W^E   MAY 
REJOICE  AND  BE  GLAD  ALL  OUR  DAYS. PSALM  XC.  14. 


I  do  remember  them,  their  pleasant  brows 
So  mark'd  with  pure  affections,  and  the  glance 
Of  their  raild  eyes,  when,  in  the  house  of  God, 
They  gather'd  up  the  manna  that  did  fall 
Like  dew  aiound, 

MRS.    SIGOURNKY. 


To  few  of  her  sons  is  Scotland  more  indebted 
than  to  the  late  Sir  John  Sinclair,  of  Ulbster. 
Entering  into  active  life  at  an  early  age,  for 
sixty  busy  years  he  was  constantly  spending  m 
the  service  of  his  neighbors  and  his  country 
excellent  talents  and  a  good  estate.  Whilst 
yet  a  lad  at  college  he  gave  earnest  of  that 
passion  for  improvement,  and  that  dauntless 
enterprise,  which  distinguished  him  through 
hfe.    Among  its  many  wants,  his  native  Caith- 


O  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

ness  wanted  roads,  and  it  was  in  vain  that  Mr. 
Sinclair  urged  his  brother  landowners  to  supply 
the  deficiency.  There  was  a  steep  hill,  called 
Ben  Cheilt,  which  ran  right  through  the  county, 
and  as  an  objection  to  the  turnpike,  at  once 
witty  and  fatal,  it  was  always  asked,  "  When 
will  you  show  us  a  road  over  Ben  Cheilt?" 
But  one  summer  morning,  having  beforehand 
provided  great  store  of  implements,  the  young 
laird  mustered  on  the  spot  1200  laborers,  and 
ere  nightfall  a  good  carriage-way  was  thrown 
over  this  terrible  mountain.  And  much  of  his 
subsequent  career  was  the  same  exploit  re- 
peated. In  every  undertaking  he  laiew  that 
he  must  look  for  a  Ben  Cheilt,— a  Hill  Diffi- 
culty, on  which  all  the  timid  and  all  the  lazy 
would  take  their  stand  ;  and  he  always  sought 
to  surmount  it  by  some  brilliant  and  conclusive 
operation.  And  by  dint  of  his  own  heroic 
exertions,  and  by  the  aid  of  those  friends  whom 
his  reputation  and  his  systematic  obligingness 
were  perpetually  acquiiing,  he  accomphshed 
many  works  of  enormous  labor  and  of  more 
than  national  utility.  Encouraged  by  the 
success  of  his  schemes  for  improving  the  hus- 
bandry of  his  own  ungenial  realms,  he  founded 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN.  9 

that  Board  of  Agriculture  which  has  intro- 
duced a  new  era  in  the  tillage  of  the  empire, 
whilst  his  untiring  labors  have  left  his  name 
associated  with  the  productive  fisheries  and 
thriving  sheep-farms  of  Scotland.  The  list  of 
his  publications  fills  thirty  pages  of  print ;  and 
if  the  themes  be  too  various,  and  if  fresh  pro- 
jects succeed  one  another  too  rapidly,  they 
show  the  industry  of  the  student  who  could 
impart  information  on  subjects  so  diverse,  and 
the  benevolence  of  the  statesman  whose  only 
concern  was  to  make  other  people  rich  and 
contented.  His  "Statistical  Account  of  Scot- 
land"* is  a  trophy  of  his  unconquerable  energy 
and  unwearied  good-humor.  It  was  a  task  for 
which,  saving  the  engineer  of  Ben  Cheilt,  few 
would  have  had  faith  or  perseverance  suffi- 
cient. In  order  to  compile  it,  he  required 
answers  to  one  hundred  and  sixty  queries  from 
nearly  a  thousand  ministers.  To  many  of  his 
correspondents,  such  topics  were  strange  or 
distasteful,  and  all  of  them  encountered  diffi- 
culties in  the  shyness,  and  sometimes  in  the 
superstition,  of  their  natural  informants.  Ten- 
ants would  not  tell  the  produce  of  their  farms 
*  In  twenty-one  volumes,  octavo. 


10  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

for  fear  that  their  rents  should  be  raised,  and 
Highland  shepherds  would  not  count  their 
flocks,  lest  their  vain  curiosity  should  entail  a 
judgment  on  the  fleecy  people.  But,  by  a 
judicious  admixture  of  coaxing  and  objurga- 
tion, the  sanguine  Baronet  quickened  the  dili- 
gence of  the  ministers,  and  by  patience  and 
adroitness,  the  ministers  ehcited  the  essential 
facts  from  their  over-cautious  parishioners. 
One  laid  aside  his  Cicero  and  another  his 
"PoU  Synopsis"  till  he  should  complete  his 
census  of  pigs,  poultry,  and  milch-kine.  Pro- 
fessor Cooper  grew  archaeological  over  the 
"Auld  Wives'  Lift"  and  Dr.  Gibb  waxed 
curious  in  acoustics  :*  in  stately  periods,  worthy 
of  a  Scottish  Johnson,  Mr.  Sheriff  told  how 
many  pounds  of  clover,  and  how  many  firlots 
of  rye-grass  were  sown,  in  order  to  procure  a 
hundred  stones  of  hay ;  whilst  the  melhfluous 
cadence  of  Dr.  Mackinla}^  lent  new  charms  to 

*  Witness  the  clever  and  well-bred  echo  at  Mugdock  Castle : 
"  Opposite  to  this  tower  is  heard  a  very  extraordinary  echo. 
It  repeats  any  sentence  of  six  syllables,  in  the  exact  tone, 
and  with  the  very  accent,  in  which  it  is  uttered;  waiting 
deliberately  till  the  sentence  is  finished  before  it  begins." — 
Stat.  Acct.  xviii.  579. 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ,UHOUN.  11 

printed  calicoes,  duffles,  serges,  and  mancoes, 
and  all  fabrics  which  owed  their  glory  to 
Kilmarnock  and  to  "creelman's  composition." 
When  the  mighty  work  was  completed,  no 
country  possessed  a  survey  of  its  internal  re- 
sources so  comprehensive,  or  local  histories  so 
minute,  as  were  contained  in  its  elaborate 
pages.  It  greatly  helped  to  create  the  science 
of  statistics,  and  to  the  Scottish  antiquarian  it 
is  a  record  of  ever-growing  value. — When  to 
such  literary  and  economic  toils,  we  add  that 
in  mellow  age  he  could  reckon  two  hundred 
of  his  countrymen  who  owed  their  worldly 
advancement  to  his  friendly  offices,  and  that 
he  numbered  among  his  friends  and  corres- 
pondents half  the  renowned  names  of  Europe, 
we  shall  convey  some  idea  of  his  wide  ac- 
quaintance with  his  contemporaries,  as  w^ell  as 
a  specimen  of  his  ceaseless  and  kind-hearted 
activity.* 

When  the  heir  of  Ulbster  was  still  young,  full 

*  For  interesting  memorials  of  Sir  John  Sinclair  we  are 
indebted  to  the  filial  affection  of  both  a  son  and  a  daughter. 
See  Miss  Catherme  Sinclair's  "  Shetland  and  the  Shetland- 
ers ;"  and  "  Memoirs  of  the  late  Right  Honorable  Sir  John 
Sinclair,  Bart"  by  Archdeacon  Sinclair. 


12  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

of  the  chivalry  which  ihrough  his  stiong-mincled 
mother.  Lady  Janet,*  he  had  derived  from  the 
ancient  house  of  Sutherland,  and  exulting  in 
all  the  possibilities  of  an  existence  which  he 
meant  to  fill  with  noble  deeds,  at  the  residence 
of  Mr.  Maitland,  at  Stoke  Newington,  he  saw 
a  young  lady,  whose  rare  attractions  drew  many 
admirers  round  her.  Of  these  none  could  be 
more  ardent  than  Mr.  Sinclair,  and  he  soon 
won  the  affections  of  a  congenial  mind.  But 
Miss  Maitland  was  an  only  child  and  an  heir- 
ess, and  her  mother  grudged  that  her  future 
liome  should  be  so  far  away.  However,  the 
same  love  which  would  fain  have  kept  her 
daughter  near  her,  could  not  long  gainsay  that 
daughter's  deliberate  choice ;  and  ere  long  the 
sanction  of  either  parent  gave  to  the  happy 
suitor  his  lovely  bride.  Nine  years  passed  pros- 
perously.    Mr.  Sinclair  was  in  Parliament ;  his 

*  Lady  Janet  was  daughter  of  William  Lord  Strathnaver, 
■who,  had  he  sm-vived  his  father,  would  have  been  seven- 
teenth Earl  of  Sutherland.  Her  sister,  Lady  Helen  Suther- 
land, married  Su"  James  Colqulioun,  of  Luss,  grandfather  of 
that  Sh  James  who  became  the  husband  of  Miss  Janet  Sin- 
clair.    Consequently,  Lady  Colqulioun  and  her  husband  were 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  13 

knowledge  of  finance  made  him  an  authority 
on  that  great  question  of  the  day,  and  gained 
him  tlie  special  favor  of  the  Premier.  He  had 
received  the  promise  of  a  Baronetcy,*  and  was 
daily  rising  into  higher  political  influence  and 
public  celebrity,  when  his  flattering  prospects 
were  shrouded  in  sudden  gloom  by  the  removal 
of  his  much-loved  partner.  Along  with  the 
memory  of  her  feminine  graces  and  endearing 
gentleness,  Mrs.  Sinclair  left  her  representatives 
in  two  little  girls,  almost  too  young  to  miss  her, 
but  still  so  like  her,  that,  in  the  daughters,  there 
was  a  promise  that  the  mother  would  appear 
again.  Hannah,  the  oldest,  was  five  years  of 
age,  and  Janet,  of  whom  we  are  now  to  write, 
was  only  four.  She  was  born  in  London  on 
the  17th  of  April,  1781,  and  during  her  infancy 
her  parents  resided  at  Westminster  and  White- 
hall. 

The  first  home  of  these  motherless  children 
was  their  ancestral  seat,  Thurso  Castle.  That 
stormy  mansion  looked  more  like  a  nursery  for 

*  After  his  wife's  death,  as  Mr.  Smclair  had  no  son,  by  a 
very  unusual  concession  to  the  feelings  of  his  friend,  Mr.  Pitt 
made  out  the  patent  of  Baronetcy  in  favor  of  Su-  John,  with 
remainder  to  liis  daughters  and  their  heirs  male. 

2 


14  LIFE    OP    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

a  lord  of  the  isles,  or  like,  what  it  was  at  first, 
the  ocean-nest  of  the  amphibious  Caithness 
earls,  than  a  retreat  for  tender  orphans,  cradled 
beneath  a  southern  sun.  But  in  that  grim  old 
castle  the  Orphans'  Guardian  had  provided 
for  them  all  but  a  mother's  care.  Not  only 
was  it  the  frequent  resort  of  their  fond  surviv- 
ing parent,  but  it  was  the  permanent  abode  of 
their  paternal  grandmother,  a  Scottish  gentle- 
woman of  the  olden  school,  shrewd,  energetic, 
notable,  proud  of  her  ancient  lineage,  and,  as 
became  the  descendant  of  that  venerable  peer 
who  first  affixed  his  tremulous  autograph  to 
Scotland's  Covenant,  a  firm  adherent  to  the 
Presbyterian  polity ;  one  who  looked  w^ell  to 
the  ways  of  her  household,  and  indited  horta- 
tory epistles  to  youthful  clergymen  ;  but  also 
one  who,  amidst  all  the  strictness  of  a  mana- 
ger, and  all  the  stateliness  of  a  high-born 
dame,  carried  about  that  constitutional  kindli- 
ness, and  those  profound  affections,  which — 
like  a  deep  well  fenced  with  rustic  masonry — ■ 
the  old  mothers  of  Scotland  sometimes  hid 
within  a  dry  or  stoic  manner.  Lady  Janet 
now  lived  for  the  daughters  of  her  son,  and 
though  perhaps   imperfectly  acquainted  with 


LIFE    OP    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  15 

the  distinguishing  truths  of  the  Gospel,  it  was 
her  anxiety  to  bring  up  her  youthful  charge 
religiously.  She  constantly  took  them  to  the 
parish  church,  and  then  examined  them  on 
the  sermons  they  had  heard,  and  required 
them  every  Sabbath  to  repeat  to  her  a  Psalm 
and  the  Shorter  Catechism.  At  the  Castle  also 
resided  their  father's  sister,  a  kind  lady,  who, 
throughout  her  long  life,  never  ceased  to  be 
much  loved  by  her  nieces.*  And  there,  too,  so- 
journed a  judicious  and  affectionate  servant — 
the  English  nurse,  Morris — to  whose  warm- 
hearted counsels  and  simple  Bible  lessons  her 
youthful  charge  were  at  that  period  more  in- 
debted than  to  any  human  influence.  Herself 
a  guileless  and  God-fearing  Christian,  this 
faithful  attendant  imbued  the  minds  of  her 
young  mistresses  with  much  of  her  own  truth- 
fulness and  reverence  for  sacred  things.  One 
Sabbath  Miss  Jessie  came  in  with  a  lapful  of 
live  shell-fish,  which  she  had  gathered  on  the 
shore  at  a  great  distance  from  the  Castle.  "  I 
think,  my  dear,"  said  Morris,  "  you  should  not 

*  She  afterwards  became  !Mi-3.  Baillie,  by  her  marriage  to 
Lord  Polkemmet,  one  of  the  Senators  of  the  College  of 
Justice. 


16  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

have  gathered  them  on  the  Sabbath-day  ;  you 
had  better  put  them  again  where  you  got  them." 
Miss  Jessie  disappeared,  and  was  late  of  return- 
ing. She  had  scrambled  back  the  whole  way 
along  that  rocky  coast,  till  she  came  as  nearly 
as  she  could  judge  to  the  spot  where  she  had 
found  the  periw  inkles,  and  then  put  them  care- 
fully back  again.  To  her  latest  day  she  re- 
tained the  simplicity  and  ingenuousness,  as 
w^ell  as  the  respect  for  the  Sabbath,  which  she 
learned  thus  early ;  and  to  her  latest  day, 
Nurse  Morris  experienced  the  gratitude  of  the 
Misses  Sinclair,  who  provided  her  with  an 
ample  annuity,  and  were  careful  that  in  health, 
as  in  sickness,  she  should  w^ant  no  comfort 
which  money  could  procure. 

From  Thurso  Castle  it  was  a  grand  sight  to 
view  the  Pentland  Frith  in  its  winter's  fury — 
and  the  sisters  often  viewed  it.  On  the  short 
December  days — in  Caithness  extremely  short 
• — they  would  stand  and  watch  as  one  long  wave 
after  another  swung  home,  and  exploded  be- 
neath them  ;  till  at  last  some  monster  billow, 
with  skirmishers  streaming  before  him,  rolled 
up  to  the  charge,  and  as  he  burst  on  tlie  base- 
ment, the  windows  were  washed   with  brine, 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  17 

and  the  old  tower  shook  like  a  lighthouse.  To 
gaze  on  that  stormy  ocean,  and  listen  to  its 
noisy  anthem,  were  great  lessons ;  and  even  in 
these  our  days  of  infant  training,  it  might  be 
well  if  more  provision  were  made  for  such  book- 
less education,  and  the  young  mind  were  per- 
mitted to  commune  more  freely  with  nature  in 
her  wild  and  gentle  moods.  The  subject  of 
this  memoir  often  reverted  to  the  solemn  and 
awe-struck  emotions  with  which  she  used  to 
survey  the  many  waves  of  that  mighty  sea. 
To  her  it  lived.  In  its  gambols  it  was  a  famil- 
iar and  a  play-fellow;  in  its  turmoil  it  was  a 
preacher  of  Jehovah's  majesty ;  and  when  for- 
mal instructions  had  nearly  faded  from  remem- 
brance, she  was  still  conscious  of  lofty  thoughts, 
and  grave  impressions,  derived  from  this  august 
but  kindly  tutor. 

From  Thurso  Castle  Lady  Janet  brought 
her  grand-daughters  to  Edinburgh.  There,  for 
three  years  they  dwelt  in  the  ancient  Canon- 
gate,  whose  quaint  houses  were  still  occupied 
by  such  of  the  aristocracy  as  had  not  migrated 
to  the  New  Town  ;  and  then,  to  complete  their 
education,  they  were  sent  to  the  school  at  Stoke 
Newington,  where  their  own  mother  had  spent 
2* 


18  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

her  youthful  days.  Mrs.  Crisp,  by  whom  this 
school  was  conducted,  received  the  children  of 
her  former  pupil  with  a  very  warm  affection, 
and,  in  her  well-ordered  establishment,  the 
business  of  learning  went  briskly  forward.  The 
different  branches  were  taught  by  the  best 
teachers ;  the  Misses  Sinclair  enjoyed  good 
health,  and  were  endowed  with  excellent  abili- 
ties ;  they  had  already  acquired  the  most  essen- 
tial elements  of  knowledge  before  coming  to 
London,  and  they  had  every  incentive  to  study 
which  the  affection  of  their  governess  and  the 
good-will  of  their  companions  could  supply. 
Accordingly,  they  made  signal  proficiency,  and 
w^ien,  at  the  respective  ages  of  fifteen  and  six- 
teen, they  returned  to  Edinburgh,  in  person  and 
acquirements  advanced  beyond  their  years,  they 
found  a  ready  welcome  into  that  brilhant  society 
to  which  their  birth  was  a  passport,  and  into 
which  their  kind  mother-in-law,  Lady  Sinclair,* 
rejoiced  to  introduce  them. 


*  The  second  wife  of  Sir  John  Sinclair  was  the  only  daugh- 
ter of  Lord  Macdonald.  She  was  not  more  eminent  for  beauty 
and  accomplishments,  than  for  benevolence  and  sweetness  of 
disposition.  The  attachment  of  the  Misses  Sinclair  towards 
her  was  warm  and  well  deserved,  for  she  was  always  a  kind 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLGIUHOUN.  19 

However,  it  was  the  great  happiness  of  the 
sisters  that  even  they  had  no  love  of  fashion 
and  no  turn  for  gaiety.  And  it  was  their  otlier 
great  happiness  that  they  had  an  ardent  love 
for  one  another.  Hannah  was  a  student.  Even 
during  her  childish  days  at  Thurso,  she  had 
nearly  as  many  friends  as  there  were  books  in 
her  father's  library.  She  knew  the  haunt  of 
each,  and  climbing  on  a  chair  got  hold  of  her 
favorite  poet  or  divine,  and  sat  demurely  read- 
ing whilst  the  summer  tempted  her  to  play. 
To  her  it  was  the  great  event,  not  when  the 
carrier  brought  a  package  of  new  toys,  but  a 
parcel  of  new  volumes ;  and  when  ministers 
and  learned  people  visited  the  Castle,  she  posed 
them  with  hard  questions.  At  school  the  same 
tendency  bewrayed  itself.  Her  turn  was  still 
for  thought  and  knowledge.  She  was  fond  of 
languages ;  she  was  an  adept  in  grammar, 
history,  geography,  arithmetic ;  she  could  cal- 
culate an  eclipse,  or  analyze  "Reid's  Inquiry." 
And,  as  might  be  expected,  she  was  sedate  and 
speculative,  and  often  silent.  From  extreme 
modesty,  reserved,  she  was  still  more  self-con- 
mother  and  a  faithful  friend  to  them.  She  survived  her  hus- 
band ten  years,  and  died  in  IS-iS. 


20  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

tallied,  because  amongst  companions  of  her 
own  sex  she  seldom  found  much  sympathy  in 
her  intellectual  pursuits.  But  Jessie  was  more 
hvely.  Dutiful  and  diligent,  and  considerate 
of  each  one's  feelings,  she  was  full  of  merry  life 
and  social  glee.  There  was  health  in  her 
nimble  step  and  a  prepossession  in  her  fair  and 
open  features,  and  a  peculiar  charm  in  her 
tuneful  voice.  To  her  sister's  turn  for  music 
she  added  a  remarkable  command  of  the  pencil ; 
and  whilst  her  sister  pored  over  problems  and 
deep  authors,  Jessie  read  for  information.  Her 
sister  pondered  and  reasoned,  and  carried  with 
her  a  mind  full  of  queries  and  surmises ;  but 
Jessie  seemed  to  have  an  innate  affinity  for 
things  "honest,  lovely,  and  of  good  report,"  al- 
most akin  to  Christian  faith.  At  first  sight 
contrasts,  their  characters  were  really  the  com- 
plement of  one  another.  Their  diversity  in- 
creased their  fondness,  and  enabled  the  one  to 
supply  what  the  other  lacked.  For  her  erudite 
and  thoughtful  sister  the  younger  felt  an  admir- 
ing and  up-looking  deference  ;  whilst  the  hmpid 
perceptions  and  true  instincts  of  that  younger 
mind  often  proved  lights  in  dark  places  to  the 
more  abstract  inquirer. 


LIFE    OP    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  21 

At  that  period  Dr.  Walter  Buchanan  was 
one  of  the  ministers  of  Canongate.  His  warm 
and  affectionate  nature  had  been  cast  in  the 
mould  of  the  Gospel,  and  as  it  shone  from  his 
happy  countenance  and  breathed  in  his  gra- 
cious   words,    holiness    was    very   beautiful.* 

*  Dr.  Walter  Buchanan  was  born  in  1755.  After  he  was 
licensed  he  received  an  invitation  to  become  the  minister  of 
the  Scotch  Church  at  Rotterdam,  and  was  also  called  to  the 
chapel  of  South  Leith,  of  whicli  Dr.  Colquhoun  was  for  so 
many  years  the  eminent  pastor.  But  instead  of  either 
charge  he  accepted  the  office  of  assistant  to  Mr.  Randall,  of 
Stirling,  whom  he  succeeded  in  1780.  In  1789  he  was 
translated  to  the  collegiate  Church  and  parish  of  Canongate, 
where  he  remained  until  his  death  in  1832.  He  was  a  beau- 
tiful specimen  of  Christian  urbanity  and  warm-heartedness, 
and  his  house  was  the  natural  resort  of  the  pious  Churchmen 
and  Dissenters  who  in  those  days, — the  days  of  Simeon, 
Rowland  Hill,  and  George  Bm-der, — came  to  Edinburgh,  and 
who,  until  the  year  1799,  were  allowed  to  occupy  indiscrimi- 
nately the  pulpits  of  the  Scottish  Establishment.  Along 
with  Dr.  Davidson  he  was  noted  for  his  Uberal  encourage- 
ment of  pious  students  of  Theology,  and  by  the  books  which 
he  lent  them,  the  friendly  advice  which  he  gave  them,  and 
the  many  substantial  services  wliich  he  rendered  them,  find- 
ing a  tutorship  for  one,  and  the  office  of  schoolmaster  or 
assistant  minister  for  another,  and  frequently  giving  goodly 
sums  to  those  in  straitened  circumstances,  he  became  a  gen- 
eral patron  to  all  probationers  of  Evangelical  sentiments  in 


22  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

The  sisters  looked  at  him  with  reverence. 
They  had  been  told  a  great  deal  about  re- 
ligion, and  they  thought  of  it  as  something 
strict  and  precise;  but  they  had  never  met 
anything  so  fascinating  as  they  saw  in  their 
saintly  pastor.  They  were  quite  arrested. 
Even  amidst  gay  parties  and  volatile  com- 
panions there  followed  them  many  a  remin- 
iscence of  those  fervent  intercessions  and  per- 
suasive counsels  to  which  they  had  hearkened 
on  the  previous  Sabbath.  At  last  one  day 
Miss  Sinclair  said  to  her  sister,  "  If  to  obtain 
eternal  life,  we  have  only  to  practise  goodness ; 
if  we  have  only  to  do  what  is  right  in  the  sight 

Edinburgh.  For  many  years  he  edited  a  periodical  Tvhich 
supphed  the  godly  faniihes  in  Scotland  with  missionary  in- 
telligence and  instructive  Sabbath-reading, — "  The  Rehgious 
Monitor."  With  that  constancy  wliich  was  one  of  her  love- 
liest characteristics,  Lady  Colquhoun  never  abated  for  one 
hour  in  the  grateful  and  venerating  affection  with  wlaich  she 
regarded  this  eartlily  guide  of  her  youth ;  and  when,  long 
afterwards,  her  own  daughter  was  married,  she  felt  it  a  hal- 
lowing and  auspicious  circumstance  that  the  rite  was  solem- 
nized by  her  own  spiritual  father.  And  in  liis  widow,  who 
sui'vived  for  fifteen  years,  she  fomid  one  of  her  most  esteem- 
ed and  congenial  friends.  The  house  of  Mrs.  Buchanan  was 
the  last  to  which  Lady  C.  paid  a  visit. 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN.  23 

of  God  and  avoid  what  is  evil,  I  am  sure  it 
would  be  folly  not  to  make  the  attempt." 
And  the  proposal  was  made  to  one  who  had 
already  been  pondering  the  matter  in  her  own 
mind,  and  who  was  beginning  to  be  much  im- 
pressed with  the  value  of  her  soul  and  the  un- 
certainty of  life.  The  two  resolved  to  become 
religious.  They  often  retired  and  read  the 
Bible  together,  and  became  very  exact  in  de- 
votional exercises.  But  still  they  were  not 
satisfied.  They  saw  that  their  pastor  and 
Christians  like  him,  "  had  bread  to  eat  which 
they  knew  not  of,"  and  they  longed  for  this 
hidden  manna.  At  this  time  they  found  on 
their  father's  table  a  Theological  Treatise, 
newly  published  and  inscribed,  "  From  the  au- 
thor." It  was  "  A  Practical  View  of  the  Re- 
ligious System  of  Professed  Christians  in  the 
Higher  and  Middle  Classes,  by  William  Wil- 
berforce,  M.P."  It  seemed  the  very  book  they 
wanted.  They  carried  it  oflf  to  their  own 
apartments  and  perused  it  with  avidity.  They 
could  easily  recognize  in  it  the  same  system 
of  Evangelical  doctrine  which  their  minister 
preached,  and,  as  one  truth  after  another  un- 
folded in  the  bland  and  eloquent  expositions 


24  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

of  the  gifted  author,  they  were  transported 
with  dehght.  In  the  precision  of  a  printed 
book,  and  in  the  free,  inartificial  language 
of  a  layman,  they  understood  the  Gospel. 
In  Christ  believed  they  found  their  peace  with 
God  ;  in  Christ  loved  they  learned  a  new  mo- 
rality. It  was  Dr.  Buchanan's  scriptural 
preaching  and  elevated  walk  which  first  pre- 
possessed them  in  favor  of  vital  godliness,  and 
which  long  continued  to  be  the  chief  means  of 
building  them  up  in  faith  and  holiness ;  but  it 
was  the  "  Practical  View"  which  first  corrected 
their  self-righteous  errors  and  first  taught  them 
God's  own  method, — the  rehgion  of  receiving 
and  relying. 

After  this  the  Canongate  Church  was  dearer 
than  ever.  With  sacred  delight  they  hailed 
the  return  of  the  Sabbath,  and  to  them  the 
most  hallowed  spots  in  the  world  were  tlie 
dusky  pulpit  in  which  re-appeared  that  man 
of  God,  and  their  own  family  pew  with  its 
faded  lining  of  green  baize.  With  its  brown 
light,  its  heavy  pillars,  and  clumsy  sounding- 
board,  and  with  an  audience  becoming  rapidly 
more  and  more  plebeian,  that  sanctuary  had 
charms  which  more  classical    structures   and 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN  25 

more  fashionable  resorts  could  never  counter- 
vail. It  was  the  Bethel  where  God  first  met 
them,  and  during  each  sojourn  in  Edinburgh, 
the  youngest  sister  used  always  to  revisit  it, 
till  shortly  before  the  time  when  she  arrived  at 
"  her  Father's  house  in  peace."  • 

Now,  also,  was  found  the  benefit  of  "  two 
walking  together."  Miss  Sinclair's  seriousness 
and  reflectiveness  at  an  earlier  period  had 
proved  of  essential  service  to  Miss  Janet;  and 
now  that  service  was  requited,  for,  indulging 
the  metaphysical  propensity  of  her  mind.  Miss 
Sinclair  was  soon  involved  in  perplexity  as  to 
the  primary  truths  of  revelation.*  The  doc- 
trines of  the  Trinity,  the  incarnation,  the  eter- 
nity of  future  punishment,  the  Divine  sove- 
reignty, all  in  succession  proved  stumbling- 
blocks  ;  and  though  much  distressed  at  her 
own  reluctant  doubts,  she  had  not  within  her 
own  resources  the  means  of  removing  them. 

In  spiritual  matters  her  only  confidant  was 
her  younger  sister  ;  but  a  mind  like  hers  could 
not  have  sought  a  better  counsellor.     To  Miss 

*  "We  liere  anticipate  the  narrative  by  a  iew  years.  It 
•^as  not  till  Miss  S.  had  reached  her  21st  year  that  she  felt 
the  doubts  described  above. 

3 


26  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQUHOUN. 

Janet  the  Gospel  had  always  been  its  own 
witness.  She  cared  not  to  reason  about  "  fate, 
free-will,  foreknowledge,  knowledge  absolute  :" 
but  she  saw  the  glory  of  God  in  the  face  of 
Jesus  Christ.  To  her  the  religion  of  the  Bible 
was  beaurtful.  To  her,  in  His  revealed  char- 
acter, God  was  light,  and  she  perceived  no 
darkness  at  all.  To  her  the  Bible  was  truth, 
and  the  Gospel  was  the  wisdom  of  God.  And 
instead  of  debating  with  her  sister,  she  directed 
her  mind  to  the  same  objects  which  had  assur- 
ed herself.  That  which  she  had  seen  of  the 
Word  of  Life  she  declared  to  her  disquieted 
friend ;  and  by  dwelling  on  the  fitness  of  the 
Gospel,  and  the  loveliness  of  the  Saviour's 
character,  and  by  urging  her  to  pray,  she 
sought  to  bring  that  friend  to  "fellowship  with 
the  Father,  and  with  his  Son  Jesus  Christ." 
And  she  succeeded.  By  means  of  the  more 
prominent  and  practical  truths  of  Christianity, 
she  conjured  away  her  sister's  abstruser  doubts 
and  intellectual  difficulties,  and  had  the  happi- 
ness to  see  that  dearest  of  her  kindred  a  sharer 
of  her  own  ingenuous  and  healthful  piety.  Our 
language  contains  few  summaries  of  Evangel- 
ical Christianity  more  simple  and  comprehen- 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN.  27 

sive  than  Hannah  Sinclair's  "Letter  on  the 
Principles  of  the  Christian  Faith ;"  and  in 
reading  it  we  feel  our  interest  deepened  by  re- 
membering that  tliis  labor  of  sisterly  love  is  in 
good  measure  the  result  of  sisterly  prudence 
and  piety;  for  under  the  blessing  of  God  the 
Spirit  it  was  her  younger  sister's  meekness  of 
wisdom  and  simplicity  in  Christ  which  mainly 
contributed  to  establish  Hannah  Sinclair  in  the 
"Christian  Faith." 

But  an  event  had  now  occurred  which, 
whilst  it  left  them  attached  as  ever,  interrupt- 
ed their  daily  communings.  On  the  13th  of 
June,  1799,  and  in  the  nineteenth  year  of  her 
age.  Miss  Janet  Sinclair  was  united  in  marriage 
to  James,  eldest  son  of  Sir  James  ColquhouD 
of  Luss,  Baronet. 


CHAPTER  II 


ORO"W   IN    GRACE,  AND    IN    THE    KNOWLEDGE  OF  OUR    LORD   AND 
SAVIOUR    JESUS    CHRIST. 2  PETER  IIL  18. 


Lady,  that  in  the  prime  of  earliest  youth 

Wisely  hast  shiinn'd  the  broad  way  and  the  green, 

And  with  those  few  are  eminently  seen, 

That  labor  up  the  hill  of  heavenly  truth, 

The  better  part,  with  Mary  and  with  Ruth, 

Chosen  thou  hast. 

Thy  care  is  fix'd,  and  zealously  attends 

To  fill  thy  odorous  lamp  with  deeds  of  light, 

And  hope  that  reaps  nut  shame. 

Milton's  sonnets. 


Has  the  reader  ever  spent  a  bright  day  on 
Loch  Lomond  ?  Has  he  gone  at  leisure,  and 
carried  to  it  a  spirit  free  from  guilt  and  fore- 
boding ?  Rising  heaUhily  and  praying  ear- 
nestly, has  he  opened  his  soul  and  consented 
beforehand  to  let  in  all  the  wonder  and  deliglit 
with  which  the  great  Creator  may  be  pleased 
to  fill  it?  And,  in  his  own  hired  boat,  drop- 
ping from  isle  to  isle,  has  he  taken  leisure  to 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ,UHOUN.  29 

gaze  and  meditate  and  dissolve  into  the  scene? 
And  was  there  ever  day  hke  that?  Not  that 
you  can  describe  the  sights  unutterable;  though 
you  carry  within  yourself  placid  visions  and 
sunny  images  of  which  you  know  that  the 
origin  was  there:  a  silvery  fulness,  and  stand- 
ing forth  from  it,  mossy  rocks  and  clumps  of 
verdure;  a  giant  mountain  on  a  throne  of 
empyrean,  with  a  foot-stool  of  lazulite ;  vistas 
through  the  hot  and  flickering  air,  such  as  the 
fire-tinted  pencil  of  Turner  only  can  depict ; 
pure  summits  and  a  polished  flood,  which  made 
you  think  of  the  hills  of  immortality,  and  the 
snowy  robes  w^iicli  sweep  the  sea  of  glass : 
whilst,  like  the  music  which  breaks  a  dream 
and  then  makes  it  beatific,  through  all  the 
trance  there  went  and  came  the  sense  of  a 
pervading  Presence, — the  nearness  of  that 
Eternal  Wisdom  which  built  the  mountain 
and  up  to  its  green  edging  brimmed  the  flood. 
But  though  no  words  can  restore  the  land- 
scape, you  remember  how  it  refined  your  per- 
ception and  ennobled  all  your  faculties :  the 
fallow-deer  on  Inchlonaig  and  Inchmurrain 
grew  tall  as  the  elk,  and  you  were  sure  that 
the  hawk  was  an  eagle.  The  Persicaria  in 
3* 


30  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQUHOUN. 

the  baj^s,  with  its  rosy  spikes,  and  the  toad- 
flax on  the  beach,  were  new  and  gorgeous 
flowers  ;  and  Bible  texts  and  stanzas  of  favor- 
ite hymns  thrilled  j^ou  with  excessive  emotion. 
You  had  put  off  the  commonplace,  and  were 
clothed  upon  with  fine  and  pellucid  senses  ; 
and  there  was  no  longer  aught  tame  or  vul- 
gar in  the  world,  for  you  yourself  were  nobler. 
With  a  keen  eye  for  its  varied  beauties,  the 
subject  of  our  biography  now  found  her  home 
in  one  of  the  loveliest  regions  of  all  tliese 
lovely  shores.  Surrounded  by  stately  trees, 
and  sheltered  from  the  blast  by  the  ferny  slopes 
of  a  Highland  Mountain,  Rossdhu  looks  out 
upon  Loch  Lomond,  where  its  waters  are 
widest   and   its    isles    and    margins    fairest.* 

*  A  small  volume  has  been  compiled,  describing  tbe  sen- 
sations of  different  travellers  in  visiting  Niagara.  A  similar 
volume  might  be  devoted  to  Loch  Lomond.  Such  experi- 
ences are  interestmg.  Be  it  the  perfection  of  grandeur  or 
the  perfection  of  beauty,  the  tendency  of  noble  scenery  is  to 
concentrate  the  soul,  and  notliing  can  be  more  revealing  of 
the  real  character  than  the  genuine  utterance  of  sucli  intensi- 
fied moments.  And,  after  the  lake  in  all  its  loveliness  had 
subsided  mto  her  cahn  and  daily  consciousness,  few  tilings 
•were  more  delightful  to  Lady  Colqulioun  than  to  witness  the 
rapture  of  a  fervent  novice.    Neai*  the  mansion  of  Rossdhu 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  31 

And,  though  encompassed  by  soft  lawns  and 
blossoming  parteiTcs,  it  is  near  enough  to  the 

is  the  Island  of  luclitavanacli,  from  wLose  elevated  crest, 
tradition  says,  a  great  bell  used  to  summon  to  their  several 
chm-ches  the  people  of  four  parishes.  Of  course,  this  belfry- 
knoll  commands  a  splendid  view ;  but,  owing  to  liis  lame- 
ness, it  was  with  some  difficulty  that  they  dragged  Legh 
Richmond  to  the  summit.  Once  there,  however,  they  could 
not  drag  liim  down ;  but,  slowly  revolving  his  radiant  visage, 
and  thi-ough  his  great  round-eyed  spectacles  devouring  the 
landscape,  he  always  hushed  his  fidgetty  companions  with 
the  sentence, — "  The  eye  is  not  satisfied  with  seeing."  But 
a  shorter  glance  sufficed  his  friend  and  contemporary,  Mr. 
Simeon,  of  Cambridge.  With  l^s  usual  vivacity  hapifouetted 
round  to  look  at  every  object  as  they  pointed  it  out ;  then 
turning  to  his  hospitable  guide,  he  exclaimed,  "  Sir  James, 
you  tm-n  to  this  side  and  you  say,  '  That  is  mine  ;'  and  you 
tm-n  to  the  other  side  and  say,  '  That  is  mine ;'  but,"  lifting 
both  his  hands,  "  I  look  up  and  say.  Heaven  is  mine  !"  On 
the  same  spot  Dr.  Chalmers  exclaimed,  "  I  wonder  if  there 
will  be  a  Loch  Lomond  in  heaven  1"  And  there  Dr.  Malan 
knelt  do^vn,  and  poured  forth  the  fulness  of  his  heart  in  such 
a  prayer  as  many  have  heard  beside  his  own  Lake  of  Geneva, 
Perhaps,  however,  the  mood  of  mind  most  congenial  to 
her  own  was  that  expressed  by  one  whom  she  never  person- 
ally knew.  In  the  diary  just  published  of  the  devoted  mis- 
sionary, John  Macdonald,  he  writes,  "  I  took  an  opportunity 
of  visiting  Loch  Lomond,  and  was  exceedingly  delighted.  O 
how  sweet  and  tranquil .  was  the  bosom  of  the  lake  !  I 
thought  of  the  '  peace  of  God  that  passeth  understanding.' " 


32  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ,UHOUN. 

mountains  to  be  constantly  visited  by  breezes 
from  the  broom  and  the  heather.  Some  of  the 
windows  look  out  on  a  ruined  gable  of  that 
castle  from  which  the  fierce  Sir  Humphrey 
used  to  sally  with  his  followers  when  he  went 
to  fight  the  Clan  Gregor ;  and  near  that  castle, 
overshaded  by  ancient  yews,  is  the  roofless 
chapel,  where  the  fierce  Sir  Humphrey  was 
laid  to  sleep  when  all  his  fights  were  over. 
With  its  pictures  and  its  library  and  its  spa- 
cious halls,  with  three  parishes  for  its  manor 
and  the  queen  of  Scottish  lakes  for  its  out- 
look, and  with  all  the  self-contained  luxury 
which  marks  the  country-seat  of  a  wealthy 
Baronet,  at  the  period  of  life  most  susceptible 
of  enjoyment,  the  younger  Miss  Sinclair  found 
herself  the  lady  of  Rossdhu.*  But  the  grace 
of  God  had  full  possession  of  her  mind,  and, 
amidst  all  the  blandishments  of  smooth-going 
existence.  He  Himself  was  her  chiefest  joy, 
and  His  Word  her  chosen  guide.  Amidst  all 
the  charms  of  the  landscape  and  the  fascina- 
tions of  refined  society,  she  never  neglected  a 
household  duty.     "The  lines   have  fallen   to 

*  Her  father-in-la'w  died,  and  she  became  Lady  Colquhoun 
in  1805. 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  33 

me  in  pleasant  places,"  was  her  devout  ac- 
knowledgment regarding  her  earthly  lot ;  and, 
though  embowered  in  scenes  so  fair  that  they 
almost  justified  the  relaxation  to  which  they 
perpetually  tempted,  she  never  ceased  to  hear 
a  voice,  authoritative  and  earnest,  saying, 
"  Occupy  till  I  come." 

Of  retiring  habits,  and  fain  to  dwell  among 
his  own  people.  Sir  James  Colquhoun  was 
much  beloved  by  his  dependants.  Personally 
cognizant  of  their  character  and  circumstances, 
there  survived  betwixt  himself,  his  farmers, 
and  cotters,  the  best  relic  of  feudalism, — its 
mutual  affection.  He  took  the  principal  man- 
agement of  his  own  estates,  and  never  turned 
adrift  on  the  world  the  orphan  or  the  widow.* 
It  was  his  greatest  happiness  to  have  a  wife 
hke  Lady  Colquhoun.  At  first,  proud  of  her 
looks  and  her  elegant  manners,  he  learned  to 

*  In  early  life  Sir  James  had  serred  in  the  army.  Having 
raised  a  company  in  his  own  neighborhood,  according  to  the 
regulation  at  that  period,  he  was  appointed  to  the  command 
of  it,  and  thus  joined  his  Regiment  with  the  rank  of  Captain. 
He  was  afterwards  elected  Member  of  Parhament  for  the 
county  of  Dumbarton.  On  the  death  of  his  father  he  retired 
from  the  army,  and  chiefly  resided  on  his  estate,  devoting 
himself  to  its  improvement. 


34  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

value  her  gentle  wisdom  and  unworldly  good- 
ness, till  at  last  harmony  of  affection  merged 
in  harmony  of  faith.  She  saw  his  prejudices 
against  evangelical  religion.  Slie  scarcely 
hoped  to  remove  them  by  conversation ;  but 
she  prayed  for  "  oil  in  her  lamp,"  and  sought 
to  make  her  own  light  shine.  Her  prayers 
w^ere  answered  ;  her  consistency  Avas  rewarded. 
Her  husband  became  gradually  and  more  and 
more  intelligently  attached  to  the  same  prin- 
ciples. In  appointing  pastors  to  the  eight 
parishes  of  which  he  w^as  patron,  it  was  his 
first  anxiety  to  find  ministers  of  fervent  piety. 
And  when,  by  and  by,  he  was  chosen  an  elder 
of  the  Church,  and  had  a  voice  in  its  supreme 
Assembly,  his  vote  was  always  given  for  those 
measures  wliich  conferred  privileges  on  Chris- 
tian congregations,  and  which  promised  most 
effectually  to  extend  the  Gospel. 

Luss  can  boast  of  more  than  one  celebrated 
divine.  It  was  here  that  Maclaurin  com- 
menced his  eminent  ministry,  and  here  that 
he  would  have  been  content  to  spend  his  life 
in  preaching  those  sermons  so  full  of  holy 
eloquence  and  magnificent  theology.  And  it 
was  here  that  John  Colquhoun  was  born.     In 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  35 

his  boyhood  he  herded  sheep  on  the  Mulea 
Hill,  and  till  thirty  years  of  age  plied  the 
shuttle  of  a  hand-loom  weaver,  when  he  got 
his  heart's  desire, — went  to  College,  and  be- 
came one  of  the  most  useful  preachers  and 
solid  authors  of  the  Scottish  Church.  But,  for 
many  years  after  Lady  Colquhoun  came  to 
Rossdhu,  the  parish  minister  was  Dr.  John 
Stuart.  Although  not  eminent  as  a  preacher, 
he  was  famed  for  his  scholarship  and  his 
scientific  attainments.  To  his  knowledge  of 
the  original  Scriptures,  and  to  the  idiomatic 
purity  of  his  Gaehc,  the  Highlanders  are 
mainly  indebted  for  the  perfection  which  their 
version  of  the  Bible  has  attained.  And  at  a 
time  when  few  cared  for  natural  history,  he 
was  pursuing  it  with  enthusiasm  among  the 
mountains  of  Breadalbane ;  and  with  such 
success,  that  when  Pennant,  Lightfoot,  and  Sir 
Joseph  Banks  came  to  explore  the  Scottish 
Fauna  and  Flora,  it  w^as  from  Mr.  Stuart  they 
derived  their  most  important  information.  The 
"Manse  Garden,"  at  Luss,  contained  many 
exotic  rarities,  and,  still  more  interesting  to  the 
botanist,  many  of  the  scarcest  plants  of  Scot- 
land ;  and  in  that  garden  it  was  a  great  delight 


36  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

to  Lady  Colquhoun  to  walk,  and  view  those 
treasures  with  wliich  no  hand  might  tamper 
save  the  Doctor's  own.  In  these  visits  she 
was  soon  mucii  prepossessed  in  favor  of  the 
minister's  eldest  daughter.  Along  with  her 
father's  warmth  and  generosity,  Miss  Stuart 
inherited  much  of  his  talent  and  his  turn  for 
botany.  She  w^as  often  the  companion  of  his 
rambles  through  the  glens,  and  up  the  moun- 
tains, and,  having  on  these  occasions  shared 
all  the  delight  of  his  discoveries,  she  could 
guide  the  curious  traveller  to  the  spot  where 
the  Lysimadda  thyrsiflora  or  the  Osmunda 
regalis  flourished,  and  knew  where  on  Ben 
Lomond  might  be  gathered  the  finest  speci- 
mens of  the  Sibbcddia  pj^ociimbens  and  the 
purple  Saxifrage.  But,  in  that  amiable  and 
ardent  mind,  Lady  Colquhoun  quickly  recog- 
nized an  affinity  more  precious  still.  Miss 
Stuart's  thoughts  were  deeply  occupied  with 
those  great  truths  in  which  she  herself  had 
found  all  her  salvation  and  all  her  desire;  and, 
until  Miss  Stuart's  marriage  to  an  eminent 
minister,  when  they  met  they  took  every  op- 
portunity to  commune  together  on  the  things 
which  pertained  to  their  everlasting  peace.     lu 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  37 

one  of  these  walks  round  the  garden  at  the 
manse  Lady  Colquhoim  stopped  to  admire  a 
beautiful  dwarf-shrub  (the  Rhododendron  fer- 
rugineum).  Next  morning-,  on  entering  the 
breakfast-room,  she  found  a  tiny  shp  of  the 
plant  in  a  miniature  flower-pot ;  it  grew,  and 
soon  needed  a  larger  receptacle,  and  ere  long 
was  transferred  to  a  choice  plat  of  the  flower- 
garden  ;  and,  on  her  return  from  any  tempo- 
rary absence,  one  of  the  first  spots  which  Lady 
Colquhoun  was  sure  to  visit  was  this  border, 
that  she  might  see  '•  dear  Betsy  Stuart's  plant." 
The  place  no  longer  knows  either,  but  the 
memorial  of  their  hallowed  affection,  the  little 
shrub,  Avith  its  clusters  of  rich  crimson,  still 
flourishes. 

However,  during  the  first  years  of  her  mar- 
ried life.  Lady  Colquhoun  had  much  reason  to 
lament  the  want  of  Christian  society.  Her 
spirit  craved  for  it.  All  her  desire  was  towards 
the  excellent  of  the  earth,  and  when,  with  let- 
ters of  introduction,  pious  strangers  took  their 
place  at  her  table,  or  turned  aside  to  tarry  for  a 
night,  she  had  towards  them  a  venerating  feel- 
ing, as  if  they  were  angels  of  God.  But  usu- 
ally it  was  in  vain  that  she  longed  to  have 
4 


38  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

spiritual  conversation  with  them.  They  as- 
sumed that  she  was  hke  most  gentlewomen  of 
that  day, — more  amiable  and  interesting  than 
many,  but  as  destitute  of  real  religion  as  the 
rest.  And  then,  when  they  had  passed  on  their 
way,  and  when  it  would  have  been  equally  just 
to  have  charged  the  lost  opportunity  to  their 
excessive  prudence  or  erroneous  politeness,  her 
sensitive  spirit  took  home  all  the  blame,  and 
she  upbraided  herself  for  her  sinful  timidity. 
On  the  other  hand,  in  the  visiting  circle  of  her 
own  neighborhood  there  were  at  that  time  few, 
at  least  few  known  to  her,  in  whose  intercourse 
she  could  find  spiritual  invigoration  or  intellect- 
ual enjoyment.  Amongst  the  landed  aristoc- 
racy of  Scotland  there  were  then  less  mental 
expansion  and  less  religious  enlightenment  in 
the  middling  class  of  towns-people,  and  much 
less  than  amongst  their  own  modern  represen- 
tatives. Political  rancor  was  extremely  viru- 
lent. The  prejudice  against  evangelical  Chris- 
tianity was  nearly  universal.  And  if  the  gen- 
tlemen did  not  drink  so  freely  nor  swear  so 
coarsely  as  a  by-gone  generation,  they  did  not 
read  their  Bibles  more,  nor  keep  the  Sabbath 
better.     Card-parties,  elaborate  carriage  airings, 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLGIUHOUN.  39 

and  the  news  of  the  neighborhood,  were  the 
recreations  of  their  wives  and  daughters ;  but 
few  took  pains  to  cultivate  their  minds,  and 
still  fewer  were  engaged  in  works  of  usefulness ; 
so  that  in  the  general  absence  of  literary  tastes 
and  refined  enjoyments,  the  houses  of  our 
Scotch  grandees  repeated  with  awful  uniformity 
the  same  scenes  of  pompous  inanity  and  stolid 
merry-making.  And,  although  there  were  ex- 
ceptions, all  the  more  prized  for  their  rarity,  it 
was  rather  by  an  effort  of  benevolence  than  in 
obedience  to  her  natural  inclinations  that  the 
young  lady  of  the  manor  paid  visits  which 
added  nothing  to  her  mental  resources,  and 
often  left  repentant  misgivings  in  her  devout 
and  conscientious  mind. 

This  comparative  isolation  was  not  without 
its  benefits.  It  gave  a  more  personal  character 
to  her  piety.  Instead  of  deriving  all  her  im- 
pressions and  iinpulses  from  ardent  or  endearing 
friends,  her  religion  increasingly  became  com- 
munion with  the  Saviour.  And  it  left  her  more 
leisure  for  that  employment  into  which  she  had 
thrown  all  her  soul, — the  instruction  and  train- 
ing of  her  children.  And  whilst  it  prepared 
her  for  hailing  with  peculiar  delight  the  con- 


40  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQUHOUN. 

genial  intercourse  at  length  so  abundantly 
vouchsafed  to  her,  it  drew  her  in  tlie  mean- 
while with  especial  tenderness  towards  such 
humble  disciples  as  the  parish  then  contained, 
— those  "  poor"  whom  the  Lord  liad  promised 
that  he  should  "have  always." 

Judging  by  the  hand-writing,  it  was  soon 
after  her  arrival  at  Rossdhu  that  the  following 
"Helps  to  Self-Examination"  were  written 
out; — 


*' HELPS    TO    SELF-EXAMINATION. 

"  1.  Did  1  awake  as  with  God  this  morning  ? 

"2.  How  were  the  secret  devotions  of  the 
morning  performed  ? 

"3.  Did  I  offer  my  praises  of  thanksgiving, 
and  renew  the  dedication  of  myself  to  God 
with  becoming  attention  and  affections? 

"  4.  How  did  I  read  the  Scripture  or  any 
Other  useful  book?  Did  they  do  my  heart 
good? 

"  5.  How  have  the  mid-day  devotions  been 
attended  to? 

"6.  Have  I  pursued  my  common  business 
with  diligence  as  unto  the  Lord  ? 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  41 

"7.  What  time  have  I  lost  this  day.  and  for 
what  cause  ? 

^'  8.  Have  I  seen  the  hand  of  God  even  in 
httle  mercies  and  afflictions? 

"  9.  Have  I  received  my  comforts  witb 
thankfuhiess  and  my  afflictions  with  resigna- 
tion ? 

"  10.  How  have  I  guarded  against  passion 
and  vanity  ? 

"  11.  Have  I  Uved  by  the  faith  of  the  Son  of 
God? 

"  12.  Have  I  governed  my  thoughts  well,  es- 
pecially in  solitude? 

"  13.  What  subject  of  thought  was  chosen 
this  day,  and  how  was  it  regarded? 

"14.  Has  my  heart  this  day  been  full  of 
love  to  God  and  to  all  mankind  ? 

"  15.  How  have  I  profited  this  day  by  the 
negligences  I  observed  in  last  night's  examina- 
tion ? 

"  16.  How  did  I  pray  lat^t  night?" 

In  the  hope  that  it  might  prove  a  stimulus 
to  increased  activity,  and  a  help  in  the  great 
business  of  self-culture,  in  1805  she  began  to 
keep  a  Diary.  Its  precious  volumes  have  been 
intrusted  to  the  perusal  of  the  Editor,  and  have 
4* 


42  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

left  on  his  mind  a  very  sacred  impression  re- 
garding the  sainted  writer.  And  although  ex- 
tracts will  probably  fail  to  transfer  that  impres- 
sion in  its  fulness  to  the  mind  of  the  reader, 
they  may  give  him  some  idea  of  the  tender 
lowlihood,  the  faithful  self-observation,  the  in- 
genuous truthfulness,  the  simple  dependence, 
and  the  devout  aspirations,  which  resulted  in  a 
character  so  complete  and  blameless.  As  illus- 
trative of  her  calm  and  constant  nature,  it  may 
be  right  to  notice  how  perseveringly  this  private 
narrative  was  kept  up.  Perhaps  the  reader  has 
himself  tried  to  keep  a  journal.  In  a  zealous 
moment  he  has  commenced  a  daily  register  of 
employments,  or  the  story  of  a  tour,  or  a  record 
of  his  experiences ;  but  he  soon  wearied  of  its 
methodical  routine,  and  the  written  leaves  have 
long  since  been  cut  away  to  render  the  book 
available  for  some  new  project.  But  Lady 
Colquhoun  was  eminently  steadfast.  Her  un- 
dertakings were  never  prompted  by  romantic 
fancies,  but  by  sober  judgment ;  and,  therefore, 
the  longer  she  persisted  in  them  the  more  she 
liked  them.  And  the  successive  volumes  of 
this  journal,  extending  over  forty  years,  and 
sustained  with  scarcely  an  interruption,  are  only 


.LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UnOUN.  43 

a  symbol  of  that  continuous  industry  with  which 
she  prosecuted  every  enterprise,  and  that  loving 
faithfulness  with  which  she  clung  to  all  her 
friends. 

During  the  first  period  this  Diary  is  usually 
brief ;  but  a  few  specimens  may  throw  some  light 
on  the  writers  position  and  employments : — 

"  Tuesday^  Oct.  15,  1805. — Awoke  in  an 
unhappy  frame,  but  was  enabled  to  pray  with 
fervor.  Prayed  for  an  unlikely  thing,  which  I 
hoped  might  be  helpful  to  my  spiritual  interests. 
To  my  astonishment  my  prayer  was  heard. 
Called  at  Cameron.  Mr.  Slight  came  to  dinner. 
Much  benefited  by  his  prayer." 

Mr.  Slight  was  then,  and  for  a  few  years 
longer,  the  Minister  of  Bonhill.  He  was  a  man 
of  cultivated  mind  and  fervent  piety.  He  some- 
times, but  not  often,  spent  a  day  at  Rossdhu, 
and  "  the  unlikely  thing"  for  which  Lady  Col- 
quhoun  had  prayed  on  the  above  occasion  was, 
that  he  might  be  sent  to  their  house  that  day. 
In  going  to  Cameron  she  met  Mr.  Slight,  who 
stopped  his  horse,  and  said  that  he  was  on  his 
way  to  Rossdhu,  and,  if  convenient  to  her,  he 
would  still  proceed.     The  Journal  resumes  : — • 

"  Wednesday^  16. — Arose   with  God.     Mr. 


44  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

Slight  left  us.  The  joy  of  God's  salvation  re- 
stored. 1  would  do  anything  for  a  continuance 
and  increase  of  it.  Retired  twice  to  read  and 
pray  for  some  time  during  the  forenoon. 

"  Saturday,  Dec.  28. — Resolved  to  read  no 
more  novels,  having  been  enticed  to  read  one 
which  too  much  occupied  my  time.  Retired, 
and  read  and  prayed  with  much  love  and  trust 
in  my  Lord.  This  week  and  last  T  have  seen 
how  unable  I  am  to  resist  temptation.  Oh  ! 
that  Christ  would  strengthen  me  ! 

"  Saturday^  July  21,  1810. — Prayed  ear- 
nestly to  be  kept  from  worldly-mindedness  this 

day,  being  to  dine  at .     Escaped  pretty 

well  at  the  dinner-party  ;  but  I  fear  transgressed 
in  the  evening  at  the  theatre,  where  I  went 
without  wishing  it." 

As,  in  the  sequel  of  this  Journal,  there  will 
be  no  allusion  to  the  theatre,  it  may  be  right  to 
mention,  that,  up  to  this  period,  and  in  deference 
to  the  wishes  of  others,  Lady  Colquhoun  occa- 
sionally went  to  it ;  but  she  had  long  ceased  to 
feel  happy  there.  With  successive  visits  her 
repugnance  strengthened,  and  soon  after  the 
above  was  written  she  saw  so  clearly  the  sinful- 
ness of  patronizing  such  places,  that  she  made 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLGLUHOUN.  4n 

a  decided  stand,  and  never  entered  a  playhouse 
again. 

"  Sunday ^  Aug.  12. — Do  not  remember  for 
a  long  time  being  so  little  disposed  for  the 
services  of  the  day.  Prayed  in  the  morning 
seriously,  but  with  little  hfe.  Unfortunately  no 
service  at  Luss.*  Read  a  sermon  aloud,  but 
felt  little  interested.  Heard  the  children,  and 
by  reading  Doddridge's  'Rise  and  Progress' 
tried  to  find  out  what  I  should  do  when  this 
deadness  is  upon  me.  Read  over  this  book  and 
felt  a  little  enlivened  by  finding  some  of  my  own 
experience  in  it.  In  temptation,  without  Christ 
I  cannot  conquer;  but  through  him  I  may 
surely  do  all  things.  Let  me  struggle  on  in 
the  way  of  duty  ;  He  cannot  forsake  his  own 
servants.  Lord,  Lord,  help  !— After  writing  the 
above,  retired  to  pray  to  my  Lord.  Entreated 
with  great  fervor  to  be  supported  in  the  ways 
of  God,  in  the  midst  of  innumerable  evils.  In 
prayer  my  faith  and  love  revived.  How  gra- 
cious is  my  Lord  ! 

*  The  communion  was  then  dispensed  in  most  rural 
parishes  only  once  a-year ;  and,  as,  the  pastors  and  flocks  of 
adjacent  parishes  used  to  adjourn  to  the  scene  of  its  celebra- 
tion, each  pulpit  was  apt  ixi  be  vacant  several  times  in  the 
course  of  the  summer. 


46  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

"  Thursday^  23. — Delighted  with  some 
pleasing  accounts  of  George. 

"  Friday,  Oct.  12.— Sir  J.  and  Lady  McGre- 
gor Murray  here.     Read  and  prayed  early. 

^^  Saturday,  Oct.  13. — This  Avhole  day  so  en- 
gaged as  to  find  if  impossible  to  read  the  Bible. 
Prayed  in  the  forenoon,  and  felt  affected  while 
walking  in  the  island  among  the  tombs.* 

''^Sunday,  Nov.  25. — Read,  with  delight, 
'Theron  and  Aspasio,'  on  the  freeness  with 
which  Christ  is  offered.  Retired  and  prayed, 
with  tears,  for  acceptance  and  pardon. 

^^  Smiday,  April  14,  1811. — Have  been  three 
months  in  Edinburgh,  from  which  I  returned 
about  a  week  ago ;  and,  though  constant  oc- 
cupations of  one  sort  or  other  have  prevented 
my  writing,  I  now  set  my  hand  to  it  that  God 
is  true  and  merciful  to  those  who  trust  in  Him. 

I  left  this  place  fearful  that  the  dissipations 
of  an  Edinburgh  winter  w^ould  draw  my 
thoughts  from  my  only  real  good  ;  but,  mer- 
ciful Lord,  thou  hast  made  me  more  than  con- 
queror !  My  prayer  was,  that  thou  wouldest 
shine  as  a  Light  around  me  in  temptation, 
and  surely  thou  hast  heard  me.  The  means 
*  Inch  Cailliach  is  tlie  burymg-ground  of  the  M'Gregora 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN.  47 

of  grace  were  powerful,  and,  by  the  Holy 
Spirit  working  in  them,  far  outdid  any  con- 
trary influence.  The  Sabbaths  I  was  able 
regularly  and  delightfully  to  keep,  and  I  had 
an  opportunity  of  sitting  down  at  the  table  of 
the  Lord  w^hen  Dr.  Buchanan  preached, — a 
time  which  I  hope  was  not  lost  to  me.  Now  I 
return  here  to  the  want  of  those  lively  means  ; 
but,  Lord,  thou  art  here  also.  Hold  thou  me 
up,  and  I  shall  be  safe ;  and  so  shall  I  keep 
thy  statutes  continually. 

"  Wednesday^  April  17. — Prayed  fervently 
in  the  morning.  Resisted  a  temptation  to  an- 
ger. This  day  I  am  thirty  years  old.  Let  me 
now  bid  a  cheerful  adieu  to  my  youth.  My 
young  days  are  now  surely  over,  and  why 
should  I  regret  them  ?  Were  I  never  to  grow 
old  I  might  be  always  here,  and  might  never 
bid  farewell  to  sin  and  sorrow.  Lord,  teach 
thy  servant  to  rejoice  in  the  hope  of  thy  glory. 

"  Saturday,  July  13.— Sir  W.  W.  W.  and 
Mr.  and  Mrs.  S.  and  Mr.  C.  came.  Prayed 
that  my  affairs  might  be  ordered  for  me,  and 
that  the  duties  of  to  morrow  might  not  be  in- 
terrupted. 

"  Sunday,  14.— All  our  visitors  went  away 


48  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQUHOUN. 

before  breakfast,  except  Mr.  C,  who  is  almost 
no  interruption  to  my  devotions.  Prayed 
in  the  morning  with  much  thankfulness.  God 
is  my  Helper  in  every  time  of  need. 

^^  Friday^  26. — Read  with  pleasure,  and  saw 
my  adoption  from  the  character  of  the  children 
of  God.  How  great  is  my  privilege !  I  would 
not  resign  it  for  worlds. 

"  Sunday^  28. — Meditated  with  pleasure  on 
the  Divine  disposal  of  all  my  concerns. 

"  Saturday^  Aug.  3. — Mr.  Campbell  and 
Wilhelmina*  here.  Happy  to  find  dear  W. 
still  pious  as  I  remember  her.  Meditated  with 
pleasure  on  the  goodness  of  God  to  her  and  to 
me,  and  to  all  his  people.  Oh  !  how  does  He 
heal  our  backslid ings  and  forgive  us  freely  ! 

"  Monday,  5. — Had  a  long  conversation 
with  Wilhelmina  at  night  on  religious  subjects. 

^^  Sunday,  18. — Heard  the  childien. 
made  me  happy  by  saying  she  often  forbore 
doing  what  she  thought  displeasing  to  God, 
and  that  she  prayed  for  His  Spirit  every  day. 
Prayed  for  them  all  with  much  earnestness  and 
with  thankfulness  for  every  serious  impression. 

*  Sister  of  Sir  James  Colqulioun,  and  \vife  of  John  Camp 
bell,  Esq.,  of  Stonefield. 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN.  49 

"  Tuesday,  Sept.  3.— The  light  of  God's 
countenance  restored.  Convinced  that  I  would 
be  heard  by  my  gracious  Lord,  from  consider- 
ing tliat,  when  on  earth,  He  never  rejected 
any  one  who  appUed  to  Him  for  either  tempo- 
ral or  spiritual  blessings. 

^^  Friday,  Nov.  1. — Forgave  an  injury,  in 
order  to  follow  Christ. 

"  Saturday,  July  25,  1812. — Read  on  the 
religious  education  of  children  ;  which  led  me, 
with  my  whole  soul,  to  pray  for  God's  blessing 
on  my  endeavors  to  bring  up  mine  in  the  ways 
of  piety.  He  knows  my  almost  only  wish  for 
them  is  directed  to  this  end. 

"  Thursday,  Sept.  24.— Mr.  Millar  and  his 
friend,  Mr.  Gorham,  here.  Feel  refreshed  by 
the  sight  of  these  dear  disciples  of  my  Lord, 
though  I  had  no  opportunity  of  conversing 
with  them  on  religious  subjects. 

"  Friday,  25. — When  it  is  so  pleasant   to 

meet  with  Christ's  people  here,  think,  O  my 

soul,    how  delightful  will   be   the   society  of 

heaven !      Feel   a   desire   to   depart,    but   am 

grieved  that  I  love  my  Lord  no  better.     I  long 

for  more  acquaintance  with  Him.     However, 

I  feel  assured  that  I  am  his,  and  trust  to  his 
5 


50  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

promise,  that  I  shall  one  da}^  be  as  1  would. 
Did  not  resent  an  injury. 

''Sunday,  Feb.  7,  1813.— Daring  the  past 
week  have  got  by  degrees  into  a  more  com- 
fortable frame,  not  from  being  sensible  of  any 
amendment  in  myself,  but  from  trust  in  my 
Saviour,  and  from  being  sensible  that  I  must 
rest  in  Him,  sinful  as  I  am.  Feel  very  com- 
fortable, and  full  of  faith  in  the  atonement  of 
Christ.  Resolved  to  endeavor  never  to  think 
of  myself  any  more,  but  to  look  on  my  salva- 
tion as  finished,  whatever  my  frame  may  be. 

"  April  4.* — In  these  duties  not  very  lively, 
but  have  an  abiding  persuasion  of  acceptance 
through  the  righteousness  and  atonement  of 
my  all-righteous  Saviour.  Refreshed  with  the 
text,  '  Whosoever  receiveth  whom  I  send  re- 
ceiveth  me,  and  he  that  receiveth  me  receiveth 
Him  that  sent  me.'  Surely  I  joyfully  receive 
and  attend  to  the  people  of  God.  In  the 
evening  had  a  conversation  with  Sir  James  on 
religious  subjects,  w^iich   greatly  pleased  me. 

*  After  tliis  period  Lady  Colquhoun  usually  wrote  in  her 
Journal  only  once  a-week,  viz.,  on  each  Sabbath.  Unless, 
therefore,  the  day  of  the  week  be  mentioned,  the  reader  will 
understand  that  it  was  the  Lord's-day. 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQUHOUN.  51 

Oh !  how  are  my  prayers  continually  an- 
swered ! 

"  25. — Walked  alone.  My  meditation  sweet. 
Among  other  things  reflected  with  pleasure  that, 
as  every  creature  is  placed  in  a  situation  most 
adapted  to  his  wants,  so  surely  that  noblest 
work  of  God,  the  new  creature,  must  and  shall 
be  one  day  placed  where  it  shall  grow  and 
flourish.  Oh  !  that  I  were  thus  transplanted  ; 
for  this  world  is  indeed  a  barren  soil. 

"  Affg-.  15. — Went  to  church  at  Bonhill,  there 
being  no  sermon  at  Luss.  One  part  of  Mr. 
Gregor's  discourse  struck  me.  Speaking  of  our 
justification,  he  said,  '  that  the  people  of  God, 
or  believers  in  Christ,  are  really  as  much  in  a 
state  of  acceptance  as  their  Lord  Himself: 
He  being  their  Surety,  all  their  debt  is  paid, 
and  there  is  nothing  to  object  against  them.' 

"  Sept.  19. — For  some  months  have  been  led 
continually  to  meditate  on  death,  and  anxiously 
to  wish  that  I  could  look  with  outstretched  neck 
to  the  time  of  my  dismission.  My  fears  of  it 
begin  to  abate.  I  feel  lieartily  willing  to  leave 
the  world,  which,  except  for  my  friends  in  it, 
has   no  attraction    to   me.     What  principally 


52  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

stag^geis  me  is,  that  I  do  not  sufficiently  love 
my  Lord,  and  long  to  be  with  Him. 

''Edinburgh,  Feb.  13,  1814.— Got  a  tooth 
extracted  yesterday ;  and  one  thing  which  in- 
fluenced me  was  the  desire  to  attend  the  house 
of  my  God  to-day.  The  gum  was  still  painful 
when  exposed  to  air ;  however,  I  resolved  to  go 
and  hear  Dr.  Buchanan.  Refreshed  by  the 
sermon,  though  sometimes  in  much  pain.  One 
remark  comforted  me, — that  love  to  our  Chris- 
tian brethren  it  a  sure  sign  of  being  Christ's 
disciples  ;  as  mentioned  more  than  once  in  the 
Bible.  I  do,  indeed,  with  my  whole  heart,  love 
them. 

"  Rossdh/f,  April  10. — We  all  returned  safe 
home  last  week  accompanied  by  Hannah,  and 
Mr.  Proudfoot,*  who  conducted  family  worship, 
which  I  wished  to  establish,  and  we  are  to  have 
it  every  Sabbath  evening.  I  hope  it  may  turn 
out  for  the  good  of  us  all. 

•'  June  26. — No  sermon  at  Luss.  Heard  Sir 
James  read  one.  Went  out  and  meditated  on 
the  love  of  Clirist,  and  liis  frequent  exliortations 
to  faith.  Oh  !  that  I  could  not  doubt,  and  then 
I  might  say  to  this  mountain  of  sin, — '  Be  thou 

*  Then  tutor  of  her  sons,  afterwards  Minister  of  Arrochar. 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQUHOUN.  53 

removed,  and  it  should  be  done,'  and  nothing 
should  be  impossible  to  me.  Well,  I  trust  my 
Lord  has  undertaken  to  cure  my  hard  heart, 

"  July  24. — Impressed  with  the  shortness  of 
my  abode  in  this  world,  which  is  to  me  a  reviv- 
ing, as  well  as  awful  idea.  Indeed,  I  would 
not  live  here  always. 

^'- Sept.  4. — In  the  past  week  Hannah  left 
me,  and  I  parted  with  her  and  with  my  father 
and  Lady  Sinclair  with  more  regret,  as  they 
are  shortly  going  to  England  to  reside  and  I 
can  see  comparatively  little  of  them.  But  shall 
I  not  trust  to  my  Lord  that  all  is  right  and 
well  ?  I  know  tliat  this  dispensation  is  for  good 
for  me  and  us  all,  and  I  would  not  alter  it. 

"  Edinburgh^  Jan.  15, 1815. — At  St.  George's 
in  the  morning,  and  heard  Mr.  Thomson.  At 
the  Canongate  in  the  afternoon,  and  heard  Dr. 
Buchanan,  Ps.  cxvi.  16.  He  concluded  with  a 
few  advices  to  those  who  were  determined  to 
serve  the  Lord  : — '  1.  Beware  of  self-confidence. 
2.  Beware  of  sloth.  3.  Beware  of  worldly- 
mindedness.  4.  Mix  not  too  much  with  the 
world.  5.  Be  constant  and  fervent  in  prayer. 
6.  Be  sure  you  trust  in  the  mediation  of  Christ, 
and  in  him  only.'  Oh  !  what  means  of  grace 
6* 


54  LIFE    OF    I.ADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

do  I  here  eiijoy,  for  which  in  some  periods  of 
my  hfe  I  would  have  given  anything.  As  yet 
hule  templation  has  befallen  me  tln-onghont 
the  week.  Have  found  benefit  by  realizing  the 
presence  of  Christ  wdien  in  the  w^orld.  Were 
He.  indeed,  visibly  there,  how  httle  should  I 
care  for  others  ! 

^'  Feb.  5. — At  Mr.  Grey's  chapel  in  the  after- 
noon. He  preached  on  the  forgiveness  of  in- 
juries. By  the  help  of  grace,  resolved  to  prac- 
tise this  difficult  duty  in  its  fullest  extent.  I 
trust  I  am  not  utterly  a  stranger  to  it. 

"  12. — In  the  past  week  put  in  practise,  as 
far  as  possible,  my  intentions  as  to  forgiveness. 
Think  Mr.  Grey's  sermon  was  designed  for  my 
good,  as  I  had  much  to  try  me  in  many  little 
things,  which  are  sometimes  as  difficult  to  over- 
look as  greater  matters. 

"  March  26. — After  dinner  we  made  an  at- 
tempt to  hear  Mr.  Chalmers,  but  the  crowd  was 
so  great  we  could  not.  Felt  disappointed,  par- 
ticularly as  it  is  my  last  opportunity  here  ;  but 
was  soon  reconciled.  I  have  more  need  to  go 
home  and  meditate  and  pray.  Did  so,  and  my 
heart,  from  being  dead,  became  alive  to  God. 

"  Rossdhu,  April  23. — Have  of  late  been  dis- 


LIFE    OP    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  55 

tressed  with  the  weakness  of  my  faith,  which 
cannot  take  Christ  at  his  word  when  He  says 
that  He  will  receive  all  who  come  to  Him.  I 
can  reason  very  well,  that  He  could  do  no  more 
to  show  this  willingness,  and  that  we  must  buy 
ivithout  money  and  xoithout  jjrice  ;  and  yet  I 
cannot  feel  satisfied,  because  I  do  not  love  my 
Lord  sufficiently.  What  is  this,  however,  but 
resting  on  my  own  performances?  And  did  I 
love  Him  as  his  dearest  saint,  it  would  only  be 
the  work  of  his  own  Spirit,  and  He  can  work  it 
even  in  me.  If  not,  I  will  endeavor  to  rest  on 
his  naked  word,  that  I  am  accepted  in  Him. 
This  night  my  faith  firmer. 

"  July  25,  Tuesday. — This  day  met  with  a 
trial  of  its  kind.  Mrs.  Millar  had  given  Mr. 
Simeon,  of  Cambridge,  a  letter  of  introduction 
to  me.  I  should  have  been  delighted  to  see 
him,  in  hopes  of  getting  some  refreshment  from 
his  conversation  and  prayers ;  but,  from  some 
accident,  he  went  away  before  I  Ivliew  of  it : 
and  although  I  sent  to  Luss,  I  found  he  was 
gone.  Of  course,  this  was  ordered  by  my 
Heavenly  Father ;  but  I  have  found  it  hard  to 
be  resigned.  Lord,  I  hope  I  could  be  more 
easily  reconciled  to  temporal  losses  ;    but  per- 


56  LIFE    OF    LAD!^    COLaUHOUN. 

haps  not.  Oh !  if  I  may  not  receive  help 
from  men,  be  thyself  my  light  and  my  salvation ! 
"  27,  Thursday. — The  Lord  has  heard  my 
prayer. — This  day  Mr.  Proudfoot  lent  me  '  Ed- 
wards on  the  Religious  Affections.'  On  reading 
it  I  felt  a  stronger  impression  of  the  reality  of 
Divine  things,  and  of  the  infinite  holiness  and 
beauty  of  God  and  my  Redeemer,  than  I  recol- 
lect for  very  long.  I  now  feel  more  certain  of 
being  his  ;  have  more  love  to  Him  ;  and  (what 
makes  me  hope  it  is  indeed  his  Spirit's  influ- 
ence) am  more  humble.  Lord,  I  bless  thee  for 
this  refreshment.  Thou  hast  seen  fit  to  do  thy 
work  without  any  intercourse  w^ith  creatures, 
and  now  I  am  resigned.  Mrs.  Millar,  in  her 
last  letter,  mentions  her  meeting  with  Mr.  Sim- 
eon, who  took  leave  of  her  in  these  words, — 
'God  bless  you.  Commit  yourself  to  Him. 
Keep  Him  in  your  heart.  Remember  there  is 
no  happiness  without  Him,  either  here  or  in 
heaven^ 

'  ^^  Earnock  House^  Aug.  10. — Have  been 
here  for  some  days,  and  have  left  Hannah  at 
Polkemmet.  Arose  early  this  morning  to  read 
and  pray.  At  church  in  the  forenoon  at  Ham- 
ilton, and  in  the  afternoon  at  Blantyve,  when 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  57 

Dr.  Hodson  gave  us  an  excellent  sermon  on 
pra)'er,  and  the  certainty  of  its  prevalence  if 
offered  for  things  agreeable  to  the  will  of  God. 
How  often  have  I  experienced  this ;  and  do  I 
not  now  experience  it  ?  having  prayed  for  the 
presence  of  God,  and  that  I  might  hear 
his  Word  faithfully  preached?  I  have  met 
with  the  people  of  God  in  my  journey,  and  Mr. 
Millar  has  given  me  many  religious  books  to 
read. 

"  Rossdhu,  Oct.  8. — Prayed  but  coldly  in 
private,  but  with  fervor  in  the  family.  What 
a  refreshment  is  family  prayer,  when  my  heart 
is  dull,  but  longing  for  grace  ! 

"  Edinhurgh,  Feb.  11, 1816.— TSot  at  church 
in  the  morning,  having  ear-ache.  Have  reason 
to  be  thankful  for  this  complaint, — it  has  kept 
me  from  two  parties  ;  and  the  day  before  I  took 
it  I  had  heard  of  the  great  attainments  of  poor 
Bell  (formeily  my  housemaid),  who,  amidst 
great  bodily  distress,  has  become  eminently 
pious.  I  felt  envious,  and  almost  prayed  that 
I  might  be  made  such  by  any  means  ;  but  God 
soon  taught  me  gratitude  for  the  good  health 
I  enjoy.     Pain  is  hard  to  be  borne. 

"  March  16. — Another  striking  event  among 


58  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

our  connections  happened  last  week  in  the  sud- 
den death  of  Lord  Polkemmet.  He  had  been 
long  complaining,  but  was  much  in  his  usual 
way,  when  he  dropped  down  and  expired. 
Have  been  much  with  Mrs.  Baillie,  and  have 
tried  to  comfort  her  and  raise  her  mind  to  God. 
I  also  saw  the  corpse — the  first  I  ever  saw.  I 
felt  no  terror;  but  to  me  the  sight  was  rather 
consolatory.  I  thought — Is  this  all  death  can 
do  if  we  are  Christ's  ?  then,  I  will  not  fear  it. 

"Marc/i  31. — And  now  I  am  come  to  my 
last  Sabbath  in  Edinburgh,  and  this  day  took 
leave  of  the  dear  pew  in  the  Canongate  Church, 
where  my  first  religious  impressions  were 
awakened  ;  for  this  spring  the  church  is  to  be 
fitted  up  anew,  and  the  seats  altered.  As  I 
left  it,  could  not  help  feeling — Thanks,  thanks, 
O  my  God,  that  I  ever  sat  there  !  Praised  be 
my  gracious  Lord  that  I  ever  heard  Dr.  Bu- 
chanan and  sat  under  his  ministry  !  Glory  be 
to  God,  Father,  Son,  and  Holy  Spirit,  that  it 
was  effectual  to  lead  me  to  Him  !  Now  I  leave 
the  means  I  so  much  love ;  nevertheless,  I  am 
continually  with  Thee.  Thou  wilt  hold  me  by 
my  right  hand. 

"  JRossdhu,  April  14. — Read  Dr.  Colquhoun 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  59 

on  '  Spiritual  Comfort.'  Think  I  enjoy  what 
he  describes  as  the  lowest  degree  of  it, — a  hope 
in  the  mercy  of  God  through  Christ,  and  a 
trust  that  everything  shall  be  ordered  for  the 
best  for  me.  How  often  have  I  wished  for 
more  !  How  have  I  longed  for  joy  unspeaka- 
ble and  full  of  glory !  But  it  is  all  right 
and  well  ordered.  My  easy,  comfortable  life 
does  not  require  those  supports  which  are 
afforded  in  pain  and  suffering ;  and  my  weak 
heart  would  perhaps  grow  vain  if  I  were  not 
often  reminded  that  I  am  nothing  and  can  do 
nothing. 

"  April  28. — Sir  James  and  his  brother  were 
ordained  elders.  How  truly  did  I  join  in  the 
prayers  which  were  offered  up  for  them  !  Last 
week  I  was  much  distressed  with  the  fear  that 
my  sweet  had  formed  an  improper  ac- 
quaintance, and  had  got  much  attached  to  her. 
After  fervent  prayer,  spoke  to  her,  w  th  tears, 
on  the  subject,  and  she  gave  me  every  satisfac- 
tion I  could  wish,  seeming  willing  to  do  what 
I  pleased.  Oli,  my  God  !  protect  my  children! 
Make  them  Thine,  early  Thine,  forever  thine  ! 
I  ask  nothing  for  them  but  in  subservience  to 
this.     My  whole  drift  in   their  education  has 


60  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQUHOUN. 

been  towards  this  end ;  but,  Lord,  thou  only 
canst  give  the  increase. 

''''June  23. — Was  afraid  of  Lord  and  Lady 

being  here  either  to-day  or  next  Sunday  ; 

but  my  God  has  heard  my  prayers,  and  they 
are  to  come  on  Wednesday.  This  week  have 
the  prospect  of  being  four  days  following  in  the 
world :  have  prayed  for  support.  I  feel  the 
influence  of  worldly  company  less  hurtful  than 
I  once  did,  and  can  lift  up  my  heart  to  God  in 
the  midst  of  it  much  more  frequently. 

^'-Jidy  18,  Thursday. — My  dear  Hannah  ar- 
rived here  on  Tuesday.  I  have  reason  for 
thankfulness  that  her  life  is  still  spared.  Oh 
that  she  may  enjoy  when  here,  and  while  life 
lasts,  the  fulness  of  the  blessing  of  the  Gospel 
of  Christ !  This  is  the  fast-day  preparatory 
to  the  Sacrament.  This  communion,  I  have 
little  prospect  from  means,  as  even  Mr.  Gregor 
is  not  to  be  here.  But  I  must  endeavor  to  look 
from  the  dispensers  to  the  ordinance. 

"  19,  Friday  [before  the  Coniviiniion). — Let 
me  examine  my  evidences  of  faith  in  Christ. 
In  the  first  place,  I  have  no  reliance  on  any- 
thing I  have  done,  or  can  do,  for  acceptance 
with  God.     Secondly,  I  do  trust  in  Christ  alone 


LIFE    OP    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  61 

for  salvation ;  and,  were  I  to  die  this  moment, 
I  should  have  no  other  plea  before  the  throne 
but  his  life  and  his  death.  Thirdly,  I  have 
given  myself  up  to  Him,  and  am  endeavoring 
to  do  his  will  and  live  to  his  glory ;  but  '  faith 
works  by  love,'  and  here  the  weakness  of  mine 
is  very,  very  perceptible.  O  my  Lord,  how 
little  do  I  love  thee !  Yet,  methinks,  I  must 
love  thee,  when  I  can  be  satisfied  with  nothing 
without  thee,  and  when  I  almost  think  I  could 
be  satisfied  with  thee  and  with  nothing  else ; 
when  I  love  thy  image  wherever  I  find  it ;  and 
when  I  desire  communion  with  thee  more  than 
anything  else.  'Faith  purifies  the  heart.' 
"Whatever  defilement  there  may  be,  and  un- 
doubtedly is  in  mine,  yet  its  desires  are  after 
purity;  and  surely  I  should  not  do  justice  to 
the  work  of  the  blessed  Spirit,  did  I  not  think 
that  it  is  more  pure  than  once  it  was,  or  than 
it  would  have  been  without  this  gracious  influ- 
ence. 'Faith  overcomes  the  world.'  Here  I 
can  be  more  decided.  The  world?  it  is  noth- 
ing to  me  ;  its  pomps,  its  pleasures,  its  vanities, 
— all  nothing,  nothing.  Its  cares  are  far  less 
than  they  once  were.  Its  sorrows  I  know  not 
6 


62  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

how  I  may  feel,  but  I  trust  for  Almighty  sup- 
port.    Faith  has  overcome  the  world. 

''^  Sept.  29. — -My  dear  Hannah  leaves  me  to- 
morrow. God  only  knows  if  we  shall  meet 
again  ;  however,  she  (as  well  as  I)  belongs  to 
Him,  and  it  will  be  ordered  for  the  best  for  us 
both. 

"  Nov.  24.— Read  '  Life  of  Mrs.  Newell'  For 
some  time  past  I  have  been  in  an  uncommon 
state  of  mind,  as  I  think,  owing  to  one  and 
another  difficulty  and  trial.  Feel  in  the  strong- 
est manner  the  importance  of  religion,  and  it 
is  continually  in  my  thoughts,  and  yet  my 
affections  seem  dead.  Read  to  the  children 
both  before  and  after  dinner.  Heard  them, 
and  prayed  with  them.  Happy  to  hear  them 
say  that  they  had  prayed  alternately  aloud  in 
a  room  by  themselves.  Is  not  this  some  sign 
of  good  impressions  ? 

'Teh.  2,  1817.— After  dinner  read  to  Sir 
James  the  '  Life  of  General  Burn,'  a  most  in- 
teresting book.  I  feel  quite  happy  here  in  my 
beloved  retreat,  away  from  the  gay  and  busy 
world.* 

*  This  winter  was  spent  at  Rossdhu.     Her  sons  and  their 
tutor  were  in  Edinbui'gh. 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  63 

"  May  4. — Reading  '  Doddridge's  Lectures 
on  Divinity,"  delighted  to  find  some  cases  de- 
scribed as  frequently  occurring  to  Christians 
similar  to  my  own  experience.  For  instance, 
texts  of  Scripture  occurring  Avith  power  to  the 
mind.  Well  do  I  recollect  'the  deceitfulness 
of  riches'  occurring  to  me  again  and  again, 
almost  as  if  I  had  heard  a  voice,  and  when  I 
could  not  recollect  in  what  part  of  the  Bible  it 
occurs ;  and  still  the  impression  of  it  is  fresh. 
Then,  a  strong  persuasion  of  some  particular 
request  being  granted,  which  removes  from  the 
spirit  an  overwhelming  burden.  Yes,  my  God, 
I  know  this  case  by  experience.  Thou  hast 
seen  me  for  weeks  oppressed  and  groaning 
under  what  seemed  a  wound  incurable,  but 
thy  own  sweet  words,  O  Saviour  !  healed  it, — ■ 
'  All  things  whatsoever  ye  ask  in  prayer,  be- 
lieving, ye  shall  receive.'  Man,  I  knew,  would 
tell  me  I  must  not  take  these  words  so  literally; 
but  I  determined  to  credit  God.  I  see  no  lim- 
itation, and  I  will  make  none  ;  and  never  since 
have  I  doubted  that  I  shall  be  heard.  Some 
signs  of  it  I  already  see.  I  seldom  read  this 
verse  without  tears,  and  the  chapter  containing 
it  (Matthew  xxi.)  is  dear  to  me. 


64  LIFE    OF    LADY    CC  LQUHOUN. 

''Maij  8,  Thursday.— Ml- .  Proudfoot  was 
ordained  Minister  of  Arrochar.  And  now,  my 
God,  who  would  not  trust  thee?  'In  the 
shadow  of  thy  wings  will  I  make  my  refuge, 
until  all  calamities  be  overpast.  I  will  cry 
unto  God  Most  High,  unto  God  that  ferformeth 
all  things  for  me.''  I  went  up  to  Arrochar 
and  witnessed  the  ordination.  Mr.  Gregor 
conducted  the  service  uncommonly  well.  His 
text  was,  '  Necessity  is  laid  upon  me  :  yea,  woe 
is  unto  me  if  I  preach  not  the  Gospel.'  The 
crowd  was  great,  and  he  preached  in  the  tent. 

"  June  8. — Read  to  Sir  James,  and  prayed 
for  a  blessing.  I  never  had  more  delightful 
views  of  the  Lord  Jesus  than  last  night,  in 
reading  the  parable  of  the  good  Samaritan. 
What  a  beautiful  one  it  is !  I  could  have 
kissed  his  sweet,  compassionate,  heavenly 
words.  Art  thou,  Lord,  such  a  pure,  glorious, 
gracious  Being ;  and  yet  do  I  sometimes  fear 
thee  as  my  enemy  ?  Thou  knowest  the 
reason.  Nothing  but  thy  Spirit  can  open 
mine  eyes,  and  I  will  trust  thee  that  it  shall 
be  given.  The  most  delightful  view  I  can 
form  of  heaven  itself  is,  that  I  shall  love  and 
serve  thee. 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  65 

"  July  17,  Thursday.— T\\\^  being  the  fast 
before  our  Sacrament,  rose  earlier  and  thought 
over  my  sins  with  penitence.  How  constantly 
do  I  sin  in  neglecting  God, — that  God  who  is 
giving  me  so  much  to  be  grateful  for  !  How 
constantly  do  I  sin  in  my  best  works  !  How- 
ever praiseworthy  in  the  sight  of  men,  every 
action  is  defiled  with  this  disgusting  quality. 
My  most  fervent  prayers  are  tainted  with  this 
poison.  My  most  self-denied  labors  for  the 
good  of  others  are  sometimes  rendered  unwor- 
thy in  the  sight  of  God  by  pride.  And  how 
often  am  I  far  more  gratified  by  thinking  that 
a  pious  action  will  procure  me  the  approbation 
of  the  dear  disciples  of  my  Lord,  than  of  that 
Lord  himself!  .Oh!  vanity,  how  dost  thou 
defile  my  almost  every  thought !  And  have  I 
not  been  envious  ?  Am  1  clear  of  doing  injury 
to  the  souls  of  my  dearest  friends,  and  of  all 
around  me,  by  neglect  ?  These  are  a  few  of 
innumerable  sins.  '  Woe  is  me  !  for  I  am  of 
unclean  lips,  and  dwell  in  the  midst  of  a  peo- 
ple of  unclean  lips  V  but  let  a  coal  from  thine 
altar  touch  them,  and  take  my  iniquity  away. 

a  27.— Expected  that  Sir  Gregory  and  Lady 
Way  would  have  been  here  to-day.     Once,  a 


66  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

sight  of  these  disciples  would  have  been  quite 
a  refreshment  to  me  ;  now,  through  the  good- 
ness of  God,  I  have  much  more  intercourse 
with  his  people.  I  suppose  we  shall  see  them 
to-morrow. 

"  Oct.  26. — Dined  out  yesterday.  All  seem- 
ed to  make  light  of  religion,  or  worse.  I  dared 
to  put  in  one  word  for  it,  and  am  happy  to 
think  I  gain  a  little  more  courage  in  this 
respect.  Why, — oh  !  why  have  I  been  taken 
out  and  made  separate  ?  Why  ?  but  because 
God  would  be  a  Father  to  me,  and  would  have 
me  for  a  daughter  even  of  the  Lord  Almighty ! 
Oh  !  that  He  may  dwell  in  me,  and  walk  in 
me,  and  be  my  God  forever  and  ever !"' 

Lady  Colquhoun's  Journals  have  left  upon 
our  mind  a  delightful  impression  of  sincerity 
and  PROGRESS.  Whilst,  on  the  one  hand, 
there  is  no  constructive  effort  to  prove  against 
herself  infirmities  and  sins  with  which  she 
was  not  chargeable ;  on  the  other  hand,  every 
significant  circumstance  in  her  spiritual  his- 
tory, whether  encouraging  or  adverse,  is  de- 
tailed with  scrupulous  accuracy.  And,  as  the 
great  end  which  she  kept  constantly  in  view 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN.  67 

was  self-improvement,  she  was  not  content 
with  confiding  to  these  mnemonic  pages  iier 
weekly  portraiture,  but  against  detected  faults 
she  resolved  and  prayed  and  watched  until 
they  were  completely  overcome.  God  gives 
grace  to  the  humble,  and  when,  in  later  hfe, 
she  perused  these  minute  and  ingenuous  rec- 
ords, she  must  have  been  cheered  by  a  thank- 
ful consciousness  of  expanding  views  and  ma- 
turing character. 

And  should  any  reader  of  this  narrative 
have  adopted  a  similar  plan  for  his  own  im- 
provement, may  we  suggest  that  its  entire 
value  will  depend  on  similar  faithfulness? 
Apart  from  the  haunting  idea  that  it  may  fall 
into  other  hands,  a  diary  will  prove  a  snare  if 
its  writer  tries  to  feel  other  people's  feelings, 
and,  failing  that,  uses  language  in  advance  of 
his  own  experience.  Like  those  piratical  mol- 
luscs which  take  up  their  abode  in  the  re- 
jected shells  of  their  neighbors,  the  religious 
professor  who  only  prays  or  journalizes  in 
other  men's  phrases  will  be  sure  to  distort  or 
dwarf  his  piety.  And  in  the  subject  of  this 
biography  we  see  how  much  more  growthful 
is  a  lowly  commencement,   if  genuine,  than 


68  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

the  most  brilliant  beginnings,  if  made  in  bor- 
rowed exiivise. 

Although  we  have  forborne  from  transcrib- 
ing those  passages  in  which  a  mother  pours 
forth  her  desires  and  prayers,  in  the  foregoing 
pages  the  reader  has  obtained  occasional 
ghmpses  of  her  parental  affection  and  assidu- 
ity. During  this  period  lier  main  employment 
was  the  education  of  her  two  daughters.  With 
the  exception  of  some  branches,  for  which, 
wiiilst  in  Edinburgh,  she  called  in  the  aid  of 
masters,  she  taught  them  everything  herself; 
and  in  the  illusion  of  her  own  dear  society  her 
pupils  never  felt  a  task  in  any  lesson.  On  the 
Sabbath  evening  they  w^ere  joined  by  their 
three  brothers,  and  the  time  was  spent  in  re- 
peating the  catechism  and  hymns  and  psalms, 
and  in  hearing  their  mother  read  some  book 
adapted  to  their  years.  Amongst  her  papers 
were  found  two  letters,  the  one  addressed  to 
her  sons  and  the  other  to  her  daughters. 
They  are  not  dated,  but  must  have  been  writ- 
ten when  her  children  were  very  young,  and 
when  she  had  on  her  own  mind  the  impression 
that  she  might  soon  be  taken  from  them : — 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  69 

"  My  dearest  James,  and  John,  and  William, 

"I  cannot  leave  you  in  this  vain  world 
without  one  parting  advice,  and  without  once 
more  assuring  you  how  dear  you  have  ever 
been  to  me.  Now  tliat  my  body  is  consigned 
to  the  grave,  and  my  soul  has  returned  to  God 
who  gave  it,  to  you,  my  dear  children,  it  will 
not  signify  whether  you  ever  knew  a  mother's 
care  or  not,  except  in  so  far  as  you  profit  by 
her  counsel.  Let  me,  therefore,  ask  you,  and 
let  me  beg  that  you  would  ask  it  of  your  own 
consciences, — -Are  you  living  to  God?  Are 
you  trusting  in  Christ  for  salvation,  and  obey- 
in  s:  his  commands  ? 

"  To  promote  this  my  every  thought  with  re- 
gard to  you  has  been  subservient.  Were  I 
assured  of  this,  I  should  feel  comparatively 
easy  as  to  everything  else.  Oh!  my  children, 
this  is  the  one  thing  needful. 

"  I  feel  a  pleasing  confidence  that  none  of 
you  are  ignorant  of  the  method  by  which  sin- 
ners obtain  reconciliation  with  God.  I  would, 
therefore,  only  urge  your  immediate  acceptance 
of  Christ  as  your  Saviour ;  of  God  as  your 
God.     There  is  no  impediment  on  God's  part. 


70  LIFE    OP    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

Blessed  be  His  name,  all  His  offers  are  free  ; 
be  willing,  then,  and  you  are  His  for  evermore. 

"  How  many  temptations  you  must  pass 
through  1  tremble  to  think  of;  but  I  have  an 
assurance,  which  I  would  not  part  with  for 
worlds,  that  my  prayers  for  you  are  heard,  and 
will  be  answered,  when  I  am  sleeping  in  the 
dust.  I  feel  a  hope  that  you  will  be  blessings 
to  the  circle  in  which  you  move,  and  that  you 
will  glorify  God  by  your  conduct  through  hfe. 
What  higher  honor  can  you  aspire  to  ! 

"  You,  my  dearest ,  v^ill  probably  have 

many  opportunities  of  usefulness.  If  you  live 
)'0u  will  have  much  of  this  world's  good  things 
to  dispose  of;  value  them,  I  beseech  you,  only 
as  giving  you  more  of  the  power  to  do  good. 
Oh  !  let  all  you  are  and  all  you  have  be  de- 
voted to  God.  Encourage  every  useful  under- 
taking, and  give  liberally  to  the  poor,  as  you 
have  received  liberall}'^  from  God.  Do  all  in 
your  power  to  place  pious  clergymen  in  any 
church  in  which  you  may  have  influence,  for 
this  is  a  most  important  method  of  doing  good. 

'•Should  any  of  my  dear  boys  think  of  enter- 
ing the  sacred  profession  of  tbe  ministry, — Oh  ! 
consider  the    weight,    the  importance   of   the 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQUHOUN.  71 

charge.  Remember  it  is  doubly  incumbent 
upon  you  to  be  yourself  what  you  exhort 
others  to  be.  I  charge  you,  my  child,  to 
preach  Christ  Jesus  the  Lord.  Remember,  if 
you  do  not  use  every  means  in  your  power 
to  bring  to  the  Saviour  the  souls  of  those  com- 
mitted to  your  charge,  you  are  responsible  for 
them. 

"  With  one  other  advice  I  will  conclude.  I 
exhort  you,  my  dear  children,  if  any  of  you 
should  at  any  future  time  think  of  marriage, 
that  you  will  not  allow  beauty,  or  any  out- 
ward accomplishments,  to  be  the  only  thing 
you  look  for.  In  the  choice  of  a  wife  seek  for 
one  who  fears  and  loves  God,  and  I  will  ven- 
ture to  assure  you  of  happiness  with  her. 
Such  a  one  in  your  own  rank  it  may  be  more 
difficult  to  find  ;  but  among  the  families  of  the 
pious  it  is  far  from  impossible.  Pray  to  God, 
and  he  will  direct  your  choice.  I  trust  you 
wuU  ever  love  and  assist  one  another,  and  be 
dutiful  and  affectionate  to  your  dear  father. 

"And  now,  O  my  God,  shower  down  thy 
grace  in  abundance  on  my  children.  Remem- 
ber all  my  prayers  for  them  :  be  to  them  what 
thou  hast  been  to   me ; — I  can  ask  no  more. 


72  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

'Save  them  from  the  evil  that  is  in  the  world. 
Grant,  oh  !  grant  that  we  may  meet  in  glory, 
through  the  merits  of  thy  well-beloved  Son. 
Amen. 

"  I  remain,  your  most  attached  Mother, 
"Through  life  and  in  death, 

"  J.  CoLaUHOUN.  ^ 

"  Keep  this  letter  by  you,  and  occasionally 
read  it  over ;  when  you  are  older  you  may  un- 
derstand it  better." 

The  following  are  extracts  from  a  similar 
letter  addressed  to  her  daughters  : — 

"  My  dearest  Sarah  and  Helen, 

"  When  this  shall  be  put  into  your  hands,  I 
hope,  my  darling  children,  you  will  be  in  some 
degree  reconciled  to  the  loss  it  has  pleased  God 
you  should  sustain  in  the  death  of  your  most 
affectionate  mother.  I  am  sensible  that  it  is  a 
great  loss  to  be  deprived  of  a  parent  whose 
anxious  care  it  was  to  bring  you  up  in  the  fear 
of  the  Lord  ;  and  nothing  could  reconcile  me 
to  the  thought  of  parting  with  you,  but  that  I 
commit  you  to  Him  who  has  been  my  God  in 
life  and  in  death. 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ,UHOUN.  73 

"And  now,  my  children,  when  deprived  of 
an  earthly  parent,  to  whom  should  you  go  but 
to  your  Heavenly  Father  ?  Believe  me,  there 
is  in  Him  enough  to  make  up  for  every  loss, 
and  much  more  than  enough  to  satisfy  every 
desire.  Fall  down  on  your  knees  before 
Him.  Entreat  Him  to  receive  you.  Entreat 
Him  to  be  to  you  what  He  has  been  to  your 
mother.  Entreat  Him  to  guide  and  instruct 
and  sanctify  you.  And  entreat  Him,  through 
the  merits  and  righteousness  of  Christ  Jesus, 
which,  if  you  ask,  are  yours. 

"  Read  the  Bible  carefully,  and  with  a  desire 
to  be  instructed  by  it.  And  pray  for  a  blessing 
on  it.  Read,  also,  other  good  books,  many  of 
which  I  leave  behind  me.  Never  neglect  fer- 
vent prayer. 

"  My  dearest  Sarah,  to  you  I  leave  my  Diary, 
which  you  will  find  in  my  bureau,  in  the  small 
place  that  locks  inside  of  it.  Let  your  brothers 
and  ssiter  see  it ;  and  I  would  recommend  you 
all  to  keep  one  yourselves.  I  have  found  much 
benefit  in  doing  so.  By  it  you  will  judge  what 
were  my  aims  and  desires.  How  far  I  fell 
short,  God  and  myself  only  know.  But  you 
will  also  see,  that  I  have  trusted  alone  for  ac- 
7 


74  LIFE    OF    I-ADY    COLaUHOUN. 

ceptance   in   the   'Lamb  of  God,  who   taketh 
away  the  sins  of  the  w^oild.' 

*'  Dearest  Sarah,  take  some  charge  of  your 
sister.  Endeavor  to  instruct  her  in  those  truths 
in  w^hich  I  have  instructed  you,  and  by  which 
she  was  perhaps  too  young  to  get  much  benefit. 
Try  all  methods  to  win  her  to  the  love  and 
practice  of  religion ;  and  if  they  fail,  try  them 
again.  Be  a  mother  to  her,  and  God  will  bless 
vour  weak  attempts. 

"In  whatever  relation  or  station  you  may  be 
placed,  try  to  act  as  God  would  have  you.  Be 
very  cautious  of  your  friendships.  Shun,  as 
the  plague,  those  who  have  not  the  fear  of  God, 
whatever  other  attractive  qualities  they  may 
possess.  Meet  with  such  you  must ;  but  do  not, 
oh  !  do  not  make  them  your  friends.  Whatever 
it  may  appear  to  you  now,  the  time,  be  assured, 
is  not  far  distant  when  death  shall  snatch  you 
from  everything  here.  Surely,  my  dearest  girls, 
all  my  care,  all  my  prayers  for  you  shall  not 
be  in  vain.  Oh !  then,  dread  the  world  ;  dread 
its  follies,  its  gaieties,  its  company.  Oh  !  then, 
place  your  happiness  in  religion.  Oh  !  then, 
keep  the  commandments  of  God.  Oh  !  fly  to 
Christ  for  redemption.     Do  the  angels  rejoice 


LIFE    OF    LADY   COLQ.UHOUN.  75 

when  one  sinner  repenteth?  and  shall  not  my 
joy  be  unbounded  to  see  my  children  saved 
with  an  everlasting  salvation  ? 

"  With  one  more  request  I  will  conclude. 
My  dears,  do  not  mourn  for  me,  as  those  who 
have  no  hope.  Look  up.  I  am  safe,  1  am 
happy,  unspeakably  happy.  You  may  follow. 
All  things  are  ready  :  Come  to  the  wedding. 
Christ  stretches  forth  his  hand  to  save  and  sup- 
port you ;  put  forth  yours  and  lean  on  the  Be- 
loved. '  The  Spirit  and  the  bride  say.  Come. 
And  let  him  that  is  athirst  come.  And  whoso- 
ever will,  let  him  take  of  the  water  of  life  freely.' 

"  Let  your  brothers,  and,  if  you  like,  your 
father,  see  this  letter  ;  and  get  a  reading  of 
theirs.  Keep  it  by  you,  and  let  Helen  have  a 
copy.  Be  ever  dutiful  to  your  only  remaining 
parent,  and  endeavor  to  prevent  his  feeling  my 
loss. 

"Farewell,  till  we  meet  (oh  !  may  I  not  hope?) 
never  to  part,  where  we  shall  be  ever  with  the 
Lord,  ever  with  one  another.  My  God,  my 
Jesus,  let  thine  everlasting  protection  shield  my 
children  from  all  evil.  Save  them,  and  they 
shall  be  saved.  Make  them  holy  and  heavenly. 
I  have  endeavored  to  lead  them  to  Thee ;  re- 


76  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

ceive  them  graciously,  love  them  freely,  and 
even  in  glory  put  a  new  song  into  my  mouth, 
— praise  for  the  wonders  of  redeeming  love  to 
those  dear  as  a  right  hand. 

"  I  die,  as  I  have  lived, 

"  Your  most  anxiously  attached  mother, 
"J.  C0LQ.UH0UN." 


CHAPTER  III 


REMEMBERING    YOUR    WORK    OF    FAITH,    AND    LABOR    OF    LOVE, 

AND     PATIENCE    OF     HOPE   IN    OUR    LORD    JESUS    CHRIST. 1 

3. 


Therefore  love  and  believe;  for  works  will  follow  spontaneous 
Even  as  day  does  the  sun  ;  the  right  from  the  good  is  an  offspring, 
Love  in  a  bodily  shape  ;  and  Christian  works  are  no  more  than 
Animate  love  and  faith,  as  flowers  are  the  animate  spring-time. 

LONGFELLOW. 


Hitherto  the  summers  of  Rossdliu  had  been 
often  cheered  by  long  visits  from  a  beloved  sis- 
ter ;  but  the  last  of  these  had  now  been  paid, 
and,  in  the  spring  of  1818,  that  sister  lay  a  dy- 
ing invalid  at  Ham  Common,  in  Surrey. 
There,  besides  the  affectionate  assiduities  of 
her  own  family,  she  was  favored  with  occa- 
sional visits  from  a  faithful  minister  of  Christ, 
and  the  frequent  society  of  an  attached  Chris- 
tian friend.  Lady  Colquhoun  could  not  come 
7* 


78  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLGIUHOUN. 

to  her,  but,  on  this  very  account,  her  supphca- 
tions  were  the  more  ceaseless,  and  her  sohcitude 
reheved  itself  in  letters,  which,  for  their  sisterly- 
tenderness  and  faithfulness,  proved  the  chief 
cordial  of  the  weary  sufferer.  In  penning  them 
the  fond  writer  sought  help  from  a  Wonderful 
Counsellor,  and,  as  they  were  full  of  His  wis- 
dom, as  well  as  her  own  Avarm-heartedness, 
they  always  arrived  like  "  words  in  season." 
Miss  Sinclair  kept  them  under  her  pillow,  and 
used  to  have  them  often  read  over  to  her. 

The  following  extracts  from  her  Journal 
show  how  the  mind  of  Lady  Colquhoun  was 
exercised  during  this  anxious  spring: — 

"  Rossdhu,  March  8,  1818. — After  church 
was  quite  overcome  by  receiving  two  or  three 
hues  from  my  dearest  Hannah,  written  with 
great  difficulty  and  in  much  weakness,  but  ex- 
pressive of  the  composure  of  her  mind,  and 
resignation  to  every  issue.  Oh  !  my  God,  1 
will  praise  thee!  Yes,  I  will  praise  thee  even 
in  the  fire  of  affliction,  when  thus  tempered 
with  mercy. 

"  April  12. — It  has  pleased  the  Lord  to  lay 
his  afflicting  hand  upon  me ;  but  it  has  also 
pleased  him  in  great  mercy  to  support  me.     I 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUH©UN.  79 

heard  yesterday,  that  my  dearest  sister  is  no 
better,  and  getting  still  weaker.  I  have  been 
agitated,  but  quite  resigned  ;  and  I  see  so  much, 
so  very  much  mercy  in  every  part  of  the  dis- 
pensation, that  I  dare  do  nothing  but  lie  quietly 
in  the  hand  of  God.  After  some  thought,  I 
wrote  her  a  letter  telling  her  of  her  danger. 
Oh  !  how  was  I  puzzled  how  to  frame  it !  but 
I  trust  my  pen  was  guided  by  an  invisible 
Hand.  O  Lord  !  accompany  this  bit  of  paper  ; 
be  with  her  when  she  opens  it ;  support  her 
spirits;  give  her  triumph  in  the  thought  of 
death  !  I  trusted  to  thee  for  direction  ;  may  it 
answer  the  end  for  which  I  wrote  it !  Em- 
ployed much  as  usual  to-day :  but  in  the  eve- 
ning felt  nervous  and  unwell.  Still  I  have  the 
greatest  possible  confidence  in  the  safety  of  the 
dear  saint.  I  cannot  mourn  as  those  who  have 
no  hope,  and  I  could  not  have  believed  that  I 
should  be  so  tranquil. 

"  26. — Oh  !  I  am  cold  and  dead  at  present. 
I  am  indeed  worthless  ;  my  services  worthless, 
my  heart  worthless.  I  feel  some  pleasure  in 
writing  these  lines,  and  making  this  acknowl- 
edgment. In  glory,  and  there  alone,  shall  I 
love  and  serve  my  God.     And  heaven  is  mine, 


80  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ,UHOUN. 

— freely  and  without  money,  mine.  Had  not 
Christ  died,  my  portion  were  hell.  Had  the 
happiness  yesterday  to  hear  that  dear  Hannah 
is  no  worse,  and  that  Mr.  Gandy  and  Miss 
Massie  were  to  see  her.  How  kindly  is  God 
dealing  with  her ;  and  thus  he  deals  with  all 
who  are  his. 

'-^  May  10. — Prayed  with  sincerity  in  the 
morning,  and  laid  all  my  burdens  on  my  cov- 
enant God ;  for,  burdens  I  have,  and  one  very 
heavy  to  be  borne.  All  hope  is  over.  Dear, 
dear  Hannah  is  much  worse,  and  I  look  for  her 
death  every  day.  Still,  Lord,  thou  art  faithful, 
thou  art  kind.  Did  not  I  pray  for  evidence  as 
to  her  eternal  state  ?  and  is  not  my  prayer  fully 
answered  ?  Is  she  not  everything  I  could 
wish?  a  pattern  of  meekness,  patience,  long- 
suffering, — faith  ?  What  would  I  have  more  ? 
Must  she  be  detained  from  glor}^  because  I  can- 
not part  with  her  ?  No,  Lord  !  I  would  only 
still  further  implore  that  thy  everlasting  arms 
may  enfold  her  now  and  for  evermore;  that 
her  passage  through  the  dark  valley,  which  is 
but  a  '  shadow,' may  be  easy,  and  that  thou 
wouldst  be  graciously  pleased  to  support  me, 
thy  poor  afflicted  servant,  and  sanctify  it  to  me. 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ,UHOUN.  81 

"  17. — Received  a  very  gratifying  letter  from 
my  sister  Catherine ;  not  that  my  Hannah  is 
getting  better :  my  dear  saint  must  go  to  her 
bhssful  home;  but  I  was  gratified  with  the 
affection  expressed  for  her  and  me,  and  above 
all,  with  the  piety  which  appeared  in  it.  There 
is  the  fruit  of  my  Hannah's  labors. 

"  24. — My  beloved  sister  still  lives  ;  at  least, 
I  have  not  heard  of  her  death.  Oh  !  how  hard 
it  is  to  give  up  one  so  truly  dear ;  yet  I  feel  re- 
signed. My  heart  is  sometimes  rent,  especially 
when  I  hear  anything  of  her  affection  for  me ; 
but,  in  general,  I  am  calm  to  a  miracle.  God 
has  done  it.  In  this  trying  dispensation,  how 
kind  has  he  been  to  me,  warning  me  for  eleven 
years  of  its  approach,  and  at  last  taking  her  in 
the  gentlest  manner.  I  trust,  too,  it  has  already 
been  sanctified.  My  heart  has  been  raised  to 
Jesus,  and  I  have  been  enabled,  in  a  faltering 
manner,  to  lean  on  the  Beloved.  Could  I  but 
know  this  dear  Lord,  I  should  trust  him. 

"  Tuesday^  26. — Hosanna  !  Hosanna  in  the 
highest !  I  have  just  heard  that  my  beloved 
Hannah  is  in  glory  !  What  cause  for  praise  ! 
*Unto  Him  that  loved  us,  and  washed  us  from 
our  sins  in  his  own  blood,  and  hath  made  us 


82  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

kings  and  priests  unto  God,  and  his  Father,  to 
him  be  glory  and  dominion  forever  and  ever. 
Amen.'     Sweetest  saint,  thou  art  now  far  re- 
moved from  me;  but  far,  also,  from  sin  and 
sorrow,    and   enjoying   the   presence   and   the 
smiles  of  Jesus.      Oh,   that  my  end  may  be 
peaceful,  like  thine  !     Not  a  fear  disturbed  thy 
serene  composure,  and  thou  slippedst  gently 
away,  as  if  afraid  of  disturbing  others.     Oh, 
my  Hannah,  hardly  shall  I  find  thy  equal,  as 
none  can  be  equal  to  me  !  yet,  could  raising  a 
finger  bring  thee  back,  I  would  not  be  so  cruel. 
Though    I    must    sojourn    here   a   longer   or 
shorter  time  without  my  darling  sister,  have 
we  not  an   eternity  to  spend   together?     Let 
me  rejoice  in  the  thought.     Oh,  that  I  could 
raise  this  dead  heart  above  the  world  !     My 
God  !  sanctify  this  event  to  me,  and  accept  my 
praise  for  thy  great  kindness  to  the  dear  de- 
parted, and  for  so  wonderfully  supporting  me. 
"  31. — Beloved  Hannah  !    I  would  once  more 
write  a  little  to  thy  beloved  memory.     What  a 
heart   was   thine  ! — filled  with  the  desire   of 
doing  the  will  of  God,  and  of  conferring  good 
on    all   around   thee.     Yet,    hadst    thou    died 
some  years  ago,   I  should  not  have  been  so 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN.  83 

confident  of  the  safety  of  thy  state.  God 
heard  my  prayers,  and  completely  estabhshed 
thee  in  the  faith,  and  now  I  have  nothing  to 
say  but  'Alleluia:  for  the  Lord  God  omnipo- 
tent reigneth.  Let  us  be  glad  and  rejoice,  and 
give  honor  to  him  :  for  the  marriage  of  the 
Lamb  is  come,  and  his  wife  hath  made  herself 
ready.  And  to  her  was  granted  that  she  should 
be  arrayed  in  fine  linen  :  for  the  fine  linen  is 
the  righteousness  of  saints.' — Read  to  myself 
and  Sir  James.  Read  to  my  children  with 
much  enlargement.  At  night  prayed  with 
tears.  Even  my  prayers  distress  me,  for  I  used 
always  to  pray  for  my  dear  departed  Hannah. 
I  cannot  omit  her  name,  so  I  turn  it  into 
thanksgivings  for  God's  goodness  to  her." 

Miss  Sinclair  died  on  the  22d  of  May,  and 
soon  after  her  death  a  little  volume  was  pub- 
lished, containing  her  own  beautiful  "Letter 
on  the  Principles  of  the  Christian  Faith,"  and 
a  brief  memoir  from  Legh  Richmond's  happy 
and  descriptive  pen.  In  its  accessible  pages 
the  reader  may  learn  more  fully  how  worthy 
was  Hannah  Sinclair  of  her  sister's  devoted 
love,  and  how  full  of  immortahty  was  the  hope 
whicU  sparkled  amidst  that  sister's  tears ;  and 


84  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

it  is  only  for  us  to  add,  how  fraught  with 
peaceful  fruits  to  the  survivor  w^as  this  long 
and  deeply-felt  affliction.  These  chapters  may 
be  read  by  some  who  have  sustained  recent 
bereavements ;  if  so,  may  their  sorrow  in  like 
manner  be  sanctified  ! 

And,  perhaps,  the  most  natural  effect  of  this 
trial  on  a  mind  like  hers,  was  the  effect  which 
Calvin's  death  produced  on  Beza, — "  Now  is 
heaven  more  dear,  and  death  less  dreadful." 
She  had  learned  how  lightsome  the  Saviour 
can  make  the  dark  valley,  and  she  almost 
wished  that  she  had  traversed  it  when  the 
"door  of  hope"  opened  so  wide,  and  let  so 
much  of  glory  shine  athwart  it.  And  she 
could  think  of  the  better  country  more  vividly, 
because  one  so  familiar  was  there.  To  quote 
some  of  the  simple  rhymes  into  which  about 
this  period  her  contemplations  often  ran : — 

In  sweet  surprise  that  anthem  swelling 

With  notes  of  joy  and  love ; 
"What  seraph's  form  is  this  that  treads 

Jerusalem's  courts  above  ? 

That  form,  methinks,  I  yet  should  know ; 
That  heart,  it  once  was  mine ; 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLGIUHOUN.  85 

And  still,  my  Hannah,  does  my  soul 
Unite  in  love  to  thine. 


Together,  from  our  earliest  years, 

In  every  thought  united, — 
Each  in  the  other's  grief  downcast, 

In  th'  other's  joy  delighted. 

Oh !  may  "we  still  such  union  prove, 

And  one  in  Christ  be  found ; 
And  through  one  glad  eternity 

The  Saviour's  praise  resoimd. 

Arrayed  in  the  deep  mourning,  which  was 
little  needed  to  remind  her  of  her  loss,  many- 
were  the  solitary  walks  she  now  took  in  the 
garden,  and  in  the  sequestered  by-paths  of  the 
"  Policy  ;"  and  there,  or  seated  on  the  margin 
of  the  silvery  lake,  she  loved  to  meditate  on 
the  multitude  before  the  throne  :  and  just  as  in 
that  multitude  she  recognized  one  dear  as  her 
own  soul,  for  that  dear  one's  sake  "  the  Lamb 
in  the  midst  of  the  throne"  became  yet  dearer. 
Nor  was  it  long  till  the  sisterly  thoughts,  which 
used  to  travel  to  England,  as  naturally  as- 
cended to  heaven. 

But  along  with  this  result  came  another,  as 
hnportant.  For  many  years  she  had  ceased  to 
8 


86  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

live  unto  herself;  but  up  to  this  period  her 
solicitude  and  self-denial  had  been  mainly  for 
her  husband,  her  children,  and  her  immediate 
family  circle.  This  Providence,  however,  broke 
open  a  door  of  exit,  and  bade  her  seek  a  wider 
sphere.  She  received  it  as  a  personal  message, 
and,  admonished  that  "  the  time  is  short,"  she 
looked  eagerly  around  for  opportunities  of  larger 
usefulness. 

Accordingly,  the  first  time  that  her  neigh- 
bors saw  her,  except  at  Church,  was  at  the 
formation  of  a  Bible  Society,  a  few  weeks 
after  her  bereavement.  The  day  is  thus  re- 
corded in  her  Diary: — 

'•'•  Monday^  June  29. — I  had  the  happiness 
of  witnessing  the  estabhshment  of  a  Bible 
Society  at  Luss.  It  is  to  be  called  '  The  Luss 
and  Arrochar  Bible  Society.'  I  hope  1  w^as  of 
some  use  in  setting  it  a-going,  though  not  the 
original  mover.  O  Lord,  I  rejoice  to  be  in  any 
way  the  instrument  of  forwarding  thy  king- 
dom in  the  world,  and  saving  poor  lost  souls. 
With  delight  I  heard  Sir  James  make  a  most 
excellent  speech  on  accepting  the  oflice  of 
President ;  and  thus  supported,  I  trust  it  may 
be  of  great  benefit  to  the  neighborhood." 


LIFE    OP    LADY    COLQUHOUN.  87 

And  from  this  time  forward  she  devoted 
herself  in  more  systematic  efibrts  to  the  poor 
of  her  vicinity.  And  although  the  national 
reserve  prevented  her  from  gaining  all  the  ac- 
cess she  desired,  or  doing  all  the  good  she 
wished,  her  labors  of  love  were  generally  ap- 
preciated, and  she  was  conscious  of  a  recom- 
pense in  her  own  soul. 

"  Blessed  is  he  that  wisely  doth 
The  poor  man's  case  consider :" 

So  sings  the  Scottish  version  of  the  forty- 
first  Psalm ;  and  we  have  often  heard  that 
most  enlightened  of  the  poor  man's  friends, 
Dr.  Chalmers,  quote  it  with  applauding  em- 
phasis. And  there  was  much  "wisdom"  in 
the  w^ay  that  Lady  Colquhoun  dealt  with  "  the 
poor  man's  case."  Amongst  the  natives  of 
Luss  she  found  Scottish  pride  in  union  with 
Celtic  touchiness.  Under  the  home-spun  coat 
and  Highland  bonnet  it  was  the  same  high 
mettle  which  often  stalks  in  hungry  magnifi- 
cence beneath  the  Spanish  cloak  and  sombrero, 
afraid  of  obligation,  and  affronted  at  alms- 
dvins:.  "Na,  na,  I'm  no  in  want,"  was  the 
instinctive  rejoinder  of  a  tattered  old  woman, 
as   a  stranger   slipped   half-a-crown   into   her 


88 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 


withered  palm,  which,  however,  as  instinctively- 
closed  over  the  goodly  coin,  till  the  sense  of 
want  and  the  sense  of  honor  were  happily 
harmonized  by  some  courteous  word  of  ex- 
planation. And  even  after  they  consented  to 
receive  the  gifts  of  individual  kindness,  it  was 
a  prime  point  of  honor  to  owe  nothing  to  pub- 
he  charity.  One  aged  female,  who  was  at  last 
entirely  supported  by  the  Rossdhu  family,  used 
to  place  five  pounds,  the  savings  of  a  frugal 
hfe,  beneath  her  pillow  every  night,  lest,  by 
any  possibility,  she  might  be  chargeable  to  the 
parish  for  the  expenses  of  her  funeral.  And 
another,  who  in  extremity  had  accepted  some 
relief  from  tlie  poor's  money,  by  her  latter  will 
provided  that  her  personal  property  should  be 
disposed  of  and  the  proceeds  refunded  to  the 
Session,  and  as  the  sale  of  her  effects  reahzed 
near  forty  shillings,  it  is  likely  that  in  her  case 
the  parish  was  no  great  loser.  But  grotesque 
as  might  be  the  occasional  manifestations  of 
this  spirit,  Lady  Colquhoun  respected  and  en- 
couraged it.  She  was  proud  to  know  that  her 
poor  neighbors  were  not  paupers,  and,  "  con- 
sidering their  case,"  she  bestirred  her  ingenuity 
how  to  relieve  their  wants,  and  save  their  in- 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQUHOUN.  89 

dependence.  Amongst  her  pensioners  was  an 
aged  and  pious  woman  who  formerly  had 
charge  of  the  poultry  at  Rossdhu.  Her  chief 
means  of  support  was  now  derived  from  a 
humble  class  of  lodgers,  and  the  produce  of  a 
cow,  the  keep  of  which,  along  with  her  cottage, 
she  had  rent-free.  She  was  also  installed  in 
the  guardianship-general  of  the  bee-hives,  a 
post  which  entitled  her  to  a  small  yearly  sti- 
pend, and  which  only  called  for  her  attention 
in  the  pleasant  hours  of  sunshine  and  summer. 
And  when,  at  last,  lingering  infirmities  left 
her  long  bed-ridden,  her  kind  benefactress  was 
constantly  resorting  to  her  cheerful  but  lowly 
chamber.  There  Lady  Colquhoun  confessed 
that  she  had  learned  many  a  lesson  of  grati- 
tude and  trust  in  God.  Her  joyful  tribulation 
and  patient  hope  were  a  visible  sermon  ;  and 
all  the  more  instructive  because  derived  from 
constant  communion  with  heaven.  Often 
when  her  visitor  would  draw  near  to  her  peace- 
ful bedside  and  ask,  "And  what  have  you 
been  doing,  Nelly?"  her  answer  would  be, 
"  My  leddy,  I've  been  wussin'."* 

One  day  Nelly's  cottage  was  full  of  smoke, 
*  Wishing,  i.  e.,  praying. 

8* 


90  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

and  on  her  entrance  Lady  Colquhoim  wag 
greeted  with  the  exclamation,  "  Eh,  my  leddy, 
ye  canna  come  in  here  for  the  reek,  siccan  a 
fine  leddy  as  you."  "  Hold  your  peace,  Nelly," 
was  the  answer ;  "  when  you  and  I  are  in  the 
grave,  if  any  person  takes  up  your  dust  in  one 
hand,  and  mine  in  the  other,  he  won't  be  able 
to  tell  which  was  the  lady."  But  amidst  all 
this  consciousness  of  the  common  humanity 
and  the  common  frailty,  there  was  an  obvious 
elevation  which  commanded  the  respect,  whilst 
it  did  not  lessen  the  affection  of  the  poorest. 
There  was  in  her  words  enough  of  fellow- 
feeling  to  assure  them  of  the  speaker's  friend- 
ship ;  but  there  was  also  that  in  her  aspect 
which  gave  to  these  words  the  enforcement  of 
a  superior  nature.  And,  surely,  that  is  the 
truest  grandeur  which,  even  if  station  were 
lost  or  unsuspected,  would  still  be  noble,  in 
virtue  of  its  own  refinement;  just  as  that  is 
the  truest  condescension  which  can  lay  aside 
everything  except  inherent  dignity.  So  grace- 
ful were  her  manners,  so  delicate  her  cultmed 
mind,  and  so  lofty  the  homestead  of  her  ha- 
bitual thoughts,  that,  though  she  could  forget 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  91 

or  conceal  the  accidents  of  rank,  she  could 
never  cease  to  be  the  Christian  gentlewoman. 
Walking  in  the  beautiful  grounds  of  Park- 
place,*  one  day  last  summer,  a  picturesque  cot- 
tage was  pointed  out  to  the  writer,  and  he  was 
told  how,  in  the  minds  of  some  of  the  family,  it 
was  associated  with  Lady  Colquhoun,  In  the 
course  of  her  first  visit,  they  were  sauntering 
through  the  pleasure-grounds,  when  they  came 
to  that  cottage,  and  she  was  asked  if  she  would 
like  to  go  in  and  see  the  aged  gardener,  then 
laid  on  his  dying  bed.  She  eagerly  assented, 
and,  after  talking  to  him  a  little  in  her  own 
sweet  and  engaging  way,  she  begged  her  friends 
to  continue  their  walk,  for  she  could  not  speak 
so  freely  whilst  they  were  present.  By  and  by 
she  joined  them,  radiant  with  that  happiness 
which  celestial  natures  feel  w^hen  visits  of  mercy 
have  been  paid  ;  and  as  the  old  man  continually 
reverted  to  that  interview,  and  the  prayer  with 
which  it  ended,  as  a  sort  of  angelic  epiphany 
in  his  homely  history,  we  may  hope  that  it  was 
blessed  to  liis  everlasting  benefit.     And  though 

*  The  seat  of  E.  Fuller  Maitland,  Esq.,  near  Heiiley-on- 
Thames.  One  of  Mr.  Fuller  Maitland's  daughters  was  mar- 
ried to  Lady  Colquhoun's  second  son. 


92  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

it  must  be  admitted  that  for  such  services  she 
possessed  a  rare  feUcity,  neither  should  it  be 
forgotten  that  of  that  fitness  the  main  element 
was  her  rare  benevolence.  Those  who  would 
fain  be  the  benefactors  of  their  brethren  possess 
the  -main  prerequisites  if  they  are  blessed  with 
warm  hearts,  and  clear  views  of  the  Gospel ; 
and  for  an  open  ear  and  a  welcome  they  need 
not  be  anxious,  if  into  the  abodes  of  their  neigh- 
bors they  carry  a  bosom  glowing  with  the  Sa- 
viour's heavenly  kindness. 

In  a  tract,  first  published  anonymously, 
Lady  Colquhoun  has  supplied  us  with  a  speci- 
men of  her  cottage  conversations  ;  and,  as  illus- 
trative of  herself  and  of  the  blessing  which 
sometimes  crowned  her  labors,  we  may  copy  a 
few  paragraphs : — 

"On  my  entrance  I  beheld  an  old  man 
stretched  upon  a  bed,  apparently  in  great  pain, 
whose  face  was  half  eaten  away  by  that  dread- 
ful disease,  a  cancer.  Yet  his  countenance 
bore  marks  of  intelligence,  and  of  that  cultiva- 
tion of  the  mind,  which,  even  among  the  lower 
orders,  is  so  common  in  Scotland.  His  features 
were  aquihne.  He  was  pale  and  emaciated, 
and  a  certain  wildness  in  his  stare  seemed  to 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLdUHOUN.  93 

announce  that  he  suffered  greatly.  The  bed 
on  which  he  lay  was  cased  round  with  wood, 
excepting  a  space  in  front,  by  which  to  enter. 
The  remaining  furniture  of  the  room  consisted 
of  another  bed,  a  few  wooden  chairs,  a  table, 
and  cupboard.  The  fire,  which  was  of  peat, 
burned  upon  the  ground,  without  grate  or 
chimney,  the  smoke  seeking  its  exit  through  a 
small  opening  in  the  roof,  which,  however, 
seldom  allowed  of  its  entire  escape.  And  a 
window,  oft  repaired,  but  dimly  admitted  the 
light  of  day.  Yet  this  uncomfortable  lodging, 
I  am  convinced,  made  no  part  of  the  misery  of 
my  new  acquaintances  ;  they  had  never  known 
a  better,  and  custom  had  completely  reconciled 
them  to  the  want  of  all  the  conveniences  of  life. 

"I  advanced  towards  the  poor  man,  and 
said, — 

" '  I  am  sorry  to  hear  you  are  so  unwell.' 

u  ( Yeiy  bad.'  was  his  reply. 

"  '  Are  you  in  great  pain  V 

"  '  Very  great.' 

"  '  Does  anything  give  you  relief?' 

"  '  Nothing.' 

" '  Are  you  always  equally  distressed  !' 

"  *  No ;  sometimes  the  pain  is  much  more  in- 


94  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

tolerable ;  I  could  not  speak  to  you  if  the  fit 
came  on  now  ;  but  I  shall  never,  never  be  better.' 

"  This  last  answer  reminded  me  of  the  hint 
his  wife  had  given  as  to  the  state  of  his  mind. 

"  '  It  is  a  consolation,'  said  I,  '  to  know  that 
trials  are  sent  for  our  benefit ;  and  this  one, 
hard  as  it  is  to  bear,  may  prove  a  great  blessing 
to  you.' 

" '  There  is  no  blessing  for  me,'  said  he, 
hastily ;  '  I  am  lost,  undone,  miserable  here, 
and  will  be  so,  forever.' 

"  As  I  gazed  upon  him,  I  saw  despair  pictured 
in  his  ghastly  and  disfigured  countenance. 

"  '  I  hope  you  are  mistaken,'  I  rephed.  '  Do 
you  not  know  that  there  is  a  Saviour  for  poor, 
lost,  undone  creatures  ?  that  he  is  able  to  save 
to  the  uttermost  all  who  come  unto  God  by 
him  ;  that  he  came  to  seek  and  to  save  that 
w^hich  was  lost :  and  that  he  will  in  no  wise 
cast  out  any  who  apply  to  him  for  salvation  V 

"  '  I  know  all  you  can  tell  me,'  said  John, '  foi 
I  am  well  acquainted  with  the  Bible  ;  but  1 
know  hkewise  that  there  is  no  salvation  for 
me.' 

"  '  Does  any  particular  sin  oppress  your  con- 
science ?'  I  inquired. 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN.  95 

" '  No,'  said  he,  '  I  have  Uved  a  rehgious  hfe. 
Unhke  many  of  my  neighbors,  I  have  kept  the 
Sabbath — prayed  morning  and  evening — ab- 
stained from  swearing — attended  on  ordinances 
— thought  I  was  serving  God  ;  but  lie  has  re- 
jected me ;  and  this  is  a  judgment  sent  from 
heaven  ;  it  is  the  beginning  of  those  pains  which 
will  last  eternally — it  is  hell  begun.' 

"  I  hstened  with  horror  as  he  spoke,  for,  from 
the  expression  of  his  countenance,  his  words, 
dreadful  as  they  were,  seemed  inadequate  to 
coi:«^ey  his  meaning." 

For  more  than  a  year  Lady  Colquhoun  con- 
tinued to  visit  assiduously  her  afflicted  neigh- 
bor without  seeing  any  break  in  the  gloomy 
cloud  with  which  his  soul  was  enveloped.  It 
was  on  a  day  when  a  grievous  accident  had 
befallen  his  grand-daughter,  who  was  the 
chief  support  of  himself  and  his  aged  partner, 
that  the  following  conversation  occurred  : — 

"'Is  it  not  a  judgment  now?'  said  he,  on 
seeing  me:  'would  stroke  upon  stroke  thus 
follow  me  if  I  was  not  abandoned  forever — lost 
— going  down  to  the  pit?  Oh,  the  bottomless 
pit !   it  has  a  chain  and  key  none  can  escape. 


96  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

To  be  tormented  day  and  night,  forever  and 
ever ! — ' 

"  He  would  have  proceeded,  but  I  interrupted 
him  by  saying,  '  You  have  forgotten  this  text, 
"Whom  the  Lord  loveth  he  chasteneth,  and 
scourgeth  every  son  whom  he  receiveth."  ' 

"  '  He  will  never  receive  me,'  was  the  reply. 

"  '  John,'  said  I,  '  you  certainly  labor  under 
an  unfortunate  delusion  ;  it  is  necessary  that  I 
should  examine  you  a  little  more  closely.  Are 
you  willing  to  accept  of  a  full  and  of  a  free  salva- 
tion? I  know  you  Avill  say  that  you  are  ;«but 
let  me  explain  the  meaning  of  these  expres- 
sions. 

"  'To  receive  a  free  salvation  means,  that 
you  accept  of  it  without  respect  to  anything  on 
your  part ;  that  your  past  life  has  nothing  to 
do  with  it,  and  that  even  your  future  life  can 
have  no  effect  in  justifying  you  in  the  sight  of 
God  ;  that  the  hfe  and  the  death  of  Christ  are 
your  only  grounds  of  hope ;  and  that  you  ex- 
pect an  eternity  of  happiness  from  him,  as  a  gift 
for  which  you  can  give  no  return. 

"  '  To  receive  a  full  salvation  means,  that 
you  are  willing  to  accept  of  the  whole  which 
Christ  offers,  salvation  from  the  power  of  sin 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  97 

dwelling  within  you,  as  well  as  from  hell. 
Jesus  came  to  save  his  people  fro?7i,  not  in  their 
sins.  Is  there,  then,  anything  which  you  know 
is  displeasing  to  God,  hut  which  you  are  un- 
willing to  give  up  ?  any  right  hand  you  would 
not  cut  off,  or  right  eye  you  would  not  pluck 
out?  Christ  addresses  you  as  he  did  tlie  man 
at  the  pool  of  Bethesda,  "  Wilt  thou  he  made 
whole  ?"  And  the  same  Divine  compassion  is 
ready  to  be  imparted  to  you  that  was  exerted 
in  his  case.  Any  obstacle  must  be  on  your 
side ;  Jor  the  Gospel  offers  are  without  limita- 
tion.' 

"  '  O,  God  bless  you  !  and  he  will  bless  you,' 
said  John. 

"  '  I  scarcely  know  any  blessing,'  I  replied, 
*  that  would  afford  me  more  satisfaction  than 
to  be  useful  to  you.  But  consider  what  I  have 
been  saying ;  are  you  willing  to  accept  of  the 
salvation  I  have  described  V 

"  '  Ask  a  man,'  he  answered,  '  on  the  rack, 
if  he  will  accept  of  relief;  he  cannot  feel  more 
anxious  to  obtain  it  than  I  am  for  an  interest 
in  Christ.  I  would  do  anything,  everything, 
to  know  that  I  am  liis,  and  he  mine.' 

"  '  Can  you  consent,'  said  I,  '  to  what  is  still 
9 


98  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

harder  to  our  proud  natures,  to  trust  in  nothing' 
that  you  ever  can,  do,  or  ever  have  done,  for 
justification  in  the  sigiit  of  God ;  to  let  Christ 
have  the  undivided  glory  ?  His  is  a  fiuished 
salvation  ;  our  part  is  to  accept  of  it.' 

''  '  Oh,  if  I  dared  to  hope  !'  said  John. 

"  '  And  why  not  V  I  answered.  '  Can  any 
invitations  be  more  universal  than  these,  which 
are  the  words  of  our  Lord  himself? — "Ask, 
and  ye  shall  receive ;  seek,  and  ye  shall  find ; 
knock,  and  it  shall  be  opened  to  you."  "  If  any 
man  thirst,  let  him  come  unto  me  and  drink." 
"Him  that  cometh  unto  me,  I  will  in  no  wise 
cast  out."  ' 

"  '  I  think  I  am  under  the  influence  of  temp- 
tation,' said  John,  '  for  I  cannot  hope.' 

"  *  No  doubt  you  are,'  I  replied  ;  '  but  pray  to 
Him  who  overcame  the  powers  of  darkness, 
and  suffered  being  tempted,  for  strength  to 
overcome  the  wdcked  one, — to  Him,  who  in  a 
sense  above  our  comprehension  could  say, 
"  Thou  shalt  not  tempt  the  Lord  thy  God."  I, 
too,  will  pray  for  you ;  and  I  feel  inclined  to 
trust  that  the  cloud  will  at  length  be  dispelled, 
and  the  Sun  of  Righteousness  yet  arise  upon 
your  soul,  with  heahng  under  his  wings.' 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQUIIOUN.  09 

"' Never  was  any  one  tliiis  iiUciestctl  for  my 
salvation,'  said  the  old  man. 

"  'Ah  !  John,'  said  I,  '  there  is  One  who  lias 
shown  himself  infinitely  more  interested  for 
your  salvation.  If  laying-  aside  for  a  season 
the  glories  of  divinity,  living  a  life  of  persecu- 
tion and  distress,  and  dying  a  death  of  extreme 
anguish,  both  of  soul  and  body,  can  prove  it, 
the  Son  of  God  feels  a  solicitude  to  plucic  sin- 
ners as  brands  out  of  the  burning,  to  which  no 
created  being,  in  heaven  or  earth,  is  alive. 
And  yet  you  fear  to  trust  him.' 

"  Tears  gushed  from  the  hollow  eyes  of  poor 
John  ;  he  evidently  felt  the  conclusiveness  of 
my  argument,  and  the  impossibilily  of  reply. 
His  countenance  brightened — it  spoke  volumes  ; 
but  he  uttered  not  a  word.  He  appeared  for 
some  time  silently  to  feed  upon  the  ray  of  hope 
which  had  imperceptibly  entered  his  beniglited 
mind;  he  seemed  scarcely  himself  to  credit 
that  he  entertained  it,  and  yet  afraid  to  lose  the 
first  dawning  of  joy,  to  which  lie  hid  <n  long 
been  a  strang-er, 

"Oh,  blessed  Spirit!  (I  mrntaiiy  prayed) 
enlighten  his  darkeni^d  soul,  irraxhale  it  with 
thy  bright  beams,  purify  it  by  thy  benign  inllu- 


100  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

ence ;  lead  him  to  Jesus,  teach  him  how  uni- 
versal are  the  offers  of  thy  Word,  and  at  length 
may  he  find  peace  and  rest  in  thine  everlasting 
arms."* 

The  day  had  now  dawned,  and  soon  the 
remaining  shadows  lied  away  ;  and  it  was  the 
privilege  of  his  kind  instructress  to  know  that 
his  last  days  were  irradiated  with  a  joy  un- 
speakable and  full  of  glory. 

It  was  not  till  a  later  period  that  she  was 
much  in  the  habit  of  visiting  the  poor  of  Edin- 
burgh ;  but  there  was  one  forlorn  invalid  there 
in  whose  case  she  felt  much  interested.  Bell 
Macintyre  had  been  a  housemaid  at  Rossdhu, 
and  was  then  a  good-looking  and  a  very 
thoughtless  girl.  From  Rossdhu  she  removed 
to  a  family  near  Edinburgh,  and  was  glad  to 
find  herself  in  that  gay  neighborhood  ;  but  in 
consequence  of  having  swallowed  a  needle,  she 
was  seized  with  an  internal  affection,  acute 
and  lingering,  and  was  never  fit  for  service  any 
more.  Her  terrible  suffering  was  aggravated 
by  extreme  penury  ;  and  hearing  that  her  first 
kind  mistress  was  in  town,  she  sent  her  a  mes- 
sage, which  soon  brought  her  to  the  poverty- 
*  "  Despaii-  and  Hope."     By  Lady  Colquhoun. 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQUIIOUN.  101 

Stricken  chamber.  But  Lady  Colciulioiiu  was 
not  more  struck  l)y  the  sad  alteration  in  her 
old  servant's  outward  lot,  than  delighted  with 
the  manifest  change  in  her  character.  In  soH- 
tude  and  often  in  great  agony,  the  Gospel  was 
now  her  constant  support;  and,  aided  by  a 
remarkable  memory,  she  could  re;-eat  many 
long  poitions  of  Scripture,  and  turn  to  ahuost 
any  passage,  chapter  and  verse.  Even  accom- 
panied by  a  servant,  it  needed  some  resolution 
to  dive  into  the  close^  and  climb  the  high  and 
dirty  stair  at  the  top  of  whicli  15ell  usually 
lodged;  but  even  into  these  repulsive  al)odes 
Lady  Cokiuhoun  was  glad  to  find  that  philan- 
thropy could  penetrate.  One  day,  whilst  she 
was  seated  by  Bell's  bed-side,  two  young  ladies 
entered,  smiled,  placed  sixpence  on  the  table, 
and  instantly  withdrew.  The  sixpence  was 
the  weekly  gift  of  the  "  Destitute  Sick  Society ;" 
the  young  ladies  were  its  visitors  ;  and  their 
coming  was  a  gleam  of  sunshine  to  which  the 
poor  sulTerer  could  always  look  forward  in  her 
loneliness.  And  though  Bell  could  never  as- 
certain their  names,  for  some  tiuie  a  young 
oflicer  and  his  wife  came  daily  from  the  Castle, 
and   brought  their  sick  neighbor   her  dinner 


102  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

usually  some  delicacy  in  a  covered  dish,  and 
waited  till  she  ate  it.  But  is  it  worth  while  to 
chronicle  these  little  charities?  It  is  worth 
while,  inasmuch  as  Lady  Colquhoun  delighted 
to  recount  the  kind  deeds  of  other  people.  It 
is  worth  while,  inasmuch  as  the  dainty  dish 
carried  to  the  pain-worn  prisoner  may  be  noted 
in  that  Book  where  even  tlie  cup  of  cold  water 
is  recorded.  And  inasmuch  as  little  charities, 
done  in  the  Redeemer's  name,  are  twigs  of 
healing  in  the  Marah  of  humanity, — balm- 
drops  on  poverty's  broken  heart, — it  will  be 
worth  while,  dear  reader,  if  you  and  the  writer 
go  and  do  likewise.  Bell  had  an  only  brother; 
he  was  a  private  in  the  forty-second  Highland- 
ers, and  did  not  know  of  her  distress.  But  as 
his  detachment  was  under  orders  for  Scotland, 
he  sent  his  sister  five  pounds,  that  she  might 
look  smart  and  respectable  when  he  arrived 
with  his  regiment.  The  letter  was  also  ac- 
companied with  a  present  of  his  old  military 
great-coat.  AVhen,  at  last,  he  arrived,  he  found 
her  in  a  miserable  lodging,  and  sitting  up  in 
bed,  with  his  old  great-coat  wrapped  round  her. 
As  long  as  he  was  quartered  at  the  Castle  he 
was  very  attentive  to  his  sister ;  but  he  was 


LIFE    OF    LAUY    COLQUIIOUN.  103 

soon  sent  abroad  on  foicign  service,  and  Hell 
heard  no  more  of  liini  till  tidings  of  his  death 
were  brought  to  her,  accompanied  by  his  watch 
and  Waterloo  medal.  The  watch  was  a  great 
comfort  during  the  solitary  days  and  nights  of 
many  successive  years. 

Every  year  on  the  estate  of  Luss  an  oak 
coppice  or  "  hag,"  is  felled,  and  in  cutting  it 
hundreds  of  laborers  are  employed  during  a 
portion  of  each  sunnner.  These  congregate 
from  all  quarters,  many  of  them  being  natives 
of  the  sister  isle.  And  this,  as  well  as  the 
harvest-season,  was  an  opportunity  which  liady 
Colquhoim  always  improved  for  distributing 
tracts.  Through  the  overseer,  something  could 
usually  be  ascertained  regarding  the  previous 
histor}^  and  character  of  each,  and  in  this  way 
he  was  presented  with  a  word  in  season.  The 
tracts  were  always  received  with  avidity,  and, 
besides  being  read  on  the  Sabbath,  they  ^^  ere 
usuahy  carried  away,  perhaps  to  do  good  in 
distant  places. 

The  Southern  reader  may  have  some  difTi- 
culty  in  realizing  such  a  state  of  matters ;  but 
many  of  our  northern  countrymen  can  still 
recall  the  period  when  the  parish  schools  of 


104  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

Scotland  comprehended  the  entire  population, 
Partiall}'^  endowed  by  the  landed  proprietors,  it 
was  their  boast  that  they  offered  an  education 
so  thorough  that  the  opulent  did  not  disdain  it; 
but  withal  so  cheap,  that  the  poorest  could 
easily  command  it.  Accordingly,  with  the  ex- 
ception of  the  principal  gentry,  who  could 
afford  a  tutor,  and  the  gipsies,  to  whose  crepus- 
cular habits  day-schools  were  not  congenial, 
the  juvenility  of  the  district  all  mustered  at 
the  same  seat  of  learning,  and  in  its  play- 
ground the  sons  of  farmers  and  weavers  and 
ploughmen,  the  minister's  laddie,  and  the  bell- 
man's heir-apparent,  all  kept  their  daily  Satur- 
nalia. Nor  did  any  mischief  result  from  this 
blending  of  various  classes.  Its  chief  tendency 
was  to  lay  the  foundation  of  a  cordial  and 
friendly  feeling  through  subsequent  life.  And 
not  only  was  this  education  unconscious  of 
caste ;  it  was  catholic.  Although  intensely 
scriptural,  within  Presbyterian  limits,  at  least, 
it  was  thoroughly  unsectarian.  The  scholars 
were  mighty  in  the  Proverbs,  and  marvellous  in 
the  "  proofs ;"  but  we  never  heard  of  a  parish 
schoolmaster  so  misguided  as  to  tamper  with  a 
denominational   "  testimony,"   or  who  taught 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQUHOUN.  105 

young  ideas  to  shoot  in  any  ecclesiastical 
direction  ;  but,  sitting  at  his  feet,  little  Church- 
men and  incipient  Dissenters  were  closely 
united  in  catechetical  alhance.  And  to  crown 
this  comprehension,  brotiiers  and  sisters  went 
to  school  together,  learned  the  same  lessons, 
and  competed  for  the  same  prizes ;  so  that 
traditions  run  of  great  authors,  who,  in  their 
second  lustrum,  yielded  the  ''writing  medal" 
to  some  little  dairy-maid  ;  and  more  romantic 
traditions  of  undeveloped  East  India  directors, 
who  vainly  strove  for  arithmetical  precedence 
with  the  future  Lady  Mayoress. 

But  although  this  system  savored  of  patri- 
archal simplicity,  and  tended  to  diffuse  throuirh 
the  countryside  a  notaljle  sense  of  neighbor- 
hood, it  was  not  without  its  drawbacks,  and 
there  w^as  one  wliich,  in  her  domicihary  visits, 
especially  forced  itself  on  Lady  Colquhoun. 
She  was  sorry  to  remark  the  absence  of  neat 
arrangement  and  thrifty  housekeeping  in  the 
surrounding  cottages  ;  and  she  felt  that  noth- 
ing effectual  could  be  done  forthe  in-door  com- 
fort of  her  neighbors  till  a  girls'  school  was 
established.  Opportunely  for  her  object,  a 
neat  cottage,   not  far  from  Rossdhu,  was  acci- 


106  LIFE    OP    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

dentally  burned  to  the  ground,  and  the  occu- 
pants being  provided  with  another  abode,  at 
considerable  expense  Lady  Colquhoun  rebuilt 
it,  and  fitted  it  up  as  a  school-house.  Neatly 
fenced,  and  the  enclosure  laid  out  in  shrub- 
bery, it  became  the  type  of  that  new  order  of 
things  which  she  sought  to  introduce  ;  and,  at- 
tracted by  a  splendid  fuschsia,  which  nearly 
covered  one  gable,  strangers  and  tourists  often 
turned  aside  to  visit  the  school.  A  suitable 
teacher  was  selected,  and  w^as  sent  to  Edin- 
burgh to  perfect  herself  in  needlework,  and  to 
learn  the  most  approved  methods  of  teaching. 
Lady  Colquhoun  herself  visited  the  school  al- 
most daily,  and  the  severest  penalty  for  miscon- 
duct was  exclusion  from  the  class  which  her 
Ladyship  conducted.  A  striking  improvement 
was  soon  perceptible  in  the  district,  and  whilst 
the  most  casual  observer  could  mark  the  soft- 
ened manners  and  pleasing  appearance  of  the 
scholars,  the  parents  began  to  acknowledge 
their  own  advantage.  Hitherto,  so  little  had 
the  manual  arts  interfered  with  the  abstract 
sciences  in  the  education  of  their  daughters, 
that  few  of  them  w^ere  able  to  sew,  and  conse- 
quently  for    the   most   rudimental   essays   in 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLGlUHOUN.  107 

dressmaking  they  were  obliged  to  call  in  pro- 
fessional assistance.  It  was,  therefore,  a  great 
surprise  and  satisfaction  when  they  found  that 
they  had  sempstresses  nearly  as  accomplished 
in  their  own  abodes. 

Of  course  w^ith  the  day-school  was  associated 
a  Sabbath-school.  To  Lady  Colquhoun  her 
class  became  an  objeet  of  ever-deepening  in- 
terest, and  by  studying  appropriate  passages, 
and  searching  for  memorable  anecdotes  and  il- 
lustrations, she  successfully  labored  to  make  it 
attractive  to  her  pupils.  As  a  teacher  she  had 
many  advantages.  Her  voice  was  sweet  and 
well-modulated,  her  countenance  benevolent, 
and  her  whole  manner  was  full  of  engaging 
earnestness  ;  so  that  she  gained  entire  ascend- 
ency over  her  scholars,  and  by  the  accounts 
which  they  received  of  her  proceedings,  many 
of  the  parents  were  also  induced  to  attend. 

And  she  was  not  content  with  mere  doc- 
trinal instructions.  She  warned  her  youthful 
hearers  against  the  sins  to  which  they  were  ac- 
tually exposed.  And  in  many  instances  these 
affectionate  persuasions  succeeded.  There 
was  one  bad  custom  in  the  West  of  Scotland 
at  which  she  was  especially  grieved.     It  was 


108  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQUHOUN. 

the  people's  habit,  after  a  marriage,  a  baptism, 
or  a  funeral,  at  the  close  of  public  worship,  to 
invite  their  friends  to  the  tavern,  and  there 
they  regaled  tliem  with  ardent  spirits.  Against 
this  desecration  of  the  Lord's-day  Lady  Colqu- 
houn  set  herself  with  all  her  might,  and  often 
alluded  to  it  in  her  class.  Her  remonstrances 
were  not  without  effect.  Inveterate  as  the 
custom  was,  at  the  time  of  their  own  marriage 
some  of  her  former  scholars  had  courage  to  set 
it  at  nought,  though  others  yielded  ;  and  it  is 
to  be  feared  that  nothing  except  the  spread  of 
intelligence  and  piety  will  extirpate  the  dis- 
graceful usage. 

However,  it  is  time  that  we  allow  the  reader 
to  return  to  that  Journal  in  which  Lady  Col- 
quhoun  has  undesignedly  preserved  her  auto- 
biograph}^ 

"  Saturday,  July  18,  1818  {before  the  Com- 
munion).— In  the  time  of  worship  there  was 
an  awful  thunder-storm.  How  easily  could 
God  crush  us  worms  !  How  shall  we  stand  in 
that  day  when  He  shall  be  revealed  in  flaminor 
fire?  And  how  can  any  endure  unless  covered 
with  the  robe  Himself  hath  wrought?    Blessed 


LIFE    OF    LA.DY    COLaUHOUN.  109 

Jesus !  though  most  unworthy,  I  feel  a  con- 
fidence that  I  am  complete  in  thee. 

"  Monday^  20  (after  the  Co7nmunion). — Mr. 
Gregor  preached  on  1  Thess.  iv.  13,  14, — to 
me  a  most  affecting  subject.  I  never  was  so 
overcome  in  church  before.  Every  word  pic- 
tured my  dear,  dear  saint  to  my  imagination. 
Many  a  pang  do  I  feel  when  I  think  of  her. 
Yes,  my  Hannah,  I  cannot  easily  give  thee 
up.  Oh,  that  name  !  How  many  times  have 
I  uttered  it  with  dehght ;  and  often  now  do  I 
repeat  it, — sweety  sioeet  Hannah  !  Dr.  and 
Mrs.  Buchanan  were  at  church,  and  dined  at 
the  Manse,  returning  with  us  in  the  evening. 

"  Aug.  16. — My  spirits  for  this  Httle  while 
have  been  low,  I  can  hardly  say  whether  from 
my  recent  loss  or  not ;  but  the  world  appears 
dead  to  me,  and  my  heavenly  hopes  less  lively 
than  within  the  last  few  weeks  they  were.  I 
can  hardly  realize  the  thought  of  joy,  even  in 
heaven.  Still,  my  beloved  Lord  lives,  and  my 
life  is  hid  with  him  in  God.  Thinking  of  God 
is  the  only  refreshment  I  experience. 

"  Sept.  13. — This  morning  was  much  en- 
livened by  Isaiah  li.  11, — 'Therefore  the  re- 
deemed of  the  Lord  shall  return,  and  come 
10 


110  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQUHOUN. 

with  singing  unto  Zion ;  and  eveilasting  joy 
shall  be  upon  their  head:  they  shall  obtain 
gladness  and  joy;  and  sorrow  and  mourning 
shall  flee  away.'  Why  have  the  redeemed  this 
joy?  It  is  because  they  'obtain'  it  from  God. 
Oh,  the  perfect,  the  everlasting  joy  to  which 
they  are  introduced!  May  the  thought  of  it 
make  the  trials  of  hfe  sit  lightly  !  Methinks, 
could  I  always  view  the  promised  land,  even 
through  ever  so  thick  a  veil,  these  crosses 
would  not  be  weighty. 

"  Nov.  1. — Once  more,  within  these  few 
days,  I  have  endeavored  to  do  every  action 
only  as  I  think  God  would  have  me.  I  have 
tried  to  ask  myself,  Is  this  what  God  at  this 
time  would  desire  me  to  do  ? 

"  Wednesday,  Dec.  2. — Attended  another 
meetino:  of  the  Luss  and  Arrochar  Bible  So- 
ciety.  It  flourishes  beyond  my  hopes.  Nearly 
30Z.  have  been  collected ;  and  though  there 
were  not  many  present,  there  were  more  than 
formerly,  and  they  seemed  to  enter  into  the 
spirit  of  it.  All  the  office-bearers  spoke;  Sir 
James  twice,  and  he  affected  me  much,  in  par- 
ticular when  alluding  to  our  Lord's  question  to 
Peter,  'Lovest  thou  me?'     What  could  I  have 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  Ill 

answered  had  it  been  addressed  to  me  ? 
Strange,  that  in  this  I  can  never  be  decided  ; 
but  if  a  desire  to  feed  his  sheep  be  a  sign,  of 
that  I  am  confident.  Oh,  prosper,  Lord,  the 
means  of  spreading  thy  Gospel!  'Let  the 
people  praise  thee;  let  all  the  people  praise 
thee.  Amen,  and  amen.  Then  shall  the 
earth  yield  her  increase,  and  God,  even  our 
own  God,  shall  bless  us  !' 

"  March  28,  1819.— This  day  is  memorable 
from  two  interesting  conversations  ;  one  with 
a  dear  friend,  another  with  a  servant,  to  whom, 
along  with  the  rest,  I  had  given  tracts.  Oh, 
for  a  blessing  on  my  poor  feeble  endeavors ! 

"  May  9. — Read  in  Scott's  Commentary  and 
a  French  Bible.  One  passage  in  the  latter 
(John  xvii.  24)  delighted  my  heart.  It  strikes 
me  as  more  impressive  than  the  English, — 
'Pere,  mo7i  desir  est  touchant  ceux  que  tu 
m'as  donnes,  que  la  ou  je  suis,  ils  y  soient 
aussi  avec  moi.'  Is  this  the  desire  of  my 
Lord  ?  How  much  more  should  I  desire  to  be 
ivith  him^  and  where  he  is  ?  And  why,  sweet 
Jesus,  dost  thou  desire  to  have  me  with  thee  ? 
From  love  it  must  be — everlasting  love !  From 
a  delight,    too,  in   the   fruits   of  redemption; 


112  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQUHOUN. 

from  seeing  the  travail  of  thy  soul ;  from  the 
satisfaction  of  beholding  pollution  pure.  And, 
doubtless,  from  the  beneficent  delight  of  carry- 
ing forward  the  saints,  even  in  glory,  to  higher 
degrees  of  nearness  to  God,  of  holiness,  of 
happiness. 

"  May  23. — 'Tis  now  a  year  since  my  be- 
loved sister  has,  I  trust,  been  in  glory.  How 
differently  has  it  been  spent  from  all  her  other 
years !  How  contemptuously,  perhaps,  how 
wonderingly  does  she  look  down  on  the  many 
earthly  things  which  might  once  have  agitated 
the  mind  !  How  pure  are  her  thoughts  !  how 
delightful  the  taste  she  has  got  of  seraphic 
employments  and  entertainments !  and  how 
overjoying  the  thought  that  they  shall  never, 
never  end  !  Oh,  that  we  poor  earthly  pilgrims 
could  realize  something  of  such  scenes,  and 
rejoice  in  the  hope  of  the  glory  of  God ! 

'^  June  20. — Yesterday  my  father  in  Christy 
worthy  Dr.  Buchanan,  arrived  here,  and  to-day 
he  preached  to  us  from  1  John  i.  7.  It  was  a 
short  but  comprehensive  compendium  of  the 
Gospel.  Was  happy  in  hearing  him,  and  also 
much  struck  with  his  heavenly  temper  and 
child-like    confidence   in  God,  combined   with 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  113 

the  largest  charity.  How  rare  are  such  graces 
even  in  Christians  !  Had  a  long  and  interest- 
ins:  conversation  wnth  him.  Amon^  other 
tilings,  he  exhorted  me  never  to  let  slip  an 
opportunity  of  declaring  my  sentiments  and 
endeavoring  to  do  good,  even  to  strangers.  He 
also  related  several  instances  where  ejaculatory 
prayer  had  been  remarkably  answered,  and 
recommended  its  frequent  use. 

"  27. — I  was  struck  with  the  trustfulness,  I 
might  say  assurance,  of  Dr.  Buchanan  in 
prayer;  and  recollecting  how  much  in  every 
page  of  the  Bible  it  is  warranted  to  the  believer 
in  Jesus,  I  resolved  to  dismiss  my  childish  fears, 
and  trust  in  God  as  mine  for  evermore.  It  is 
wonderful  what  an  influence  this  belief  has  on 
the  heart,  and  how  it  prepares  for  the  practice 
of  those  graces  which  appear  so  beautiful  in 
Dr.  Buchanan.  Gave  Boston's  "Four-fold 
State"  to  the  servants  as  part  of  their  little 
library. 

"  July  25. — Afterwards  heard  my  children — 
all  my  children  ;  and,  I  tremble  to  write  it,  our 
little  circle  may  never  again  meet  in  such  cir- 
cumstances. My  beloved  J.  and  J.  leave  us 
this  week  for  Mr.  Grainger's  academy  in  Lin- 
10* 


114  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

colnsliire,  and  if  I  am  spared  to  see  it,  when 
they  return  they  may  be  beyond  this  mode  of 
instruction.  Tiie  precious  moments  are  gone 
when  a  mother's  warning  voice  might  be  heard 
witli  most  effect.  I  have,  indeed,  this  happy 
assurance,  that  if  I  could  in  any  way  have  led 
my  lambs  to  Clirist,  joyfully  would  I  have  done 
so  ;  and  that  this  was  my  first,  and  ahnost  only 
ambition  for  them.  And  now  would  I  commend 
them  to  God,  and  to  the  Word  of  his  grace,  which 
is  able  to  build  them  up,  and  to  give  them  an 
inheritance  among  them  which  are  sanctified. 
Read  to  them  Acts  xx. 

"  Sept.  19. — Am  at  this  time  happily  situated 
in  the  society  of  my  Lord's  dear  children,  dear 
to  him  and  dear  to  me.  Mr.  Legh  Richmond, 
who  has  been  honored  to  do  so  much  good  by 
his  beautiful  little  tracts,  came  here  last  night, 
accompanied  by  one  of  his  daughters,  and 
another  clergyman,  Mr.  Westoby.  They  came 
in  answer  to  prayer ;  my  Lord  has  been  load- 
ing me  with  benefits.  Oh,  how  I  love  the  fruits 
of  the  Spirit !  there  is  nothing  on  earth  can  at- 
tract my  regard  half  so  much.  With  joy  I  be- 
held the  image  of  my  Lord  shining  brightly, 
and  prayed  fervently  that  these  beauties  may 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  115 

not  only  appear,  but  may  flourish  and  abound 
in  my  whole  life.  Oh,  that  others  might  clearly 
discern  that  I  had  been  with  Jesus  !  At  present 
I  feel  much  encouraged  and  elevated.  God  is 
near.  Have  had  some  little  trials,  and  do  think 
I  acted  with  regard  to  them  as  he  would  have 
me ;  and  by  prayer,  and  by  trusting  in  him 
alone^  all  was  ordered  for  the  very  best. 

"  Nov.  28. — Last  week  I  was  reading  the 
Life  of  Mrs.  Ehzabeth  Hamilton.  She  seems 
to  have  been  amiable,  and  religiously  inclined ; 
but  oh,  I  pity  the  person,  of  whatever  talents 
possessed,  who  is  not  humbled  at  the  foot  of  the 
Cross  ;  and  this,  I  fear,  she  was  not.  She  talks 
of  the  greatest  enjoyment  in  this  life  as  being 
the  society  of  persons  of  genius.  Ah  no  !  she 
knew  not  that  other  happiness,  communion  with 
God  and  his  people.  She  speaks  in  raptures  of 
Mr.  Alison's  Sermon  on  the  Talents,  where  he 
distinctly  assigns  a  reward  to  the  use  w^e  make 
of  our  intellectual  powers,  &c.  A  reward  !  For 
our  services  !  It  must  be  of  grace,  not  of  debt. 
But  these  things  are  often  hid  from  the  wise 
and  prudent,  and  revealed  to  babes.  Dazzling 
genius,  how  little  canst  thou  do  for  thy  pos- 
sessor ! 


116  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

"  Edinburgh,  March  12, 1820.— In  the  even- 
ing I  had  my  children  and  read  the  Life  of 
Pearce.  When  reading  the  hves  of  eminent 
Christians,  I  am  pleased,  but  humbled.  '  Less 
than  the  least  of  all  saints,'  should  be  my  motto. 
Without  any  aifectation  of  humility,  or  the  least 
intention  of  writing  what  is  not  strictly  true,  I 
see  a  very  great  disparity  between  the  experi- 
ence I  read  of,  and  what  I  feel.  When  be- 
lievers complain,  and  mention  how  easily  they 
yield  to  temptation,  &c.,  I  can  say.  This  is  my 
case  ;  but  when  they  speak  of  their  joys,  their 
raptures,  their  willingness  to  do,  to  be,  or  to 
suffer  anything  for  Christ,  their  great  love  to 
him,  &c.,  my  hands  hang  down,  and  I  can  only 
exclaim.  Oh,  that  it  were  thus  with  me  !  Yet 
will  I,  too,  hope  in  the  Lord  my  righteousness. 
Let  me  be  content  to  sit  down  in  the  lowest 
room,  for  so  has  he  appointed. 

''Rossdhu,  Aug.  20,  1820.— My  brother 
Alexander  and  sister  Catherine  are  here.  C.  is 
to  remain  for  some  months.  I  prayed  to  be 
permitted  to  benefit  her.  What  real  delight  it 
w^ould  give  me!  She  gave  me  to-day  the 
manuscript  of  my  Hannah's  'Letter,'  which  I 
read  over  this  forenoon,  and  could  have  thought 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  117 

I  was  conversing  with  my  earliest  friend.  It 
is,  indeed,  a  wonderful  production,  and  has 
scarcely  any  corrections  for  the  press.  This 
forenoon  I  also  read  the  first  portion  of  my 
Diary,  and  was  struck  with  the  struggle  against 
sin  which  appears  in  it  ;  was  comforted  by  ob- 
serving it,  but  almost  fearful  that  my  watchful- 
ness is  not  so  great  now.  I  do,  however,  think 
that  I  have  attained  to  an  easier  victory  over 
some  sins,  especially  anger.  Resolved  and 
prayed  to  be  enabled  to  scrutinize  my  heart 
and  life,  more  as  a  Christian  ought ;  to  pass  no 
fault  unnoticed,  to  consider  no  evil  trifling. 
Spent  this  evening  in  reading  and  hearing  C 
read. 

'■^Nov.  12. — After  dinner  read  in  Romaine's 
'  Walk  of  Faith.'  He  says  tliat  it  is  impossible 
to  love  God  for  his  holiness,  without  loving 
him  as  our  reconciled  Father.  To  myself  it 
appears  that  I  have  done  so ;  that  the  loveli- 
ness of  his  character  was  a  great  means  of 
leading  me  to  Christ.  But  probably  I  know 
not  my  own  heart ;  at  least,  I  would  with  diffi- 
dence contradict  so  great  a  writer. 

''  Roijal  Hotel  Edinburgh,  Jan.  28,  1821.-^ 
I  should  be  ashamed  that  any  one  of  my  fel- 


118  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN, 

low-Chiistians  beard  my  prayers,  or  knew  how 
cold  and  indifferent  they  usually  are.  And 
yet  it  truly  does  astonish  me  ;  God  hears  them. 
In  very  many  instances  they  have  been  an- 
swered, and  I  hardly  know  an  instance  in 
which  the  rest  may  not  be  answered  yet.  I 
must  indeed  remember  that  it  is  thi^oiisrh 
Christy  and  I  hope  I  feel  that  I  have  no  other 
plea  for  acceptance.  When  begging  for  any 
blessing  with  a  cold  heart,  I  used  to  think, 
This  prayer  I  cannot  expect  to  be  heard ;  but 
now  I  can  trust,  wonderful  as  it  is,  that  this 
lifeless  petition  will  find  acceptance  before  the 
Throne.  Often  have  my  prayers  been  brought 
to  my  remembrance  by  their  fulfilment. 

''Feb.  11.— Heard  Dr.  Stewart  of  the  Can- 
ongate.  whom  I  have  not  heard  since  he  was 
settled  here.  Was  much  interested  in  the  ser- 
mon, and  in  the  preacher,  who  is  in  very  deli- 
cate health.  May  God  spare  and  bless  his  de- 
voted servant !" 

In  the  firmament  of  our  Northern  Church 
few  names  shine  brighter  than  that  of  Dr. 
Alexander  Stewart.  Born  in  the  Manse  of 
Blair,  and  spending  his  boyhood  amidst  such 


\ 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaTJHOUN.  119 

romantic  scenes  as  the  Pass  of  Killicrankie,  he 
received  an  early  tincture  of  that  enthusiasm 
and  poetic  fervor  which  make  the  Highlanders 
sublime  ;  and  then,  after  a  brilliant  career  in 
St.  Andrew's  University,  by  ducal  patronage 
he  was  softly  deposited  in  the  Manse  of  Moulin. 
Just  emerged  from  minority,  and  radiant  with 
life  and  hope,  he  could  scarcely  credit  the  rare 
felicity  which  had  landed  him  in  this  goodly 
preferment,  all  unconscious  of  the  probationer's 
usual  fears  and  perils.  The  Living  was  am- 
ple, the  scenery  delectable,  the  very  congrega- 
tion was  picturesque  ;  and  in  the  quiet  of  a 
Scottish  parsonage  he  could  pursue  those  clas- 
sical studies  to  which  he  was  powerfully  at- 
tracted, as  in  the  society  of  an  hospitable 
neighborhood  he  could  recreate  his  spirit  with 
the  mirth  or  the  nmsic  in  which  he  equally  ex- 
celled. But  all  this  while  his  heart  was  so 
little  in  his  sacred  calling  that  it  was  a  great 
relief  when  few  people  came  to  his  catechetical 
meetings,  and  from  the  most  solemn  engage- 
ments he  hurried  away  to  the  dance  or  the 
novel.  However,  it  was  his  great  happiness 
to  have  for  his  friend  a  minister  so  enlightened 
and  fervent  as  Mr.  Black  of  St.  Madoes.     Im- 


120  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

pressed  by  his   holy  example,  Mr.  Stewart  be- 
gan to  take  more  serious  views  of  the  pastoral 
office,  and  longed  to  possess  that  piety  which 
so   beautified  his   neighbor's  character  and  so 
delightfully  inspired  his  labors.     An  affection- 
ate intercourse  commenced,  and    Mr.  Black's 
letters  and  conversations  had  fully  instructed 
in  the  way  of  God  this  young  ApoUos,  when, 
in  June  of  1796,  Mr.  Simeon  paid  a  short  visit 
toMouHn.     Sufficient  knowledge  and  an  evan- 
gehcal  bias  he  had  already  received,  and  the 
vivid  words  of  his  guest  were  employed  by  the 
Spirit  of  God  to  impart  his  first  joyful  emotions. 
And  now  that  the   gracious   principle,  slowly 
elaborated  but  hitherto  invisible,  had  received 
the  spark  celestial,  it  blazed  up,  a  burning  and 
a  shining  light.     The  conversion  of  Mr.  Stew- 
art w^as  followed  by  a  remarkable  awakening 
amongst  his  parishioners  ;  and  never  did  min- 
ister preach  more  powerfully  than  this  ardent 
evangelist,  never  did  hearers  listen  more  won- 
deringly  than  these  simple  mountaineers.     Its 
result  was  a  revival,  singular  as  occurring  in 
the  dullest  age  of  the  Scottish  Church,  and  of 
which   the   many  fruits  are  now  ripening  in 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN.  121 

places  as  remote  as  Cromarty  and  Calcutta.* 
After  a  translation  to  Dingwall,  Dr.  Stewart 
was  brought  for  the  last  months  of  his  life  to 
labor  in  Edinburgh.  His  earnest  and  richly- 
scriptural  sermons  derived  much  additional  im- 
pressiveness  from  liis  enfeebled  and  death- 
stricken  looks ;  and  during  her  remaining 
Sabbaths  in  town,  Lady  Colquhoun  continued 
to  wait  on  his  ministry  with  mournful  affec- 
tion. And  when,  next  year,  his  friend  Dr. 
Sieveright  published  his  Life,  it  became  her 
fav^orite  book  in  Christian  biography. 

"  March  18. — Oh,  with  what  words  of  grate- 
ful acknowledgment  shall  I  record  the  serious 
impression  I  have  observed  this  day  and  lately 
m  one  very  dear  to  me!  I  was  delighted  in 
conversation,  and  my  hopes  rise  almost  to  con- 
fidence. I  think,  and  wonder  at  my  prayer- 
hearing  God.  I  can  hardly  in  strong  enough 
terms  express  my  astonishment,  I  dare  not  say 
my  gratitude,  though  I  do  feel  grateful,  at  the 

*  Dr.  Duff,  at  Calcutta,  b  a  native  of  Moulin.  Dr.  Stew- 
art's eldest  son,  in  many  respects  the  most  remarkable 
preacher  in  Scotland,  lately  died  the  Minister  of  Cromarty. 

u 


122  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

numberless  answers  to  my  prayer  I  am  daily 
receiving.     Bless  the  Lord,  O  my  soul ! 

"  JRossdhu,  Ajnil  22. — Felt  much  interested 
in  a  plan  which  I  this  day  began, — reading 
aloud  and  explaining  Doddridge's  Rise  and 
Progress  to  two  of  my  maids,  Mrs.  B.  and 
G.  Have  long  thought  I  neglected  my  duty 
towards  them,  in  not  myself  explaining  to 
them  the  doctrines  of  the  Bible.  Want  of 
courage  was  the  hinderance ;  but  I  resolved  to 
begin  with  these  two,  who  have  been  very  long 
with  me. 

"  July  8. — Read  and  prayed  with  all  my 
children.  Since  the  return  of  my  sons  my 
heart  has  been  much  engaged  in  prayer  for 
them  all.  I  began  a  new  plan  with  them  to- 
day,— to  get  them  to  prove  the  various  doc- 
trines from  the  Bible  direct. 

"  15. — To  my  great  joy  heard  this  day  that 
Dr.  Chalmers  will  preach  at  Luss  in  Septem- 
ber. May  the  Spirit  of  God  bring  home  to  my 
heart  the  truths  he  so  forcibly  preaches  ! 

"  Aug.  5. — The  Sacrament  Sabbath  at  Ar- 
rochar,  and  Sir  James  has  gone  there.  May 
his  heart  be  prepared  according  to  the  prepara- 
tion of  the  sanctuary,  and  may  he  be  benefited ! 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUIIOUN.  123 

A  few  days  ago  I  received  Mr.  Legli  Rich- 
mond's Memoir  of  my  Hannah, — my  dear  Han- 
nah. The  dehneation  of  her  character  is  very 
complete  ;  she  loas  what  is  there  described.  I 
trust  a  blessing  will  attend  it,  and  it  gives  me 
pleasure  to  think  that  I  have  had  some  hand  in 
it.  In  many  parts  my  words  are  retained,  and 
I  may  thus  be  honored  to  be  useful  w^ithout  be- 
ing seen. 

"  Sept.  9. — My  God  is  gracious.  I  scarcely 
remember  to  have  been  favored  with  so  much 
of  the  society  of  His  people  as  at  present. 
remained  till  Tuesday,  and  was  succeed- 
ed by  Mr.  Legh  Richmond,  his  daughter,  &c., 
and  we  had  much  agreeable  and  spiritual  con- 
versation. Mr.  Hamilton  of  Strathblane  came 
here  yesterday,  and  preached  to-day.  He  is  a 
faithful  and  able  laborer  in  God's  vineyard.  I 
delight  in  the  saints,  the  excellent  of  the  earth, 
but  it  is  out  of  their  power  to  lead  me  to  God. 
The  best  society  will  not  do,  without  mucli  re- 
tirement. I  find  deficiency  in  all.  1  would 
listen  to  the  lesson,  which  1  ought  to  deduce 
from  these  observations,  to  '  cease  from  man  ; 
I  would  learn  to  look  forward  with  outstretclied 
affections,    to    uninterrupted  communion  with 


124  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

God, — my  God,  my  exceeding  joy, — and  to  in- 
tercourse with  the  blessed  without  any  mixture 
of  defect. 

"  >Sept.  16.— Again  would  I  confirm  what  I 
wrote  last  Sabbath  ;  it  is  deeply  impressed  upon 
my  mind.  Emptiness,  insufficiency,  is  in  the 
world,  and  in  the  world's  inhabitants,  and  is 
even  found  in  the  people  of  God.  Can  w^e  ex- 
pect spiritual  light  from  creatures  who  are  only 
in  the  dawn  of  their  spiritual  existence  ?  God 
ma]/  work,  and  often  does  work  by  them  ;  but 
when  disappointment  occurs  we  need  not  w^on- 
der.  Dr.  Chalmers  preached  here  to-day.  In 
the  pulpit  his  powers  are  certainly  great,  and  his 
reasoning  very  clear  ;  but  having  heard  that  he 
is  so  extraordinary,  I  was,  on  the  whole,  disap- 
pointed. Mr.  Simeon's  deep  devotion  and  beau- 
tiful style,  impressed  me  more.  Though  heard 
above  twenty  years  ago,  his  sermons  are  still 
written  on  my  heart.  Thanks,  Lord,  that  I 
ever  heard  them — that  these  affecting  ordi- 
nances were  afforded  to  me  when  I  so  much  re- 
quired them  !  By  the  remarks  now  made  on 
communion  with  the  saints  I  may  seem  to  con- 
tradict what  I  wrote  Sept.  19,  1819.  What  I 
mean  is  this — God  may  draw  near,  as  Jesu3 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN.  125 

drew  near  the  disciples  going  to  Enimaus,  and 
may  bless  intercourse  with  his  children  ;  and 
then  it  becomes  a  delightful  means  of  grace  :  but 
he  often  does  not,  to  disappoint  their  hopes,  and 
lead  them  from  the  streams  to  the  Fountain." 

This  extract  is  printed  for  the  sake  of  its  true 
and  important  rellections,  and  all  the  rather, 
because  these  are  connected  with  a  name  trans- 
cendant  amongst  modern  preachers,  and  to 
which  eventually  none  could  pay  more  cordial 
homage  than  Lady  Colqiihoun.  But  if  this  first 
sermon  did  not  fulfil  all  her  expectations,  per- 
haps it  was  for  a  reason  which,  had  she  known 
it  at  the  time,  would  have  only  made  him,  to 
her  pious  mind,  appear  more  noble.  His  text 
was,  "The  common  people  heard  him  gladly  ;" 
and,  as  was  his  wont  on  such  occasions,  he 
would  lay  aside  his  grand  originalities,  and  labor 
after  those  obvious  truths  which  common  peo- 
ple are  glad  to  hear.  The  doctor  always  ad- 
verted to  this  visit  with  peculiar  pleasure ; 
nor  must  we  forget  to  add  the  deliu^ht  which  it 
aflbrded  to  his  new  ac([iiiiiiitances  at  Rossdlui, 
from  the  boatman  who  rowed  liini  on  the  lake, 
and  the  little  girl  with  whom  he  played  at  bat- 

ir 


126  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

tledoor,  up  to  the  guests  whom  he  one  evening 
dazzled  with  an  astronomical  lecture,  convert- 
ing the  dinner-table  into  an  extempore  orrery, 
with  a  d'o3'ley  for  the  sun,  decanters  for  the 
planets,  and  glasses  for  the  moons.  To  Mr. 
Simeon's  clear  and  vivacious  sermons  Lady 
Colquhoun  had  been  deeply  indebted  at  the 
outset  of  her  Christian  course.  There  was  one 
particularly  to  which  she  often  adverted.  The 
text  was,  "  Ye  will  not  come  unto  me  that  ye 
might  have  life;"  and  after  reading  it  the 
preacher,  in  his  own  striking  and  peculiar  man- 
ner, exclaimed,  "  Life  ?  blessed  Lord  !  dost  thou 
offer  us  hfe?"  and  in  an  instant,  enchaining  the 
attention  of  his  auditory,  he  kept  it  solemnly 
rivetted  to  the  close  of  his  discourse. 

"  Nov.  18. — With  much  interest  read  and  ex- 
plained to  my  maids.  I  have  now  had  reso- 
lution to  take  them  all,  and  cannot  but  hope, 
from  their  apparent  attention,  that  some  benefit 
will  accrue  to  them. 

''Mmj  5,  1822.— This  Sabbath  the  influences 
of  the  blessed  Spirit  appear  to  me  more  sensi- 
ble and  sweet ;  genuine  religion  has  more  ex- 
ercised its  empire  over  my  soul.     I  have  lately 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLdUHOUN.  127 

been  deeply  humbled  on  account  of  heart  sin, 
and  last  night  in  meditation  had  some  realiz- 
ing views  of  the  necessity  of  salvation  by 
Christ,  and  of  his  fitness  to  be  a  Saviour. 
To-day,  in  the  morning  prayed  with  sincerity 
and  truth,  and  felt  interested  in  church.  Read 
three  times  aloud — to  my  young  people,  to  my 
maids,  and  again  at  night,  in  the  parlor.  Felt 
pleasure  in  all,  and  longed  and  prayed  for  some 
fruit  of  my  labor.  Took  a  walk  before  tea. 
and  spent  an  agreeable  half-hour  in  medita- 
tion. Went  to  the  family  burying-place,  and 
remembered  tliose  who  are  mouldering  there, 
one  of  whom  (Sir  James's  father)  1  had  inti- 
mately known.  Imagined  my  dear  husband 
and  myself  consigned  to  this  narrow  cell,  and 
tried  to  look  forward  to  the  resurrection,  and 
consider  what  alone  can  make  it  a  joyful  day 
to  me.  For  life  and  death  commended  myself 
to  my  Redeemer,  whose  protection  alone  can 
avail  in  the  solemn  scenes  through  which  I 
must  pass. 

"  June  3. — Was  led  to  remember  my  fel- 
low-worshippers at  Halkirk.  Their  new  pas- 
tor, Mr.  Munro,  who  has  got  the  church  from 
Sir  James,  so  much  to  the  satisfatction  of  the 


128  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

parish,  was  to  preach  there  for  the  first  time 
to-day.  May  the  Lord,  the  Spirit,  descend  on 
pastor  and  people  !" 

For  more  than  a  year  anterior  to  this  date 
the  heaUh  of  Lady  Colquhoun  had  been  very 
dehcate,  and  her  allusions  are  frequent  to  that 
event  which  the  most  skilful  physicians  told 
her  was  its  probable  issue.  In  the  prospect 
her  feehngs  were  calm,  humble,  and,  though 
solemn,  full  of  confidence  in  God. 

''  Oct.  27,  1822.— Last  week  I  have  felt  far 
from  well,  which  has  led  me  to  consider  the 
possibility  of  this  complaint  still  finishing  my 
earthly  career.  The  thought  has  done  me 
good,  and  the  prospect  has  not  been  dark.  I 
have  been  enabled  to  view  Christ  as  my  eter- 
nal portion,  and  nearly  to  give  up  all  besides. 
I  feel  wonderfully  reconciled  to  leaving  my 
husband  and  children,  and  I  know  I  shall  die 
or  live  as  God  sees  best  for  me.  Dear  Lord, 
thou  art  at  all  times  managing  for  the  best  my 
little  concerns.  Last  week,  also,  I  had  a  most 
interesting  private  conversation  with  Miss 
Jane  Farrell,  who  now  appears  a  true  disciple. 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN.  129 

I  have  seen  her  to-day,  probably  for  the  last 
time  in  this  world,  as  she  leaves  Camstraddan 
on  Tuesday  for  Ireland,  and  is  shortly  going 
to  India,  to  be  married.  Well,  in  a  future 
state  '  there  shall  be  no  more  sea ;'  nothing  to 
divide  the  blessed  inhabitants  ;  nothing  to  in- 
terrupt their  communion.  I  hope  I  have  been 
of  some  use  to  this  interesting  girl." 

Mr.  Farrell  was  the  proprietor  of  an  estate 
near  the  Giant's  Causeway,  in  Ireland;  but 
his  wife  was  in  delicate  health,  and  along  with 
their  three  daughters  they  resided  for  four  or 
five  summers  at  Camstraddan  House,  near 
Luss.  Young  ladies  so  well  informed,  and  of 
manners  so  pleasing,  were  welcome  visitors  in 
most  houses  of  that  neighborhood,  and  they 
were  very  often  at  Rossdhu.  Miss  Jane  es- 
pecially drew  towards  herself  the  affectionate 
observation  of  Lady  Colquhoun.  A  prepos- 
sessing appearance,  good  sense,  a  cultivated 
mind,  a  warm  heart,  and  frank  and  lively 
manners,  made  her  a  universal  favorite ;  but, 
beyond  a  weekly  attendance  at  the  parish 
church,  she  gave  no  evidence  of  an  interest  in 
the   thinors   of  God.     And   even  this   church- 


130  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

going  was  a  mere  formality.  "  Have  you  re- 
marked that  picturesque  old  woman  who  on 
Sundays  sits  on  the  pulpit  stairs?"  she  one  day 
asked  her  friends  at  Rossdhu.  Of  course  they 
had.  "  Oh  !"  said  the  amateur  artist,  ''  she  is 
such  a  fine-looking  old  woman,  I  cannot  take 
my  eyes  off  her  the  whole  time  of  the  sermon, 
and  I  am  painting  her  likeness  from  memory. 
I  can  carry  away  each  Sunday  an  impression 
of  her  features  sufficient  to  employ  my  pencil 
during  the  week."  But,  in  conjunction  with 
other  circumstances,  the  prospect  of  leaving 
home  solemnized  her  mind,  and  led  her  to  ask 
whether,  separated  from  aU  the  means  of  grace, 
her  religion  had  strength  to  stand?  and  this 
led  to  another  question — Avhether  she  had  any 
reliarion  at  all?  A  severe  mental  conflict  en- 
sued,  and  at  the  time  when  her  thoughts  were 
all  engrossed  with  these  anxious  questions,  at 
a  dinner-party  she  met  Lady  Colquhoun.  On 
leaving  the  dining-room  the  ladies  went  out 
to  walk  round  the  garden.  Lady  Colquhoun 
and  Miss  Jane  Farrell  having  separated  from 
the  rest,  in  her  own  sweet  and  engaging  man- 
ner Lady  Colquhoun  introduced  the  subject  of 
religion,  and  her  young  companion  opened  to 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUIIOUN.  131 

her  all  her  mind.  After  this  their  interviews 
were  frequent,  and  as  they  were  the  principal 
means  of  leading  this  interesting  inquirer  into 
the  light  of  the  Gospel,  they  originated  an 
ardent  and  life-long  attachment. 

"  Her  last  visit,"  says  our  informant,  "  is  still 
fresh  on  my  memory.  It  was  a  bright  au- 
tumnal morning,  and  I  well  remember  her 
light  and  elegant  form,  as  she  glided  along  the 
avenue,  after  bidding  farewell  to  her  friend  and 
adviser."  In  company  with  Sir  Edward  and 
Lady  Barnes  she  sailed  for  Ceylon,  and  was 
married  to  her  brother's  partner,  Charles  Scott, 
Esq.  From  her  home  among  the  cinnamon- 
groves  she  wrote  to  her  friend  on  Loch  Lomond 
letters  brimming  over  with  the  fulness  of  her 
own  felicity,  mingled  with  occasional  misgiv- 
ings as  to  her  spiritual  progress.  "  I  possess 
great  earthly  happiness.  I  hear  of  my  beloved 
family  being  in  excellent  health,  and  have  the 
prospect  of  rejoining  them  in  a  very  few  years; 
and  I  have  one  of  the  kindest  and  most  indul- 
gent husbands  that  ever  lived.  But  all  these 
blessings,  instead  of  raising  my  heart  in  thank- 
fulness to  the  Giver  of  every  good,  and  leading 
me  to  devote  myself  more  to  his  service,  seem 


132  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLGlUHOUN. 

only  to  bind  my  thoughts  more  firmly  to  this 
world ;  and  I  am  often  made  to  fear  that  I 
shall  be  deprived  of  some  of  those  great  mer- 
cies I  am  so  unworthy  of  possessing.  Yet  no 
contrition  seems  to  accompany  the  knowledge 
of  my  own  sinfulness,  and  I  have  generally  a 
gaiety  and  happiness  of  heart  which  should 
only  be  produced  by  the  hope  of  daily  ad- 
vancing in  meetness  for  the  kingdom  of  heaven. 
When  my  prayers  are  cold  and  wandering,  I 
feel  I  cannot  deplore  it  as  I  ought,  nor  do  I  ask 
with  sufficient  earnestness  for  assistance  to 
pray  better ;  at  the  same  time,  I  certainly  do 
often  feel  the  indescribable  happiness  of  being 
able  to.  trust  in  One  mighty  to  save,  and  that 
it  is  not  for  our  sakes  that  our  prayers  are 
accepted  by  God.  1  think  I  am  gaining  rather 
more  knowledge  of  my  sinfulness,  and  of  the 
waywardness  of  my  heart ;  but,  as  I  said 
before,  it  is  unaccompanied  by  sorrow  for  my 
offences,  and  does  not  diminish  that  lightness 
of  mind  which  is  certainly  gaining  on  me."  It 
was  thus  that  Lady  Colquhoun's  gentle  and 
guileless  nature  drew  forth  the  confidence  of 
her  younger  friends  especially,  and  encouraged 
them  to  tell  her  "  all  that  was  in  their  heart ;" 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN.  133 

for  they  were  as  sure  of  kind  sympathy  as  of 
wise  advice.  And,  perhaps,  the  fears  of  her 
ingenuous  correspondent  were  not  without 
foundation.  God  may  have  seen  what  she 
herself  suspected,  and  in  order  to  bring  the 
roaming  spirit  back  into  its  quiet  rest,  he  sent 
the  windy  storm  and  the  tempest.  Six  weeks 
after  these  hues  were  written  Mr.  Scott  was 
seized  by  a  fatal  malady,  and  in  a  few  hours  it 
tore  him  from  the  arms  of  his  distracted  wife. 
A  devoted  missionary,  Mr.  Mayor,  heard  of  her 
distress,  and  along  with  Mrs.  Mayor,  the  be- 
loved sister  of  a  man  greatly  beloved, — tlie 
Rev.  E.  Bickersteth,  prevailed  on  her  to  come 
for  a  season  to  their  calm  and  secluded  abode. 
There  she  gradually  regained  composure, — at 
least  serenity  enough  to  benefit  by  the  conver- 
sation and  prayers  of  her  deeply  sympathizing 
friends  ;  and  when,  in  1828,  she  returned  to 
hernative  land,  although  she  brought  with  her 
a  heavy  load  of  sorrow,  she  also  brought  a 
mind  uncommonly  devoted  to  God.  From 
Dublin,  on  February  13,  1829,  she  thus  wrote 
to  Lady  Colquhoun  : — 

"I  have  often  intended  writing  to  you.     In 
the  time  of  my  deepest  affliction,  you  were  one 
12 


134  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

of  the  very  few  my  heart  seemed  to  turn  to, 
feehng  that  you  would  understand  where  con- 
solation can  alone  be  found.  I  have  indeed 
been  in  a  strong  fire  of  affliction  since  I  last 
wrote  to  you.  Oh  !  that  the  fire  had  consumed 
more  of  the  dross.  Theyi  I  was  at  the  height 
of  earthly  happiness.  The  fall  was  sudden 
and  violent,  and  unless  upheld  by  an  Almighty 
arm,  I  must  have  perished  in  my  affliction. 
On  the  first  shock  I  was  left  to  my  own 
strength,  and  the  mind  wandered  under  the 
acuteness  of  anguish.  It  seemed  as  if  I  could 
not  pray  ;  yet  even  the  first  look  to  Him  whose 
compassions  fail  not,  was  answered,  and  in  a 
way  I  could  not  have  conceived  before.  I  was 
made  to  experience  my  own  inability  to  have 
so  much  as  one  thought,  except  by  the  help  of 
God,  and  his  wondrous  power  to  shed  into  the 
soul  the  richest  spiritual  consolations  in  the 
midst  of  nature's  woe.  Oh  the  deep,  deep, 
almost  overpowering  views  then  given  me  of 
the  vastness  of  eternity  ;  and  great  in  propor- 
tion was  the  consolation,  when,  by  the  tender 
mercy  of  God,  there  came  back  on  the  mind 
the  transporting  conviction  that  the  sonl,  which 
seemed  the  dearer  part  of  my  own,  was  entered 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN.  135 

on  an  eternity  of  blessedness, — that,  as  surely 
as  Christ  died  and  rose  again,  even  so  thern 
also  that  sleep  in  Jesus  will  God  bring  with 
him.  And  the  evidence  that  his  state  was 
such,  was  so  abundant,  as  to  raise  my  soul  in 
wonder  and  gratitude.  My  earthly,  backsliding 
heart  had  been  so  satisfied  with  present  happi- 
ness as  to  be  comparatively  forgetful  of  spirit- 
ual ;  but  now  I  remember  with  indescribable 
comfort,  these  last  seven  or  eight  months  in 
particular,  the  gradual,  the  beautiful  change, 
that  often  made  me  exclaim  to  myself,  '  I  may 
have  more  of  religion  on  my  lips,  but  he  has 
infinitely  more  of  it  in  his  heart.'  The  sting 
of  my  many  omissions,  in  regard  to  his  spirit- 
ual w^elfare,  I  thought  at  first  could  never  be 
extracted ;  but  my  compassionate  God  has 
been  pleased  long  to  remove  it,  and  even 
change  it  into  an  additional  motive  of  grati- 
tude to  Him  who  did  it  all  himself,  and  who 
did  not  allow  my  sinfulness  to  come  in  the  way 
of  the  great  work  of  His  salvation." 

Then,  after  mentioning  Mr.  Mayor's  provi- 
dential visit  to  her  dying  husband,  and  her  so- 
journ in  the  house  of  the  missionary  and  his 
"  truly  Christian  wife,"  she  concludes  : — 


136  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

"  My  voyage  was  such  as  to  keep  faith  in 
constant  exercise, — many  dangers,  but  a  pow- 
erful, protecting  God  appearing  through  all.  I 
may  humbly  say, '  Hitherto  hath  the  Lord  helped 
me.'  I  am  continually  made  to  feel  my  weak- 
ness. Were  I  trying  to  look  to  earth,  in  any 
shape,  for  comfort,  the  heart  would  yet  entirely 
sink  under  sorrow.  But,  blessed  be  our  faithful 
God,  who  will  never  leave  nor  forsake  us  ;  who 
can  give  us  faith  to  rest  in  his  promises  ;  and 
who  can  show  the  blessed  termination,  when 
those  sundered  on  earth  shall  unite  forever  in 
praising  and  redeeming  love.  My  dear  Lady 
Colquhoun,  I  have  given  you  a  letter  filled 
about  myself;  but  I  know  you  will  join  with 
me  in  praising  the  mercy  and  love  of  our  Sav- 
iour God.  Your  letter  was  indeed  most  com- 
fortable to  me.  I  received  one  from  you  at 
Baddagama,  written  when  you  thought  me  in 
the  midst  of  earthly  happiness.  I  was  struck 
by  your  saying  in  it :  '  If  we  cannot  give  our 
hearts  to  God,  let  us  pray  that  he  will  take 
them — by  any  means  take  them.'  You  had 
little  idea  then  that  it  required  my  best  earthly 
treasure  to  be  taken  to  heaven  before  I  could 
feel  that  my  all  was  there." 


LIFE    OP    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN.  137 

The  eighteen  years  of  her  widowhood  were 
spent  in  a  succession  of  ministrations  to  one 
invahd  or  afflicted  relation  after  another,  whicli 
in  several  instances  appear  to  have  been  blessed 
to  their  everlasting  salvation.  At  last,  in  the 
year  1845,  and  when  she  hoped  to  see  again  her 
spiritual  parent,  the  Lord  called  her  to  himself. 
She  said,  when  dying,  ''I  laid  too  much  stress 
on  the  ministry  of  man,  and  delighted  in  it.  I 
cannot  now  converse  but  with  difficulty.  God 
is  drawing  me  off  from  all  earthly  props  that  I 
may  lean  solely  on  himself.  How  abundantly 
I  felt  the  promise  fulfilled  last  night !  The 
Comforter,  the  Holy  Ghost,  was  indeed  sent, 
and  abundant  was  the  supply  of  Scripture 
brought  to  my  remembrance.  Not  merely 
what  I  had  committed  to  memory,  but  large 
portions  that  I  had  not,  came  pouring  in  to 
conifort  me."  And  as  God  had  taught  her  to 
live  upon  himself,  so  she  was  very  fearful  of 
being  too  highly  exalted,  or  too  much  spoken 
of  by  others.  A  diary  which  she  had  kept  she 
destroyed  before  her  death,  and  when  told  that 
a  friend  had  written  to  inquire  how  she  was, 
and  how  she  had  felt  supported,  she  said,  "  I 
12* 


138  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

can  so  well  understand  Mr.  Simeon's  feelings,"* 
and,  like  him,  she  for  a  moment  or  two  waxed 
quite  eloquent  in  extolling  her  Saviour,  and 
disparaging  herself;  and  like  him  also  she 
silently  departed,  telling  her  attendant  to  keep 
the  room  quiet,  for  she  was  going  to  sleep. 

Thus,  on  earth  they  never  met  again,  and 
in  the  many  thoughts  which  followed  her  to 
her  Indian  bungalow,  her  Irish  home,  and  her 
cottage  on  the  brink  of  Niagara,  in  the  fancy 
of  her  friend  it  was  always  the  same  Jane  Far- 
rell.  And  though  the  widow's  garb  was  worn, 
and  though  many  griefs  and  watchings  by  sick 
beds  had  doubtless  changed  that  pleasant  coun- 

*  "  He  was  evidently  much  hm-t  at  the  thought  of  even  his 
dearest  friends  coming  round  to  distm-b  the  privacy  which  he 
had  always  wished  for  in  his  dying  hour.  He  had  repeatedly 
charged  me  to  keep  every  one  away  from  him  when  that  sol- 
emu  season  should  arrive,  and  remam  with  him  myself  alone. 
*  *  *  Next  morning  he  referred  to  what  had  happened  the 
previous  night.  '  ISTow,  I  was  much  hurt  at  the  scene  last 
night :  a  scene  !  a  death-bed  scene  I  abhor  from  my  inmost 
soul.  No !'  he  continued,  smiting  three  times  slowly  on  his 
breast, '  No ;  I  am,  I  know,  the  chief  of  sinners ;  and  I  hope 
for  nothing  but  the  mercy  of  God  ur  Christ  Jesus  to  life  eter- 
nal ;  and  I  shall  be,  if  not  the  greatest  nionument  of  God's 
mercy  in  heaven,  yet  the  very  next  to  it ;  for  I  know  of  none 
greater.'" — Cams'  Life  of  Simeon,  p.  810. 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  139 

tenance,  no  change  came  over  that  ardent,  in- 
genuous, and  self-devoting  mind.  And  down 
to  the  close  of  life  Mrs.  Scott  retained  a  fervent 
attachment  to  Lady  Colquhoun,  and  in  her  let- 
ters fondly  reverted  to  the  happy  days  when 
"first  she  knew  the  Lord,"  and  when  they 
were  wont  to  take  sweet  counsel  together. 
"Dear,  dear  Lady  Colquhoun,  I  have  indeed 
often  thanked  God  for  having  given  me  such  a 
Christian  friend.  When  my  mind  was  awak- 
ening, you  were  the  first  tliat  spoke  home  to 
me.  You  first  directed  me  plainly  to  Jesus, 
and  encouraged  me  with  the  assurance  that 
He  would  carry  on  the  work  which  He  alone 
could  commence.  And,  dear  friend,  what  in- 
creasing comfort  there  is  in  that  view,  grounded 
on  God's  own  Word,  that  He  will  perfect  that 
which  concerneth  us,  and  will  not  forsake  the 
work  of  his  own  hands.  What  a  God  we  have  ! 
God  in  Christ.  Truly  you  say,  '  The  end  of 
our  trials  is  to  endear  to  us  Jesus,  and  loose  our 
hold  of  eveiything  else.'  "  Of  these  trials  the 
meek  writer  had  many,  and  one  was  the  loss 
of  the  letters  addressed  to  her  by  her  endeared 
correspondent.  During  a  sojourn  at  Kingston, 
Upper  Canada,  the  house  in  which  she  was  re- 


140  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

siding  was  burnt  to  the  ground,  and  we  cannot 
forbear  inserting  a  portion  of  the  letter  in 
which  she  describes  the  calamity,  April  8, 
1837  :— 

"  You  kindly  said  you  would  send  me  '  The 
Kingdom  of  God.'  All  my  efforts  to  procure  it 
have  been  vain,  and,  alas  !  its  beautiful  sister, 
which  I  prized  so  much,  is  gone.  Where? 
Hke  many  other  fair  and  lovely  things,  to  dust 
and  ashes.  We  were  living  in  greater  comfort 
than  I  ever  expected  to  meet  in  Canada ;  too 
much  at  ease,  no  doubt ;  when  one  night  a  fire 
broke  out  below  us.  The  flames  spread  rapidly, 
and  all  our  worldly  goods  were  consumed.  It 
w^as  night ;  the  house,  of  course,  in  total  dark- 
ness, and  all  sound  asleep,  till  weakened  by 
loud  cries  of  '  Fire  !'  Our  rooms  were  at  the 
greatest  distance  from  the  hall,  and  worst 
situated  for  escape.  The  fire  originated  in  a 
hardw^are  store  under  the  boarding-house,  and 
w^hen  we  got  outside  the  house  we  heard  there 
was  gunpowder  in  the  store  sufficient  to  blow 
it  up.  Two  explosions  there  were ;  but  they 
did  no  additional  harm.  So  there  we  stood,  in 
the  snow,  watching  the  fierce  flames  forking  up 
from  our  rooms,  so  shortly  before  the  picture  of 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN.  141 

peace  and  comfort.  Nothing  could  be  done, 
and  the  whole  of  it  was  so  ordeied  that  one 
could  only  offer  i^.  up  into  His  hands  who  can 
make  all  things  work  together  for  good,  and 
pray  that  we  might  effectually  learn  the  lessons 
it  was  meant  to  teach.  Besides  much  valuable 
property,  I  have  lost  all  my  books  and  written 
papers  and  letters,  my  Indian  things,  with  all 
mementoes  of  beloved  friends  and  past  times. 
Another  hint  to  forget  the  things  which  are 
behind,  and  press  forward.  But  why  do  I  thus 
detail  our  little  losses  ?  I  meant  not  to  do  it. 
Rather  let  me  speak  of  the  great  gain,  the  ever- 
increasing  comfort  of  the  promises,  and  of  our 
Lord's  love,  who  in  every  trial  condescends  to 
speak  such  peace  as  raises  the  heart  to  Himself 
in  continual  thanksgiving.  When  I  think  of 
what  I  deserve  I  can  only  wonder  at  his  gentle 
deahngs.  He  often  says,  '  What  I  do  thou 
knowest  not  now,  but  thou  shalt  know  here- 
after ;'  and  he  graciously  lets  so  much  of  his 
hand  of  love  be  seen  in  every  trial,  that  it  is 
easy  work  to  trust  him  with  the  remainder." 

Of  the  many  letters  which  Lady  Colquhouii 
addressed  to  this  youngest  sister  "  in  the  king- 
dom and  patience  of  Jesus  Christ,"  we  are  thus 


142  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

precluded  from  offering  to  the  reader  any 
specimen.  But  even  this  slight  record  of  so 
dear  a  friend  may  reflect  some  light  on  the 
character  of  Lady  Colquhoun.  It  shows,  at 
least,  how  alert  she  was  for  opportunities  of 
doing  good,  and  how  graciously  God  honored 
her  consistency  and  prospered  her  fidelit3^  Nor 
will  it  be  a  vain  digression  if  it  enkindle  in  the 
reader  or  the  writer  aspirations  after  that 
heavenly-mindedness  and  holy  skill  which 
made  the  subject  of  this  biography  a  hving 
epistle,  and  which  so  frequently  converted 
morning  calls  and  evening  visits  into  "  walks 
of  usefulness." 


CHAJ^TER  IV 


NO  CHASTENING  FOR  THE  PRESENT  SEEJIETH  TO  BE  JOYOUS, 
BUT  grievous:  NEVERTHELESS  AFTERWARD  IT  YIELDETH  THE 
PEACEABLE  FRUIT  OF  RIGHTEOUSNESS  UNTO  THEM  WHICH  ARK 
EXERCISED  THEREBY. HEB.  XII.  11. 


What  causes  the  freshness  which  gives  the  flower 

Its  scent  and  its  summer  hue  ? 
It  came  in  the  dark  and  midnight  hour 

In  drops  of  heavenly  dew  : 
So,  often  in  sorrow  the  soul  receives 

An  influence  from  above, 
Which  beauty,  and  sweetness,  and  freshness  gives 

To  patience,  and  faith,  and  love. 

EDMESTON. 


The  last  extract  from  her  Journal  repre- 
sented Lady  Colquhoun  as  suffering  from  en- 
feebled health.  This  trial  was  of  long  con- 
tinuance; but  it  was  sanctified.  It  turned 
her  thoughts  more  stedfastly  towards  that 
world  of  which  she  thought  it  likely  that  she 
might  so  soon  be  an  inhabitant,  and  it  roused 
her  to  make  more  efforts  for  the  good  of  that 


144  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

one  which  she  was  leaving.     Amongst  other 
plans  of  usefulness  was  one  which,  abruptly 
susfofested,  would    have   startled    her   diffident 
and  retiring  nature;  but  the  idea  stole  on  her 
so  gently,  and  the  process  went  on  so  imper- 
ceptibly, that  almost  before  she  saw  it  formida- 
ble, she  found  it  a  fact  accomplished.     During 
those  languid  months  when  debarred  from  ac- 
tive employments,  she  might  often  be  observed 
seated  on  her  camp-stool,  beside  the  lake,  or 
in    some  sheltered   spot,   and  with  her   pencil 
tracing-  her  meditation  as  it  rose.    And  as  such 
papers   grew   upon   her   hands,    and   she   felt 
some  pleasure  in  perusing  them,  the  thought 
occurred  that  in  a  connected  form  other  people 
might  read  them,  and  might  haply  derive  some 
profit.      And    she   liked    the   scheme    all   the 
rather   when    she   thought   how   isolated   she 
was, — how   few,   comparatively,   came  within 
her  personal  influence,  and  how  seldom,  even 
to  those  few,  she  could  talk  on  the  things  im- 
porting their  eternal  peace.     So  that  this  ex- 
pedient of   addressing    them  anonymously  in 
little  books  seemed  quite  the  plan  for  doing  all 
the  good  and  shunning  all  the  notoriety. 
Her  first  pubhcation  was  the  tract  to  which 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  145 

reference  has  already  been  made.*  With  that 
scrupulosity  which  strikingly  distinguished  her 
character,  it  was  entitled,  "A  Narrative  found- 
ed on  Fact."  Although  every  particular  was 
stated  with  all  the  accuracy  of  an  excellent 
memory,  yet,  as  she  had  taken  no  notes  at  the 
time,  and  could  not  answer  for  every  turn  of 
expression  which  occurs  in  the  dialogue,  she 
thought  it  needful  to  insert  this  qualification. 
The  story  is  not  only  essentially  true,  but  it  is 
an  affecting  record  of  God's  grace.  It  will  be 
read  with  much  advantage  by  those  who  are 
in  the  habit  of  visiting  their  poor  or  afflicted 
neighbors,  and  we  beheve  that  it  has  been  the 
means  of  conveying  to  some  troubled  spirits 
light  and  comfort. 

Next  year,  viz.,  in  1823,  appeared  "Thoughts 
on  the  Religious  Profession  and  Defective 
Practice  of  the  Higher  Classes  of  Society  in 
Scotland.  By  a  Lady."  This  little  volume 
she  wrote  with  an  especial  eye  to  her  own 
personal  acquaintances  ;  and  though  it  did  not 
excite  general  attention,  under  her  incognito 
she  was  frequently  cheered  by  knowing  that 
it  had  fallen  into  the  very  hands  for  which  she 

*  "Despair  and  Hope."    See  p.  100. 

13 


^ 


146  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 


designed  it,  and  that  in  some  cases  beneficial 
results  had  followed. 

This  encouraged  her  to  give  to  the  world,  in" 
1825,  "  Impressions  of  the  Heart,  relative  to 
the  nature  and  excellence  of  Genuine  Relig- 
ion." Even  in  its  nameless  disguise  this  work 
was  widely  circulated,  and  from  its  good  sense 
and  high-toned  spirituality,  along  with  the  re- 
finement of  taste  and  delicacy  of  feeling  which 
it  everywhere  betokened,  many  of  her  personal 
friends  suspected  the  authoress.  And  its  pop- 
ularity has  not  exceeded  its  merits.  Of  that 
artistic  skill  which  makes  the  most  of  materi- 
als, and  which,  in  the  pages  of  some  celebra- 
ted female  essayists,  brings  out  effects  so  bril- 
liant. Lady  Colqahoun  was  nowise  ambitious ; 
and  here  and  there  it  would  be  easy  for  an 
ordinary  critic  to  balance  the  antithesis  more 
nicely,  or  nib  into  a  sharper  paradox  the  pun- 
gent aphorism.  But  to  a  higher  order  of  readers 
these  beautiful  essays  bear  a  special  charm,  by 
reason  of  their  graceful  ease  and  natural  truth- 
fulness. Like  the  conversation  of  their  com- 
piler, they  are  genuine  and  inartificial,  sponta- 
neous and  heartfelt ;  but  still  the  utterance  of 
a  mind  whose  every  tendency  is  upward,  whose 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UIIOUN.  14.7 

every  association  is  with  things  pure  and  good 
and  elevated.  And  in  such  chapters  as  '*  The 
Invisible  Mark,"  "Cease  ye  horn  Man,"  "The 
Ascent  of  tlie  Mountain,"  "The  Celestial  Vis- 
itant," and  "  The  Multitude  before  tlic  Throne," 
we  are  persuaded  that  all  congenial  minds  will 
eagerly  respond  to  the  devotional  fervor,  tlie 
bright  but  chastened  fancy,  and  the  holy  fidel- 
ity in  which  the  gifted  authoress  has  so  well 
transcribed  herself.  Calm,  cheerful,  Christ- 
loving,  no  book  could  be  more  rightly  named 
than  these  "  Impressions  of  the  heart ;"  for, 
according  to  the  Indian's  definition  of  writing, 
she  who  penned  them  has  "  pressed  her  soul 
on  paper." 

^^  Edinhiirgh,  117,  George-street,  Jan.  19, 
1823. — After  dinner,  being  unable  to  read  aloud 
from  my  cough,  I  had  a  most  interesting  con- 
versation with  a  very  dear  friend  for  whom  I 
prayed  with  tears  and  faith.  Since  last  Sab- 
bath, and  indeed  before  it,  I  have  been  remark- 
ably happy  in  my  devotional  exercises.  I  iuivc 
secured  more  time  for  them,  and  liave  been 
confined  at  home,  my  cold  hindering  me  from 
going  to   several  parties.      I   have  also   been 


148  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

busily  employed  in  a  work  that  seems  strange 
to  myself.  Early  last  summer  my  little  book 
was  published,  and  has  met  with  acceptance ; 
I  even  heard  one  instance  in  which  it  had  been 
beneficial ;  praised  be  God  !  And  I  am  now 
attempting  something  on  a  larger  scale,  though 
whether  or  not  it  will  see  the  light,  I  cannot 
tell.  But  I  have  been  earnest  in  my  prayers 
for  direction  and  assistance,  which  encourages 
me  to  hope  it  may  be  blessed.     Amen. 

"  March  2. — Again  detained  at  home  by  a 
cough,  wdiich  has  never  entirely  left  me  since 
coming  here.  My  frame  has  been  far  from 
lively  ;  but  I  have  had  some  feeling  thoughts 
of  mi/  ivants.  Read  Traill's  Works  with  great 
pleasure  ;  they  are  full  of  spiritual  food.  My 
hook  came  out  last  week.  I  have  prayed  to 
be  kept  out  of  sight,  and  to  be  honored  as  an 
instrument  in  the  hand  of  God.  Who  knows 
what  good  may  be  done  ?  I  have  also  prayed 
to  be  kept  humble  if  it  should  meet  with  any 
approbation,  and  I  am  not  sensible  of  any  ela 
tion  regarding  it.  If  it  should  pass  with  little 
notice  it  could  do  me  no  harm. 

"  23. — Attended  in  the  Canongate  and  in  St. 
George's,  and  heard   two   excellent   sermons. 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQUHOUN.  149 

Mr.  Thomson's,  on  the  value  of  the  Sciiptines, 
was  very  striking.  The  duties  of  the  evening 
were  performed  as  usual,  and  at  night  I  rcalhj 
prayed.  This  day  has  heen  comfortable  ;  but 
last  week  I  was  much  in  company,  and  I  seem 
as  unable  as  ever  to  withstand  its  influence. 
I  am  almost  weary  of  repeating  my  conviction 
of  guilt,  of  weakness,  of  earthliness  ;  but  each 
day  proves  it,  and  every  period  of  my  life.  In 
town  1  fancy  I  should  be  better  in  the  country  ; 
in  the  country  I  imagine  a  change  of  means 
would  enliven  me.  No.  It  is  myself  I  would 
fly  from.  O  wretched  being,  who  shall  deliver 
me!  I  thank  God,  through  Jesus  Christ,  my 
Lord. 

^' Bossdhu,  June  1. — One  great  cause  of 
complaint  with  regard  to  myself  I  think  is, 
that  I  live  too  little  upon  Christ.  I  could  not 
live  without  him :  but  I  forget  my  need  of 
daily  and  hourly  supplies  from  his  hand  of 
support  and  grace.  I  forget  to  ar-'k  his  aid.  not 
merely  formally  in  the  morning,  but  often,  and 
as  my  necessities  arise.  I  forget  to  hold  with 
him  a  continual  intercourse  of  prayer  and 
praise ;  in  short,  to  live  by  his  constant 
bounty,  as  the  Israelites  lived  by  the  heav- 
13* 


150  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLCIUHOUN. 

enly  manna. — It  has  given  me  no  small 
concern  to  find  that  I  am  suspected  by  some 
as  the  author  of  my  last  httle  work  ;  but  I 
have  entreated  my  Lord  to  manage  for  me 
everything  concerning  it,  and  I  am  confident 
he  will.  •  V  - 

"  8. — No  sermon  at  Luss,  being  the  Sacra- 
ment at  Bonhill.  Have,  during  the  forenoon, 
been  very  happy  in  reading  and  prayer,  and  in 
conversation  with  Sir  James  on  the  great  and 
glorious  events  which  we  are  led  by  prophecy 
to  anticipate  as  very  near.  In  all  probability  we 
shall  be  laid  in  the  grave  before  the  time  is  ful- 
filled ;  but  still  the  prospect  is  cheering,  that 
the  kingdoms  of  this  world  shall  become  the 
kingdoms  of  the  Lord  and  his  Christ. 

"22. — Thanks  be  to  his  mercy,  the  love  of 
Christ — that  long-wish ed-for  grace — of  late  has 
dawned  upon  my  heart.  I  have  been  more 
alive  to  my  Saviour's  beauty,  and  have  felt  my 
dependence  upon  him  for  everything,  alike  for 
one  moment's  comfort,  and  for  the  happiness  of 
a  whole  eternity.  My  intercourse  and  com- 
munion with  him  have  been  sweeter,  and  I  can 
cast  on  his  care  myself  and  all  my  concerns. 
I  feel  the  inferiority  of  creature  love.     Amen  j 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  151 

thus  be  it  to  thy  poor  worthless  child  more  and 
more,  dear  Lord ! 

^^  July  13. — Since  last  Sabbath  a  power- 
ful temptation  has  occurred  to  my  mind,  and 
damped  my  joy.  It  was  first  impressed  upon 
me  that  our  Lord  is  not  equal  with  God  the 
Father ;  but  after  searching  my  Bible,  this  text 
set  meat  rest  regarding  that  point,  'Making 
himself  equal  with  God,'  an  inference  which  he 
does  not  deny,  John  v.  IS.  But  here  my  spir- 
itual adversary  did  not  rest ;  for  being  relieved 
as  to  that  point  I  was  next  tempted  to  doubt 
the  truth  of  revelation.  Sad  was  my  heart  for 
some  days  as  I  labored  to  recollect  the  evi- 
dences that  the  Scriptures  are  divinely  inspired. 
I  felt  that  Satan  was  envious  of  my  hope  in 
God,  and  strove  to  destroy  it ;  and  yet  doubt 
would  force  itself  on  my  mind.  If  I  had  no 
God  on  whom  to  rest,  all  was  lost.  Among 
olher  books,  '  Watson's  Apology'  has  been  of 
use  in  leading  me  to  see  the  reasonableness  of 
belief  in  Jesus.  That  the  facts  recorded  in 
the  Bible  are  true,  profane  as  well  as  sacred 
history  testifies ;  and  if  these  are  true,  Chris- 
tianity is  true.  O  Lord,  confirm  my  weak  and 
wavering  faith ! 


152  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQUHOUN. 

"  13. — My  faith  is  confirmed.  The  proofs 
from  prophecy,  from  miracles,  from  the  hfe  of 
Christ,  from  the  tendency  of  the  Gospel,  and 
many  others,  are  indeed  satisfactory.  And 
now,  O  Lord,  what  wait  I  for  ?  my  hope  is  in 
thy  word. 

"20.  Commiwiion  Sabhath. — When  I  con- 
sider the  price  paid  for  onr  redemption,  how 
marvellous  is  the  theme  !  So  familiar  to  our 
thoughts  has  it  become  that  we  can  scarcely 
reflect  on  the  amazing  truth  that  God  suffered 
to  save  us.  O  may  I  forever  live  to  praise  him ! 
He  suffered  in  no  slight  measure,  but  intensely, 
and  with  the  natural  dread  and  aversion  from 
agony  that  we  all  feel ;  yet  calmly,  resolutely, 
and  with  the  dignity  which  his  divinity  alone 
could  inspire. 

"  Aifg.  31. — Death  has  made  an  inroad  on 
my  real  friends.  My  old  and  faithful  servant, 
Morris,*  has  gone  to  her  eternal  rest,  full  of 
days,  at  the  age  of  eighty.  She  brought  up 
my  beloved  Hannah  and  me,  not  only  with 
care  and  affection,  but  with  an  endeavor  to 
lead  us  in  the  paths  of  piety.  I  rejoice  to  think 
that  we  were  a  comfort  to  her  in  her  declining 
*  See  p.  14. 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQUHOUN.  153 

years.  And  now  I  alone  am  left  of  our  nur- 
sery circle.  Both  the  departed  have  gone,  I 
trust,  to  glory.     Oh  may  I  follow. 

"  Oct.  5. — Have  to  complain  to-day  of  a  life- 
less heart.  What  a  diilerence  is  there  between 
the  duties  of  religion  as  performed  when  the 
blessed  Spirit  enlightens,  warms,  and  purifies, 
and  when  all  is  the  outward  act !  I  hope,  how- 
ever, I  am  not  wrong  in  relying  on  the  Saviour 
for  acceptance,  even  in  performing  duties  such 
as  these.  He  is  perfect,  and  through  his  sacri- 
fice and  righteousness  my  poor  services  will,  I 
trust,  be  pardoned  and  received.  In  going  to 
church  I  saw  a  melancholy  scene.  The  ex- 
cessive rain  of  last  night  had  flooded  whole 
fields  of  corn,  and  in  some  places  the  sheaves 
had  floated  into  the  lake,  and  the  poor  people 
were  trying  to  save  them. 

'•  117,  George-street,  Edinburgh,  Feb.  15, 
1824. — Oh  how  shall  I  praise  the  Lord  for  his 
goodness  !  Last  week  I  was  much  in  company, 
and  alas,  alas  !  I  much  forgot  my  God.  But 
hearing  that  this  was  the  Communion  Sabl^ath 
in  the  Canongate  Chapel,  though  without  the 
possibility  of  devoting  any  time  to  preparation, 
I  resolved  to  attend,  and  never  did  I  enjoy  more 


154  LIFE    OP    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN, 

of  the  presence  of  God  at  his  table.  Oh  !  he  is 
kind,  he  is  gracious  to  a  poor,  weak,  inconsist- 
ent, lifeless  creature.  Every  word  of  Mr.  Tait's 
exhortation  reached  my  heart.  He  exhorted 
us  first  to  remember  our  transgressions,  our 
short-comings  in  duty,  our  un worthiness.  I 
thought,  I  am  sure  this  is  for  me.  But  having 
wounded  he  healed,  and  next  pronounced  the 
mourner  '  blessed.'  He  then  exhorted  us  to  ex- 
pect largely,  for  here  God  smells  a  sweet  savor 
in  Christ  crucified ;  and  he  concluded  by  en- 
forcing holiness, — yea,  to  shine  w^th  the  lustre 
of  holiness,  while  we  exhibit  the  depth  of  hu- 
mility. Returning  home,  I  prayed  to  my  ex- 
alted High  Priest  with  very  much  feeling,  giv- 
ing myself  entirely  up  to  him,  and  imploring 
his  blessing  on  me  and  my  family  for  evermore. 
In  the  evening  I  read  to  my  young  people  and 
servants  with  pleasure,  and  all  the  day  have 
felt  near  to  God,  united  to  him  in  covenant, 
complete  in  Christ. 

"  Rossd/ui,  Sept.  5. — Last  Lord's-day  I  was 
in  Edinburgh,  having  gone  for  medical  ad- 
vice. .  .  .  Attended  St.  George's  with  benefit ; 
but,  alas  !  I  have  to  record  an  act  of  transgres- 
sion in  return  for  the  Lord's  mercy  towards  me. 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  155 

I  was  living  at  the  British  Hotel,  and  Mrs. 


asked  me  to  dine  with  her  after  sermon.  We 
never  accept  invitations  on  the  Sabbath  ;  but 
somehow  I  agreed,  as  we  were  to  remain  only 
two  days  in  Edinburgh,  and  the  following  one 
was  to  be  spent  with  my  father's  faniily.  It  did 
not  occur  to  me  that  I  had  done  wrong,  till  I 
found  how  the  evening  was  employed,  and  then 
all  the  objections  to  my  going  occurred  in  full 
force  ;  my  own  loss  of  spiritual  feeling ;  example 
to  others  ;  the  remark  of  one  asked  to  meet  me, 
but  who  did  not  come,  and  which  stung  me  to 
the  quick, — 'I  am  sure  I  may  do  what  Lady 
C.  does ;'  besides  the  employment  of  servants 
in  preparation,  &c.  O  Lord,  pardon  this  wilful 
offence,  and  may  I  never  thus  spend  thy  holy 
day  again  ! 

"  Oct.  17. — Being  employed  last  week  in 
some  deeds  of  mercy,  rejoiced  to  think  that  such 
was  the  frequent  employment  of  my  Lord. 
Was  delighted  in  reviewing  his  character,  and 
longed  for  greater  assimilation  to  it. 

^^  Nov.  21. — Have  been  again  in  Edinburgh. 
Went  with  Sir  James  to  witness  my  sister  Julia's 
marriage  to  Lord  Glasgow,  an  event  which 
gives  satisfaction  to  the  whole  family.     May  it 


156  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

be  blessed  to  their  everlasting  good  !  It  was 
the  time  of  the  Edinburgh  sacrament.  I  at- 
tended in  St.  George's  and  was  pleased,  but  I 
fear  not  much  edified.  This  day,  at  home, 
with  no  means  but  my  book,  my  heart  has  been 
with  God. 

'•4,  Charlotte-square^  Edinhiirgh,  Jan.  16, 
1825. — I  have  been  weak  and  low,  and  pre- 
vented last  Sabbath  "from  writing  here ;  but  I 
cried  unto  the  Lord  and  showed  before  him  my 
trouble,  and  he  listened  to  my  supplication. 
To-day  have  been  twice  to  St.  George's,  and 
particularly  blessed  in  the  afternoon  :  the  ser- 
mon upon  'abounding  more  and  more  in  reli- 
gion.' My  intended  work,  'Impressions  of  the 
Heart,'  is  in  the  press.  Oh  for  a  blessing  upon 
it !  Lord,  hear  my  many  prayers  for  this  !  Let 
it  find  acceptance  with  the  world.  Give  it  ac- 
cess, not  only  to  the  closets,  but  to  the  hearts  of 
thy  people.  It  is  indeed  much  to  ask  from  a 
means  so  inconsiderable ;  but.  Lord,  make  it 
extensively  useful. 

"  Fth.  6. — On  Frida3\  accompanied  by  Sir 
James,  my  brother  George,  Mrs.  Sinclair,  (fee, 
drank  tea  with  Dr.  Colquhoun  of  Leith.  It 
was  truly  affecting  to  hear  the  venerable  man 


LIFE    OP    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  157 

discourse  on  prayer  and  other  religious  topics, 
He  gave  ine  and  mine  his  fullest  blessing,  and 
I  was  refreshed  by  the  visit." 

As  has  already  been  noticed,  Dr.  Colquhoun 
was  a  native  of  Luss,  and,  of  course,  a  member 
of  the  clan.  For  nearly  fifty  years  he  was 
minister  of  the  New  Kirk,  Leith ;  and  to  his 
solid  and  systematic  expositions  of  Scripture 
hearers  resorted  not  only  from  the  city  of 
Edinburgh,  but  from  places  as  remote  as  Dal- 
keith and  Newbattle.  Besides  Boston  and  the 
Erskines,  his  theological  models  were  Witsius 
and  Meestricht,  Yoetius  and  Cloppenburg,  and 
his  own  mind  had  all  the  system  and  precision 
of  a  Dutch  Divine.  No  modern  better  merited 
the  title  so  often  bestowed  on  the  puritans, — 
'•  a  painful  preacher  of  the  holy  Gospel."  His 
expositions  were  ready-made  commentaries, 
and  every  sermon  was  a  chapter  in  a  forth- 
coming treatise,  whilst  his  deliberate  enuncia- 
tion, like  an  audible  typography,  rendered 
ample  justice  to  every  italic,  dot,  and  hyphen. 
It  would,  however,  be  a  great  mistake  to  fancy 
that  he  was  a  mere  systematist.  Much  as 
they  valued  his  methodical  arrangement  and 
U 


158  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLCIUHOUN. 

exhaustive  copiousness,  the  best  of  his  hearers 
prized  still  more  his  affectionate  applications 
of  the  truth,  and  the  singular  judgment  with 
which  he  handled  questions  of  conscience. 
And  in  the  midst  of  his  mild  catholicity,  to 
many  there  was  a  peculiar  charm  in  his  cov- 
enanting fervor.  Some  of  them  can  still  re- 
member with  what  pathos  he  used  to  pray  that 
the  Most  High  "  would  revive  the  credit  of  a 
covenanted  work  of  reformation,  that  he  would 
repair  the  carved  work  of  the  sanctuary,  which 
had  been  broken  down,  and  build  up  the 
breaches  of  Zion,  which  are  wide  as  the  sea ;" 
and  they  can  tell  how,  in  concluding  an  expo- 
sition of  the  Psalms  which  had  lasted  seven- 
teen years,  he  remarked,  "  I  have  much  reason 
to  bless  the  Lord  that  I  have  never,  like  many 
of  my  brethren,  been  so  far  left  to  myself  as  to 
use  in  the  public  worship  of  God  hymns  of 
human  composition."* 

*  It  must  be  regretted  that,  in  common  -with  so  many  dis- 
tinguished ministers  of  the  Church  of  Scotland,  Dr.  Colqu- 
houn  has  passed  away  without  any  tribute  to  liis  memory. 
The  natural  repositories — the  religious  magazines  of  the  coun- 
try— are  vainly  searched  for  fuller  notices.  In  the  "  Christian 
Instructor,"  vol.  xxvi.  p.  860,  two  of  the  most  remarkable 
ministers  of  that  day  are  thus  disposed  of:— 


LIFE    OP    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  159 

Except  in  theological  soundness,  the  minister 
named  in  the  next  paragraph  was  a  great  con- 
trast to  Dr.  Colquhoun.  The  fair,  soft  coun- 
tenance, surmounted  by  its  sleek,  yellow  wig, 
the  measured  tones  and  quiet  air  of  the  outer 
man,  were  in  true  keeping  with  the  phlegmatic 
temper  of  the  South-Leith  divine  ;  and  as  true 
an  index  of  his  lofty  idealism  and  sanguine 
through-going,  were  the  tall  form,  the  brilliant 
but  pensive  eye,  the  nervous  gait,  and  the  im- 
passioned address  which  marked  the  pastor  of 
Strathblane.  By  nature  a  recluse,  and  rejoicing 
in  a  splendid  library,  his  philanthropy  and  his 
love  of  freedom  drew  him  frequently  into  public 
life,  and  eventually  health  and  life  were  lavished 
in  efforts  to  break  up  the  religious  apathy  of  a 
singularly  callous  neighborhood.  With  pe- 
culiar emotion  the  writer  sometimes  recalls  those 

"Died,  28th  Oct.  (1827)  the  Rev.  Dr.  Thomag  Davidson,  of 
Muirhouse,  one  of  the  ministers  of  Tolbooth  Church,  Edin- 
burgh, in  the  81st  year  of  his  age  and  Sith  of  his  ministry. 

"  21^1  November,  the  Rev.  Dr.  John  Colquhuon,  Minister 
of  the  Chapel  of  Ease,  Leith,  in  the  80th  year  of  liis  age,  and 
46  th  of  his  ministry." 

For  the  above  notice  of  Dr.  Colqulioun  the  Editor  is  in- 
debted to  his  esteemed  friend,  Mr.  Rowan,  of  the  Free  Col- 
lege Library,  Edinburgh. 


160  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

magnificent  exhibitions  of  redeeming  love  witb 
Avliich  his  own  boyhood  was  famihar,  and 
wonders  how,  hke  his  fellow-parishioners,  he 
was  so  little  thrilled  by  their  grandeur,  so  little 
softened  by  their  tenderness.  To  Lady  Col- 
quhoun,  however,  these  attributes  of  the  ardent 
evangelist  were  a  sufficient  attraction ;  and, 
after  the  death  of  Dr.  Buchanan,  the  minister 
who  enjoyed  most  of  her  friendship  was  Dr. 
Hamilton.  And  it  is  only  because  her  fittest 
biographer  died  before  her,  that  another  pays 
to  her  Ladyship's  memory  this  tribute  of  in- 
herited respect  and  attachment. 

"  March  13. — Have  been  much  in  the  society 
of  the  pious  during  the  past  week,  and  it  has 
been  blessed  to  me.  I  had  an  unexpected  call 
from  Dr.  Hamilton  of  Strathblane,  which  gave 
me  great  pleasure.  He  wishes  that  I  should 
give  my  name  to  the  next  edition.  Oh  !  what 
shall  I,  what  should  I  do  ?  Lord,  take  it  or 
not  as  thou  wilt,  and  may  my  fears,  or  perhaps 
vanity,  be  quite  excluded.  I  would  stand  by, 
as  having  nothing  to  say  in  the  decision.  Let 
thy  glory  and  thy  pleasure  be  the  rule,  and 
influence   my  mind   according   to  these.     On 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN.  161 

Tuesday  was  at  a  delightful  meeting  for  the 
Irish.  On  Thursday  heard  Dr.  Gordon  preach 
a  charity  sermon  for  diifusing  rehgious  know- 
ledge among  the  poor.  Friday  dined  with  my 
brother  George,  and  met  Mr.  Wynne,  and  some 
others  ;  and  yesterday  George  took  me  to  call 
for  Lady  Carnegie.  All  these  advantages  have 
not  been  entirely  lost  upon  me,  but  have  been 
the  means  of  raising  my  heart  to  God.  Oh  how 
delightful  will  be  the  society  of  heaven,  ever 
with  one  another,  and  ever  with  the  Lord  ! 

^^Rossdhif,  July  17. — Our  communion.  My 
mercies  are  new  and  my  feehngs  varied.  In 
the  first  place.  I  have  been  greatly  hindered  in 
heart-work  by  bodily  weakness.  When  I 
would  pray,  I  incline  to  sleep;  and  I  have 
been  greatly  exhausted  both  to-day  and  yes- 
terday. Surely  my  Lord,  my  own  Lord  Jesus, 
who  was  himself  united  to  humanity,  knows 
this.  Would  a  kind  father  say  to  a  worn-out 
child.  Get  up  and  work?  May  I  not  rather 
hope  that  the  Redeemer's  language  to  me  is, 
'the  spirit  is  willing,  but  the  flesh  is  weak?' 
Nevertheless  I  did  come  to  Christ,  and  I  did 
hope  in  him  ;  and  I  do  feel  some  love  to  my 
adorable  Saviour.  With  something  of  joyful 
14* 


162  LIFE    OP    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

anticipation  I  look  forward  to  being  with  him 
forever.  Here,  I  am  laboring  to  catch  a  spark 
or  two  of  celestial  fire ;  but  oh  !  to  have  it 
blazing  around  me,  enlightening  and  warming 
my  whole  affections  in  the  paradise  above! 

"  May  28,  1826. — (Beginning  a  new  volume 
of  the   MS.  journal.)     My  hfe  wears  apace ! 
My  appointed  time  is  running  on,  years  roll 
over  and  are  gone.     Where  are  those  with  the 
occurrences  of  which  I  filled  my  last  little  vol- 
ume ?     They  have  fled  ;  but  the  remembrance 
of  them  lives  not  only  in  that  little  book,  but 
in  the  mind  of  the  eternal  God.    Each  thought 
and  every  action  is  present  with  him,  even  as 
if  it  were   only  passing  nov\\     Then  what  a 
poor  creature  do  I  appear  !  and  liow  rich  is  his 
mercy  in  compassionating  and  blessing  such  ! 
I  commence  this  book:  shall  I  finish  it?   or 
shall  this  hand  be  arrested  by  death,  and  shall 
these  fingers  be  consigned  to  the  grave  to  mix 
with  their  native  earth  ?     Lord,  thou  knowest. 
But  whatever  awaits  thy  cliild,  be  present,  my 
God,  to   cheer,   to    support,   to    strengthen,   to 
sanctify,  to  glorify.     Amen.      Sh'  James   has 
been  absent  about  a  fortnight,  attending  the 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQUHOUN.  163 

General  Assembly,  of  which  he  is  for  the  first 
time  a  member. 

^'Julij  9. — Oil  how  great  is  thy  goodness 
towards  them  that  fear  thee  !  towards  tiiem 
that  hope  in  thy  mercy!  Thou  hast  refreshed 
the  soul  of  thy  poor  weak  servant,  my  God  ! 
Last  week  we  had  the  happiness  of  a  visit  for 
some  days  from  Mr.  Malan  of  Geneva,  with 
whom  James  resided  for  a  year.  He  is  a  most 
devoted  servant  of  God,  and  has  been  the  in- 
strument of  arousing,  and  I  hope  confirming, 
my  too  wavering  faith.  He  dwells  much  on 
the  necessity  of  assurance,  and  even  appears 
to  think  it  essential  to  saving  faith.  In  this 
last  I  cannot  agree  with  him ;  but  I  am  con- 
vinced w^e  doubt  when  we  ought  not.  Where- 
fore doubt  ?  Is  it  not  the  truth  of  God  that  we 
doubt  ?  Perhaps  our  sins  are  the  cause.  Well, 
cleave  the  closer  to  the  Saviour ;  we  shall  not 
fall  away  if  he  upholds  us.  Or,  we  are  not 
sure  that  we  have  come  to  Christ.  Then  come 
now.  To-day  I  am  unable  to  attend  the 
house  of  prayer ;  but  oh  !  how  sweet  were  my 
morning  hours,  when  all  the  family  were  at 
church.  Surely,  Lord,  thy  dear  servant  who 
was  lately  here  cried  mightily  unto  thee  for 


164  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

me,  and  thou  hast  heard  his  petitions.  Present 
thou  wast,  even  as  if  I  had  seen  thee  with 
me.  I  read  the  eighty-sixth  and  eighty-ninth 
Psahns.  In  the  latter  I  read  that  'in  thy 
righteousness  I  am  exalted.'  The  righteous- 
ness of  God  !  noble  thought !  clothed  with  this, 
how  perfect  am  I !  where  can  blemish  be  found  ? 
I  read  that  '  Thou,  Lord,  art  my  strength.' 
Then  I  shall  never,  never  forsake  thee,  but  go 
on  from  strength  to  strength.  I  read  that 
'  Thou,  Lord,  art  my  defence.'  Then  evil 
cannot  assail  me.  No,  what  I  think  evil  is 
good,  God  stands  between  me  and  all  harm. 
Let  that  barrier  be  broken,  if  it  be  possible  !  I 
read,  'The  Holy  One  of  Israel  is  my  King, 
and  help  is  laid  on  One  that  is  mighty.'  Oh ! 
what  a  King!  Dear  Lord,  thou  art  mighty, 
thou  art  holy  ;  I  will  fight  under  thy  banner ; 
I  will  rejoice  in  thy  name  all  the  day  long. 

''Edinburgh^  Feb.  11,  1827.— Have  once 
more  heard  good  Dr.  Marshman  preach  from 
Romans  xii.  1.  Had  likewise  the  pleasure  of 
meeting  him  at  my  brother's  house  last  week. 
With  my  heart  I  gave  him  the  right  hand  of 
fellowship.  We  may  never  meet  again  on 
earth,  as  he  is  going  very  soon  again  to  India, 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLdUHOUN.  165 

to  live  and  die  in  his  Master's  service  there ; 
but  I  trust  we  shall  meet  in  the  multitude  of 
the  redeemed  around  the  throne.  My  prayers 
ascend  for  him  that  he  may  be  supported  in 
whatever  trials  he  is  called  to  endure,  and  that 
after  turning-  many  to  righteousness  he  may 
shine  as  the  stars  forever  and  ever. 

"  Rossdhii,  July  22,  1827. — A  sweet  day 
this,  for  though  not  in  his  temple,  I  saw  the 
beauty  of  my  King.  I  was  prevented  going 
from  indisposition,  which  however  did  not  pre- 
vent enjoying  myself  at  home.  I  sat  by  the 
water's  edge,  and  in  my  little  summer-house, 
with  the  Bible ;  and  the  loveliness  of  Jesus 
never  appeared  to  me  more  apparent.  How 
kind,  how  gracious  his  words  !  I  have  been 
thinking  a  good  deal  on  the  doctrine  of  assur- 
ance, of  which  much  is  said  since  Dr.  Malan's 
visit  to  Scotland.  It  appears  to  me  plain  that 
assurance  is  perfectly  warrantable  in  any  sin- 
cere believer,  and  ought  perhaps  to  be  more 
pressed  upon  such,  than  is  often  done  ;  but  I 
cannot  exclude  all  who  have  it  not.  It  is  a 
grace,  a  gift,  and  is  not  given  to  all ;  and  I  do 
believe  that  saving  faith  exists  without  it. 
Does  not  our  Lord  hunself  speak  of  weak  faith, 


166  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

accompanied  by  doubting?  (Matt.  xiv.  31.) 
I  feel,  however,  that  unbelief  is  sinful,  and  do 
indeed  hope,  and  am  confident  of  being  my- 
self accepted,  freely,  for  His  name's  sake. 
Mrs.  Baillie  and  my  sister  M.  are  here. 

"  Edinburgh,  Feb.  3,  1828.— Mr.  Tait's  ser- 
mon was  from  these  words,  '  O  Israel,  thou 
shalt  not  be  forgotten  of  me,'  and  it  did  me 
good.  Oh  the  height  and  the  depth  of  the 
love  of  God  !  I  have  not  been  forgotten  of 
him  ;  not  forgotten  in  j^outh,  not  forgotten  in 
trial,  in  care,  in  sickness;  not  forgotten  when 
sinning,  and  forgetting  God.  Nor  shall  my 
little  unimportant  concerns  be  forgotten  while 
I  live ;  nor  shall  I  be  forgotten  to  eternity  ! 
Precious  promise  !  for  days  of  sore  trial  may 
come,  but  if  God  remembers  his  poor  child 
they  shall  be  mitigated.  And  none  of  my 
prayers  are  forgotten.  Lord,  I  would  ac- 
knowledge when  I  have  myself  forgotten 
them,  thou  hast  often  brought  them  to  my 
recollection  by  granting  their  petitions. 

"  March  30. — In  the  evening  went  to  my 
brother  George's,  where  Mr.  Mejanel  discours- 
ed on  the  type  of  the  Brazen  Serpent.  We 
had  a  little  conversation  on  prayer,   and  he  is 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  167 

almost  the  only  person  I  have  found  who 
seems  to  have  completely  my  own  views  on 
the  subject ;  that  '  all  things  whatsoever  we 
ask  in  prayer,  believing^  we  shall  receive.'  I 
know  not  what  words  to  use  stronger  or  clearer 
than  the  language  of  this  delightful  promise ; 
and  why  is  it  not  credited?  Mr.  M.  said  that 
real  Christians  are  warranted  to  expect  assur- 
edly an  answer  to  every  prayer  which  they 
can  offer  without  doubting  of  its  success ;  be- 
cause this  confidence  is  given  by  the  Spirit  of 
God  ;  because  his  Word  declares  that  when 
they  pray  believingj  they  receive  their  peti- 
tions ;  and  because  they  will  not  be  permitted 
by  God  thus  to  ask  and  yet  ask  amiss.  By 
many  this  would  be  thought  presumption  or 
enthusiasm ;  but  it  has  long  been  my  belief, 
founded  on  experience  and  the  promises. 

''  18,  Circus^  Edinburgh,  Aj)ril  5,  1829. — • 
This  is  the  last  Sabbath  previous  to  my  beloved 

's  leaving  me.     I  feel  strangely  in  the 

prospect  of  her  being  removed  from  my  care, 
and  sorrowfully  when  I  think  of  the  days  that 
are  past,  her  infant  years  as  well  as  those  whea 
she  has  been  my  sweet  and  cheerful  com- 
panion.    This  marriage  is  the  subject  of  my 


1)8  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

ardent  prayer ;  therefore  it  is  well,  it  is  right. 
I  know  the  Lord  hears  his  poor  ungrateful 
servant,  and  this  completely  satisfies  me  as  to 
the  result. 

"  Rossdhu,  April  26. — My  beloved  H.  and 
Mr.  R.  are  now  in  London.  They  have  been 
peculiarly  on  my  mind  to-day,  and  I  have 
again  and  again  prayed  importunately  for 
them.  I  rejoice  in  this  ;  for  I  know  that  pray- 
er, real  prayer,  is  heard  ;  and  therefore  I  be- 
lieve that  spiritual  and  eternal  blessings  await 
my  children.  I  am  happy  to  add  that  since 
my  return  home,  I  have  felt  spiritually  minded, 
which  is  life  and  peace.  I  feel  confidence  in 
God,  and  commit  all  my  concerns  into  his 
hand,  beheving  that  he  will  manage  for  me, 
what  might  seem  immaterial  to  a  fellow-worm, 
but  which  is  not  beneath  the  notice  of  the 
Eternal.  I  expect  to  have  more  tokens  of  his 
faithfulness  yet  to  write  of. 

''  Edinburgh,  March  20, 1831.— I  feel  that  I 
am  not  living  for  God  solely  and  exclusively,  as 
I  ought  to  do,  and  as  his  people  do.  I  feel  a 
worldly,  carnal  spirit,  and  a  sort  of  jntt-of  re- 
ligion which  quiets  the  conscience,  but  which 
does  me  little  good,  and  is  not  the  radical  prin- 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ,UHOUN.  169 

ciple  influencing  every  thought.  I  know  it  is 
worldly  care  which  has  hurt  me,  and  that 
Satan  has  found  out  a  point  in  which  I  am  in- 
deed vulnerable,  my  anxiety  respecting  my 
family  ;  and  he  tempts  me  to  forsake  the  foun- 
tain of  living  water  and  hew  out  broken  cis- 
terns, which  can  hold  no  water. 

'■  Rossdhii,  Jane  12. — Another  happy  Sab- 
bath spent  at  home.  This  being  Bonhill  sac- 
rament there  is  no  sermon  at  Luss.  The  in- 
fluences of  the  Spirit  were  certainly  visible  this 
day  in  leading  my  heart  to  God.  The  charac- 
ter of  Christ  appeared  to  me  in  something  of 
its  genuine  loveliness.  I  could  pray  with  fer- 
vor, and  feel  what  I  read.  Dr.  Hamilton's 
'Mourner  in  Zion  comforted,'  I  found  in 
many  parts  in  unison  with  my  own  experi- 
ence, and  I  read  it  with  pleasure.  Thus, 
when  God  is  pleased  to  breathe  on  these  dry 
bones  they  live.  It  may  be  needless  to  repeat 
that  I  am  nothing,  and  can  do  nothing,  but  I 
am  deeply  sensible  of  the  truth  of  it.  My 
family  having  grown  up,  their  various  in- 
terests, and  connections,  and  plans  have  cer- 
tainly led  me  in  heart  more  into  the  world 
than  I  ever  expected  to  be ;  but  the  Lord  is 
15 


170  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLGIUHOUN. 

faithful !  He  will  find  a  method  of  escape, 
and  surely  I  shall  enter  glory,  shouting, 
*  Grace^  grace!' 

"  Regency -square^  Brighton,  Nov.  27. — Last 
Lord's-day  was  little  Hke  the  Sabbath  to  me. 
I  was  in  the  steam-vessel,  and  unable  to  sit  up 
at  all  from  sickness.  But  in  my  little  berth  I 
remembered  my  God,  and  was  enabled  to  con- 
fide in  him.  Some  repairs  necessary  to  the 
safety  of  the  sliip,  which  had  encountered  a 
storm  in  coming  from  London,  rendered  a  de- 
lay of  two  days  necessary,  and  thus  I  was  com- 
pelled to  be  at  sea  on  Sunday,  which  I  had 
particularly  planned  to  avoid.  Our  passage 
was  perfectly  safe,  and  my  prayers  respecting 
it  all  heard.  Was  one  day  in  London.  How 
aflfecting  to  see  that  place  !  so  many  interesting 
years  have  elapsed  since  I  was  there  before, 
and  two  of  my  dearest  friends  there,  my  much- 
loved  sister  and  excellent  nurse,  Morris,  are 
gone  to  glory.  On  my  way  here  1  saw  Mr. 
Maitland,  of  Clapham  ; — Oh  !  how  changed  ! 
He  is  quite  helplesb  from  palsy ;  but  he  is  one 
of  the  Lord's  people,  and  all  is  well.  Nothing 
could  be  better  ordered  than  everything  has 
been  respecting  this  journey.    Sarah  and  James 


LIFE    OF    LALY    COLaUHOUN.  171 

have  accompanied  me,  and  Sir  James  is  to  fol- 
low in  January.  Mr.  Reade*  and  Helen  we 
found  well,  and  they  are  to  be  with  us  here. 
The  Lord  has  fixed  the  bounds  of  our  habita- 
tion in  a  good  and  cheerful  house,  and  to  crown 
all,  my  heart  has  been  much  with  him  in  prayer 
and  praise.  Went  to  St.  James's  and  heard  an 
excellent  sermon, — '  The  name  of  the  Lord  is 
a  strong  tower.'  AVhat  a  tower  of  strength  that 
name  has  been  to  me  !  And  shall  it  not  con- 
tinue to  be  so  till  death,  in  judgment,  and 
throughout  eternity  ? 

"  Jan.  1,  1832. — Have  again  been  twice  at 
church,  first  in  the  Chapel  Royal,  where  I  saw 

their  Majesties,  and  heard  the  Bishop  of 

preach.  I  trust  the  truths  of  the  Gospel  may 
sometimes  bless  the  Royal  party,  but  certainly 
it  was  not  so  to-day.  I  felt  interested  in  our 
dueen,  who  seems  rehgiously  inclined. 

"  Jan.  15. — Have  again  listened  with  much 
pleasure  twice  to  Mr.  Elliot.  Sir  James  ar- 
rived here  in  perfect  safety  last  week,  and  my 
brother  George  is  also  with  us.  He  gave  a 
noble  proof  to-day  of  devotedness  to  the  King 
of  kings.  When  an  invitation  from  the  palace 
*  John  Page  Reade,  Esq.,  of  Stutton,  Suifolk,  her  son-in-law. 


172  LIFE    OP    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

came  for  him  to  dine  with  our  monarch  on  this 
sacred  day,  he  did  not  hesitate  a  moment  to 
send  a  refusal,  wiiich  he  did  in  most  respectful 
and  affectionate  terms.  How  this  will  be  taken 
it  is  impossible  to  say ;  but  I  rejoice  that  an 
opportunity  has  been  afforded  my  brother  of 
showing  his  sincerity  at  the  Court,  and  that  I 
have  a  brother  capal^le  of  acting  thus.  May 
the  Almiglity  bless  and  preserve  him  !" 

The  incident  to  which  the  foregoing  extract 
relates  afforded  great  delight  to  Lady  Colqu- 
houn.  Her  brother  was  staying  with  her  at 
the  time,  and  as  valued  relics  she  preserved 
the  card  of  invitation,  dated,  '^  Pavilion,  Jan. 
15,  1S32,"  and  a  copy  of  the  answer  which  she 
sought  leave  to  transcribe.  And  we  are  sure 
that  Sir  George  Sinclair  will  forgive  the  publi- 
cation of  that  letter  if  it  contribute,  however  re- 
motely, to  a  cause  which  he  has  much  at  heart. 

"  Sire, — No  one  can  value  more  highly  than 
I  do  the  honor  and  privilege  of  being  at  any 
time  permitted  to  enjoy  that  social  intercourse 
with  which  your  Majesty  has,  on  so  many 
occasions,  been  pleased  to  indulge  me  for  so 
many  years.     But  I  am  fully  aware  with  how 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  173 

much  consideration  your  Majesty  enters  into 
the  feelings  and  sympathizes  with  the  wishes 
of  those  whom  you  honor  with  your  friendship. 
I  have  for  some  time  past  been  led  to  entertain 
very  different  notions  from  those  which  I  once 
cherished  as  to  the  observance  of  this  day,  and 
subscribe  fully  to  the  views  which  the  Church, 
and  I  may  add,  the  legislature,  have  laid  down 
with  respect  to  its  importance.  Encouraged  by 
the  latitude  of  discussion  which  your  Majesty 
has  so  long  and  so  kindly  vouchsafed,  I  lately 
took  the  liberty,  though  in  opposition  to  your 
Majesty's  opinion,  to  maintain  that  not  merely 
a  part  but  the  luJiole  of  this  day  should  be 
devoted  to  those  great  purposes  for  which 
divine  authority  has  set  it  apart.  I  may  be 
permitted  to  add,  from  grateful  experience,  that 
this  decision  has  its  reward  even  here.  I  have 
found  that  God  honors  those  who  honor  him, 
and,  though  encompassed  with  sin  and  infirmi- 
ty, I  can  testif}",  that  he  is  not  an  austere 
Master,  that  he  has  strength  for  all  our  weak- 
nesses, indemnity  for  all  our  sacrifices,  and 
consolation  for  all  our  troubles. 

"  I  feel  bound,  on  principle  of  conscience,  to 
deny  myself,  what  is  always  one  of  my  most 
15* 


174  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

valued  gratifications,  that  of  paying  my  hum- 
ble and  most  affectionate  respects  this  day,  and 
must  rest  satisfied  with  renewing  in  my  retire- 
ment those  earnest  supphcations  for  your 
Majesty's  health  and  happiness  which  are 
equally  dictated  by  regard  for  the  public  wel- 
fare and  by  a  thankfully  cherished  remem- 
brance of  much  distinguislred  and  unmerited 

kindness. 

"  I  have  the  honor,"  &c. 

The  sequel  was  no  less  worthy  of  the  King. 
Next  morning,  whilst  they  were  seated  round 
the  breakfast  table,  a  royal  messenger  arrived 
charged  with  an  invitation  to  the  Pavihon  that 
evening.  His  Majesty  made  no  allusion  to 
the  letter  ;  but  to  show  how  perfectly  he  appre- 
ciated the  motives  of  his  guest,  he  went  beyond 
even  his  usual  urbanity  and  kindness  ;  and  to 
the  close  of  his  reign  no  interruption  occurred 
in  a  friendship  equally  honorable  to  the  accom- 
plished commoner  and  to  the  frank  and  warm- 
hearted monarch.  To  every  pious  subject  it 
must  also  be  a  source  of  lively  satisfaction  to 
know  that  in  the  Pavilion  itself  originated 
measures  which  have  materially  tended  to 
promote  the  better  observance  of  the  Sabbath 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN.  175 

in  Brighton.  It  is  said  that  there  were  certain 
arrangements  in  the  Royal  household  which 
undesignedly  entailed  a  large  amount  of  Sun- 
day labor ;  but  when  the  facts  were  repre- 
sented to  dueen  Adelaide,  she  immediately 
commanded  that  the  orders  in  question  should 
be  given  on  Monday  instead  of  Saturday  as 
heretofore ;  and  this  act  of  Christian  consider- 
ation has  been  extensively  copied,  to  the  great 
relief  of  many  a  laundress  who  formerly  could 
not  "  remember  the  Sabbath-day  to  keep  it 
holy."  In  unison  with  this  tribute  to  the 
Divine  command  was  the  injunction  of  our 
present  Queen,  forbidding  the  exhibition,  on 
the  Lord's-day,  of  the  state-apartments  at 
Windsor  Castle ;  an  act  which,  along  with 
Her  Majesty's  patronage  of  the  Sabbath-ob- 
servance movement  among  the  working  class- 
es, has  given  a  much-loved  Sovereign  an  addi- 
tional claim  to  the  gratitude  and  attachment 
of  a  Christian  people. 

And  here  we  may  notice  the  loyalty  of  Lady 
Colquhoun's  religion.  She  had  no  ambition  to 
"  dwell  in  kings'  houses,"  and  notwithstanding 
the  favor  in  which  both  her  father  and  brother 
stood  with  successive  sovereigns,   her  biogra- 


176  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ,UHOUN. 

pher  is  not  sure  that  she  was  ever  presented  at 
Court.  And  vv-hen  on  the  occasion  of  the 
Royal  visit  to  Edinburgli  in  1822,  her  husband 
went  to  do  homage  to  George  IV.,  from  aver- 
sion to  scenes  of  gaiety  and  grandeur  she  for- 
bore to  accompany  him.  But  frequent  al- 
lusions in  her  diary  showed  how  eagerly  she 
hailed  every  indication  of  piety  in  high  places, 
and  how  mindful  she  was  to  make  intercession 
for  kings  and  all  in  authority.  She  had  hnks 
of  attachment  to  the  throne  which  gave  to  her 
loyalty  a  sentiment  more  affectionate  than  the 
duteous  feeling  of  an  ordinary  subject ;  and  it 
would  be  well  for  the  land  if  the  same  personal 
and  prayerful  interest  in  its  rulers  were  shared 
by  a  larger  portion  of  the  religious  community. 

''London,  March  25,  1832.— We  returned 
here  last  night,  after  spending  a  few  days 
pleasantly  at  Mr.  Fuller  Maitland's.  We  are 
on  our  way  to  Stutton,  where  we  intend  being 
to-morrow.  At  Kingston,  I  went  with  Miss 
Massie  and  saw  my  beloved  lister's  grave  ;  it 
is  in  a  pretty  and  peaceful  resting-place.  The 
chancel  of  the  church  where  she  is  laid  is  ven- 
erable and  very  spacious  ;  there  she  will  arise 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  177 

at  the  resurrection  of  the  just.     I  have  felt  ani- 
mated and  invigorated  by  intercourse  with  the 
pious.     Oh  for  grace  to  follow  the  footsteps  of 
the  flock !     To-day  I  again  had  the  privilege 
of  hearing  Mr.  Howells,  and  having  a  pencil  I 
wrote  down  a  few  of  his  striking  observations. 
From  the  first  lesson  for  the  day  (Gen.  xxxix.) 
he  noticed  the  superiority  which  God's  people 
may  acquire  over  temptation  ;    that  our  best 
security  from  it  is  in  flight ;  that  the  reality  of 
our  principles    is   generally    in  some   way   or 
other  tried  ;  and  that  we  may  learn  from  this 
chapter  tenderness  to  delinquents,  which  Poti- 
phar  showed  to  Joseph,  believing  him  guilty. 
The  second   lesson   was   in   John   xii.  ;    from 
which  he  observed  that  our  Lord's  humiliation 
w^as  real,    and    not  like    man's,   who  is  often 
proud  of  it;  that  Christ's  death  was  as  neces- 
sary for  our  salvation  as  that  wheat  must  be 
put  into  the  ground  before  it  springs  again ; 
that  the  beauty  of  God  is  holiness,  and  how 
can  we   hope   to   attain   beauty  in  anything 
else  1     The  sermon  was  from  Jeremiah  xxxii. 
40.     He  said,  God  puts  his  fear  in  the  heart 
and  keeps  it   there.     The  will  of  God  is  all 
holy  and  good,  and  when  we  shall  know  all 


178  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

his  counsel  we  shall  rejoice  in  it  forever.  The 
fear  is  in  the  believer's  heart ;  his  whole  heart 
is  changed  to  love  what  God  loves.  He  has 
motives  to  fear  and  love  God  that  angels  have 
not.  They  were  not  redeemed  from  sin  and 
saved  b}^  Christ's  death  as  he  is.  Believers 
fear  God  from  his  moral  perfections.  They 
fear  him  in  his  providence.  Have  we  then 
seen  the  beauty  of  God  in  his  holiness  ?  Have 
we  experienced  the  pleasure  of  religion?  And 
do  we  rejoice  in  the  appointments  of  God? 
He  concluded  thus :  God  appoints  everything 
for  me^  I  know  it  is  best  for  me,  I  have  nothing 
to  do  with  it,  but  rest  satisfied  with  his  will. 
Everything  is  welcome  that  God  wills.  I  shall 
rejoice  in  it  hereafter,  and  I  will  rejoice  in  it 
7101V.  I  need  have  no  anxiety,  for  all  is  ar- 
ranged by  infinite  wisdom,  and  by  my  Father. 
"  Rossdhu,  June  10,  1832. — There  is  again 
no  sermon  in  this  parish,  and  again  I  am 
spending  the  day  happily  and  profitably.  En- 
joyed much  trust  and  confidence  in  prayer. 
Read  over  a  year  or  two  of  this  book, — the  lat- 
ter part  of  it ;  and  with  thankfulness  and 
pleasure  I  trace  that  religion  has  advanced 
during  the   last  twelve  months.     Before   this 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  179 

there  was  a  season  of  declension.  I  know 
well  by  whose  power  the  good  seed  is  pre- 
served ;  and  I  thank  God  and  take  courage. 
I  was  much  gratified  to  observe  more  attention 
to  religious  reading  in  my  family  than  com- 
mon. I  went  out  with  the  Bible  and  read 
at  the  side  of  the  lake,  with  much  pleasure, 
the  last  chapter  of  St.  Luke.  I  have  also  sat- 
isfaction in  the  instruction  of  my  maids,  who 
were  all  attentive  and  interested. 

"  Sept.  16,  1832. — I  hope  I  continue  in  a 
frame  of  mind  more  like  a  Christian,  than  I 
sometimes  experience,  but  I  am  far  from  mean- 
ing that  any  high  degree  of  devotional  feeling 
is  my  attainment.  My  best  days  are  thus 
spent  in  prayer  ;  I  feel  that  I  address  an  ex- 
alted Friend,  who,  I  believe,  listens  to  and  an- 
swers my  supplications.  I  feel  a  greater  sense 
of  the  reality  of  the  being  and  presence  of  God. 
I  go  from  prayer,  like  Hannah,  '  with  my  coun- 
tenance no  more  sad.'  I  feel  a  greater  solici- 
tude that  myself  and  others  should  do  the  will 
of  God.  I  feel  a  greater  satisfaction  in  think- 
ing of  God  and  a  future  state,  and  I  am  more 
reconciled  to  the  thoughts  of  leaving  the  world. 
And  then  all  seems  bright  and  cheering,  for  I 


180  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

commit  my  present  and  future  concerns  to  the 
guidance  of  Almighty  power  and  wisdom. 
Such  as  this,  is  the  most  I  know  of  experimen- 
tal religion :  ecstacies  or  any  rapturous  emo- 
tions were  never  mine.  Perfect,  Lord,  that 
which  concerneth  me  ! 

"  heamington^  Royal  Hotels  March  3,  1833. 
— I  have  been  here  more  than  a  week,  and  have 
reason  to  bless  God  for  many  things  regarding 
my  removal  from  home  and  the  state  of  heaUh 
in  which  I  found  my  dear  H — .  We  are  com- 
fortably settled  here,  and  I  commit  my  way  to 
the  Lord,  trusting  in  him.  My  religious  feel- 
ing has  been  very  low  of  late,  but  seems  to  re- 
vive in  some  degree  to-day.  I  have  not  been 
able  to  attend  public  worship,  having  caught  a 
bad  cold  on  the  journey. 

'•  March  17. — I  certainly  have  to  lament 
(yet  how  little,  in  truth,  do  I  feel  it !)  that  re- 
ligion is  at  a  very  ebb  low  with  me  at  present. 
I  have  been  twice  at  church  to-day,  and  in  the 
morning  heard  a  scriptural  sermon  from  Mj-. 
Pope  ;  but  I  have  little  feeling  of  the  truths  of 
the  Gospel.  In  the  evening  I  had  the  cham- 
ber-maids of  the  Hotel  up,  as  I  had  last  Lord's- 
day.  to  read  and  explain  to  them  from  the  Bi- 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN.  181 

ble,  and  I  was  interested  and  did  my  best  to 
make  the  way  of  salvation  plain  to  them.  I 
have  also  been  distributing  tracts  here." 

It  would  be  a  disastrous  winter  which  should 
surprise  us  in  midsummer ;  but  the  great  Crea- 
tor has  a  way  of  bringing  it  so  gently  on  that 
the  world  is  ready  for  its  arrival,  and  all  the 
better  for  its  visit.  The  day  shortens ;  the 
forest  seres ;  and  the  world  is  warned.  The 
air  cools ;  the  fervors  of  the  solstice  are  forgot- 
ten, and  before  the  frost  appears  the  world  is 
acclimatized.  And  by  a  process  somewhat 
similar,  when  grief  is  coming  our  Heavenly 
Father  often  forewarns  and  fortifies  his  chil- 
dren. So  was  it  with  the  subject  of  this  biog- 
raphy. In  her  serene  and  happy  domestic  life 
the  summer  was  now  past  and  the  harvest 
ending ;  but  God  forewarned  her.  She  saw 
with  steps  progressive,  though  not  startling, 
that  disease  advancing  which  was  to  summon 
from  beside  her  the  husband  of  her  youth ; 
and  the  impression  of  approaching  widowhood 
was  strengthened  by  a  dream  which  so  fastened 
in  her  memory  that  she  could  not  shake  it  out. 
But  she  had  a  still  better  preparation.  There 
16 


182  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

is  no  fence  against  the  storm  so  effectual  ag 
vigorous  health  and  a  pulse  firmly  bounding ; 
and  God  gave  her  the  preparation  of  soul-pros 
perity.  The  last  quotation  from  her  journal 
complains  of  languor ;  the  next  extracts  will 
show  how  delectation  and  trust  in  God  revived, 
and  how  by  beneficent  labors  she  was  regaining 
spiritual  tone  and  elasticity.  Nor,  in  connec- 
tion with  the  sequel,  will  the  reader  fail  to  ob- 
serve that  special  providence  which  called  her 
attention  so  seasonably  to  the  treatise  of  the 
good  old  Puritan. 

"  Rossdhu,  April  28.— When  thinking  over 
the  ways  of  providence,  I  saw  in  a  bookseller's 
shop  Flavel's  'Divine  Conduct  of  Providence.' 
Struck  with  the  title  I  bought  it.  Every  word 
came  home  to  my  heart  and  to  my  experience. 
Oh  let  me  praise  the  Lord  for  wonderful  com- 
passion to  a  poor  sinful  worm  !  I  feel  safe  in 
his  everlasting  arms,  and  in  believing  that  he 
will  perform  all  things  for  me. 

"  May  5. — To-day  I  am  at  home,  having  a 
cold,  or  probably  influenza,  which  is  all  over 
the  kingdom  at  present.  I  bless  God  that  rriy 
frame  of  mind,  although  not  particularly  lively 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  183 

in  religious  duty,  is  settled,  calm,  and  not 
without  interest  in  the  subject.  I  have  been 
enabled  to  pray  in  reality  and  to  commit  every 
concern  to  God,  and  to  view  him  ordering  all 
my  little  affairs  as  if  there  were  no  other  being 
to  care  for  in  the  universe.  It  is  thus  only 
that  we  can  bring  it  home  to  our  hearts  that 
the  great  God  careth  for  us  ;  for  we  are  apt  to 
imagine  that,  like  man.  He  cannot  manage  so 
much  at  once,  and  will  be  forgetful  of  what  is 
infinitely  interesting  to  his  creatures.  Flavel's 
book  on  Providence  continues  to  charm  me, 
being  completely  in  unison  with  all  my  expe- 
rience. All  that  he  says  I  have  known  and 
felt. 

"  June  2.— Since  writing  the  above  I  have 
been  in  Edinburgh,  with  Sir  James.  His 
medical  attendant  there  (Dr.  Wood)  has  pre- 
scribed various  remedies,  but  evidently  thinks 
seriously  of  his  complaints.  O  Lord,  fit  and 
prepare  him  and  me  for  whatever  may  be  thy 
will  respecting  him.  I  feel  assured  that  God 
is  ordering  everything  for  the  very  best  as 
regards  him  ;  and  one  thing  gives  me  the 
greatest  pleasure, — the  religious  impressions 
my  dear  husband  seems  to  feel. 


184  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

''  July  30. — I  was  at  chuixh  and  taught  the 
school.  Oh  !  forever  blessed  be  the  Lord  ! 
I  now  feel  as  if  on  a  rock,  as  if  God  will  as- 
suredly so  manage  every  concern  for  good  that 
no  evil  shall  ever  befall  me.  I  do  commit  my 
way  to  Him,  and  trust  also  in  Him.  The 
children  whom  I  teach  at  the  school  appear  in- 
terested, and  I  am  encouraged  to  hope  for  a 
spiritual  blessing  to  them.     Amen. 

"  October  27.— To-day  I  took  leave  of  the 
Sabbath-school,  the  days  being  too  short  to 
admit  of  teaching  it.  I  spoke  to  the  girls  as 
impressively  as  I  could,  and  was  happy  to  ob- 
serve the  greatest  interest  in  most  of  them. 
The  regular  scholars,  after  a  short  vacation, 
will  meet  for  religious  instructions  on  Mon- 
days. I  rejoiced  this  Sabbath  in  the  Lord, 
who  performeth  all  things  for  me,  and  in  whom 
I  am  complete.  Nothing  beside  him  have  I  to 
trust  to  for  temporal  or  spiritual  benefits, — yet 
what  more  would  I  desire  than  a  Divine  Re- 
dee'tner  7 

"  Jan.  12,  1834. — Have  heard  of  the  death 
of  my  dear  Christian  sister-in-law,  Mrs.  Camp- 
bell, of  Stonefield.  She  died  at  Pau,  full  of 
peace  and  hope.     She  will  be  an  irreparable 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  185 

loss  to  her  family,  and  a  real  loss  to  me. 
May  I  be  enabled  to  follow  her  steps,  for  they 
lead  to  glory  ! 

"  Edinhurgh^  April  6. — Was  much  gratified 
last  week  by  finding  that  my  little  work,  '  Im- 
pressions of  the  Heart,'  is  completely  sold  off 
and  out  of  print,  and  that  another  edition  is 
called  for.  To  me  it  is  a  very  pleasing  thought 
that  it  is  now  in  the  hands  of  so  many.  I  feel 
a  hope  that  the  Lord  will  use  me  for  his  glory. 
I  thank  God  and  take  courage  in  the  prosecu- 
tion of  the  work  I  am  now  writing.  Neither 
will  be  published  till  next  winter,  as  this  town 
will  soon  empty  now. 

"  Rossd/m,  April  20. — Once  more  settled  in 
our  beautiful  abode,  where  nature,  or  rather 
nature's  God,  has  done  so  much  to  charm  the 
eye.  I  have  much  reason  for  gratitude  that 
my  dear  husband  has  been  so  much  benefited 
by  medical  advice  while  in  Edinburgh.  We 
have  all  returned  in  prosperous  circumstances; 
but  I  am  detained  at  home  to-day  by  a  rheu- 
matic pain  in  the  face,  which  has  been  trouble- 
some for  more  than  a  week.  This  forenoon  it 
is  easier  ;  and,  along  with  the  Bible,  I  have 
been  reading  Neff's  interesting  '  Memoir.' 
16* 


186  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

Have  felt  rather  stupid  and  sleepy ;  but  our 
merciful  High  Priest  is  touched  with  a  feeling 
of  our  infirmities. 

"  May  18. — 1  was  enlivened  in  religious 
respects  last  week  by  a  visit,  for  a  single  night, 
from  good  Dr.  Malan,  of  Geneva.  It  is  now 
eight  years  since  he  was  here  before ;  and 
although  I  was  not  so  much  impressed  by  his 
conversation  as  I  then  was,  still  I  think  I  was 
sensibly  benefited  by  it.  I  am  led  at  present 
to  live  nearer  to  God,  with  a  more  simple 
dependence  upon  him  for  everything.  This 
day  I  was  more  spiritually  minded  than  last 
Sabbath,  and  employed  myself  as  usual. 

"  Dec.  7. — Experienced  real  joy  this  morning 
in  considering  that  some  works  of  mercy  I 
lately  performed  are  acceptable  and  pleasing  to 
God.  This  was  no  self-righteous  feehng  ;  for 
I  well  know  with  how  much  sin  all  I  do  is 
mingled:  but  it  was  dehght  in  thinking  I  had 
pleased  my  best  Friend.  I  continue  happy  in 
communion  with  him,  and  trusting  in  his  grace. 

"May  3,  1835.— My  kind  Christian  friend, 
Dr.  Hamilton,  of  Strathblane,  is,  alas  !  no  more. 
He  died,  after  a  short  illness,  a  fortnight  ago. 
Last  week  I  paid  my  first  visit  to  the  prison  at 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  187 

Dumbarton.  I  have  undertaken  to  superintend 
the  female  prisoners.  May  a  blessing  rest  on 
my  poor  endeavors  1" 

It  was  by  the  excellent  Mrs.  Fry  that  Lady 
Colquhoun  was  first  enlisted  in  the  arduous 
business  of  prison-visitation.  In  a  letter  written 
to  Mrs.  Reade  about  this  period  she  alludes  to 
these  labors : — 

"  I  was  very  much  interested  in  the  poor 
depraved  boy,  and  have  succeeded  in  obtaining 
permission  to  have  him  taught  to  read,  about 
which  I  was  very  anxious,  as  in  this  way  access 
would  be  got  to  his  mind.  And  much  to  my 
gratification  I  have  got  a  very  fit  person  to 
teach  him.  He  is  a  schoolmaster  in  the  place, 
and  enters  zealously  into  the  business.  He 
went  to  see  his  scholar  when  I  was  there,  and 
said  he  had  never  met  with  such  deplorable 
ignorance.  The  youth  had  never  seen  a  Bible, 
had  never  heard  of  a  God,  excepting  to  hear 
his  name  taken  in  vain,  and  had  never  entered 
a  church.  His  master  is  to  strive  to  instruct 
him  in  religion  along  with  the  A,  B,  C.  I  also 
visited  the  poor  woman  the  day  before  she  was 


188  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

liberated.  She  received  me  with  great  pleasure, 
said  she  '  had  been  through  the  book  I  gave 
her,  three  times,'  and  expressed  much  gratitude 
for  some  tracts  I  left  with  her.  I  asked  if  she 
would  read  them.  'Yes  ma'am,  that  I  Avill,' 
said  she,  '  and  take  them  wi'  me  wherever  I 
go.'  She  is  poor,  and  after  thinking  whetlier  I 
ought  to  give  her  money  or  not,  as  she  is  rather 
too  covetous!  I  ventured  to  give  her  half-a- 
crown,  thinking  she  might  have  nothing  when 
she  left  the  prison.  This  quite  overcame  her, 
and  she  only  said,  '  Ma'am,  I  do  7iot  deserve  it,' 
with  tears  in  her  eyes." 

'■'■July  12. — I  have  seen  much  since  last  I 
wrote  here,"  the  journal  resumes,  "having 
been  with  Sir  James  and  Sarah  in  Ireland.  I 
spent  two  Sabbaths  very  happily  there, — the 
first  in  Dublin,  where  I  heard  Mr.  Matthias, 
of  Bethesda  Chapel,  preach,  and  Mr.  Stewart, 
of  Union  Chapel,  both  dear  servants  of  God. 
The  sermon  of  the  latter,  on  the  influences  of 
the  Spirit,  came  home  to  my  heart ;  and  the 
whole  service,  which  was  in  the  Presbyterian 
form,  seemed  to  do  me  good.  The  next  Sab- 
bath we  were  at  Cushendall,  on  our  way  to 
the  Giant's  Causeway, — a  sweet  little  village, 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN.  189 

and  where  there  is  a  Gospel  ministry.  I  en- 
joyed the  whole  day,  and  my  heart  seemed 
alive  and  happy.  I  distributed  some  tracts  in 
poor  Ireland,  which  were  gladly  received,  even 
by  the  Catholics.  On  our  return  to  Belfast,  I 
was  gratified  to  meet  some  apparently  very 
serious  Christians,  in  a  shop  of  the  name  of 

M' .     One  of  the  sisters  gave  me  a  phial 

of  their  lavender  water  as  a  remembrance. 

^^  Sept.  13. — Have  been  in  Edinburgb,  where 
my  dear  husband's  health  called  me.  He 
consulted  Dr.  Abercrombie  and  Dr.  Wood. 
The  opinion  of  both  seems  to  be,  that  his  com- 
plaints are  alarming.  I  have  long  thought  so. 
Oh  !  may  the  Almighty  fit  him  for  death,  if 
such  is  His  will,  and  give  me  strength  of  body 
and  mind  for  whatever  scenes  await  me. 

^'Sept.  20. — My  dear  Sir  James  having  been 
worse  than  usual,  we  have  fixed  on  going  to 
Edinburgh  to  reside,  on  Tuesday  next.  This 
is,  therefore,  my  last  Sabbath  here  for  the 
present ;  and,  alas  !  it  appears  to  me  probable 
that  the  term  when  I  inhabited  this  retired 
and  beautiful  abode  is  now  about  to  end.  If 
so,  tbe  Almighty  will  again  fix  the  bounds  of 
my  habitation,  and  I  shall  be  where  it  is  best  I 


190  LIFE    OF    LADY    COiaUHOUN. 

should.  I  have  endeavored  to  call  my  beloved 
husband's  attention  to  what  I  conceive  to  be 
his  real  state,  and  I  have  the  heartfelt  satis- 
faction to  see  him  anxious  to  prepare  for  life 
or  death.  To-day  I  remained  at  home  with 
him.  Everything  regarding  our  removal  to 
Edinburgh  seems  providentially  arranged.  My 
God  continues  good. 

"110,  Pi^inces-street,  Edinburgh,  SejJt.  27. 
— We  have  been  here  for  some  days,  and  all 
has  been  mercifully  ordered  respecting  our 
removal.  My  dear  husband  is,  on  the  whole, 
better,  and  has  been  able  to-day  to  attend  in 
a  small  chapel  in  Young-street,  where  we 
have  got  seats,  and  where  a  truly  pious  young 
man,  of  the  name  of  Moody,  preaches.  I 
have  felt  rather  enlivened  from  his  preaching 
and  prayers,  for  I  have  been  dull  and  dead  in 
a  great  measure  to  spiritual  things.  One 
thought  has  cheered  me, — that  it  appears  to 
me  I  could  give  up  everything  here  for  God, 
were  I  called  to  it,  and  did  I  see  Him  as  He  is. 
I  think  I  shall  soon  require  all  the  cons^olation 
the  Gospel  affords,  and  I  shall  rot  need  with- 
out  enjoying   it.      He   who   has  brought   me 


191  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ,UHOUN. 

hitherto,  and  supported  me  in  every  emergen- 
cy, will  continue  to  do  so  to  the  end. 

"  Sunday^  Nov.  1. — Since  writing  here  this 
day  fortnight,  there  is  no  very  material  change 
in  my  dear  charge.  I  am  still  passing  through 
the  dark  scene  of  my  nearest  earthly  relation's 
death,  or  rather  its  forerunners.  He  has  talked 
to  me  frequently  of  his  religious  hopes.  He  lies 
like  a  little  child  at  the  foot  of  the  cross.  He 
says  he  is  willing  to  be  saved  in  Christ's  own 
way,  and  to  serve  God  to  all  eternity,  and  to 
cast  his  crown  at  the  foot  of  the  Lamb  as 
humbly  as  any  in  heaven.  I  have  always 
prayed,  at  least  to  see  him  die  in  the  Lord,  and 
trust  my  merciful,  forgiving  Saviour  has  re- 
ceived him  into  the  number  of  his  own.  This 
is  the  sacrament  Sabbath  here.  I  am  unable 
to  leave  Sir  James  long,  but  mean  to  attend  a 
table  service  in  St.  George's,  and  perhaps  the 
evening  sermon. 

"/a?i.  3,  1836. — This  new  year  has  come 
mournfully  in  to  me, — my  father  just  dead,  my 
husband  without  hope  of  recovery  !  But  still 
the  Lord  liveth  !  Blessed,  said  the  Psalmist, 
be  my  Rock  !  God  is  indeed  a  Refuge  from 
the  storm.     O  that  I    could  lean  more  on  a 


192  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

Foundation  so  sure  !     There  is  no  risk  that  it 
will  totter,  or  fail  me. 

"24^/i. — Still  my  dear  Sir  James  lives.  He 
is  the  shadow  of  what  he  was.  His  medical 
attendants  give  me  no  hope  that  he  will  long 
survive.  Perhaps  ere  this  hallowed  day  re- 
turns, he  may  be  gone  to  the  house  appointed 
for  all  living,  and  his  spirit  may  be  rejoicing 
among  the  blessed.  I  wait  the  sovereign  will 
of  my  Lord,  and  believe  that  He  is  doing  well. 
Last  night,  in  reading  a  sermon  of  my  late 
worthy  pastor,  Dr.  Buchanan,  I  was  reminded 
of  his  practical  piety ;  and  the  beauty  of  the 
Gospel  precepts  captivated  me.  I  remembered 
former  days,  when  the  purity  of  the  lessons  of 
God's  Word  was  so  much  my  delight.  I  felt 
as  if  I  had  lost  ground,  and  earnestly  prayed 
to  grow  and  shine  in  universal  holiness." 

Mournfully  passed  that  long  winter ;  nor 
were  their  toils  who  watched  over  the  sufferer 
cheered  by  any  hope  of  recovery.  "  The  post 
of  observation  darkened  every  hour ;"  and  to 
affection  it  made  the  trial  greater  that  the 
mental  faculties  at  last  partook  of  the  body's 
extreme  exhaustion,  and  left  little  power  of 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  193 

intercourse.  But  to  Lady  Colquhoun  it  was  a 
ceaseless  comfort,  and  it  helped  to  inspire  her 
fervent  prayers,  that  up  to  the  last  hour  of  con- 
sciousness her  beloved  husband  listened  with 
meek  earnestness  to  every  portion  of  Scripture 
which  she  read,  and  joined  devoutly  in  every 
petition  offered  in  his  hearing ;  whilst  in  pros- 
pect of  his  coming  change,  he  uniformly  de- 
clared that  the  Saviour  was  his  only  hope. 
During  these  silent  watchings  word  was 
brought  that  her  venerable  father  was  laid 
aside  from  his  long  and  patriotic  labors  ;  and, 
throughout  his  brief  decline,  Sir  James  found 
a  melancholy  source  of  interest  in  the  com- 
munications which  daily  went  and  came  be- 
twixt their  sick-rooms. 

On  the  21st  of  December  Lady  Colquhoun 
spent  some  time  with  her  father,  and  in  the 
course  of  conversation  he  expressed  a  wish 
that  she  would  affix  her  name  to  her  pubhca- 
tions.  Two  hours  afterwards  the  tidings  of 
his  death  gave  touching  import  to  the  inter- 
view, and  added  to  the  request  the  solemnity 
of  a  dying  charge.  Sir  John  w^as  gathered  to 
his  fathers  from  the  midst  of  a  hale  old  age 
and  its  cheerful  occupations ;  and  in  a  few 
17 


194  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

weeks  some  of  the  mourners  who  encircled  his 
grave  in  Holyrood  Chapel,  were  called  to  join 
the  sable  procession  which,  up  the  Yale  of 
Leven,  and  through  the  solemnized  hamlets, 
conveyed  to  the  ancestral  cemetery  the  dust 
of  his  son-in-law.  As  it  passed,  one  aged 
clansman  was  propped  up  in  bed,  and  when  he 
saw  the  hearse  containing  the  lifeless  form  of 
his  much-loved  landlord,  the  old  man  fainted 
away  ;  and  everywhere  was  manifested  the 
emotion  of  a  people  reverential  to  old  lineage, 
and  grateful  to  the  proprietor  wiiom  constant 
residence  had  converted  into  their  friend  and 
protector.  It  was  a  fine  winter's  day,  and  the 
sunshine  had  suspended  the  frost,  when,  round 
the  o]d  "  chapel,"  were  congregated  the  ten- 
antry of  Luss,  Row,  and  Arrochar,  as  well  as 
many  friends,  and  the  gentlemen  of  the  coun- 
ty, and,  borne  on  the  shoulders  of  three 
Grants  and  three  Colquhouns,  the  coffin  was 
lowered  into    its     appropriate    resting-place.* 

*  Sir  John  Sinclair  died  Dec.  21,  1835,  aged  eighty-one. 
Sir  James  Colquhoun  died  Feb.  3,  1836,  aged  sixty-one.  ITie 
usage  above  mentioned  has  obtained  since  the  time  of  Sir 
James  Grant.  He  married  Anne  Colquhoun,  heiress  of  Luss. 
Their  eldest  son  succeeded  to  the  Grant  estate,  and  was  an 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  195 

Soon  after,  the  sanctuary  where  so  many  gen- 
erations sleep  was  set  in  order,  and  in  its  roof- 
less solitude,  or  beneath  the  shadow  of  its  co- 
eval evergreens,  the  widowed  survivor  often 
lingered  ;  and  there  she  often  mused  on  the 
day  when,  in  the  rising  of  His  redeemed,  the 
Saviour  shall  complete  His  own  resurrection^ 
and  consummate  their  felicity. 

The  following  is  the  passage  in  the  journal 
which  records  this  most  solemn  occurrence  in 
her  personal  history  : — 

''Feb.  7,  1836.— At  length  my  fears  are 
realized  !  He  to  whom  I  was  related  by  the 
nearest  earthly  tie,  departed  this  life  on  Wed- 
nesday the  3d,  and  has  left  me  to  mourn  his 
loss.  I  was  indeed  long  prepared  for  the  blow; 
yet  nature  will  feel,  nor  are  we  forbidden  to 
weep.  I  dread  being  more  sensible  to  the 
affliction  hereafter,  as  there  is  a  bustle  incident 
to  such  a  time  which  has  a  tendency  to  divert 
the  mind,  and,  alas  !  to  rob  us  of  the  improve- 
ment we  might  derive  from  it.  Apparently 
my  beloved  husband  suffered  for  fourteen  hours 

ancestor  of  the  Earl  of  Seafield ;  their  second  son  succeeded 
to  the  estate  and  baronetage  of  Colquhoun. 


196  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

before  rather  severely ;  but  his  medical  attend- 
ants assured  me  that  from  want  of  conscious- 
ness he  was  not  sensible  of  pain.  Yesterday 
the  dear  remains  were  deposited  in  the  coffin  ; 
I  loved  to  look  at  them,  and  feel  grieved  that 
they  must  be  removed  from  my  care.  The 
key  of  the  room  I  kept,  and  many  times  I  had 
looked  on  the  countenance,  which  fully  retained 
the  likeness,  and  was  placid  and  serene.  O 
Lord,  I  would  trust  that  he  is  justified  freely 
by  thy  grace,  that  he  is  accepted  without 
money  and  without  piice.  This  was  all  his 
hope  and  all  his  desire.  And  now  be  to  me  a 
husband,  a  father,  a  sanctifier,  a  strong  tower 
to  which  I  may  continually  resort.  All  my 
hope  centres  in  thee,  my  God,  my  all !" 

It  was  during  this  sad  and  anxious  winter 
that  the  new  edition  of  her  "  Impressions''  was 
published,  as  well  as  a  companion  volume, 
entitled  "The  Kingdom  of  God."'  In  obedi- 
ence to  both  her  father  and  husband  she  now 
overcame  her  natural  sensitiveness  and  placed 
her  name  on  the  title-page ;  and  there  can  be 
no  doubt  that  this  authentication  added  weight 
and  interest  to  works  which  the  religious  com- 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  197 

munity  had  already  learned  to  appreciate. 
How  little  of  literary  vanity  mingled  with 
what  was  truly  a  Christian  sacrifice  may  be 
seen  from  the  following  extract : — - 

"  Jan.  10,  1836. — Last  week  I  did  what  I 
never  expected  to  do.  I  gave  my  name  to  the 
pubhc  as  the  authoress  of  my  books  !  Not  two 
hours  before  he  died,  my  father  requested  that 
I  should  do  so,  and  my  dear  husband  always 
wished  it ;  so  that,  from  concurring  circum- 
stances, I  have  thought  it  the  will  of  God. 
And  now,  O  my  God  !  for  thy  honor  and  the 
good  of  men  I  have  made  some  sacrifice ; 
therefore  in  mercy  use  my  works  to  promote 
these  glorious  purposes." 

Amidst  many  communications  received  from 
sympathizing  friends  during  that  sorrowful 
spring,  none  was  more  welcome  than  the  letter 
of  her  true-hearted  correspondent  in  Canada, 
Mrs.  Charles  Scott.  It  is  dated  from  the 
"Cottage  of  the  Falls,  U.  C,  April  25, 
1836  :— 

•'Need  I  tell  you  with  what  deep  interest  I 
read  your  letter  from  Edinburgh,  my  very  dear 
17* 


198  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ,UHOUN. 

Lady  Colquhoun.  It  was  long  on  the  way,  but 
the  sight  of  your  handwriting  gladdened  my 
heart  in  this  distant  land,  when  it  did  arrive. 
It  tells  me  of  affliction,  of  the  Lord's  hand 
being  at  work,  but  shows  me,  at  tlie  same  time, 
a  mind  resting  on  the  Rock  of  Ages,  a  heart 
supported  by  the  everlasting  arms,  and  much, 
very  much  sweetness  mingled  in  the  cup  ad- 
ministered by  the  hand  of  Love.  I  cannot  tell 
you,  dear  Lady  C,  how  much  I  long  for  further 
accounts  of  you.  Your  venerable  father's 
death  I  had  seen  an  account  of  in  the  news- 
papers. But  your  threatened  affliction  in  Sir 
James's  illness,  I  had  not  heard  of,  and  do  not 
now  know  if  it  may  have  pleased  our  Lord  to 
give  an  unexpected  turn  to  his  illness,  or  if 
you  are  a  '  widow  indeed.'  If  such  is  the  case, 
I  have  not  the  slightest  doubt  that  you  con- 
tinue to  find  our  faithful  God  very  present  with 
you,  leading  you  to  experience  the  fulness  of 
many  promises,  which  before  you  read  and  be- 
lieved, but  had  no  opportunity  experimentally  to 
prove.  He  who  has  been  precious  to  you,  and 
present  with  you  so  long,  who  gave  you  quiet- 
ness of  soul  in  the  midst  of  outward  trouble, 
will,  I  doubt  not,  continue  uncep,singly  so  to  the 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  199 

end.  This  I  know,  but  yet  I  long  much  to 
hear  particulars  from  yourself.  What  a  strong 
foundation  the  Christian  stands  upon,  for  time, 
as  well  as  for  eternity.  God  in  Christ  includes 
all  that  can  be  desired ;  and  though  our  sins 
may  appear  deeper  and  darker  each  year  that 
passes  over,  yet  it  does  not  seem  to  depress,  but 
to  raise  the  heart  in  increased  thankfulness  to 
Him  who  pardons  them  all,  who  '  blots  out,  as 
a  thick  cloud,  our  transgressions,  and  as  a 
cloud  our  sins.'  ....  This  situation,  so  far  as 
temporal  matters  are  concerned,  is  most  desira- 
ble for  a  summer  residence.  Nothing  can  ex- 
ceed the  grandeur  of  the  Falls,  and  no  pen 
could  give  the  least  idea  of  them.  We  are 
within  about  ten  minutes'  walk  of  the  upper 
bank,  and  the  view  from  this  cottage  is  very 
beautiful :  the  rapids  of  the  Niagara  river  just 
above  the  Falls,  dashing  on  in  continued  foam, 
till  lost  in  the  dense  body  of  spray,  generally 
ascending  from  the  Falls.  The  winter  has 
been  the  most  severe  experienced  for  twenty 
years,  the  thermometer  varying  from  zero  to 
16'  below  it.  Extremely  unpleasant  such  cold 
is  to  the  feeling,  but  it  has  pleased  God  to  con- 
tinue us  all  in  good  healtlL" 


CHAPTER  V. 


FORGETTING  THOSE  THINGS  WHICH  ARE  BEHIND,  AND  REACHING 
FORTH  UNTO  THOSE  THINGS  WHICH  ARE  BEFORE,  I  PRESS 
TOWARD  THE  MARK  FOR  THE  PRIZE  OF  THE  HIGH  CALLING 
OF  GOD  IN  CHRIST  JESUS. PHILIPPIANS  IIL  13,  14. 


Since  the  dear  hour  that  brought  me  to  thy  foot, 

And  cut  up  all  my  follies  by  the  root, 

I  never  trusted  in  an  arm  but  thine, 

Nor  hoped  but  in  thy  righteousness  divine. 

My  prayers  and  alms, — 

Forgive  their  evil,  and  accept  their  good ; 

I  cast  them  at  thy  feet — my  only  plea 

Is  what  it  was,  dependence  upon  thee  : 

While  strugghng  in  the  vale  of  tears  below, 

That  never  fail'd,  nor  shall  it  fail  me  now. 

cowper's  "trutu." 


Gently  as  Lady  Colqohoun  woke  up  to 
her  bereavement,  and  notwithstanding  the  re- 
doultled  assiduities  of  an  affectionate  family, 
the  desolate  reality  sometimes  overpowered 
her  ]  and,  though  still  able  to  regard  it  as  her 
home,  her  retvun  to  Rossdhu  next  spring  re- 
vived in  all  its  anguish  the  woful  consciousness 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLGIUHOUN.  201 

of  widowhood.  And  it  was  many  a  day  be- 
fore the  blight  landscape  shone  again  through 
that  thick  crape  in  which  grief  had  veiled  it. 
Long  afterwards  we  find  her  recording,^"  I 
feel  the  loss  of  my  very  dear  husband's  society 
more  than  I  did  shortly  after  his  death.  To  me 
there  is  an  inexpressible  blank  in  this  house, 
and  I  would  gladly  leave  it.  However,  I  ought 
to  be  thankful  for  the  many  mercies  which 
still  surround  me,  and  should  cast  my  care  on 
my  covenant  God,  believing  that  he  does 
right."  Nor  did  her  covenant  God  forsake  her. 
Mournfully  released  from  her  long  ministra- 
tions in  the  sick-room,  and  no  longer  called  to 
discharge  those  multifarious  duties  which  she 
had  so  thoroughly  and  gracefully  fulfilled,  "  her 
Maker  was  her  husband,"  and  she  gave  her- 
self to  the  Lord's  work  with  new  consecration. 
In  Sept.  of  that  year  she  writes  to  her  married 
daughter  : — 

"  I  should  have  particularly  hked  to  be  more 
alone  when  Mr.  Moody  was  here  ;  but  who 
knows  but  a  blessing  might  be  sent  to  others 
through  his  visit  ?  He  came  very  opportunely  to 
help  me  about  my  favorite  plan — the  chapel  at 


202  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

Helensburgh.  Mr.  M.  got  quite  interested  in 
the  subject,  and  in  Glasgow  went  to  different 
influential  clergymen  to  state  the  matter  to 
them.  They  said,  so  liberal  a  proposal  should 
never  be  rejected,  though  it  were  only  to  set  an 
example  to  other  landed  proprietors ;  and  one 
said  that  for  a  long  time  he  had  heard  of  noth- 
ing which  gave  him  so  great  pleasure.  So  I 
Jrust  yet  to  make  it  out.  Another  church  also 
interests  me  much  at  present.    One  of  James's, 

in   Caithness   (W n),  has  become   vacant. 

The  son  of  the  late  incumbent  seems  so  very 
superior  a  young  man,  that,  however  much  I 
am  opposed  to  the  '  hereditary  succession,'  I 
think  he  will  be  the  minister.  J.  appears  to 
leave  it  entirely  to  me  to  decide,  and,  thanks 
be  to  God  for  so  great  a  blessing  as  the  power 
of  placing  in  this  parish  a  devoted  pastor. 
This  is  a  long  story  about  churches  ;  but,  oh, 
dear  H.,  my  heart  is  full  of  the  subject.  The 
interest  I  feel  in  religion  deepens,  and  fain 
would  I  impart  somewhat  of  it  to  those  who 
are  dear  to  me.  I  feel  that  the  time  to  im- 
prove for  this  purpose  is  short ;  that  '  the  night 
Cometh  when  no  man  can  work  ;'  and  earnestly 
do  I  pray  that  my  H.  may  be  brought  to  the 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  203 

foot  of  the  cross,  there  to  seek  and  to  find  that 
satisfaction  of  spirit  which  she  will  find  in 
nothing  else." 

Helensburgh  is  a  much-frequented  watering- 
place  on  the  estuary  of  the  Clyde,  and  within 
the  Luss  estate  ;  and  the  scheme  for  providing 
it  with  a  chapel  of  its  own  was  the  first  of 
several  Church-extension  movements  to  which 
Lady  Colquhoun  largely  contributed.  The 
chapel  of  her  Edinburgh  pastor,  Mr.  Moody, 
was  another,  and  though  these  erections  were 
soon  forfeited  to  a  very  different  ministry  from 
that  which  the  pious  donors  contemplated — ■ 
nowise  disheartened,  with  the  new  emergency 
she  redoubled  her  munificence  ;  and  after  this 
she  was  so  impressed  with  the  spiritual  destitu- 
tion of  overgrown  towns  and  manufacturing 
villages,  that  it  became  a  ruling  object  in  her 
life  to  provide  more  Christian  teachers  and 
more  sanctuaries.  Like  the  father  of  church- 
builders,*  she  could  not  'give  sleep  to  her  eyes,' 
till  she  '  found  out  habitations  for  the  mighty 
God  ;'  and,  like  the  projector  of  the  temple,  her 
devout  intentions  and  self-denying  gifts  were 
requited  with  soul-prosperity. 
*  Psalm  cxxxii. 


204  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

In  her  Sabbath-school  she  now  formed  an 
adult  class,  and  adopted  a  system,  which  she 
thus  announces  to  Mrs.  Reade ; — 

"  I  have  begun  a  new  plan  at  our  school  on 
Sundays — a  class  for  grown-up  girls.  They 
commit  nothing  to  memory.  But  I  explain 
the  Bible  and  Catechism.  I  adopted  it  in  con- 
sequence of  seeing  Mr.  Moody's  on  Monday 
evenings.  The  class  is  flourishing  and  always 
increasing.  Several  old  people  attend  regu- 
larly, and  I  hope  to  have  more.  My  own 
maids  also  asked  leave  to  go ;  so,  with  the 
children,  I  have  a  pretty  large  congregation, 
and  it  needs  some  nerve.  But  I  hope  to  be 
enabled  to  go  on,  and  1  hear  it  is  much  liked. 
May  God  send  a  blessing  !" 

These  "  Horse  Sabbaticae"  were  not  only 
very  popular,  but  became  extremely  useful. 
During  the  week  her  Ladyship  studied  with 
much  care  the  passage  which  she  intended  to 
explain,  and  exerted  herself  in  finding  anec- 
dotes and  illustrations  which  might  render  it 
more  interesting  and  memorable.  Her  man- 
ner was  full  of  calm  benevolence  and  mild 
persuasion ;  and  whatever  nervousness  she 
might  feel,  her  address  was  so  fluent,  natural, 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  205 

and  dignified,  that  the  thoughts  of  the  audience 
were  solely  directed  to  the  subject.  In  unison 
Avith  that  devout  and  holy  life  which  they  all 
knew  that  their  kind  instructress  led,  these  ex- 
hortations were  singularly  impressive.  On  a 
dying  bed  more  than  one  of  her  young  hearers 
gave  evidence  of  having  been  by  this  means 
brought  to  the  Saviour ;  and  from  the  grateful 
tenderness  in  which  many  of  the  survivors 
hold  their  teacher's  memory,  it  may  be  hoped 
that  all  her  "  works''  have  not  yet  "  followed" 
her.  It  is  to  these  Sabbath-evening  exercises 
that  the  following  entries  in  her  Journal 
refer : — 

''Bossdhu,  July  30,  1837.— My  Sabbaths 
are  now  much  occupied  in  preparing  to  address 
my  class,  which  I  do  at  some  length.  Every 
week  it  has  increased,  and  though  we  had  two 
additional  benches  to-day,  there  was  scarcely 
room  enough  for  them.  I  am  much  encour- 
aged, and  this  morning  prayed  so  earnestly  for 
a  blessing,  that  I  feel  confident  it  shall  be  given. 
Earnest  prayer  is  a  gift,  and  is  bestowed  when 
God  designs  to  hear.  I  always  feel  fagged  in 
the  evening  afterwards,  and  can  do  little. 
18 


206  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

"  August  6. — Being  Arrochar  sacrament,  no 
sermon  at  Luss.  I  was,  as  usual,  occupied 
with  the  school.  There  were  fewer  this  even- 
ing, as  many  of  them  had  gone  to  Arrochar. 
My  God  was  present  in  prayer  at  night.  Last 
week  my  son  James  was  elected  Member  for 
the  county.  John  and  his  family  leave  us  to- 
morrow. 

"  ^ept.  3. — Have  little  to  say  to-day  but 
that  I  was  much  gratified  by  a  very  large  at- 
tendance at  the  school.  There  was  scarcely 
room  for  any  more,  and  there  must  have  been 
above  sixty  present.  I  likewise  observe  with 
great  pleasure  the  appearance  of  interest  in 
some  who  attend  ;  in  one  or  two  I  think  I  can 
scarcely  be  mistaken.  Have  been  much  as- 
sisted in  preparation  for  my  class,  and,  at  the 
time,  in  speaking  to  them  and  in  prayer.  To- 
night feel  inspirited,  yet  cannot  say  that  devo- 
tional feeling  is  strong. 

"  17. — Lady  Sinclair,  and  Diana  and  Cathe- 
rine are  here.  They  went  with  me  to  the 
school  and  appeared  much  pleased.  The 
children  proved  a  number  of  doctrines  very 
well. 

"  October  8. — Have  prayed  very  earnestly 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  207 

to-day,  and  with  great  pleasure  have  read  the 
'Life  of  Brainerd.'  At  the  school  had  a  good 
attendance.  Went  to  bed  joyful,  the  words, 
'  He  that  believeth  on  the  Son  hath  everlasting 
life,'  being  delightfully  impressed  on  my  mind. 
The  freeness  of  redemption,  and  the  simplicity 
of  believing  came  to  me  with  clearness,  so  that 
I  could  not  but  say,  I  do  believe  I  have  ever- 
lasting life. 

"  15. — Penitence  was  in  exercise  this  morn- 
ing. It  was  the  last  day  of  my  class,  which  I 
have  been  enabled  to  continue  for  four  months 
without  a  Sabbath's  intermission.  Now  it 
darkens  too  soon  after  church  to  admit  of  its 
being  kept  up  any  longer.  A  great  many  were 
present.  I  felt  affected  in  speaking  to  them, 
and  thought  they  appeared  so  too.  Lord,  bless 
this  attempt  to  save  souls  and  glorify  thy 
name  !  It  is  a  pleasure  to  me  to  think  it  has 
been  made,  and  God  has  wonderfully  assisted 


Should  any  one  be  moved  by  this  example 
to  make  an  effort  in  his  own  locality,  he  may 
find  instruction  in  her  Ladyship's  procedure,  as 
well  as  an  incentive  in  her  Ladyship's  success. 


208  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLdUHOUN. 

Allowing-  something  for  the  rank,  and  some- 
thins:  more  for  the  talent  of  the  teacher,  her 
usefulness  was  mainly  owing  to  her  affection, 
her  prayerfulness,  her  diligence,  and  her  hope- 
fulness. She  loved  her  humble  neighbors,  and 
instead  of  coming  forth  to  dispense  a  weekly 
lecture  or  reproof,  she  re-appeared  amongst 
them  from  week  to  week,  with  the  law  of 
kindness  on  her  lips  and  cordiality  in  every 
feature,  and  in  each  earnest  statement  and 
solemn  entreaty,  they  recognized  their  friend 
and  well-wisher.  But  before  she  came  to  them 
she  had  been  to  God,  and  upon  her  labor  of 
love  she  had  implored  her  Heavenly  Father's 
blessing.  And,  then,  to  show  that  her  prayers 
were  sincere  and  sanguine,  she  grudged  no 
labor,  and  she  betrayed  no  gloom.  Her  assidu- 
ous preparation,  and  her  cheerful,  encouraging 
address,  were  the  natural  sequel  to  fervent  and 
believing  petitions.  "In  testimony  of  desire 
and  assurance  to  be  heard,  she  had  said, 
Amen  ;"*  but  she  not  only  said  it  in  the  closet, 
she  lived  it,  throughout  the  day.  Her  diligent 
study  of  the  subject  was  a  prolonged  Amen  in 
the  ear  of  God,  and  showed  how  desirous  was 

*  "Shorter  Catechism,"  Q.  107. 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLdUHOUN.  209 

her  prayer;  her  radiant  and  expectant  look 
was  to  her  Uttle  congregation  a  visible  Amen, 
and  told  them  how  assmed  she  was  that  God 
had  heard  her,  and  how  hopeful  she  was  that 
God  had  mercy  in  reserve  for  them.  And  we 
know  no  other  path  to  eminent  usefulness, 
except  like  perseverance  in  affectionate  mdus- 
try  and  hopeful  prayer.  Perhaps,  dear  reader, 
you  are  disappointed  by  some  previous  failure. 
Once  on  a  time  you  gathered  a  few  poor  peo- 
ple, or  an  up-grown  class  into  a  cottage  or  the 
servants'  hall ;  but  it  was  with  difficulty  you 
filled  up  the  hour,  and  next  evening,  instead 
of  a  doubled  attendance,  only  nine  of  the  dozen 
returned  ;  and  instead  of  multiplying  to  fifty  or 
sixty,  as  m  the  present  case,  in  six  weeks  the 
last  straggler  had  stolen  away.  Nor  can  you 
blame  yourself;  for  your  motive  was  good,  and 
you  prayed  for  a  blessing.  True ;  but  allow 
us  respectfully  to  ask,  What  was  your  style  of 
address  ?  Was  it  kind  and  endearing?  or  was 
it  not  rather  magisterial,  preceptive,  reprimand- 
ing? The  eloquence  which  at  once  wins  and 
commands  unlettered  hearers,  is  like  His  Avhom 
"  the  common  people  heard  so  gladly." — it  is 
the  sympathetic  effusion  of  a  superior  nature : 
18* 


210  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

the  Utterance  of  a  mind  so  elevated  that  it 
need  take  no  thought  for  its  own  dignity,  but 
withal  so  cordial  and  compassionate,  that  it 
creates  or  catches  emotion  in  every  counte- 
nance it  looks  upon. 

•  The  Cottage  Readings  of  Lady  Colquhoun 
possessed  this  double  charm  :  her  hearers  could 
never  forget  the  Christian  lady,  and  she  never 
forgot  her  fellow-sinners  and  fellow-candidates 
for  an  immortal  crown  ;  so  that  a  sweet  benig- 
nity pervaded  her  exhortations  and  remon- 
strances, and  her  gentleness  was  full  of  "  au- 
thority." And  did  you  make  your  hearers  feel 
not  only  that  you  wished  them  well,  but  tliat 
you  were  full  of  hope  regarding  them  ?  Lady 
Colquhoun  knew  that  the  Gospel  is  "  the  power 
of  God  unto  salvation,"  and  she  announced  it 
with  a  joyful  confidence  ;  and  although  the  list- 
lessness  of  her  servants  or  scholars  might  send 
an  occasional  pang  through  her  spirit,  it  never 
tinged  her  words  with  resentment ;  but,  in  the 
exercise  of  that  love  which  ''hopeth  all  things," 
she  persisted,  till  love  and  hope  together  created 
their  own  reward.  And  before  your  experiiuent 
was  abandoned,  did  you  take  sufficient  pains 
to  warrant  its  success  ?     It  is  not  enough  to 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  211 

gather  an  expectant  group,  and  assume  that 
you  shall  be  able  to  address  them.  No  multi- 
tude of  guests  will  conjure  a  banquet  from  an 
empty  board  ;  nor  will  the  largest  congregation 
elicit  an  interesting  discourse  from  an  unfur- 
nished mind.  But  many  imagine  that  a  pocket 
Bible  is  a  magician's  mirror,  and  needs  only  to 
be  opened  in  order  to  summon  up  forgotten 
facts,  appropriate  similitudes,  and  powerful  ar- 
guments ;  and  they  are  mortified  if  they  do  not 
find  in  every  text  a  talisman.  None  could  de- 
pend on  Divine  assistance  more  devoutly,  nor 
court  the  influences  of  the  Comforter  with  more 
ardent  aspirations,  than  did  the  subject  of  this 
memorial ;  but  she  sought  them  in  her  study 
as  well  as  in  her  school-room ;  and  then,  when, 
her  mind  was  matured  as  to  the  meaning  of 
the  passage,  and  replenished  with  materials  for 
expounding  and  enforcing  it,  she  was  able  to 
look  up  for  the  promised  help  with  calm  and 
undistracted  confidence.  So  deeply  interested 
was  she  in  this  employment,  and  so  persuaded 
that  God  would  bless  it,  that  her  leisure  was 
delightfully  occupied  in  searching  the  Scrip- 
tures, and  in  preparatory  meditations ;  and  till 
her  health  gave  way  she  was  never  daunted  by 


212  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

the  frequent  sensation  of  fatigue.  May  we  not 
hope  that  her  modest  labors  will  afford  some 
encouragement  or  guidance  to  that  growing 
number  among  the  refined  and  the  leisurely 
who  "  have  compassion  on  the  multitude  ?" 

She  now  paid  frequent  visits  to  her  son-in- 
law  and  daughter  in  Suffolk.  She  delighted  in 
the  primitive  nooks,  the  bosky  dells,  the  winding 
lanes,  and  little  corn-clad  hills  which  make  up 
one  of  the  most  picturesque  and  sequestered  of 
Old  England's  counties  ;  and  many  a  musing 
walk  she  took,  when  the  tide  was  full,  along 
the  grass-girdled  creek  which  stretches  away 
from  the  grounds  of  Stutton  to  the  ancient 
seaport  of  Harwich.  But  beyond  the  beautiful 
landscape,  she  found  materials  of  much  interest 
in  the  homely  villagers.  At  first,  when  she 
stepped  into  their  cottages,  as  she  had  been  ac- 
customed to  do  at  Luss,  and  in  her  district  of 
St.  Luke's,  in  Edinburgh,  they  could  scarcely 
comprehend  her  errand.  But  when  from  her 
conversation  and  the  tracts  which  she  gave 
them,  they  found  that  her  motive  was  pure 
benevolence,  their  gratitude  was  as  great  as 
their  surprise.  She  found  amongst  them  not  a 
few  members  of  the  Wesleyan  Society,    and 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  213 

they  begged  that  she  would  return  to  their 
houses  ia  the  evenings,  and  explain  the  Scrip- 
tures when  the  work  of  the  day  was  ended. 
With  such  requests  she  gladly  complied  ;  but 
so  many  of  the  neighbors  came  together,  that 
she  was  obliged  to  place  restrictions  on  their 
zeal,  and  hmit  the  attendance  to  a  certain 
number.  The  impressive  way  in  which  she 
read  the  Word  of  God,  and  her  enforcement  of 
its  truths  so  clear  and  earnest,  are  still  vividly 
remembered  among  them  ;  and  there  is  reason 
to  believe  that  some  got  real  benefit.  To  these 
engagements  there  are  a  few  incidental  al- 
lusions in  her  Diary.     Thus  : — 

"  Stilt  ton  House,  Jime  21,  1840.— I  feel  that 
I  have  been  sent  here  with  a  message  to  many. 
The  people  gladly  receive  my  books  and  tracts, 
and  I  have  seen  some  Christians  amon^  the 
Methodists. 

^' Jail/  12. — On  Thursday  I  met  with  a 
number  of  the  villagers  in  a  cottage.  I  read 
the  second  chapter  of  Ephesians,  with  expla- 
nation, and  prayed  with  them.  And  now  we 
are  to  separate,  perhaps  never  to  meet  in  this 


214  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ,UHOUN. 

world :  Oh  !  to  meet  oil  the  right  hand  of  the 
Judge ! 

"  Aug.  27. — Yesterday  was  greatly  interested 
hi  speaking  to  one  of  the  villagers,  who  said 
that  she  had  backslidden  from  God.  May  I 
have  been  sent  to  her  with  a  blessing  !" 

Among  the  Church  of  England  clergymen 
with  whom  she  became  acquainted  in  Suffolk, 
she  was  much  pleased  with  the  active  benevo- 
lence of  the  Rev.  J.  B.  Wilkinson,  of  Holbrook, 
and  the  missionary  zeal  of  the  late  Mr.  Not- 
tidge,  of  Ipswich  ;  and,  witli  all  her  preference 
for  the  simple  worship  of  the  Scottish  Church, 
nothing  more  delighted  her  than  to  find  affec- 
tionate preaching  and  devotional  fervor  else- 
where. 

"  Oct.  1. — We  went  to  church   at    Ipswich 

to-day,  to  hear  Mr.  R ,  a  young  minister, 

who  is  doing  much  good  there.  I  was  much 
pleased  and  cheered  to  hear  the  truth  plainly, 
ably,  and  judiciously  preached  ;  and  he  read 
the  service  beautifully.  My  heart  unites  with 
all  in  every  denomination  in  whom  I  see  the 
Spirit's  impress.     This  is  truly  a  magnet  to 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN.  215 

me.  Spent  some  hours  in  my  room  agreeably 
afterwards,  and  read,  as  usual,  to  the  ser- 
vants/^ 

From  the  same  place  she  thus  wrote  to  a 
very  dear  mvalid  friend  : — 

"  1839. — I  have  gone  into  a  few  of  the  cot- 
tages with  my  little  messengers  of  peace — the 
tracts,  and  they  give  me  a  hearty  welcome  ; 
but  I  scarcely  know  what  to  say  to  them,  they 
seem  to  have  so  few  ideas  in  common. 
It  appears  to  me  that  they  comprehend  little, 
while  they  assent  to  everything.  However, 
they  take  the  tracts  with  thanks,  and  some- 
times the  cheering  thought  occurs  that  I 
have  not  come  so  far  for  nothing.    Who  knows 

what  God  may  bless  ? But,  my  dear 

young  friend,  as  well  in  our  winters  as  our 
summers  the  foundation  standeth  sure  ;  '  Christ 
is  All.'  With  Him  is  no  variableness,  neither 
shadow  of  turning.  Precious  truth  !  Let  us 
rest  upon  it,  and  cease  from  the  vain  endeavor 
to  find  anything  in  us  that  can  give  the 
shadow  of  hope.  Abiding  hope  must  be  fixed 
on  an  object  that  changeth   not :  we  change 


216  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

daily,  hourly :  He  remains  glorious  in  holiness 
eternally.  And  this  Perfection  is  in  the  Court 
of  Heaven  our  representative.  Can  we  want 
more?  Shall  we  say,  I  will  add  a  few  of  my 
virtues  and  graces  to  the  account?  AVhen  we 
are  guilty  of  this  folly,  we  weary  ourselves 
seeking  for  them,  for  they  cannot  be  found, 
and  our  harp  hangs  upon  the  willows.  But 
we  resume  the  songs  of  Zion  when  we  look 
entirely  from  ourselves  to  '  the  Lord  our  Right- 
eousness.' How  is  it  with  you,  dear  A.  ?  Can 
you  rejoice  in  the  Lord  always  ?  If  not,  ex- 
perience will  teach  you  that  living  on  frames 
and  feelings  will  not  do  ;  that  comfort  ebbs 
and  flows  with  these ;  and  that  you  equally 
delude  yourself  when  you  take  comfort  from 
the  feeling  of  nearness  to  God,  or  when  you 
lose  it  because  you  lack  that  joy  in  devotional 
exercises,  which  is  nevertheless  extremely  de- 
sirable and  much  to  be  prized.  This,  how- 
ever, is  distinct  from  joy  in  Christ  crucified, 
and  in  Christ  our  Righteousness ;  and  it  is 
very  possible  to  feel  little  heart  for  prayer  and 
to  mourn  an  absent  God,  and  yet  to  stand  firm 
on  the  sure  Foundation,  rejoicing  in  Christ,  and 
never  doubting  that  we  are  complete  in  Him." 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN.  217 

"  tStutton  House^  Jane  10,  1840. — My  dear- 
est A,,  I  received  your  letter  with  mixed  feel- 
ings of  pleasure  and  pain.  I  was  glad  to  hear 
from  yourself,  and  thankful  to  find  that  the 
Lord  is  still  at  your  right  hand ;  but  I  was 
disappointed  at  the  account  you  give  of  your 
health.  Dearest  A.,  I  do  fear  your  wish  will 
be  granted,  and  that  God  intends  to  take  you 
shortly  to  Himself  But  when  God  wills  it  so, 
and  you  are  willing,  shall  I  say  Nay  ?  I  trust 
not.  '  His  infinite  wisdom  can  never  mistake.' 
As  thou  wilt^  I  desire  to  say,  both  regarding 
myself  and  all  who  are  dear  to  me.  Difficult 
the  duty  is,  but  God  can  impart  the  ability  to 
perform  it.  I  rejoice  in  the  grace  given  to 
you,  dear  young  friend ;  and  I  must  repeat, 
Oh  !  to  be  partaker  of  it !  I  know  God  will 
never  leave,  never  forsake  you.  Through 
life,  through  death,  through  eternity,  that 
same  God  will  be  your  All  who  now  cheers 
you  in  the  trying  hours  of  sickness. 

"  Much,  very  much  mercy  follows  me.  I 
only  lack  greater  nearness  to  God,  a  sense  of 
his  presence  and  love,  and  greater  joy  in  Him 
as  my  chief  Good  and  only  Portion.  If  He  is 
pleased  to  deny  me  these  inestimable  privi- 
19 


218  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

leges,  I  have  no  right  to  expect  them ;  and 
even  then  I  cleave  to  the  covenant,  and  to  Him 
who  '  of  God  is  made  to  me  Righteousness.' 
You  see  I  have  not  forgotten  Mr.  Smeaton's 
text.  It  often  comes  to  my  remembrance  with 
power  still.  No  other  righteousness  have  I ; 
no  better  can  I  want,  nor  do  I  desire." 

^'  Jane  30. — I  am  still  at  Stutton,  but  expect 
soon  to  move  to  London, — not  exactly  the 
place  I  should  have  chosen  ;  but  all  is  well. 
God,  my  God,  can  be  with  me  there,  or  any- 
w^iere,  as  He  has  been  here.  He  has  been 
present  lately  without  any  outward  means 
save  books,  and  I  have  enjoyed  many  a  stroll 
by  the  river-side  with  my  Bible,  more  than  I 
have  often  enjoyed  in  the  house  of  God  with 
the  greatest  spiritual  advantages.  I  feel,  too, 
that  I  am  sent  to  others,  and  think  I  see  some 
fruit;  and  ivhen,  where,  how  Thou  wilt,  is 
what  I  desire  to  say  regarding  any  change  of 
residence." 

The  years  1839  and  1840  are  years  much 
to  be  remembered  in  Scotland's  spiritual  his- 
tory. God  was  not  then  "a  stranger  in  the 
land ;"  and  at  Kilsyth,  in  Dundee  and  Perth, 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLGIUHOUN.  219 

in  Roxburghshire,  and  in  Breadalbane,  such 
immediate  and  unwonted  effects  accompanied 
the  preaching  of  the  Gospel,  that  nothing 
seemed  impossible  to  faith  and  prayer.  Nor 
were  they  only  ministers  who  preached  with 
assurance  of  success  ;  elders  of  the  church  and 
private  Christians  were  roused  to  fresh  exer- 
tions on  behalf  of  their  neighbors.  In  con- 
junction with  some  others,  Lady  Colquhoun 
spent  a  considerable  portion  of  her  time  in 
visiting  a  neglected  district  of  the  New  Town 
of  Edinburgh  ;  and  from  the  transparent  sanc- 
tity of  her  character,  and  the  commanding 
sweetness  of  her  manner,  few  visitors  were 
more  welcome  or  more  impressive.  The  re- 
sumption of  these  labors  is  thus  recorded  in 
her  Diary  : —  - 

"  4,  Moray-place,  Nov.  24. — I  have  on  hand 
much  new  duty,  having  undertaken  to  visit, 
as  before,  the  poor  in  Thistle-street,  and  also 
to  visit  weekly,  in  turn  with  some  others,  the 
school  there.  And  I  have  joined  a  prayer- 
meeting  of  ladies,  who  meet  every  Thursday. 
Lord  grant  thy  blessing  and  assistance  !  With- 
out Thee  I  can  do  nothing.     Strengthen  for 


220  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

thine  own  work  a  poor  helpless  creature.  Last 
week  I  was  much  encouraged  by  hearmg  that 
one  I  had  visited,  and  whom  I  found  in  a  very- 
careless  state,  had  died  hopefully." 

In  letters  to  her  like-minded  correspondent, 
she  occasionally  notices  the  more  interesting 
cases ;  and  although  it  would  be  premature  to 
publish  what  she  says  regarding  hopeful  indi- 
viduals till  they  have  given  that  most  decisive 
evidence,  "  perseverance  to  the  end,"  the  reader 
may  obtain  a  glimpse  of  the  home  missionary 
in  the  following  extracts  : — 

"1  have  seen  .  It  seems  the  old  High- 
land woman  next  door  is  her  sister,  and  by  her 
account  (for  she  has  so  httle  English  that  I 
cannot  judge  of  her),  the  sister  is  in  the  same 
state  of  anxiety  in  which  she  herself  was  for- 
merly,  praying   night  and  day  for  her  soul's 

salvation.     told  her,   '  Perhaps  ye'll  get 

peace  in  a  moment.'  The  old  woman  has  a 
son  and  a  daughter-in-law  who  have  come 
from  Glasgow  to  stay  v/itli  her.  They  were 
notorious  drunkards,  but  are  keeping  sober. 
's  great  anxiety  was  that  I  should  speak 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  221 

to  them  all.  'Oh,  will  you  speak  to  them? 
they  think  I'm  hy  myseV^*  So,  to  secure  the 
young  man's  being  in,  I  went  at  their  dinner- 
hour,  but  said  to ,  'I  fear  I  shall  interrupt 

their  dinner.'  '  Oh  !'  said  she,  '  if  they  were 
to  want  their  dinner  for  a  twelvemonth,  what 
does  that  matter?'  I  thought  they  all  seemed 
affected,  especially  in  prayer,  when  I  earnestly 
plead  for  sinners,  and  the  young  pair  promised 
to  go  and  hear  Mr.  M.  I  gave  the  old  woman 
some  GaeHc  tracts,  and  she  began  to  read  them 

instantly.     told  me  of  a  very  interesting 

case  opposite:  a  poor  woman  with  five  chil- 
dren, whose  husband  is  a  perfect  reprobate. 
She  is  interested  for  her  soul,  but  he  will  not 
let  her  attend  on  ordinances ;  and  the  last 
communion  he  scolded  her  so,  because  she  was 
dressed  to  go,  that  she  was  quite  unfitted  for 
the  Lord's  Table,  and  stayed  at  home." 

"  Friday. — I  made  out  a  visit  to  the  poor 
persecuted  woman  I  wrote  you  of,  and  she  was 
telling  me  some  of  her  grievances,  when  in 
came  her  husband,  a  forbidding-looking  hack- 
ney-coachman. He  started  back,  and  went  to 
another  room.  I  sent  her  for  him,  saying,  if  he 
*  Beside  myself 

19* 


222  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

liked  to  hear  it,  I  was  going  to  read  the  Bible. 
He  came  in.  and  I  chatted  a  little  first,  and  he 
related  a  long  story  how  ill  he  had  been  used 
by  a  man  whom  he  had  once  befriended.  I 
took  the  opportunity  and  said,  '  You  may  often 
meet  with  ingratitude  from  man,  because  we 
are  sinful  creatures  ;  but  go  to  God  and  trust 
Him,  and  He  will  never  forsake  you  ;'  and  then 
1  read  my  little  portion  as  usual  with  prayer  ; 
and  certain!}^  my  hardened  acquaintance  looked 
softened,  for  I  saw  him  wipe  his  eyes." 

Writing  to  the  same  friend,  August  27, 1838, 
she  says : — 

"  The  few  words,  '  God  is  love,'  have  been 
delightfully  on  my  mind  lately.  I  cannot  give 
you  the  impression  that  has  been,  given  me ; 
for  I  feel  that  it  is  by  the  Holy  Ghost  (the  reality 
of  whose  influences  I  am  more  and  more  con- 
vinced of),  and  that  in  speaking  to  others  or 
they  to  us,  of  what  this  blessed  Agent  teaches, 
we  have  no  power  to  bring  to  the  mind  of  another 
what  we  ourselves  experience.  I  should  like 
much  to  know  Mr.  M'Cheyne.  Your  account 
of  his  pretty  idea  regarding  the  wilderness  is  so 
like  him,  I  think  I  could  have  told  who  said  it." 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  223 

The  diary  of  Aug.  19  alludes  to  the  same 
text : — 

"For  some  days  'God  is  love'  has  been  de- 
lightfully impressed  upon  my  mind,  and  I  have 
been  enabled  very  much  to  give  up  the  crea- 
ture. I  saw  the  greatness  of  God's  love  to  7ne, 
and  from  his  being  love — the  essence  of  it — I 
conceived  how  he  could  love  multitudes,  even 
as  we  do  one  or  two.  We  have  not  love  enough 
to  give  to  many,  but  God's  love  is  to  all  his 
children  equally  strong  to  that  which  we  have 
to  a  very  few,  and  probably  much  greater. 
How  sweet !" 

Under  the  same  date  she  apprizes  her  friend 
of  a  new  volume  which  she  was  preparing, 
"The  World's  Religion  as  contrasted  with 
genuine  Christianity."  It  appeared  in  the 
following  winter,  and  in  1835  had  been  pre- 
ceded by  "The  Kingdom  of  God."  "Th6 
World's  Religion"*  was  Lady  Colquhoun's  last 
publication,  and  though  in  its  structure  and 
contents  wholly  distinct,  its  title  will  remind 
the  reader  of  that  book  which  she  had  reason 
to   prize   beyond   all   human   authorship,  the 

*  The  "  World's  Religion,"  forms  one  of  the  volumes  of 
Carter's  Christian  Cabinet  Library. 


224  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

"  Practical  Christianity."  This  fondness  for  a 
first  love  is  an  interesting  feature  of  advancing 
years  ;  and  though  the  shadows  are  reversed, 
it  is  pleasant  to  know  that  ''  the  light  of  even- 
ing tide"  is  often  richer  and  warmer, — yes.  and 
more  radiant  with  hope,  than  the  morning 
spread  upon  the  mountains.  In  broken  health 
and  in  life's  decline  she  penned  this  wisest  and 
happiest  of  all  her  works,  to  teach  her  youthful 
friends  where  to  look  for  happiness.  She  there 
mentions  an  incident  which  her  father  once 
told  her.  It  was  the  time  when  Lord  Melville 
was  so  high  in  office  as  to  be  the  envy,  or  the 
idol,  of  his  Scottish  countrymen.  He  had  asked 
Sir  John  Sinclair  to  spend  New  Year's  Day 
with  him  at  Wimbledon,  and  having  slept  in 
the  house  the  previous  night.  Sir  John  repaired 
in  the  morning  to  the  chamber  of  his  host,  to 
wish  him  a  happy  new  year.  "It  had  need 
be  happier  than  the  last,"  was  the  statesman's 
answer,  "  for  I  cannot  recollect  a  single  happy 
day  in  it."  And  though  the  pious  authoress 
does  not  obtrude  her  own  experience,  it  is  right 
that  it  should  now  be  known.  Under  the  date 
February  3,  1839,  we  find  her  recording  in  her 
diary : — 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  225 

"  This  day  three  years  ago,  my  dear  husband 
departed  from  me.  These  years  have  been 
years  of  mercy.  No  misfortune  has  befallen 
me  ;  I  have  wanted  for  nothing,  and  grace,  I 
trust,  has  grown."  And  all  throughout  there 
predominates  a  cheerful  and  confiding  love,  as 
of  one  in  whose  future  there  could  be  no  real 
evil,  and  who  found  a  Friend  possessed  of  all- 
sufficiency. 

The  following  year  commences  : — 
^^  Edinburgh,  Jan.  5,  1840. — A  precious 
Sabbath,  with  something  of  the  Spirit's  in- 
fluence in  public  and  private.  Mr.  Moody 
preached  twice  from  '  Redeeming  the  time, 
because  the  days  are  evil.'  He  began  with  a 
striking  observation,  that  time  has  risen  in 
price,  as  every  commodity  does  when  it  grows 
scarcer.  He  had  heard  of  a  heathen  monarch 
to  whom  a  sorceress  brought  nine  volumes  of  a 
book,  demanding  a  high  price  for  them.  Think- 
ing it  too  much  he  refused,  and  she  burned  three, 
demanding  for  the  six  the  price  of  the  nine. 
He  still  declined  to  give  it,  and  she  burned 
three  more,  asking  the  full  sum  for  the  re- 
maining three.  He  began  to  think  there  must 
be  something  extraordinary  in  the  books,  and 


226  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

fearing  to  lose  them  all,  he  gave  for  the  three 
the  price  he  had  refused  for  nine.  So  time,  as 
it  dwindles,  grows  more  valuable." 

And  now  we  gladly  avail  ourselves  of  a  few 
extracts  from  letters  to  her  endeared  corres- 
pondent, Miss  S. : — 

"  13  Cumberland-street,  Hyde  Park, 
"  London,  Aug.,  1840. 
"  Many  thanks  for  your  prayers.  Perhaps 
you  prayed  for  me  last  Sabbath.  I  was  de- 
tained at  home  by  my  cold,  and  spent  most  of 
the  day  iu  my  own  room ;  yet  God  was  very 
present,  and  my  heart  was  with  Him.  It  was 
impressed  upon  me,  Some  one  prays  for  me, — 
perhaps  my  dear  A.  One  verse  I  met  with  in 
the  course  of  reading  was  sweetly  consolatory  ; 
I  think  it  is  Watts's  :— 

"'Jesus  !  I  throw  m  J  arms  around, 
And  hang  upon  thy  breast ; 
■    .    For  I  have  s  ought  no  other  home, 
And  found  no  other  rest.' 

This  rest,  dearest  A.,  abides.  You  are  about 
to  move  where  you  would  not  go  (to  Madeira), 
but   your   home — your   rest,   goes    with   you. 


LIFE    OP    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  227 

Strive  to  cast  away  all  anxiety,  just  as  if  you 
saw  the  Saviour's  arms  around  you.  I  need 
not  remind  you,  Be  careful  for  nothing,  but 
make  known  your  requests.  He  would  have 
you  without  carefulness.  Trust  him — try  Him  ; 
I  know  it  will  go  well  with  you.  I  had  a  letter 
lately  from  my  dear  friend  in  Canada,  Mrs. 
Scott.  She  relates  what  is  to  me  very  inter- 
esting: that  she  had  read  an  account  of  Kilsyth 
which  I  gave  her  to  a  man  from  Glasgow  who 
was  working  there,  but  who,  with  his  wife,  had 
become  much  addicted  to  drinking.  He  was 
so  much  struck  as  to  change  his  conduct  ever 
since,  and  she  has  hopes  of  the  conversion  of 
both.  I  have  just  read  in  the  newspapers  that 
there  has  been  a  tremendous  hurricane  at 
Liverpool,  and  not  over  on  Tuesday,  when  I 
meant  to  have  been  there.  Thus,  by  this  cold 
I  have  been  spared  the  inconvenience  of  re- 
maining there,  or  of  sailing  for  Scotland,  when 
neither  safe  nor  pleasant.  '  Trust  in  the  Lord 
forever.' " 

TO    THJE    SAME. 

"  Rossdhu,  Oct.  6,  1840. 
"Whether  hfe  or  death  be  in  your  cup,  I 


228  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

cannot  tell.  My  impression  certainly  is,  that 
he  has  thus  early  ripened  you  for  glory  with 
the  view  of  taking  you  to  himself.  And  is  it 
not  a  blessed  thing  that  I  can  tell  you  this 
without  the  fear  of  agitating  or  distressing 
you  ? — that  while  to  you  '  to  live  is  Christ,  to 
die  is  gain  ?'  But,  it  may  be  years  of  useful- 
ness await  you  ;  and  I,  who  am  old  in  years, 
and  who,  having  long  known  the  preciousness 
of  salvation  by  grace,  ought  to  be  also  ready, 
may  be  taken  first,  and  may  welcome  you  as? 
you  '  enter  in  through  the  gates  into  the  city.' 
I  often  think  of  this  passage.  Two  gate? 
seem  evident:  Christ  the  door,  and  the  gate  ol 
death.  There  is  no  admission  but  through 
these  gates,  and,  when  these  are  passed,  no 
impediment.  Oh,  the  joy  of  the  entrance 
when  the  gates  are  passed,  and  the  poor 
doubtful  believer  finds  himself  safe  in  the 
city!" 

-      TO    THE    SAME. 

''Rossdhu,  Nov.  11,  1840. 
"  You  ask  me  for  texts.     The  eleventh  chap- 
ter of  John,  with  all    the  particulars,   as   ex- 
plained   in   Henry's   Commentary,    has    been 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQUHOUN.  229 

much  blessed  to  me  lately, — particularly  what 
is  said  of  our  Lord's  love,  'He  whom  thou 
lovest  is  sick.'  No  doubt  upon  the  subject ; 
Christ's  love  must  have  been  evident  to  all. 
'Now  Jesus  loved  Martha,  and  her  sister,  and 
Lazarus.'  It  is  simply  told;  yet  carries  the 
conviction  that  the  apostle  saw  this  love.  I 
have  been  apt  to  think  too  much  of  Jesua' 
love  as  pity  and  benevolence  ;  its  reality  never 
struck  me  so  much  as  lately  in  reading  this 
passage.  And  if  we  had  an  apostle  to  tell  our 
story,  he  might  suy  with  equal  truth,  '  Now 
Jesus  loved  A.  and  her  friend,  and  that  other, 
and  each  of  his  redeemed  ones  on  earth.'  I 
know  this  truth  has  been  brought  home  to  my 
mind  by  the  Holy  Ghost;  and,  dear  young 
friend,  I  cannot  convey  my  meaning  to  you  un- 
less He  is  pleased  to  reveal  it.  Perhaps  you 
knew  it  long  ago." 

TO    THE    SAME. 

"  Bossdhu,  Sept.  8,  1841. 
"  The  proposed  union  for  prayer  is  interest- 
ing, and  I  shall  try  and  not  forget  Madeira.     I 
feel,  also,  some  anxiety  for  our  dear  Scotch 
Church.     We  used  to  agree  not  to  talk  of  it ; 
20 


230  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

but  it  now  appears  as  if  its  downfall  were 
approaching.  Tiie  Moderate  party  push  on 
the  decision  as  to  which  side  shall  constitute 
the  Estabhshment ;  and  if  they  are  to  consti- 
tute our  Church,  woe  to  many  a  destitute 
district  which  can  have  access  to  no  other 
preachers.  Yet  God  reigns,  and  is  '  Head  of 
the  body— the  Church.'  There  will  still  be 
Christ's  Church,  and  possibly  there  may  be  a 
great  reviving  among  us.     Amen. 

"I  heard  lately  from  my  dear  friend  in 
Canada,  Mrs.  Scott,  and  she  asks  with  much 
interest  about  you.  She  is  a  '  sister,'  and  you 
will  meet  in  glory.  How  many  will  be  there 
whom  we  shall  love  as  much  as  those  who  are 
dearest  to  us  now  !  Love  is  the  fulfilling  of 
the  law,  and  there  will  be  no  scarcity  of  love  in 
heaven, — '  beloved,  and  loving  all  t'  embrace.' 
Often  do  I  think,  could  I  perfectly  love  God  I 
should  be  quite  happy :  but  here  again,  I  see 
no  hope  till  taken  to  a  better  world.  I  can  no 
more  excite  this  love  than  I  can  fly.  I  can 
only  say.  Lord,  let  me  love  Thee ;  permit  me 
to  love  Thee ;  enable  me  to  love  Thee.  And 
if  there  be  the  faintest  commencement  of  this 
love,  it  is  himself  hath  done  it.     '  You  hath  he 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  231 

quickened  who  were  dead ;'  he  will  perfect 
what  concerns  us,  and  will  not  forsake  the 
work  of  his  own  hands.  This  is  my  hope — 
my  only  hope,  but  it  is  a  noble  hope;  '  Go(Vs 
workmanship,  created  in  Christ  Jesus  unto 
good  works,  which  God  hath  before  ordained^ 
that  we  should  walk  in  them.'  " 

TO    THE    SAME. 

"  20,  Charlotte-square,  March  9,  1842. 
"Mr.  Burns'  preaching-  has  much  power 
accompanying  it;  he  is  truly  in  earnest,  and 
I  hear  his  ministrations  are  blessed.  Mr. 
M'Cheyne  administered  the  Sacrament  beauti- 
fully, and,  oh,  how  he  prayed  for  our  dear 
pastor  !*  It  must  have  reached  many  hearts. 
He  also  read  to  us  one  evening  Mr.  Moody 
Stuart's  second  Pastoral  Letter,  and  inter- 
spersed it  with  remarks  of  his  own,  very  sweet 
and  apposite.  It  seemed  like  the  two  friends 
speaking  to  us  together.  I  never  saw  Mr. 
M'Cheyne  so  solemn  and  spiritual.  One  great 
loss  in  Mr.  Burns  is,  that  he  takes  no  superin- 
tendence of  the  parish  ;  he  is  always  preaching 
elsewhere.     But  the  elders  are  exerting  them- 

*  Then  in  impaired  health,  ajid  also  residing  at  Madeira. 


232  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

selves,  and  seem  to  feel  their  responsibility. — 
And  now,  how  joyful  to  know  that  all  these 
things  are  under  God's  control,  and  not  beneath 
his  notice !  A  verse  in  Psalin  civ.  has  often 
been  food  for  me.  Here  it  is,  dear  A.,  you 
shall  partake  of  my  bread  : — 

" '  Of  Hini  my  meditation  shall 
Sweet  thoughts  to  me  atford  ; 
And  as  for  me,  I  will  rejoice 
In  God  my  only  Lord.'  " 

It  was  in  this  year  that  a  new  system  of 
Sabbath-desecration  was  introduced  in  Scot- 
land, and,  with  deep  sorrow  Lady  Colquhoun 
in  her  diary  records  : — 

•'  March  13.— The  day  when  the  Sabbath 
trains  begin  to  run  on  the  Edinburgh  and 
Glasgow  Railway." 

On  this  point  so  strongly  did  she  feel,  that 
the  next  time  she  had  occasion  to  travel  be- 
twixt the  two  cities,  she  hired  post-horses, 
rather  than  employ  a  conveyance  which  syste- 
matically violated  the  Divine  command.  She 
was  then  in  feeble  health,  and  the  journey  con- 
sumed two  days  instead  of  as  many  hours  ; 
but  in  carrying  out  a  strong  conviction  of  duty, 
few  thought  so  lightly  of  personal  convenience 
or  comfort  as  Lady  Colquhoun. 


CHAPTER  VI 


FAVOR  IS  DECEITFUL,  AND  BEAUTY  IS  VAIN;  BUT  A  "WOMAN 
THAT  FEAKETH  THE  LORD,  SHE  SHALL  BE  PRAISED. — PROVERBS 
XXXI.  30. 


Christ  leads  me  through  no  darker  rooms 

Than  He  went  through  before  : 
He  that  into  God's  kingdom  comes 

Must  enter  by  this  door. 

Come,  Lord,  when  grace  hath  made  me  meet 

Thy  blessed  face  to  see ; 
For  if  thy  work  on  earth  be  sweet, 

What  will  thy  glory  be  ? 

My  knowledge  of  that  life  is  small, 

The  eye  of  faith  is  dim ; 
But  'tis  enough  that  Christ  knows  all ; 

And  I  shall  be  with  Him, 

RICHARD   BAXTER. 


The  year  1843  saw  the  Cluiuch  of  Scotland 
split  ill  sunder.  From  no  dislike  to  State-con- 
nection, but  in  avoidance  of  secular  control, 
two-fifths  of  the  clergy  and  half  the  population 
withdrew  from  the  old  Establishment.  Hot 
controversy  and  strong  excitement  preceded 
this  event,  as  every  one  would  expect,  who 
20* 


234  LIFE    OF    LADY    GOLaUHO  UN. 

knows  the  national  temperament,  and  who, 
when  her  rehgion  is  concerned,  remembers 
how  polemical  the  history  of  Scotland  has  ever 
been.  But  just  as  a  glowing  summer  will  oc- 
casionally eHcit  some  lovely  plant,  of  which 
the  soil  has  long  contained  the  dormant  gem, 
or  as  a  volcanic  outburst  will  condense  into 
crystalline  beauty  the  elements  which  have 
been  hitherto  crudely  diffused  through  the 
strata, — so,  those  who  are  careful  to  collect  the 
finest  specimens  of  human  excellence  must 
look  for  them  in  periods  when  the  public  mind 
has  been  stimulated,  or  when  the  apathy  of 
ages  has  been  startled  by  some  powerful  revo- 
lution. Apart  altogether  from  the  rightness 
of  their  cause,  it  will  be  conceded  that  more 
munificence,  self-sacrifice,  and  missionary  en- 
thusiasm were  developed  by  the  day  of  the  Dis- 
ruption than  by  a  century  of  tame  church- 
going  and  tranquil  sermonizing ;  nor,  until 
they  learned  it  in  the  furnace  of  affliction,  did 
ministers  and  people  know  how  dear  they  were 
to  one  another,  nor  how  intense  was  that  rela- 
tion which  bound  them  to  their  common  Lord 
and  Lawgiver. 

It   so   happened   that   in   their  capacity  as 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQUHOUN.  235 

members  of  the  Indian  Female  Education  So- 
ciety, Lady  Colquhoim  and  her  friends  were 
constrained  to  a  miniature  rehearsal  of  the 
Disruption,  some  time  before  the  greater  event 
transpired  ;  and  this  first  step,  hke  the  final  one, 
she  took  with  her  accustomed  conscientious- 
ness, irrespective  of  fashion,  and — which  alone 
was  painful — in  some  instances,  irrespective  of 
personal  friendship.  But  her  calm  and  inde- 
pendent mind  had  fully  considered  the  ques- 
tion ;  and,  dear  as  the  Scotch  Establishment 
had  ever  been  to  her,  it  was  only  dear  so  long 
as  in  sacred  things  it  owned  itself  amenable  to 
none  except  its  heavenly  Head.  In  following 
the  cause  of  spiritual  freedom,  she  believed 
that  she  was  only  following  the  Guiding  Pil- 
lar ;  and  though  well  aware  that  the  ministers 
and  elders  whom  she  chiefly  esteemed  would 
follow  it  also,  it  was  a  joyful  surprise  to  find 
such  a  multitude  of  the  people  prepared  for  the 
movement.  By  giving  impulse  and  outlet  to 
the  piety  of  her  remaining  years,  the  Disrup- 
tion is  entitled  to  form  a  date  in  her  biography^ 
as  well  as  in  many  a  private  history.* 

*  The  history  of  the  whole  event  lias  just  been  published 
by  Dr.  Robert  Buchanan,  in  his  interesting  narrative,  "  The 


236  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

The  first  notice  of  this  memorable  day  oc- 
curs in  her  journal : — 

"  Rossdhu,  Maij  28, 1843.— I  have  been  here 
upwards  of  a  week  ;  but  neither  this  Sabbath 
nor  the  last  have  I  enjoyed  public  ordinances. 
As  was  expected,  the  Disruption  of  our  Church 
took  place  [May  18]  when  between  four  and 
five  hundred  of  our  devoted  pastors  gave  up 
all  for  Christ,  and  rather  than  belong  to  an 
Erastian  Church,  left  their  homes  and  benefi- 
ces. May  a  blessing,  a  great  blessing,  rest  on 
themselves  and  their  labors  in  'The  Free 
Presbyterian  Church  of  Scotland,'  to  which 
with  them  I  now  belong  !  Nothing  is  yet  or- 
ganized as  to  a  stated  ministry,  and  I  did  not 
think  it  right  to  attend  in  the  old  Establish- 
ment. Both  last  Sunday  and  to-day  I  have 
been  enabled  to  read  to  my  servants,  and 
though  feeling  the  deprivation,  have  spent  the 
day  tolerably. 

^^  June  11. — Mr.  Somerville  came  to  Luss, 

Ten  Years'  Conflict."  The  case  has  also  been  stated  with 
singular  perspicuity  and  force  by  members  of  other  Churches ; 
e.  g.,  by  the  Hon.  and  Rev.  B.  W^  I^oel ;  by  Mr.  Sydow,  the 
King  of  Prussia's  Chaplain ;  and  by  Dr.  Merle  D'Aubigno,  in 
his  "  Germany,  England,  and  Scotland." 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  237 

and  delightfully  and  very  freely  preached 
Christ,  on  Monday,  at  Arnbiirn,  and  on  Tues- 
day in  the  village,  in  the  open  air,  close  to  the 
church.  Both  times  there  was  a  good  attend- 
ance, and  many  of  the  people  seemed  aflfected 
and  struck.  I  myself  felt  much  strengthened 
and  invigorated." 

For  many  years  Lady  Colquhoun  had  been 
praying  for  the  parish  of  Luss,  and  her  Jour- 
nals show  how  confident  she  was  that  God 
would  arise  and  have  mercy  upon  that  neigh- 
borhood. In  her  own  modest  but  useful  labors, 
her  prayer  was  partly  answered  ;  and  in  the 
plantation  of  the  Free  Church,  she  was  spared 
to  see  it  answered  yet  more  fully.  A  congre- 
gation was  organized  ;  the  Rev.  Neil  Stewart 
was  ordained  its  minister  ;  and  on  sites  granted 
by  her  son,  there  now  '  stand  most  beautiful' 
the  manse  of  the  minister  and  the  church  of 
the  people.  To  some  of  these  occurrences  she 
thus  alludes  : — 

"  Stutton,  Sept.  10, 1843.— Have  lately  found 
prayer  answered  in  several  particulars,  which 
might  be  termed  trilling,  yet  which   cost  me 


238  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLdUHOUN. 

anxiety.  Read  this  morning  what  I  wrote  here 
on  prayer  for  Luss  and  itr,  neighborhood,  Oct. 
11,  1840 ;  and  may  I  not  hope  that  these 
prayers  are  now  answering  ? 

"  Rossdhu,  Nov.  19. — Had  the  great  joy  to 
hear  Christ  fully  and  freely  preached  by  our 
new  young  minister,  at  the  Arnburn,  where 
the  Free  Church  congregation  meet.  How 
many  times  have  I  prayed  for  a  Uving,  hfe- 
giving  ministry  at  Luss  !  What  a  difference  it 
makes  to  me  in  living  here  ! 

"  June  30, 1844. — Again  at  the  Arnburn,  and 
heard  Mr.  Stewart  with  great  pleasure.  There 
seemed  an  impression  among  the  people.  Oh, 
that  God  may  appear  in  his  glory  among  us  ! 
for  this  I  long  and  pray.  It  is  expected  that 
the  new  church  at  Bandry  will  be  opened  next 
Lord's- day.  These  are  great  privileges.  Lord, 
give  the  blessing !  What  can  men  do,  even 
thine  own  dear  children  ?  They  are  altogether 
powerless. 

"  Jul?/  14. — Last  Lord's-day  our  Free  church 
was  opened.  I  was  nearly  the  whole  day 
there.  The  services  were  impressive,  and  a 
great  many  from  neighboring  parishes  attended. 
Lord,  bless  this  place,  now  set  apart  for  thy 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQUHOUN.  239 

worship !    May  many  sons  and  daughters  be 
born  unto  Thee  there  !" 

One  day,  when  the  Free  church  was  a-build- 
ing,  she  went  m  to  see  how  the  work  was  pro- 
ceeding, and  observing  that  one  of  the  pews 
had  a  private  door,  and  was  also  much  larger 
and  more  elevated  than  the  rest,  she  asked  for 
whom  it  was  intended.  The  carpenter  said, 
"  For  your  Ladyship  and  family."  She  imme- 
diately directed  that  the  private  door  should  be 
built  up,  and  the  pew  made  hke  its  neighbors ; 
"  for,"  as  she  remarked,  "  there  ought  to  be  no 
distinctions  in  the  house  of  God." 

However,  it  was  not  only  in  procuring  minis- 
ters for  the  parishes  along  the  shores  of  Loch- 
Lomond  that  the  Disruption  taxed  the  energy 
of  Lady  Colquhoun.  For  many  years  she  had 
been  the  patroness  and  an  influential  director 
of  various  benevolent  Societies  in  Edinburgh. 
One  was  an  Association,  already  mentioned, 
for  promoting  Female  Education  in  Lidia.  in 
connection  with  the  Scottish  Missions  there. 
Commenced  by  the  pious  and  talented  Mrs. 
Wilson,  of  Bombay,  the  system  soon  ramified 
into  all  the  eastern  Presidencies ;  and,  as  open- 


240  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

ing  the  simplest  and  surest  access  to  the  homes 
of  the  Hindoos,  it  promises  to  be  a  most  power- 
ful instrument  in  India's  moral  regeneration. 
Lady  Colquhoun  set  on  it  great  value,  and  be- 
sides keeping  in  her  own  hand  the  minutes  of 
the  Society,  with  eminent  wisdom  and  kind- 
ness, she  conducted  the  correspondence  with  its 
several  agents. 

Then  there  was  the  Ladies'  Society  in  Aid 
of  the  Home  Mission  of  the  Presbyterian 
Church  in  Ireland.  In  his  providence  God 
had  opened  to  that  Church  a  peculiar  oppor- 
tuntity  of  preaching  the  Gospel  to  the  Irish- 
speaking  inhabitants  of  the  west  and  south,  and 
at  a  time  when  few  felt  any  interest  in  the  sub- 
ject, Lady  Colquhoun  recognized  in  the  tidings 
which  she  heard  an  opening  towards  boundless 
usefulness.  She  succeeded  in  communicating 
to  half-a-dozen  friends  something  of  her  own 
ardor,  and  founded  an  Institution  which  suc- 
cessive years  have  only  rendered  more  imperi- 
ously urgent.  To  her  fellow-laborers  in  this 
cause  she  set  a  noble  example,  by  educating 
one  of  the  converts,  at  her  own  expense,  for 
the  Christian  ministry  ;  and  by  personal  com- 
munication with  members  of  the  Ulster  Assem- 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN.  241 

bly,  she  kept  alive  the  zeal  of  herself  and  her 
colleaguet^.  But  to  her  patriotic  and  practical 
spirit,  still  dearer,  perhaps,  was  the  Gaelic 
School  Society.  Like  her  venerable  father, 
whose  last  thoughts  were  for  the  moral  and 
religious  welfare  of  the  Highlands,  she  had  a 
warm  attachment  to  that  people  ;  and,  know- 
ing how  many  regions  had  been  spiritually 
enhghtened,  and  how  many  thousands  had 
been  scripturally  instructed  by  this  Society's 
godly  teachers,  she  gave  it  her  most  cordial 
and  liberal  support.  But  each  of  these  Soci- 
eties was  more  or  less  shaken  in  that  explosion 
which  rent  in  twain  the  Established  Church  ; 
and,  though  many  statistics  were  long  debated, 
two  points  were  soon  conceded  :  it  was  plain 
that  the  Free  Church  had  all  the  missionaries, 
and  equally  plain  that  the  Established  Church 
had  most  of  the  moneyed  men.  And  then  it 
w^as  that  on  the  adherents  of  the  new  and 
scripless  Institution  was  poured  out  that  spirit 
of  joyful  contribution  which,  besides  covering 
Scotland  with  a  new  system  of  schools  and 
sanctuaries,  augmented  its  mission-staff,  and 
invented  schemes  of  pious  enterprise  as  costly 
as  they  were  original.  Amongst  the  foremost 
21 


242  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLGiUHOUN, 

in  the  ranks  of  liberal  givers  and  instant  doers, 
was  Lady  Colquhoun.  Fully  persuaded  in 
her  own  mind,  and  alive  to  the  peerless  ex- 
igency, she  commenced  that  series  of  sump- 
tuous offerings  so  helpful  to  the  cause,  and  so 
inspiring  to  its  friends.  Apart  from  local  ob- 
jects which  mainly  devolved  upon  her,  if  a 
Highland  minister  wrote  for  help  to  his  people 
who  had  carted  the  stones  a.nd  the  timber,  but 
who  could  not  build  the  church  ;  if  a  Lowland 
minister  represented  the  case  of  some  clever 
and  pious  youth  who  would  fain  go  to  college, 
but  who  could  not  pay  the  fees  ;  if — as,  alas  ! 
such  tales  were  too  frequent  and  too  true — she 
heard  of  sufferings  for  conscience'  sake,  her 
wonderful  purse  was  always  open,  and  she  so 
contrived  to  give  that  her  gifts  never  hinted 
the  self-denial  of  the  sender.  To  herself 
money  had  now  become  a  talent,  and  its  right 
bestowment  a  means  of  grace ;  and,  radiant 
with  the  bountiful  spirit  of  this  new  dispensa- 
tion, there  was  contagion  in  her  cheerful  offer- 
ings, as  well  as  comfort  in  her  calm  and  saga- 
cious councils.  Inevitably  she  became  the  cen- 
tre of  those  Societies  of  which  she  had  been 
formerly   the   supporter ;    and,    on    the    other 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ,UHOUN.  243 

hand,  she  rejoiced  to  find  that  her  favorite 
schemes  for  India  and  Ireland  had  not  suffered 
from  the  uQwonted  claims  of  Scotland. 

Perhaps  a  manly  gratitude  is  as  rare  as  a 
princely  munificence  ;  but  to  the  aff'ecliooate 
memory  of  one  too  high-minded  to  forget  a 
favor,  and  too  devout  to  regard  Lady  Colquhoun 
as  his  only  benefactor,  her  biographer  is  in- 
debted for  an  instance  of  her  seasonable  and 
discriminating  kindness.  It  was  in  the  sum- 
mer of  the  Disruption,  and  when  looking  out 
for  a  Free  Church  minister  for  Luss,  that  the 
name  of  a  young  licentiate  was  mentioned  to 
her.  Though  apprized  that  through  excessive 
indulgence  in  study, — for  he  had  been  reading 
eighteen  hours  a  day, — his  health  was  broken, 
she  sent  for  him.  With  some  reluctance  he 
came ;  but  instead  of  the  sturdy  athlete  which 
a  country  minister  had  need  to  be,  there  stood 
before  a  spectral  invalid.  Two  eminent  physi- 
cians had  told  him  that  in  less  than  nine 
months  he  must  be  in  his  grave,  and  the  faith- 
ful warning  had  made  him  eager  to  work  while 
it  was  day.  From  some  cause  or  other,  how- 
ever, Lady  Colquhoun  was  prepossessed  with  a 
sanguine  hope  that  if  rightly  treated  he  would 


244  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

recover.  She  thought  and  prayed  over  his 
case,  and  sending  for  him  again,  propounded  a 
scheme  which  she  had  devised  for  his  benefit. 
She  stipulated  that  he  would  put  himself  en- 
tirely in  her  hands,  be  guided  by  her  advice, 
and  use  all  means  for  convalescence  at  her 
cost.  Of  course,  all  preaching  was  strictly  pro- 
hibited ;  the  shattered  student  was  ordered  off 
to  drink  a  famous  mineral  water  ;  and  after  a 
year  of  rest  and  rustication  he  was  ready  to 
accept  a  cordial  call  to  go  and  minister  in  a 
Highland  congregation,  amongst  whom  he  has 
.labored  ever  since,  a  vigorous  and  successful 
pastor.  Having  been  favored  with  a  perusal 
of  the  letters  which  Lady  Colquhoun  addressed 
to  her  young  friend,  if  the  following  extracts 
strike  the  reader  as  the  entire  correspondence 
struck  us,  they  will  convey  some  idea  of  that 
delicacy  and  good  sense,  that  piety  and  kind- 
ness which  were  so  beautifully  combined  in  her 
character. 

"  Sutherland's  Hotel,  July  1,  1843. 

"  Dear  Mr. :    On  thinking  over  Avhat  I 

said  to  you  yesterday,  I  fear  I  was  not  suffi- 
ciently explicit.     I  wish  you  to  promise  that 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  245 

after  the  two  Sabbaths  for  which  you  are 
engaged,  you  will  preach  no  more  for  some 
months,  and  save  yourself  in  every  way  as 
much  as  possible.  Nothing  short  of  this  will 
be  of  any  avail,  and  it  would  be  folly  to  deny 
yomself  the  satisfaction  of  doing  much  in  the 
long-run,  by  perhaps  one  sermon.  Therefore 
be  firm  in  this  respect,  and  be  silent  for  the  pres- 
ent. Depend  upon  it,  to  put  steadily  in  force 
this  resolution,  requires  more  grace  and  strength 
from  above  than  to  follow  your  own  inclination 
and  preach  the  word. 

'•  Do  not  be  very  long  in  writing  to  me,  as  I 
shall  be  anxious  to  hear  how  the  Almighty 
prospers  our  scheme,  and  trusting  it  may  be  his 
pleasure  to  grant  you  a  long  life  of  usefulness 
and  many  souls  for  your  hire, 

'•  I  remain,  your  sincere  friend,"  &c. 

"  Stiitton  House,  Ipswich,  Sept.  6,  1843. 
"  I  received  your  letter  this  morning  with 
real  thankfulness ;  for  I  much  feared  my  last 
had  not  reached  you.  I  inclose  — ,  whicli  I 
can  assure  you  I  give  without  any  difficulty  or 
deprivation  to  myself,  and  I  am  sure  I  may  say 
with  heartfelt  pleasure.  Could  I  be  instrumen- 
21* 


246  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

tal  ill  perfecting  your  recovery,  so  that  you 
may  live  to  the  glory  of  God  and  bring  souls  to 
the  Saviour,  how  rich  would  be  the  blessing  on 
this  poor  mammon  of  unrighteousness  !  For 
this  1  pray,  and  not  without  the  hope  that  my 
prayer  is  heard.  You  shall  not  sell  your  books 
if  I  can  keep  them  for  you.  God  has  brought 
your  case  under  my  notice  most  providentially. 
I  praise  his  name  for  it.  It  is  only  an  answer 
to  many  prayers  that  he  would  point  out  what 
he  would  have  me  to  do. 

"  I  am  beginning  to  look  to  loved  Scotland 
now,  and  think  I  shall  not  remain  many  weeks 
longer  in  England.  I  am  living  with  a  daugh- 
ter and  her  family,  in  a  pretty  county,  and 
where  the  air  is  delightfully  clear  and  salubri- 
ous. But  all  will  not  make  up  for  the  want  of 
those  precious  means  of  grace  with  which  our 
favored  land  is  blessed.  May  our  afflicted 
Church  have  a  double  portion  of  the  dew  of 
Hermon  descend  upon  her  in  her  present  af- 
flicted and  yet  exalted  state  !  She  goes  on 
prosperously,  and  '  with  Christ  in  the  vessel, 
may  smile  at  the  storm.' " 

«  ^tutton  House,  Sept.  25,  1843. 
"  Your  last  letter,  gloomy  although  it  is  in 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  247 

some  respects,  gave  me  the  sincerest  pleasure, 
as  it  tells  me  you  were  beginning  to  derive 
benefit  from  the  waters.  May  the  Almighty 
continue  to  you  their  healing  virtue,  sending 
you  health  and  cure  !  One  thing  I  would  with 
much  earnestness  entreaty  that  you  will  not 
think  of  leaving  the  place  till  medical  men 
say  there  is  no  use  in  your  remaining,  I  have 
a  great  fear  of  your  but  half-doing  matters, 
and  then  all  will  be  thrown  away.  One  timely 
and  persevering  effort  saves  much.  I  know 
there  will  be  somewhat  more  expense  in  your 
present  residence  ;  but  to  what  better  purpose 
can  money  be  expended  than  in  promoting  the 
glory  of  God  in  the  salvation  of  men  ?  And 
do  you  not  see  that  with  your  recovery  this,  by 
his  blessing,  may  be  intimately  connected? 
My  stock  is  not  exhausted.  God  has  given 
me  means  which  many  others  do  not  possess ; 
and  in  your  case  he  has  plainly  said  to  me, 
^Do  this.'  The  debt  is  not  to  you  ;  along  with 
all  I  am  and  all  I  have,  it  is  claimed  by  Him 
who  loved  me  and  gave  himself  for  me.  Take, 
therefore,  without  scruple,  what  our  Lord  ap- 
points as  yours,  and  give  him  the  praise. 

"  And  now,  as  to  the  state  of  your  mind.     I 


248  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

read  what  you  say  with  much  sympathy.  Oh ! 
that  Gocl  would  enable  me  to  send  you  a  word 
from  Himself!  And  first,  I  think  it  highly 
probable  that  the  disordered  state  of  the  body 
has  more  or  less  connection  with  it ;  and  of  this 
you  will  judge  as  the  body  recovers  strength 
and  tone.  But  from  what  you  have  written, 
as  well  as  from  what  you  said  when  we  met,  I 
should  think  there  is  something  like  impatience 
at  the  total  inactivity, — what  you  term  use- 
lessness,  to  which  you  are  reduced.  The  desire 
of  usefulness  is  good  in  itself;  but,  dear  Mr. 

,  remember  it  is  not  for  us  to  allot  the 

times  and  the  seasons  when  God  shall  employ 
our  services.  There  is  often  a  waiting  time  as 
w^ell  as  a  working  time,  and,  if  I  mistake  not, 
you  will  work  ^double  tides'  shortly.  Your 
present  duty  is  to  bear  his  will  in  silence, 
saying.  When, — where, — how  thou  wilt.  But 
'  the  face  of  God  seems  hid,  and  the  Saviour 
less  present  and  less  precious.'  Ah !  this  is 
indeed  a  bitter  cup,  and  God  alone  can  remove 
it.  1  have  often  thought  that  ministers  must 
taste  such  things ;  or  how  should  they  know 
how  to  pity  and  console  ?  This  may  be  part 
of  your  education  for  the  ministry ;  but  such 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQUHOUN.  249 

desertion  shall  not  always  last  (Isaiah  liv.  7,  8, 
10),  and  perhaps  it  shall  be  succeeded  by  bright 
and  cloudless  sunshine.  In  the  meantime  I 
would  say,  place  yourself  in  the  everlasting 
arms,  whether  God  smiles  or  hides  his  counte- 
nance. Let  faith  supply  the  lack  of  feeling. 
He  will  not,  he  cannot  cast  you  from  himself. 

"  Continue,  dear  Mr. ,  to  pray  for  Luss. 

It  has  been  very  dead  and  barren  since  I  have 
known  it,  and  is  just  beginning  to  show  symp- 
toms of  life.  I  hear  that  Mr.  Stewart  is  gain- 
ing beyond  the  most  sanguine  expectations, 
and  that  there  is  a  party  much  interested  in 
his  success.  I  am  very  glad  my  son  has  given 
them  the  most  convenient  site  for  a  church." 

In  the  early  summer  of  1844  a  new  and 
affecting  duty  devolved  on  Lady  Colquhoun. 
Her  son,  Sir  James,  had  been  scarcely  a  year 
united  to  a  lady*  whose  youth  and  amiable 
dispositions  promised  a  long  duration  of  hap- 
piness, and  the  rejoicings  over  the  birth  of  a 

*  The  younger  Lady  Colquhoun  was  a  daughter  of  Sir 
Robert  Abercrombie  of  Forglen,  Bart.  She  died  at  Edinburgh 
on  the  3d  of  May,  1844. 


250  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

first-born  had  hardly  been  celebrated  in  his 
hereditary  domains : — 

It  was  an  April  day ;  and  blithely  all 

The  youth  of  nature  leaped  beneath  the  sun, 

"When  tidings  came, 
A  son  was  born;  and  tidings  came  again. 
That  she  who  gave  it  birth  was  sick  to  death. 

The  infant,  thus  bequeathed  to  her  maternal 
tenderness,  became  an  object  of  unceasing 
solicitude  to  his  fond  grandmother;  and  if 
anything  could  have  linked  her  spirit  to  the 
earth  once  more,  that  child  would  have  been 
the  tie.  God  blessed  her  anxious  tending,  and 
her  little  grandson  grew  in  strength  and  stat- 
ure. On  the  rare  occasions  when  she  was 
obliged  to  send  him  from  under  her  immediate 
eye,  a  minute  correspondence  was  maintained 
betwixt  his  attendants  and  herself;  and  in 
thinking  and  planning  for  the  welfare  of  her 
precious  charge,  and  in  watching  the  develop- 
ments of  thought  and  affection,  she  lived  de- 
lightfully over  again  a  by-gone  era  of  her  his- 
tory. 

The  most  appropriate  contribution  which  a 
Christian  lady  can  make  to  the  cause  of  the 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  251 

Gospel  is,  when  she  "  shows  piety  at  home." 
It  is  related  of  a  Scottish  lawyer  who  rose  to  a 
high  judicial  station  in  England,  tliat  with 
infinite  pains  he  had  exchanged  his  vernacular 
pronunciation  for  a  somewhat  finical  English 
accent ;  but  when  he  became  old  and  infirm, 
they  say  that  nature  cropped  out  again,  and 
that  it  was  curious  to  observe  the  broad  Shib- 
boleths of  boyhood  taking  a  late  but  ample 
vengeance  on  the  euphuistic  orator.  And 
where  piety  is  like  Lord  Loughborough's  Eng- 
lish,— a  thing  picked  up  or  put  on, — it  is  liable 
to  similar  casualties.  In  life's  least  guarded 
or  least  brilliant  moments,  in  languor,  in  sick- 
ness, in  moments  of  vexation,  carnality  tri- 
umphs over  profession ;  and  the  spleen,  or  the 
passion,  or  the  worldly-mindedness  which  was 
all  unsuspected  by  the  admiring  committee  or 
the  parlor  coterie^  is  revealed  without  scruple 
to  the  domestic  circle.  But  the  piety  of  Lady 
Colquhoun  was  such  a  pervasion  that  the 
minutest  action  and  the  most  familiar  moment 
could  only  reveal  the  Christian.  "  She  be- 
haved herself  wisely  in  a  perfect  way,  she 
walked  within  her  house  with  a  perfect  heart ;" 
and  her  uniform  and  attractive  goodness  com- 


252  LIFE    OP    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

mended  the  Gospel  to  her  servants,  to  her 
family,  and  to  the  stranger  sojourning  within 
her  gates. 

For  many  years  she  had  been  in  the  habi^ 
of  instructing  her  female  servants  every  Sab 
bath  afternoon  ;  and,  with  her  systematic  per- 
severance, she  often  assembled  them  when 
feeble  health  made  the  exertion  distressing  to 
herself.  Thus,  in  her  journal  we  find  her  la- 
menting the  levity  which  exhibited  itself  on 
one  of  these  occasions  ;  "  for,  considering  the 
pain  it  cost  me  to  speak  to  them,  I  felt  it  rathe* 
hard."  But  it  was  the  tendency  of  such  exer 
tions  for  their  welfare  to  conciliate  the  affec 
tion  of  her  household,  especially  as  they  were 
the  exertions  of  a  most  kind  and  considerate 
mistress.  One  evening,  in  Edinburgh,  she 
rang  the  bell  for  her  maid,  but  was  told  that 
she  had  gone  out  and  had  not  returned.  It 
was  late  before  she  arrived,  and  w4ien  she 
made  her  appearance  Lady  Colqulioun  asked 
where  she  had  been.  "  Taking  tea  with 
my  mother,"  was  the  reply.  But  perceiving 
her  embarrassed  manner,  liady  C.  said,  "  Now, 
I  know  you  are  not  telling  me  the  truth  ;"  and 
the   young  woman   confessed    that   she   had 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQUHOUN.  253 

gone  to  a  theatrical  exhibition,  wliich  was 
later  of  ending  than  she  had  expected.  How- 
ever, it  was  true  that  the  party  had  met  at  her 
mother's  and  taken  tea  beforehand  ;  and  she 
had  intended  to  ask  leave,  but  had  not  found 
opportunity.  Lady  C.  expressed  her  sorrow  at 
the  occurrence,  the  more  especially  as  she  had 
never  before  discovered  in  this  maid  any  devia- 
tion from  the  truth.  She  told  her  how  much 
she  disapproved  of  theatres,  which  had  ruined 
so  many ;  and  reminded  her  how  one  fault 
usually  leads  to  another  ;  "  and  C,"  she  added, 
"I  have  just  been  praying  for  you."  Tears 
started  into  the  young  woman's  eyes  ;  and  she 
begged  forgiveness  of  her  mistress,  solemnly 
promising  never  to  be  guilty  of  the  like  fault 
again,  a  promise  which  she  faithfully  fulfilled. 
But  although  she  objected  to  such  places  of 
resort,  and  would  not  allow  her  servants  to 
spend  the  Sabbath  in  walks  and  visits,  she 
Avas  liberal  in  allowing  them  other  opportuni- 
ties of  amusement,  and  was  especially  de- 
lighted when  they  selected  such  recreations  as 
tended  to  improve  their  minds.  The  servant 
just  mentioned  had  been  attending  some  even- 
ing lectures  on  astronomy,  and  Lady  C.  took 
21 


254  LIFE    OF    LADY    C0LQ.UHOUN. 

great  pleasure  in  hearing  all  that  she  could  re- 
member and  in  helping  her  to  understand  them. 
And  all  the  inmates  of  her  dwelling  were  so 
well  aware  of  her  benevolent  feelings  toward 
them,  that  it  is  not  wonderful  that  they  re- 
ceived with  increasing  gratitude  her  endeavors 
to  promote  their  truest  welfare.  ''  There  was 
not  one  in  the  household  who  did  not  love  and 
reverence  her,  and  who  would  not  have  done 
anything  to  serve  her."  And  if  her  instruc- 
tions have  not  been  followed  by  lasting  results 
in  every  case,  none  who  were  connected  with 
her  can  ever  forget  how  holy  and  unblama- 
ble was  her  daily  demeanor. 

With  a  few  final  extracts  from  her  diary,  we 
shall  conclude  the  active  portion  of  this  history. 
They  will  supply  some  omissions  in  the  narra- 
tive, and  they  will  show  how  the  Lord  was 
preparing  his  servant  for  her  everlasting  rest. 

"127,  George-street^  Edinhurgh^  Monday^ 
Dec.  25,  1843. — Having  omitted  to  bring  my 
diary  here  with  me,  I  have  neglected  writing 
for  some  weeks.  Here  I  have  been  enjoying 
the  highest  privileges,  for  which  at  some  periods 
of  my  life  I  would  have  given  anything.     I  am 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  255 

in  the  same  lodgings  with  Mr.  WilUani  Burns, 
having  the  two  best  floors,  and  he  some  rooms 
above.  I  am  thus  enabled  to  attend  his  family- 
worship  night  and  morning,  and  he  preaches 
regularly  every  Sabbath  morning  and  twice 
during  the  week.  To-day  I  was  again  feasted 
at  his  class  for  young  women  by  his  exposition 
of  the  question,  What  is  God  ?  I  had  before, 
nearly  two  years  ago  I  think,  heard  part  of  this 
sublime  subject  with  inexpressible  delight,  but 
left  Edinburgh  before  he  finished  it,  little  hoping 
to  hear  any  more.  Now,  if  spared  in  health,  I 
may  hear  the  rest.  Lord,  grant  it,  and  the 
blessing  ! 

"  31. — Arrived  at  the  end  of  another  year, 
what  can  I  say  of  myself  in  it  ?  Perhaps  I  little 
know  or  think  of  my  neglected  duties,  or  many 
sins,  but  my  heart  does  not  smite  me  much; 
and  yet  I  see  others  in  labors  much  more  abun- 
dant, as  dear  Mr.  Burns  in  this  house,  com- 
plaining bitterly  of  unprofitableness.  It  is  prob- 
able tbat  I  am  contented  with  a  very  low  state 
both  of  feeling  and  labor.  Let  me  press  onward 
and  forward.  I  took  the  family  worship,  as  I 
do  always  on  the  Sabbaths,  as  Mr.  Burns  is 
late  of  returning  from  the  young  men's  class. 


256  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

"  March  10, 1844.— I  find  more  than  a  month 
has  elapsed  and  I  have  omitted  writing  here. 
A  passage  from  '  Dorney's  Letters'  came  to 
me  with  power  and  comfort.  '  The  soul  that 
is  willing  Christ  should  both  save  him  and 
purge  him,  shall  be  saved  and  purged  ;  and 
God  cannot  but  account  him  clean  from  con- 
demning guilt.'  I  have  made  an  attempt  to 
lead  one,  who  I  fear  has  been  afar  off,  and 
have  lent  a  book  with  faith  and  prayer  ('  Wil- 
berforce's  View').  From  my  being  enabled  to 
pray,  I  hope  well  in  this. 

"  Maixh  17. — My  heart  is  rejoiced  this 
evening  by  one  of  the  servant-girls  in  these 
lodgings,  whom  I  have  been  teaching,  with  the 
other,  on  the  Sabbaths,  telling  me  that  what  I 
said  to  her  on  prayer  had  been  much  blessed 
to  her,  and  that  she  now  found  many  oppor- 
tunities to  pray,  and  was  happy  in  Christ.  O 
Lord  !  truly  I  praise  thee  for  this.  Humbly 
and  gratefully  I  thank  Thee  for  making  me 
the  honored  instrument  in  thy  glorious  work. 
Bless  and  protect  this  poor  girl,  and  build  hei 
up  in  the  faith ;  and  may  she  glorify  Thee 
eternally  ! 

"  April  14. — An  event  of  some  importance 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQUHOUN.  257 

to  our  family  has  occurred  since  I  last  wrote 
here, — the  birth  of  a  son  to  my  son,  Sir  James. 
His  mother  has  been  very  dehcate  since ;  but 
all  is  in  the  hand  of  God  ;  to  Him  I  commit 
them,  believing  that  He  will  do  well.  To-day 
I  feel  rather  unwell,  and  am  the  less  unwilling 
to  remain  at  home,  as  (it  is  somewhat  strange) 
I  almost  always  find  God  more  present  during 
the  Sabbath-day  when  thus  confined,  than 
when  attending  ordinances.  Oh  !  it  is  God^ 
not  ordinances,  I  seek.  Wherever  He  is  present, 
I  would  be.  And  this  day  He  icas  present, 
especially  during  the  hours  of  the  morning 
service.  A  letter  received  lately  from  Mr. 
Denniston,  of  Jamaica,  with  some  observations 
on  walking  with  God,  was  blessed  to  me  this 
morning. 

'•  28. — A  communion  Sabbath.  I  was  privi- 
leged to  hear  Mr.  A.  Bonar,  Mr.  Somerville, 
and  Dr.  Duncan,  on  the  previous  days,  but 
without  any  particular  blessing ;  when,  last 
\-\vA\U  a  friend  said  she  had  been  exhorted 
simply  to  receive  Christ's  broken  body,  as 
broken  for  her  sins,  and  his  shed  blood  as  shed 
for  her;  and  these  few  words  brought  joy  and 
faith  with  them,  which  remained  with  me  at 
22* 


258  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLCIUHOUN. 

the  table  ;  I  was  enabled  to  see  a  little  of  the 
Lord's  beauty,  and  rejoice  in  Him.  My  daughter- 
in-law  continues  in  a  most  precarious  state  ;  it 
seems  uncertain  whether  or  not  she  will  re- 
cover. I  have  told  her  of  the  danger,  and 
prayed  with  her  several  times. 

"  May  5. — A  different  Sabbath  indeed  from 
the  last.  Lady  Colquhoun  having  departed  this 
Hfe  on  Friday  afternoon.  I  witnessed  her 
death,  and  have  been  since  almost  constantly 
with  my  son,  at  132,  George-street.  The 
infant  hves,  and  will  be  my  precious  charge. 
Thus  a  fresh  hue  of  duty  and  care  devolves 
upon  me,  different,  indeed,  from  what  I  should 
have  sought.  I  am  dumb  ;  I  open  not  my 
mouth  :  for  God  has  done  this.  It  is  His  way, 
therefore  a  right  way. 

"  May  19. — I  am  beginning  to  awake  from 
the  dream  of  late  events,  in  my  family,  and  am 
also  beginning,  I  hope,  to  return  to  the  Lord. 
I  am  certainly  led  in  a  way  I  would  not  in 
present  circumstances ;  but  it  must  be  right. 
It  goes  to  my  heart  when  I  recollect  my  dear 
little  boy  at  Stutton,  and  my  religious  instruc- 
tions of  him  last  summer,  and  that  now  we 
cannot  meet.     One   thing   sweetly   reconciles 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  259 

me, — God  did  it.  I  was  present  at  the  open- 
ing of  the  Free  Assembly,  and  enjoyed  it 
much. 

"  26. — I  was  once  or  twice  more  at  the  Meet- 
ings of  Assembly,  which  are  truly  solemn  and 
interesting;  but  having  caught  cold,  I  am 
now  debarred  from  them,  and  also  from  ordi- 
nances, to-day.  I  have,  however,  found  God 
in  private,  both  in  reading  and  prayer.  I  lie 
very  low  because  of  shortcoming  and  sin  ;  but 
I  feel  the  value  of  the  sacrifice  offered  for  it, 
and  see  something  of  that  righteousness  which 
is  unto  all  and  upon  all  them  that  believe. 
Throughout  the  day  my  heart  has  rested  on 
God  as  my  portion.  Oh,  how  precious  !  Thus 
at  times  creatures,  the  whole  creation,  keep 
their  just  place  in  my  regard.  I  pant  for  more 
of  this. 

"  Rossd/m,  August  11. — Was  much  blessed 
in  the  house  of  prayer  to-day,  Mr.  Stew- 
art preaching  on  the  freedom  of  the  Gospel 
offer,  from  John  iii.  15.  I  had  longed  to  hear 
him  on  this  subject ;  and  it  was  very  joyful  to 
me  to  hear  Christ  so  freely  and  unconditionally 
preached  at  Luss.  Lord,  thou  hast  given  us 
much    in   this   Church,    and  in   this   thy   de- 


260  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

voted  servant  as  our  pastor ;  yet  all  this  may- 
be without  the  blessing.  For  the  Holy  Ghost 
I  pray;  earnestly,  unweariedly  I  pray  for  the 
descent  of  the  Spirit  upon  this  place  and 
people.  I  pray  in  faith,  and,  looking  up,  ex- 
pect the  answer.  I  think  I  shall  yet,  if  spared, 
write  here  that  I  am  heard.  O  Lord,  hasten 
the  time  ! 

''  Sept.  8. — The  three  last  Sabbaths  Lady 
Sinclair  and  my  sisters  were  here.  They  were 
tolerably  well  spent ;  in  some  of  them  I  was 
enabled  to  return  to  the  evening  service.  Our 
good  pastor  was  absent  last  Lord's-day,  having 
lost  a  sister,  who  died  in  the  Lord.  To-day 
Mr.  Stewart  gave  us  a  dehghtful  sermon  on 
Christ  the  Resurrection  and  the  Life.  It  came 
home  to  my  heart.  Surely  I  possess  this 
spiritual  life.  I  feel  something  within  me  that 
lives  to  God,  that  delights  in  God,  that  cannot 
exist  without  God,  that  must  be  derived  from 
God.  And  if  this  new  nature  be,  in  the  first 
instance,  imparted  without  a  right  or  title,  it 
shall  be  preserved  and  strengthened  unto  ever- 
lasting life.  These  and  such  thoughts  have 
been  very  joyful  to  me  this  day.  I  also  felt 
truly  grateful  to  the  Almighty  that  there  is 


LIFE    OP    LADY    COLCIUHOUN.  261 

such  a  change  to  the  better  in  my  Gospel  priv- 
ileges here.     Oh,  thanks  be  unto  God  for  this  ! 

"  Dec.  15. — We  httle  know  wiiat  a  day  may 
bring  forth.  Nearly  a  fortnight  ago  I  fell  down 
thirteen  steps  of  a  stair,  and  was  much  bruised ; 
but,  most  providentially,  had  no  bone  broken, 
and  was  not  otherwise  injured.  It  is  singular 
that  this  fall  has  been  the  means  of  prayer  be- 
ing answered  :  and,  between  a  sense  of  grati- 
tude for  that,  and  for  my  merciful  preseiTation, 
my  heart  has  been  full  of  thankfulness  and 
praise.  I  was  about  a  week  confined  to  bed  ; 
but  never  was  God  so  present  with  me  in  ill- 
ness, I  could  pray  always,  and  rejoice  too. 
Mr.  Stewart  visits  me  often,  and  has  been  a 
great  comfort  to  me.  1  was  still  unable  to  go 
out  to-day.  My  dear  daughter  and  Mr.  Reade, 
with  his  little  boy,  are  now  here. 

"  Jan.  5,  1845. — I  am  now  able  to  attend  in 
God's  house,  and  have  been  there  the  two  last 
Sabbaths.  I  am  happy  with  many  of  my  fami- 
ly about  me  ;  but,  alas  !  intercourse  with  otliers 
has  in  some  measure  deadened  my  heart  to 
God.  I  look  back  to  my  sick-bed  with  some- 
thins:  like  regret,  for  then  I  was  with  Him  all 
day ;  yet  He  will  never  leave  nor  forsake  me. 


262  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHO  UN. 

"  March  20. — How  uncertain  are  all  things 
here  !  This  day  weel:  Lady  Sinclair,  my  kind 
friend  and  stepmother,  was  taken  ill  with  a  bil- 
ious attack,  and  to-day  is  in  that  state  we  can- 
not say  when  she  may  be  taken  hence.  I  went 
in  a  chair  to  see  her  yesterday  and  to-day,  be- 
ing unw^ell  myself.  It  is  a  sorrowing  family. 
I  prayed  with  them,  and  said  what  I  could. 
Oh  !  for  a  sanctified  use  of  the  afflictions  that 
are  thickening  around  them  ;  for  my  sister,  Mrs. 
Stewart,  has  long  been  also  in  a  very  precari- 
ous way,  but  seems  to  rest  on  the  Rock  of 
Ages.  Lord,  how  soon  may  such  a  time  as 
this  come  to  me !  I  feel  this  evening  united  to 
Christ. 

'•27. — How  much  have  I  to  write  this  even- 
ing !  My  kind  friend.  Lady  Sinclair,  is  no 
more ;  my  sister,  Mrs.  Stewart,  also  gone.  I 
was  much  with  the  former ;  but  her  recollec- 
tion was  greatly  impaired,  and  she  could  say 
little  on  any  subject.  I  saw  her  after  death. 
Ah  !  how  solemn  was  the  scene  ! — how  sad  the 
feelings  of  her  sorrowing  family  !  Yesterday 
she  was  consigned  to  the  same  grave  at  Holy- 
rood,  where  my  father  hcs.  Mrs.  Stewart  gave 
pleasing  evidence  of  being  in  a  state  of  salva- 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN.  263 

tion.  Oh  to  be  ready  when  my  summons  shall 
come !  To-day  I  commemorated  my  Lord's 
death  in  St.  Luke's. 

"  Rossdhii,  Oct.  19. — I  think  grace  grows  ; 
but  it  is  downward  growth.  It  is  a  greater 
sense  of  need,  and  a  feeling  that  none  but 
Christ  can  help.  To-day  I  was  thinking  that 
I  have  every  reason  to  trust  that  the  '  Beloved 
is  mine,'  because  he  has  me  so  heartily  willing 
to  be  saved  in  his  own  way. 

"  Jan.  4,  1846. — I  begin  another  year  in 
health  and  comfort.  This  is  the  first  day  of 
the  Concert  for  Prayer.  I  heartily  joined  in 
petitioning  for  an  abundant  outpouring  of  the 
precious  Spirit ;  and  I  intend  meeting  with  the 
servants  during  the  week,  in  accordance  with 
the  appointment  of  our  Church.  I  had  an  an- 
swer to  prayer  last  week.  How  merciful  is  our 
God! 

"  25. — Probably  the  last  Sabbath  here,  as  we 
propose  leaving  for  Edinburgh  on  Wednesday. 
I  pray  earnestly  for  a  blessing  on  the  congrega- 
tion and  its  pastor,  and  on  the  parish, — a  new 
minister  having  been  appointed  for  the  Estab- 
lished Church.  I  do  hope  that  this  change  will 
not  prove  unimportant,  but  that  some  good  may 


264  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQUHOUN. 

come  of  it,  and  the  hand  of  God  be  seen  in  it. 
I  put  my  trust  in  Him  for  many  things  now  de- 
pending on  his  providence. 

"  18,  Ainslie-place,  Edinburgh^  April  12. — 
Since  writing  iiere  a  fortnight  ago,  I  have  gone 
through  a  good  deal.  A  few  days  after,  I  be- 
came very  feverish,  and  about  a  week  was 
nearly  confined  to  bed.  I  suffered  also,  and 
still  suffer,  from  a  depressing  nervousness, 
which  is  hard  to  bear, — disturbing  my  rest  at 
night,  and  taking  away  my  peace  by  day. 
Yet  I  think  this  illness  has  been  blessed  to  me. 
Christ  has  appeared  very  precious ;  and  al- 
though at  times  I  could  scarcely  see  my  inter- 
est in  Him,  at  other  times  I  could  embrace  the 
simple  promise,  and  hold  Him  fast,  and  not  let 
Him  go  without  a  blessing.  Sick  and  in  bed 
last  Lord's-day,  I  could  do  nothing  but  offer  a 
few  words  of  prayer.  To-day  I  am  able  to  be 
up,  and  am  rapidly  recovering ;  but  being 
nervous,  I  thought,  'How  shall  I  spend  my 
sacred  hoars?'  Looking  through  some  books 
that  had  been  lent  me  by  my  sister  Catherine, 
I  alighted  on  '  The  True  Christian,'  by  .Tones, 
of  Creaton.  Here  I  found  much  just  suited  to 
my  need.     All  seemed  encouraging  ;  and  many 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN.  265 

times  to-day  I  have  been  receiving  Christ  and 
all  his  fidness.  In  writing  of  this  illness,  I 
must  not  forget  to  notice  my  many  temporal 
blessings.  God  has  given  me  all  I  possibly 
could  desire.  Truly,  'He  has  made  all  my 
bed  in  my  sickness.' 

''  19. — Although  still  feeble,  I  have  been  pro- 
gressing towards  complete  recovery  during  the 
week.  Thanks  to  a  gracious  God !  I  have 
felt  great  benefit  from  this  illness.  I  never  so 
strongly  saw  my  need  of  Christ,  nor  so  fully 
closed  with  him.  Reading  this  morning  in 
Jones's  little  book,  I  felt  assured  that  what  he 
describes  as  certain  marks  of  the  new  nature, 
— the  love  of  God  for  what  He  is  ;  the  love  of 
holiness  ;  the  love  of  the  Spirit  wherever  seen  ; 
the  love  of  the  law, — I  felt  convinced  that  these 
marks  are  mine,  and  something  like  assurance 
grew  upon  it. 

"  26. — I  communicated  in  Free  St.  Stephen's, 
and  scarcely  ever  enjoyed  so  much  in  the  sac- 
ramental feast.  I  was  fed  in  last  wreck's  pre- 
paratory services ;  but  especially  to-day,  both 
in  the  sanctuary  and  at  home,  God  was  pres- 
ent. I  awoke  early,  and,  before  rising,  read 
with  much  delight  the  sixth  chapter  of  John. 
23 


266  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

Mr.  Gillies,  on  the  love  of  Christ,  from  John 
xiii.  1,  was  truly  delightful.  Dr.  James  Bu- 
chanan served  the  second  table,  and  followed 
in  the  same  strain,  from  '  Christ  loved  the 
Church,  and  gave  himself  for  it.'  I  have  heard 
soul-refreshing  truths,  and  I  have  given  myself 
to  the  Lord,  and  rejoice  in  his  love.  God  ena- 
bling me,  I  will  henceforth  confide  in  Him  more. 
"  Rossdhu,  June  28. — Many  weeks  have 
elapsed  since  I  was  able  to  note  down  my 
spiritual  state  and  feelings.  I  have  been  very 
ill ;  and,  after  coming  here  from  Edinburgh, 
was  obliged  to  return  to  it  for  medical  advice. 
The  Almighty  directed  me  to  Dr.  Simpson, 
who  at  once  saw  the  root  of  the  evil,  and  whose 
method  of  treatment  has,  under  Providence, 
given  me  great  relief.  The  nervousness  which 
so  distressed  me  is  gone.  I  have  had  a  sight 
of  death  :  for  when  one  attack  followed  another, 
I  often  thought  I  might  not  recover.  Alas !  I 
never  can  view  it  with  that  desire  to  depart 
which  many  of  God's  cliildren  feel.  However, 
in  this,  as  in  everything  else,  I  must  lean  upon 
the  Beloved,  and  hope  He  will  guide  me  in 
safety  through  the  dark  valley.  I  seem  to 
have  been  at  school,  and  trust  I  have  learned 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  267 

something,  especially  my  helplessness,  woith- 
lessness,  utter  insufficiency.  Against  this 
could  I  but  set  Christ's  strength,  worth,  suffi- 
ciency, all  would  be  well.  I  was  five  weeks  in 
EdinburglT,  and  returned  two  days  ago.  God 
has  mercifully  kept  my  little  grandson  in  health 
during  my  absence,  and  all  has  been  mercifully 
ordered. 

"  July  5. — Not  well,  but  continuing  to  re- 
cover. Was  at  church,  and  heard  a  missionary, 
Mr.  Strachan,  preach,  on  Luke  i.  76—79.  How 
dark,  how"  awful  would  have  been  our  thoughts 
regarding  futurity,  had  not  the  tender  mercy  of 
our  God  caused  the  Day-spring  to  visit  us,  giv- 
ing knowledsre  of  salvation  and  the  remission 
of  sins  !  Blessed  knowledge !  most  needful 
remission  !  Deeply,  most  deeply  do  I  feel  my 
need  of  it." 


CHAPTER  VII. 


PRECIOUS    IX    THE    SIGHT     OF    THE     LORD    IS     THE    DEATH    OF 
SAINTS. PSALM  CXVI.   15. 


The  quiet  chamber  where  the  Christian  sleeps, 
And  where,  from  year  to  year,  he  prays  and  weeps ; 
Whence,  in  the  midnight  watch,  his  thoughts  arise 
To  those  briglit  mansions  where  his  treasure  lies, — 
How  near  it  is  to  ail  his  faith  can  see  ! 
Yes,  for  that  bliss  unspeakable,  unseen, 
Is  ready,  and  the  veil  of  flesh  between 
A  gentle  sigh  may  rend,  ai\d  then  display 
The  broad,  full  splendor  of  an  eudless  day. 

JANE    TAYLOR. 


The  last  chapter  left  the  subject  of  this 
Memoir  in  shattered  health  ;  and  from  its 
depressing  influence  on  the  nervous  system, 
the  illness  of  that  spring  was  at  first  pecuharly 
painful.  The  temperament  of  Lady  Colqu- 
houn  was  in  unison  with  her  sober  judgment, 
and  any  deviations  from  its  habitual  tran- 
quillity were  generally  in  a  cheerful  direction  ; 
and   so   seldom  was   her  religious   experience 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  269 

tinctured  with  gloom,  that  she  had  a  very 
imperfect  sympathy  with  the  deep  dejection  of 
some  eminent  Christians,  in  whose  biography 
she  otherwise  fomid  dehght  and  instruction. 
When,  therefore,  dreary  or  disconsolate  weeks 
were  appointed,  she  felt  as  if  some  strange 
thing  had  happened  to  her;  but,  instead  of 
yielding  to  despondency,  her  sound  understand- 
ing ascribed  to  its  real  pathological  origin  this 
withdrawment  of  sensible  comfort,  and  with 
unshaken  confidence  she  rested  still  on  the 
Rock  of  her  Salvation;  and  through  her 
heavenly  Father's  tender  mercy,  this  trying 
attendant  on  her  malady  was  ere  long  suc- 
ceeded by  her  wonted  serenity. 

Having  come  to  Rossdhu  in  May,  as  has 
ah-eady  been  mentioned,  she  was  obliged  to 
return  to  Edinburgh  for  medical  advice  almost 
immediately.  There,  in  much  weakness,  she 
spent  the  month  of  June;  and  we  have  now 
before  us  the  notes,  neatly,  but  feebly  written, 
in  which  she  conveyed  tidings  of  her  progress 
to  her  servants  at  home.  To  her  attached 
housekeeper  she  wrote, — 

^^  Monday. — Your  few  lines,  which  I  received 
23* 


270  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

this  morning-,  gave  me  pleasure, — to  hear  of 
the  dear  child's  keeping  well,  and  that  all  is 
going  on  comfortably.  I  am  able  to  be  up 
now,  and  in  the  parlor;  but  this  last  illness 
has  thrown  me  back.  I  would  say  I  am  sorry, 
but  am  silenced  by  the  thought, — it  is  the 
Lord.  Dr.  Simpson  is  now  to  go  on  with  his 
prescriptions,  to  which  the  Lord  can  give 
efficacy  if  so  seemeth  Him  good.  But  what  if 
now  should  be  His  time  to  call  me  hence?  I 
should  be  '  also  ready.'  He  will  do  well.  I  do 
not  know  that  there  is  much  cause  for  alarm. 
I  have  less  nervousness,  and  sleep  better.  VYe 
have  comfortable  lodgings.  I  am  in  good 
hands.  (Deut.  xxxiii.  3.)  I  am  happy  you 
had  such  good  assistance  at  the  communion. 
"  Your  sincere  friend, — J.  C." 

To  her  little  grandson,  now  two  years  old, 
she  had  always  shown  the  tenderest  affection, 
and  a  chief  part  of  her  present  trial  was  sep- 
aration from  him.  Many  of  these  notes  are 
addressed  to  his  nurse  : — 

"  May  29. — I  was  very  glad  indeed  to  hear 
that  my  dear  little  boy  continued  strong,  and 
was  behaving  well.     May  God  in  mercy  watch 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  271 

over  him,  and  bring  me  back  to  him  in  com- 
fort !  I  sometimes  feel  the  thought  that  (poor 
little  fellow !)  he  cannot  understand  why  I 
have  left  him.  I  am  going  on  with  the  means 
prescribed,  and  have  less  of  the  nervousness 
than  1  had,  and  I  sleep  better.  I  am  out  as 
much  as  possible,  and  have  every  reason  to  be 
thankful  for  goodness  and  mercy  following 
me." 

In  the  beginning  of  July  she  returned  to 
Dumbartonshire,  recruited  ;  but  on  tlie  18th 
of  tbat  month  an  aguish  fever  compelled  her 
to  hasten  back  to  Edinburgh.  There  again 
the  means  were  blessed  ;  and  she  recovered 
strength  enough  to  bear  Dr.  Gordon  and  Mr. 
Gillies  preach,  and  was  able  to  pay  a  visit  to 
the  venerable  widow  of  her  old  pastor.  Dr. 
Buchanan.  When  Lady  Colquhoun  rose  to 
take  leave,  her  aged  friend  insisted  on  accom- 
panying her  to  the  door ;  and  to  the  gentle  re- 
monstrance of  ber  niece,  replied,  "  It  is  the 
last  time."'  She  did  not  tbink  tliat  the 
younger  was  to  go  iir^t,  for  her  "  own  time  was 
not  yet." 

From  Edinburgh,  about  the  middle  of  Au- 
gust, she  proceeded  to  Helensburgh,  and  was 


272  LIFE    OP    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

sufficiently  well  to  take  a  lively  interest  in 
every  movenieot  afFccting  ilie  welfare  of  the 
Redeeiner's  kingdom.  She  had  there,  in  the 
preceding  year,  organized  a  branch  of  the 
Irish  Home  Mission  ;  and  whilst  its  affairs 
gave  her  some  occupation,  she  was  greatly 
cheered  by  accounts  of  the  progress  made  by 
Hindoo  girls  attending  the  schools  of  her 
favorite  Society  in  India.  A  month's  sojourn 
on  the  coast  apparently  revived  her  strength ; 
and  at  the  period  of  her  final  return  to  Ross- 
dhu,  her  habitual  language  was  gratitude  to 
the  Father  of  all  mercies.  Peaceful  slumber 
was  a  boon  which  she  now  frequently  enjoyed, 
and  had  learned  exceedingly  to  prize  ;  and  in 
the  mornings  she  would  frequently  say,  "How 
thankful  should  I  be  when  I  think  of  Mrs. 
Cathcart !''  Mrs.  C.  had  been  deprived  of  rest 
at  night  for  a  long  time  before  her  death, — the 
only  true  repose  she  could  obtain  being  a  short 
sleep  in  the  evening,  on  a  sofa  in  the  drawing- 
room. 

On  the  29Lh  of  September,  when  out  walk- 
ing, she  was  overtaken  in  a  shower,  and 
obliged  to  seek  shelter  under  a  tree.  She  her- 
self apprehended  no  injury,  and  smiled  at   Uie 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  273 

excessive  caution  of  her  family  in  sending  out 
cloaks  and  shawls.  Next  inoining,  however, 
she  complained  of  sore  throat  and  fever ;  but 
though  that  morning  she  appeared  at  the 
breakfast-table,  and  for  two  days  continued  to 
go  about  and  converse  with  her  usual  cheerful- 
ness, she  evidently  grew  worse,  and  before 
Sabbath  the  4th  of  October,  she  had  taken  to 
that  bed  from  which  she  was  never  again  to 
arise.  On  that  first  Sabbath  of  her  illness,  one 
of  the  servants,  to  whom  she  had  often  spoken 
on  the  concerns  of  her  soul,  came  into  the 
room  ;  and,  after  saying  a  few  kind  words  to 
her,  Lady  Colquhoun  offered  to  pray  with  her, 
as  she  had  frequently  done  in  other  days. 
The  brief  but  touching  prayer  will  not  readily 
be  forgotten  by  her  on  whose  behalf  it  w^as 
offered,  all  the  rather,  that  every  utterance 
had  now  become  an  exertion.  To  one  of 
her  family  that  day  she  said  emphatically, 
"'Christ  is  all  my  salvation  and  all  my  de- 
sire.' I  hope  for  salvation  in  nothing  but 
Christ."' 

At  an  early  period  of  her  illness  she  sent  for 
Sir  James,  desiring  to  speak  to  him  alone. 
She  told  him  that  before  she  became  too  ill, 


274  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLGIUHOUN. 

she  wanted  to  give  directions  about  her  fune- 
ral ;  that  she  did  not  wish  to  have  any  one 
invited  but  the  nearest  relations,  and  that  it 
should  be  quite  private.  She  then  sent  for 
her  youngest  son,  and  with  perfect  composure 
told  them  her  apprehension  as  to  the  result, 
adding,  "  I  die  at  the  foot  of  the  cross."  Next 
day  she  gave  her  youngest  son  directions  re- 
garding certain  charities,  one  of  which  was, 
that  the  sum  she  had  paid  for  the  education 
of  a  theological  student  should  be  continued 
till  his  college  course  was  ended.  "  I  see,"  she 
said,  "  that  you  are  affected;  but  I  know  that 
you  will  pay  attention  to  my  wishes,  as  I  have 
not  left  them  as  bequests  in  my  will."  She 
then  subjoined  with  great  earnestness,  "Christ 
is  my  Portion ;  and,  oh !  what  a  Portion ! 
Seek  that  Portion." 

A  message  had  been  sent  to  Edinburgh  for 
Dr.  Simpson.  His  partner.  Dr.  Keith,  arrived 
on  the  6th,  and  stayed  all  night ;  Dr.  Simpson 
came  on  the  9th ;  and  during  the  remainder 
of  her  illness — an  attack  of  dysentery  then 
prevalent, — one  or  other  of  these  distinguished 
practitioners  was  frequently  with  her,  doing 
all  that  skill  and  kindness  could  devise,  often 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  275 

to  the  great  tempoiaiy  relief  of  their  patient. 
But  from  her  first  seizure  she  herself  seemed 
to  have  only  one  impression  regarding  the 
issue.  About  a  week  after  its  commencement 
she  said  to  one  of  the  household,  "  Mrs.  L.,  I 
am  convinced  that  this  illness  is  to  end  in 
death  ;  and  I  have  just  one  hope — only  one, — • 
and  that  is,  the  finished  work  of  Jesus."  On 
her  attendant  expressing  a  hope  that  she  might 
recover,  she  answered,  "  Oh,  no  !  And  for  me 
to  live  would  be  Christ,  but  to  die  will  be  gain, 
— unspeakable  gain  ;"  and  then,  after  a  short 
prayer,  she  musingly  added,  "And  shall  I  see 
Him  as  He  is — so  soon  ?  And  shall  I  join  the 
Redeemed  around  the  throne?  Overwhelm- 
ing thought !"  The  next  day, — and  it  was 
the  only  day  that  she  so  complained, — she 
spoke  as  if  under  a  cloud,  and  requested  that 
those  words  might  be  read  to  her  (Isa.  xliii. 
1 — 3)^  "  Fear  not :  for  I  have  redeemed  thee, 
I  have  called  thee  by  thy  name ;  thou  art 
mine.  When  thou  passest  through  the  waters, 
I  will  be  with  thee;  and  through  the  rivers, 
they  shall  not  overflow  thee :  when  thou  walk- 
est  through  the  fire,  thou  shalt  not  be  burned  ; 
neither  shall  the  flame  kindle  upon  thee.     For 


276  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

I  am  the  Lord  thy  G  d,  the  Holy  One  of  Israel, 
thy  Saviour."  But  after  that  she  seemed  to 
be  no  more  distarbecu  often  saying,  "  What  a 
blessing:  it  is  that  the  enemy  is  kept  away  !" 
And  from  her  lips  were  constantly  dropping 
such  expressions  a^,  "The  righteous  hath 
hope  in  his  death."  "I  know  that  my  Re- 
deemer livetli."  "  I  cannot  praise  Him  as  I 
would  ;  but  I  shall  yet  praise  Him  in  perfec- 
tion ;    yes,  through  all  eternity." 

She  earnestly  desired  to  see  her  daughter, 
Mrs.  Pago  Reade ;  but  as  the  distance  was 
great,  feared  that  she  might  not  reach  Rossdhu 
in  time  to  see  her  alive. 

It  was  a  great  delight  to  her  when  her  sec- 
ond son  arrived  from  Edinburgli.  Slie  took 
his  hand,  saying  "That  dear  hand  !"  and  after 
conversing  cheerfully  and  minutely  with  him 
about  his  family,  she  ended  by  affectionately 
giving  him  her  blessing. 

Two  lovely  features  of  Christian  character 
were  very  observable  during  this  illness,  a  sweet 
acquiescence  in  the  will  of  God  a'ld  a  constant 
mindfulness  of  others.  Her  suiTerings  were 
often  very  great,  but  she  bore  them  without  a 
murmur.     Oa  one  occasion,  when  the  pain  was 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  277 

violent,  and  in  eagerness  for  speedy  relief  many 
palliatives  were  tried  in  quick  succession,  she 
said  to  one  of  the  servants,  "I  fear  you  will 
think  me  impatient ;"  and  the  servant,  who 
was  only  thinking  of  her  mistress's  sufferings, 
could  give  no  answer  but  by  bursting  into 
tears.  Another  time,  when  her  daughter  was 
expressing  the  hope  that  she  might  yet  be 
spared  to  them,  her  answer  was,  "  And  would 
you  wish  to  keep  me  here  ?  You  don't  know 
what  I  suffer."  Then  recollecting  how  these 
words  might  be  understood,  and  alarmed  at 
the  idea  of  their  conveying  an  impression  of 
repining,  with  a  look  of  anguish  she  exclaim- 
ed, "Oh,  do  I  complain?  I  did  not  mean  to 
complain.  I  retract  these  words."  And  when 
there  was  any  abatement  of  suffering,  she  took 
care  to  apprize  those  near  her,  often  by  a  sin- 
gle word  when  she  could  say  no  more,  '•  Better, 
easy, — easier,"  or  "The  Lord  be  praised  for 
that."  And  in  perfect  self-forgetfulness,  her 
great  concern  was  for  the  health  and  comfort 
of  those  who  ministered  to  her.  In  deep 
weakness  slie  would  remember  the  minutest 
precautions  lest  her  daughter  might  catch  cold 
sitting  by  her  bedside  over-night.  During  her 
24 


278  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

own  sickness  the  oldest  inmate  of  the  estab- 
lishment was  very  low, — the  aged  nurse,  Mrs. 
Barbara  Graham.  For  years  this  faithful  ser- 
vant had  been  very  frail  and  almost  bed-ridden, 
and  now,  like  her  kind  mistress,  she  was  rap- 
idly sinking;  and  to  Lady  Colquhoun  it  was  a 
frequent  anxiety,  lest  in  their  attendance  on 
herself  poor  Graham  should  feel  lonely  or  be 
any  way  overlooked.  Amongst  other  relatives 
then  at  Rossdhu  was  her  sister-in-law,  Miss 
Colquhoun ;  and,  speaking  to  her,  she  re- 
marked, "  You  must  find  this  a  dull  house," 
and  she  charged  her  servants  to  do  all  they 
could  for  the  comfort  of  the  guests,  so  that  they 
might  not  be  too  much  reminded  of  her  own 
indisposition. 

She  could  now  take  scarcely  any  sustenance, 
and  as  it  was  with  the  outer,  so  was  it  with 
the  inner  man.  Her  soul  desired  no  dainty 
meat.  And  though  she  had  many  favorites  in 
Christian  authorship,  during  these  latter  days 
she  never  asked  a  portion  from  one  of  them. 
In  the  same  way,  though  her  memory  was 
richly  stored  with  hymns  and  spiritual  songs, 
it  looked  as  if  the  familiar  stanzas  were  now 
forgotten.     To  her  the  word  of  God   was  by 


LIFE    OP    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  279 

this  time  everything.  Such  texts  as  Isaiah 
xxxii.  2,  John  xiv.  27,  and  xvii.  24,  Romans 
viii.  32 — 39,  were  cordials  which  her  spirit 
drank  in  when  it  cared  for  nothing  else.  That 
passage  in  the  Romans  was  the  last  to  which 
she  listened,  and  it  is  interesting  to  know  that 
it  is  the  last  which  was  read  to  her  beloved 
sister,  Hannah.  And  though  it  was  an  effort 
to  speak  much,  it  seemed  to  make  the  effort 
less  if  it  were  some  "  tried  word"  that  she  was 
quoting.  Just  previous  to  this  illness  her 
daughter  had  been  suffering  from  headache, 
and  one  day  to  her  affectionate  inquiry  Miss 
Colquhoun  replying  that  she  was  quite  well, 
she  rejoined,  "  He  stayeth  his  rough  wind  in 
the  day  of  his  east  wind."  And  at  the  time 
when  her  precarious  state  was  first  revealed  to 
her  family,  perceiving  Miss  C.  in  deep  distress, 
she  gently  said,  " '  All  his  saints  are  in  thy 
hand.'  Do  you  remember  that?" — alluding  to 
a  sermon  preached  in  the  foregoing  spring,  by 
Mr.  Gillies,  the  notes  of  which  had  aflbrded 
her  singular  delight.  And  at  another  time, 
turning  to  her  daughter  with  a  look  of  ineffable 
fondness,  she  repeated,  "I  will  never  leave 
thee  nor  forsake  thee." 


280  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

About  seven  days  before  her  departure  shi 
sent  for  all  the  servants,  and  spoke  to  them 
separately  on  the  things  of  their  eternal  peace. 
To  one  she  said,  "  Mary,  you  will  soon  lose 
me.  Your  day  may  not  be  so  near,  but  it  is 
coming ;  see  that  you  have  an  interest  in 
Christ  before  that ;  for  what  would  I  do  to-day 
without  him  ?  M.,  don't  forget  me,  and  re- 
member all  I  have  told  you ;  and  be  sure  you 
attend  to  the  preaching  of  the  Word.  I  bene- 
fited much  from  that  in  my  own  youth.  And 
thank  you  for  all  that  you  have  done  for  me." 
To  another  she  said,  "  Look  at  me,  a  poor 
helpless  creature,  and  don't  put  off  preparing 
for  eternity  till  you  come  to  a  death-bed.  May 
the  Lord  be  with  you  !"  To  another,  "  Nov/ 
L,  be  kind  to  Graham  as  long  as  you  have 
her  ;  but  above  all,  oh  remember  your  own 
soul  !  Good-by,  God  bless  you  !"  And  to  one 
in  whose  spiritual  welfare  she  had  much  inter- 
ested herself,  "  Well,  Mary,  I  wish  to  bid  you 
good-by  ;  for  I  will  soon  be  taken  from  you. 
Never  forget  what  I  have  said  to  you ;  and  oh, 
take  Jesus  for  your  friend,  and  then  there  will 
be  no  fear  of  you  ;  good-by,  Mary."  And  great 
as  was  the  exertion  to  her  wasted  frame,  so 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN.  2S1 

intent  was  she  on  addressing  a  word  of  kind- 
ness and  parting  counsel  to  every  one  of  them, 
that,  having  missed  one  of  the  men-servants 
she  sent  a  messenger  to  bring  him.  She  had 
something  suitable  for  each,  and  no  one  was 
overlooked. 

What  else  transpired  within  the  precincts  of 
that  hallowed  chamber  must  be  told  in  the 
words  of  filial  affection  : — "  She  now  felt  as  if 
her  work  were  done.  At  the  same  time  she 
declared  that  she  renounced  all  dependence  on 
anything  she  had  ever  performed,  as  her  best 
was  altogether  sinful ;  adding,  '  Christ  is  my 
hope,  should  be  my  motto ;  I  rely  entirely  on 
his  finished  work.'  To  myself  she  said,  '  My 
death  will  do  you  more  good  than  my  life  could 
do  ;  for  it  will  show  you  more  forcibly  than 
anything  that  can  happen,  the  vanity  of 
earthly  things.'  After  expressing  in  strong 
terms  how  much  she  felt  at  leaving  me  behind, 
she  said,  '  I  wish  I  could  take  you  with  me  ; 
but  God  can  make  up  my  loss  to  you.'  I  told 
her  that  a  letter  had  come  to  her  from  her  be- 
loved friend.  Miss  S.  She  said,  '  Poor  A.  ! 
little  does  she  think  of  the  news  that  awaits 
24* 


282  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

her ;'  but  she  did  not  ask  to  have  the  letter 
read.     Indeed,  she  was  too  ill  to  listen. 

'•  Six  days  before  her  death,  the  nurse  brought 
her  little  grandson  to  the  door  of  her  chamber, 
and  I  asked  if  she  might  bring  him  in.  '  Oh, 
yes,'  she  replied,  '  tell  her  to  bring  him  in  that 
I  may  see  him  for  the  last  time.'  Her  eyes 
were  now  alaiost  constantly  closed,  but  she 
raised  them  and  looked  on  him  with  inexpres- 
sible tenderness.  Then  giving  him  her  bless- 
ing, she  prayed  '■  that  the  Lord  might  make 
him  a  chikl  of  grace,  and  that,  if  spared,  he 
might  yet  witness  for  his  own  cause.'  She 
then  said,  '  I  have  given  him  up  to  God,  and 
commit  him  to  His  care  ;'  and  gave  his  nurse 
her  blessing.  The  dear  child's  look  of  infan- 
tine delight  at  again  beholding  his  grand- 
mamma was  touchingh^  contrasted  with  all  be- 
sides in  that  solemn  scene.  She  spoke  of  her 
daughter,  Mrs.  Reade,  and  of  the  probability 
that  she  and  Mr.  Reade  were  then  on  their 
way.  '  But  tell  Helen  how  much  1  love  her, 
and  give  my  love  to  Mr.  Reade,  and  their 
dear,  dear  little  boy.'  That  evening,  when  all 
the  family  who  were  then  at  home  were  as- 
sembled in  her  apartment,  she  desired  a  light 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUIIOUN.  283 

to  be  brought  near,  and  asked  if  they  saw 
much  change  in  her  appearance ;  but  though 
very  wasted,  it  was  wonderful  how  little  alter- 
ation had  come  over  that  placid  countenance. 

"  On  tlie  morning  of  the  17th,  her  sister  and 
sister-in-law  being  about  to  leave,  came  to  bid 
her  farewell.  To  Miss  Diana  Sinclair  she 
said,  'Set  the  Lord  Jesus  always  before  you, 
and  it  will  be  your  comfort  on  your  death-bed, 
as  it  is  at  this  moment  mine.'  In  a  previous 
interview  her  sister  had  been  much  affected  by 
her  asking,  '  Do  I  not  remind  you  of  Hannah  V 
When  Miss  Colquhoun  afterwards  came  into 
the  room,  she  likewise  exhorted  her  to  go  to 
the  Saviour,  and  embraced  her  affectionately 
and  gave  her  her  blessing.  By  that  day's  post 
intelligence  was  received  that  Mr.  and  Mrs. 
Reade  would  reach  Rossdhu  in  the  evening. 
They  accordingly  arrived  at  seven  o'clock,  hav- 
ing travelled  day  and  night.  The  meeting, 
though  affecting,  was  an  inexpressible  comfort 
to  mother  and  daughter. 

'•  On  first  seeing  Mrs.  Reade,  she  repeated 
'1  am  so  thankful,  I  am  so  thankful;'  adding, 
'  Yesterday  I  never  expected  to  see  you  again 
in  this  world  ;  but  how  merciful  is  my  gracious 


284  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

Lord  to  hear  my  prayers,  that  you  may  re- 
ceive my  parting  blessing  still !'  And  then 
she  continued,  '  But  I  am  much  better  to-day  ; 
indeed,  I  feel  better  since  you  arrived ;  al- 
though you  must  find  me  much  changed. 
However,  we  must  look  from  this  to  the  glori- 
ous change.'  She  then  asked  to  see  Mr.  Reade, 
and  her  young  grandson,  James  Reade,  for 
whom  she  had  alw^ays  evinced  a  great  affec- 
tion. He  was  then  seven  years  old.  Slie  re- 
minded him  of  the  times  when  she  used  to 
take  such  pleasure  in  teaching  him  chapters 
from  the  Bible  and  hymns,  and  when  she 
used  to  tell  him  of  Jesus'  love  to  little  children. 
She  then  asked  him  to  repeat  the  last  six 
verses  of  the  eleventh  chapter  of  Matthew,  and 
then  told  him  that  she  had  no  fears  of  death 
because  she  had  cast  her  '  heavy  load'  on 
Jesus,  who  was  willing  to  receive  'all'  who 
'  came'  to  him.  And  w  hen  she  ended  with 
saying,  '  I  trust,  dear  boy,  we  shall  one  day 
meet  in  heaven  ;  there  is  plenty  of  room  there,' 
and  more  to  the  same  purport,  tears  filled  the 
eyes  of  all  who  overheard  her  simple  exhorta- 
tion." 

Being  so  much  better  that  day,  Mrs.  Reade 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  285 

asked  what  would  be  her  own  wishes  in  regard 
to  recovery.  She  answered  that  lier  only  tie 
to  life  now  would  be  to  be  with  them  all,  and 
then  she  said,  "Perhaps  it  would  be  better  if 
I  went  now,  having  advanced  so  far  on  the 
way  ;  for  even  if  I  do  recover  from  this  illness, 
I  shall  sooner  or  later  have  to  go  through  the 
same  scene  again,  and  at  my  period  of  life  the 
time  must  be  short.'' 

"  A  few  days  before  her  death," — we  resume 
Miss  Oolquhoun's  narrative, — "on  being  raised 
up,  she  remaiked,  with  apparent  satisfaction, 
that  she  could  not  see  out  of  the  window  nor 
distinguish  objects  at  any  distance.  Thank- 
fulness was  still  a  prominent  trait  of  her  dis- 
position, and  every  relief  from  pain  called  forth 
some  grateful  acknowledgment.  '  Thanks, 
Lord,'  was  her  usual  emphatic  expression 
every  time  she  received  her  medicines  or  such 
sligrht  nourishment  as  she  was  able  to  take. 
Dr.  Simpson's  last  visit  was  on  the  night  of  the 
19th,  and  he  w^as  again  the  means  of  allevia- 
ting her  sufferinsfs  for  a  time.  He  could  do  no 
more.  She  gradually  relapsed,  and  it  v/as 
plain  that  her  release  could  not  be  distant. 
She  herself  seemed   to   long  for   it,  and   fre- 


2S6  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN. 

quently  repeated,  'Come,  Lord  JeSiis,  come 
quickly.'  She  asked  if  tiie  doctors  would  not 
know  by  her  pulse  how  long  she  was  likely  to 
last,  and  said  to  Mrs.  Reade,  when  they  were 
together  alone,  '  Now  think  if  there  is  any- 
thing else  you  would  like  to  say  or  to  ask  ;  for 
my  time  is  very  short.'  Mrs.  R.  replied,  '  You 
seem  very  anxious  to  be  gone.'  '  Yes,'  was 
the  answer,  '  the  sooner  the  better  now,  for  me 
and  for  you  too ;  but  I  must  be  patient.'  She 
then  said,  '  Dearest  H.,  you  will  never  forget 
all  I  have  said  to  you.  I  sometimes  fear  I 
have  not  said  enough  to  you  all ;  but  I  commit 
you  to  the  Saviour.'  Mrs.  R.  said,  'I  am  sure 
it  rests  with  ourselves  if  we  have  not  benefited 
as  we  ought.'  She  replied,  '  That's  gratify- 
ing,'— and  after  a  few  more  remarks,  ended 
at  that  time  by  embracing  her  affectionately, 
and  with  great  earnestness  and  solemnity 
gave  her  the  final  blessing.  She  then  desired 
Mrs.  R.  to  bring  her  little  boy,  James  Reade, 
that  he  might  also  receive  her  parting  blessing, 
and  she  took  leave  of  him  in  a  most  affection- 
ate manner.     • 

"  On  the  evening  of  the  20th  she  took  an  af- 
fectionate  leave  of  lier  eldest   and    youngest 


LIFE    OP    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  287 

sons.  She  thanked  my  eldest  brother  for  all 
his  kindness  to  her,  particularizing  sonie  of  her 
obligations  to  him,  and  then  she  gave  each  of 
them  her  last  blessing,  adding,  '  I  hope  to  meet 
you  all  at  the  right  hand  of  the  Judge.'  After 
midnight  she  desired  that  I  should  endeavor  to 
procure  some  rest,  and  as  her  attendants  prom- 
ised to  come  for  me  if  Lady  Colquhoun  be- 
came worse,  I  complied,  the  more  readily  as 
the  violence  of  her  sufferings  had  now  consid- 
erably abated.  Towards  morning  she  showed 
her  usual  consideration  for  those  around  her. 
A  maid-servant  had  sat  up  to  relieve  one  of 
her  regular  attendants  ;  and  when  she  was 
leaving  the  room,  though  articulation  was  now 
very  difficult,  she  said,  'Remember,  M.,  you 
must  not  go  to  your  work  as  usual  to-day.' 
That  morning,  the  21st,  I  found  her  quiet,  and 
apparently  free  from  pain,  though  evidently 
going  home.  Her  eyes  were  closed,  but  she 
was  not  asleep ;  for  when  I  spoke  she  threw 
her  arms  round  my  neck  and  kissed  me  affec- 
tionately. It  was  a  mother's  last  embrace. 
She  then  said  to  me,  '  My  Sarah,  I  have  not 
given  you  my  blessing.  I  pray  that  God  may 
bless  you  with  all  spiritual  blessings  in  heaven- 


28S  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

\y  places  in  Chikt  Jesus.'    By  and  by  she  said, 
'  I  wish  none  to  be  with  me  but  my  family.' 
My  sister  and  I  Ivnew  that  this  was  in  allusion 
to  her  last  moments.     She   again  asked  to  see 
her  httle  grandson,  James  Reade  ;  but  when  he 
was  brought  the  shades  of  death  had  obscured 
her  sight.   She  said, '  Where  is  iie  ?  I  cannot  see 
him.'     Mrs.  R.  put  his  hand  within  hers,  and 
she  grasped  it  firmly,  her  lips  moving  as  if  in 
prayer.     Mrs.  R.  and  I  sat  down  by  her  bed- 
side, and  after  a  short  interval    I  said  to  her, 
^  We  shall  meet  in  heaven.'     She  returned  no 
answer,  nor  could  I  be  sure  that  she  heard  me. 
1  then  said,  'And  Jesus  is  w^ith  you  now.'    She 
turned  her  head  round  to  me,  and  made  an  ef- 
fort to  reply,  and  by  the  expression  of  her  coun- 
tenance I  am  quite  certain  that  she  understood 
me.     She  spoke  no  more,  and  seemed  as  in  a 
soft  sleep.     She  faintly  acquiesced  when  Mrs. 
Reade  asked  if  she  w^ould  like  to  see  Mr.  Stew- 
art,  in  wdiose  visits    she   had    taken   peculiar 
pleasure.     She  was  quite  unable  to   speak  to 
him  when  he  arrived,  but  assented  when  asked 
if  he  should  pray.     We  kneeled  down,  and  in 
a  most  solemn  and  impressive  prayer  Mr.  S. 
commended   her  soul  to  God.     yVfter  this  she 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  289 

lingered,  os  if  in  a  peaceful  slumber,  until  three 
o'clock  in  the  afternoon,  when,  without  a  strug- 
gle, a  groan,  or  sigh,  her  willing  spirit  took  its 
flight  to  those  glorious  realms  for  which  slie 
had  longed  so  ardently.  But  so  gentle,  so  im- 
perceptible was  her  release,  that  for  some  time 
we  could  scarcely  believe  she  was  really  gone. 
^She  was  not,  for  God  took  her;'  and  after 
death  her  countenance  retained  the  peaceful, 
tranquil  look  it  had  worn  when  living." 

It  was  on  Wednesday,  October  21, 1846,  that 
her  shining  path  thus  merged  in  perfect  day. 
And  on  the  following  Saturday  another  pilgri- 
mage ended.  Mrs.  Graham  only  outlived  by 
three  days  that  kind  and  grateful  mistress  who 
had  provided  with  every  comfort  her  years  of 
infirmity  and  decay.  On  Tuesday  the  27th  the 
chapel,  which  ten  years  before  had  received  the 
remains  of  lier  husband,  opened  for  the  coffin 
of  Lady  Colquhoun.  In  compliance  with  her 
own  request,  she  still  wore  her  wedding-ring 
and  a  mourninj?  rinof  containinsr  Sir  James's 
hair.  The  funeral  was  private,  but  a  few  of  the 
people  in  the  neighborhood  sought  and  received 
permission  to  be  present.  Mr.  N.  Stewart  con- 
ducted the  usual  service  before  the  precious  re- 
25 


290  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

mains  were  carried  forth  to  the  place  of  sepul- 
ture. It  was  exactly  four  weeks  that  day  when 
last  she  looked  on  the  tints  of  autumn.  The 
copses  were  russet  then,  and  the  noble  trees 
around  the  mansion  wore  their  final  drapery 
of  scarlet,  and  brown,  and  gold,  a  sight  which 
she  used  wonderfully  to  admire.  But  by  the 
time  the  withered  leaves  were  drifting  into  her 
grave,  she  needed  not  to  mind  that  it  was  winter 
in  the  earth  ;  for,  instead  of  the  roughening  lake 
and  the  searing  forest,  God  had  showed  her 
"  the  pure  river,  clear  as  crystal,"  and  "  the  tree 
of  life,  yielding  fruit  every  month,"  and  whose 
leaves  "  heal  the  nations  :"  and,  better  still,  she 
had  found  her  life-long  wish ;  she  "  served  God 
and  saw  his  face." 

On  the  following  Sabbath  her  funeral  sermon 
was  preached  from  Heb.  vi.  12,  in  the  Free 
Church  of  Luss,  by  her  much- valued  friend  and 
minister,  the  Rev.  Neil  Stewart,  and  in  the 
parish  church  an  appropriate  and  impressive 
sermon  was  delivered  from  John  xiv.  27,  by  the 
Rev.  Robert  Wright.  And  when  the  various 
religious  societies  and  charitable  institutions 
with  which  she  had  been  connected  held  their 


LIFE    OP    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  291 

next  meetings,  they  placed  on  record  tbeir  fer 
vent  tributes  of  aflectioii  and  esteem.* 

*  III  the  "  Thirty -sixth  Annual  Report  of  the  Gaehc  Scliool 
Society,"  appeared  the  following  just  and  discriniiuating  no- 
tice,  which  we  have  much  satisfaction  in  transferring  to  these 
pages : — 

"  Before  passing  from  what  refers  to  the  Ladies'  Associa- 
tion, your  Committee  lament  to  say,  that  in  common  with  all 
the  friends  of  religion  in  this  land,  they  have,  in  the  death 
of  Lady  Colquhoun,  to  mourn  over  the  removal  from  among 
them  of  one  who  formed  a  distinguished  member  of  Christ's 
Church  upon  earth, — one  who  adorned  the  profession  of 
Cliristianity,  and  who  formed  an  invaluable  friend  of  the 
Gaelic  School  Society,  as  Treasurer  of  the  Ladies'  Association, 
and  one  of  the  Society's  Vice-Patronesses.  The  Committee 
have  a  melanclioly  satisfaction  in  transferring  to  these  pages 
the  mmute  wliich  they  have  recorded  elsewhere,  on  this  af 
fecting  event  in  the  history  of  the  past  year, — with  the  senti 
ments  expressed  m  which,  they  feel  assured,  all  the  friends 
of  the  Society  will  heartily  sympathize  : — 

" '  It  is  with  deep  concern  and  solemnity  of  feeling  that  the 
Committee  have  now  to  record  the  death  of  Lady  Colquhoun, 
of  Luss,  who  for  several  years  has  acted  as  Treasurer  to  the 
Ladies'  Auxiliary  Association  in  connection  with  this  Society. 
They  are  deeply  sensible  that  the  event  is  felt  by  tlie  religious 
world  to  be  a  public  loss.  Tlie  influence  of  Lady  Colqulioun's 
holy  and  consistent  hfc;  the  character  of  her  writings,  uniting 
spirituality  of  tone,  and  faithfulness  in  sentiment,  with  mental 
acuteness  and  elegance  of  diction;  the  munificence  of  her 
offerings  to  the  cause  of  Christ,  which  was  ever  dear  to  her ; 


292  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

Tall  and  dignified,  with  an  ample  and  intel- 
lectual forehead,  and  with    beautiful  Grecian 

and,  above  all,  the  efficacy  of  her  fervent  prayers,  combined 
to  render  her  at  once  the  ornament  of  her  numerous  circle  of 
friends,  and  an  esteemed  and  truly  valuable  member  of  the 
Church  of  Christ.  The  i-emoval  of  one  who,  in  the  providence 
and  by  the  grace  of  God,  occupied  such  a  position,  especially 
at  such  a  time,  is  an  occurrence  which  cannot  fail  solemnly 
to  affect  the  minds  of  all  who  are  concerned  for  the  cause  of 
truth. 

"  '  But  the  Committee  feel  that  their  province  is  specially 
to  regard  thi§  event  in  its  bearing  on  the  Gaelic  School  So- 
ciety. It  is  with  melancholy  interest  they  record  the  lively 
and  affectionate  concern  uniformly  evmced  by  Lady  Colqu- 
boun  for  the  prosperity  of  this  Institution.  In  its  tunes  of 
difficidty  and  trial  she  was  its  faithful,  zealous,  self-denying, 
devoted  friend.  When  it  pleased  the  Lord  to  vouchsafe  to 
its  efforts  any  marked  tokens  of  his  countenance  and  bless- 
ing, such  tidings  were  ever  to  her  the  occasion  of  humble 
gratitude  and  praise.  Tlie  Society  received  largely  of  her 
bounty,  and  no  doubt  was  often  the  subject  of  her  prayers. 
Reflecting  on  the  high  place  which  she  was  enabled  to  oc- 
cupy, the  Committee  feel  that  in  her  removal  by  the  hand 
of  Providence,  one  of  their  chief  earthly  props  has  been  taken 
away. 

" '  But  it  is  the  Lord's  hand  which  has  smitten.  He  is 
teaching  by  tliis  event  to  "cease  from  man,'"  and  to  look  with 
undivided  reliance  to  his  grace  and  power.  He  will  graciously 
maintain  liis  own  cjiuse,  and  command  the  light  to  shine  even 
out   of   darkness.     The    Couunittee  would,  therefore,  while 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  293 

features,  liglited  up  by  a  fine  complexion  and 
an  eye  mildly  penetrating,  there  was  something 

feeling  the  stroke,  desii-e  to  go  on  with  their  humble  labors, 
encouraging  themselves  in  the  Lord.  In  the  meantime,  they 
would  take  comfort  in  reflecting  on  the  well-grounded  hope 
wliich  they  are  warranted  to  cherish  regarding  their  valued 
and  lamented  friend.  And  while  they  pray  that  this  solemn 
event  may  be  sanctified  to  themselves  and  to  all  who  knew  the 
Christian  worth  and  zeal  of  Lady  Colqiohoun,  they  fervently 
trust  that  the  Lord  will  be  pleased  specially  to  bless  it  to  her 
sorrowing  family  and  relatives.  To  them  the  bereavement 
is,  humanly  speaking,  irreparable.  But  their  sorrow  may  well 
be  turned  into  joy,  for  it  is  written,  "  Blessed  are  the  dead 
which  die  in  the  Lord,  from  henceforth :  yea,  saith  the  Spirit, 
that  they  may  rest  from  their  labors ;  and  their  works  do 
foUow  them." ' " 

The  same  event  was  thus  noticed  in  the  Report  on  Female 
Education  in  India  : — 

"  During  the  past  year,  not  a  few  of  those  who  once  were 
distinguished  associates  with  us  in  this  great  enterprise,  whose 
tenderest  sympatliies  were  long  ago  aroused  for  the  manifold 
sorrows  of  the  daughters  of  India,  and  whose  delight  it  was 
to  devise  and  to  prosecute  plans  which  should  ensure  their 
complete  and  final  redemption  from  all  their  woes,  have 
ceased  to  be  engaged  in  such  occupations  on  earth.  Lady 
Colquhoun,  of  Luss,  one  of  your  Society's  earhest  and  most 
highly-valued  friends,  with  whose  enlightened  Christian 
cotmsels  and  prevailing  intercessions  it  was  for  long  so  emi- 
nently fovored  ;  and  Major  John  St.  Clair  Jameson,  of  Bombay, 
whose  honored  name  is  associated  in  the  minds  of  so  many  in 

25* 


294  LIFE    OP    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

peculiarly  prepossessing  in  the  youthful  appear- 
ance of  Lady  Colquhoun.     A  total  absence  of 

this  country,  Avith  their  first  feelings  of  commiseration  for 
the  fate  of  their  afflicted  sisters  in  the  East,  as  well  as  other 
less  distinguished,  but  not  less  devoted  friends  of  the  cause, 
have  witliin  the  last  few  months  rested  from  then*  labors  and 
entered  upon  their  reward. 

"  Regarding  the  elevated  character  of  the  late  lamented 
Patroness  (Lady  Colquhoun),  the  Committee  feel  that  it  would 
be  superfluous  now  to  remark.  The  distinguished  gifts  she 
possessed,  which  all  were  consecrated  to  the  noblest  and  best 
of  purposes  ;  her  matured  graces,  which  served  so  eminently 
to  adorn  the  doctrine  of  her  God  and  Saviour, — these  were 
well  known  and  appreciated  in  the  Chm'ches  wliile  she  was 
yet  here,  and  will  long  be  cherished  in  the  fond  remembrance 
of  many,  now  that  she  is  gone.  But  tlie  Committee  are 
assured  that  the  following  brief  extract  from  the  last  letter 
"written  to  your  agent  at  Calcutta  by  their  revered  departed 
friend,  indicating,  as  it  does,  the  views  and  feehngs  she  enter- 
tained regarding  India  dm'ing  her  last  days  on  earth,  will  be 
regarded  as  possessmg  pecuhar  interest  by  all  the  members 
of  the  Societ}'' : — 

" '  I  would  wish  to  encourage  the  hope  that  there  is  a 
blessing  in  store  for  India.  The  windows  of  heaven  seem 
opening ;  put  in  your  claim  for  a  share  of  the  refreshing 
shower.  Hope  on  !  Wait  on  !  Urge  and  work  on  !  After 
toil,  rest  is  sweet ;  and  the  rest  that  remains  for  the  people 
of  God  w^ill  be  most  welcome  to  those  who  have  borne  the 
burden  and  heat  of  the  day.'  " 

To  which  must  be  added  an  extract  from  the  Sixth  Ad- 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUIIOUN.  295 

affectation  superadded  the  perfecting  charm  of 
a  sweet  unconsciousness.  Her  elevated  mind 
and  graceful  manners  were  instinct  with  femi- 
nine refinement  and  inherent  nobility ;  and 
though  in  later  years  her  complexion  had  faded 
and  her  figure  stooped,  there  came  the  more 
brightly  forth  the  reassuring  gentleness,  the 
delicate  consideration,  and  the  tact  in  diffusing 
happiness,  which  are  among  the  loveliest  at- 
tributes of  the  Christian  lady. 

The  basis  of  her  natural  goodness  was 
truth.  Even  before  it  was  hallowed  into  "  godly 
sincerity,"  her  disposition  was  unusually  open 
and  candid ;  and  after  she  had  learned  to  live 

dress  of  the  Ladies'  Society  in  Scotland  in  Aid  of  the  Ilome 
Mission  of  the  Presbyterian  Chui-ch  in  Ireland : — 

"  We  cannot  close  this  Report  without  alluding  to  the  loss 
which  our  Society  has  sustained  in  the  removal,  by  death,  of 
its  much-respected  Patroness,  Lady  Colquhoun.  To  her  this 
Society  chiefly  owed  it3  origin.  Li  her  death,  the  cause  of 
the  Home  Mssion  may  be  said  to  have  lost,  in  Scotland,  its 
oldest  and  most  influential  friend.  Besides  defraying  the 
College  expenses  of  one  of  the  converts  now  training  for  the 
ministry  (Mr.  Kugan),  she  ever  contributed  readily  with  her 
means  to  the  numerous  demands  of  the  Mission  in  other  ways. 
The  want  of  her  generous  support  and  Christian  counsel  in 
the  management  of  this  Society  will  be  long  and  deeply 
felt."  <fcc.  cfec 


296  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ,UHOUN. 

in  the  recollection, — "  Thou,  God,  seest  me," 
she  became  studiously  exact  and  scrupulous. 
It  was  not  only  that  she  forbade  her  servants 
to  use  the  fashionable  equivocation,  '-Not  at 
home,"  but  all  her  intercourse  and  correspond- 
ence were  pervaded  by  a  most  rigid  adherence 
to  the  rule  of  "Yea,  yea^  and  Nay,  nay." 
And  this  elaborate  truthfulness  reacted  on  all 
her  character.  It  materially  promoted  her 
self-knowledge,  and  contributed  to  her  growth 
m  grace.  And  the  blessed  consciousness  that 
she  had  never  wilfully  flattered  or  maligned, 
enabled  her  to  mingle  in  all  society  w^ith  a 
cheerful  security  and  a  good- will  as  obvious  as 
it  was  genuine.  Nor  was  she  "  afraid  of  evil 
tidings.  Her  heart  was  fixed,  trusting  in  the 
Lord." 

The  steps  by  which  she  was  brought  to  the 
knowledge  of  the  Saviour,  have  been  traced  in 
the  foregoing  pages  ;  but  as  a  brief  review  of 
her  religious  experience,  and  as  an  expression 
of  her  matured  feelings  and  sentiments  very 
near  the  close  of  life,  we  are  sure  the  reader 
will  peruse  with  interest  the  following  letter. 
It  was  addressed  to  a  faithful  minister  in  the 
Highlands,   towards    the    erection    of    whose 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQ.UHOUN  297 

church  she  had  pieviously  contributed,  and  is 
dated  Oct.  28,  1845  :— 

"  My  dear  Sir, — I  know  not  how  to  refuse 
the  request  made  in  your  letter,  which  I  re- 
ceived a  short  time  since ;  and  yet  I  am  as- 
sured nothing  but  misconception  on  your  part 
could  have  induced  you  to  make  it.  I  am  to 
tell  you  'my  sentiments  and  feelings  when 
Jehovah  causes  the  light  of  his  face  to  shine 
on  me.'  Alas  !  alas  !  how  rare  is  this !  And 
I  am  to  say  what  are  my  'views  and  feelings 
when,  in  chastisement,  His  face  is  hid.'  Here, 
also,  I  am  at  fault ;  for  I  know  little  of  the 
heights  and  depths  to  which  so  many  of  God's 
people  are  subjected.  I  have  been  led  in  green 
pastures,  and  beside  the  still  waters.  One 
thing  I  have  learned,  and  from  the  bottom  of 
my  heart  I  feel  it, — my  utter  nothingness. 
But  do  not  think  my  speaking  thus  is  the  sign 
of  deep  humility.  Ah !  no.  I  am  sensible 
you  will  not  think  the  worse  of  me  for  saying 
so.  I  fear  to  write  of  myself, — I  cannot,  with- 
out sin.  I  may  write,  then,  of  my  Saviour; 
there  is  a  theme  upon  which  I  need  not  dread 
to  enlarge.     And  I  can  with  truth   say,  that 


298  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

each  step  in  my  journey  through  Ufe  leads  me, 
with  more  undivided  confidence,  to  rest  on 
Him  alone,  without  reference  to  anything  else 
but  His  finished  work. 

" '  Nothing  in  my  hand  I  bring, 
Simply  to  thy  cross  I  cling ; 
Naked,  come  to  thee  for  di-ess  ; 
Helpless,  look  to  thee  for  grace ; 
Foul,  I  to  the  Fountain  fly ; 
Wash  me.  Saviour !  or  I  die.' 

"  I  have  been  led  very  gradually  and  gently 
in  the  divine  life.  I  never  knew  the  pangs  of 
the  new  birth ;  and  at  first  had  slight  views  of 
the  depravity  of  the  heart,  or  of  the  need  of 
salvation  by  Christ.  These  things  were  more 
articles  of  my  creed  than  the  conviction  of  the 
soul.  I  believed  them  chiefly  because  the  Bible 
told  me  they  were  true.  But  years  have 
supervened,  and  proof  that  the  heart  is  deceit- 
ful above  all  things  and  desperately  wricked 
has  not  been  awanting ;  and  hence,  if  saved  at 
all,  I  now  feel  it  must  be  by  grace  through 
faith.  One  thing,  I  believe,  is  rather  singular 
in  my  experience, — that  I  was  more  induced 
to  devote  myself  to  God  by  the  beauty  of  the 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLQUIIOUN.  299 

Divine  character,  and  the  lovely  precepts  of  tlie 
Gospel,  than  by  any  other  consideration.  And 
still,  when  I  can  get  but  a  ghmpse  of  these 
things  in  anything  like  their  transcendent 
glory,  my  heart  is  fixed.  But  I  dare  not  go  on 
in  this  strain.  I  am  much  afraid  you  will 
think  me  very  different  from  what  I  am.  I 
have  wandered  from  my  subject.  I  was  going 
to  write  of  the  Saviour.  I  think,  then,  the 
Apostle  Peter  is  very  happy  in  the  expression 
when  he  calls  him  '■  precious.'  What  so  pre- 
cious as  that  which  we  cannot  have  a  moment's 
peace  without  ?  What  so  precious  as  that  in 
which  perfection  dwells, — where  beauty  alone 
shines?  Or,  what  is  of  equal  value  to  us  with 
the  God-man,  who  saves  us  from  everlasting 
perdition,  and  makes  us  '  partakers  of  His 
holiness  V  These  are  common-place  and  well- 
known  truths ;  but  we  need  to  be  reminded  of 
them ;  and,  ah !  how  slightly  are  they  im- 
pressed upon  the  heart !  Yet  still — still  we 
must  say,  however  listlessly  and  feebly,  Christ 
is  precious !  Many,  I  Jcnow,  say  it  with  more 
devout  affections  than  I  can  do.  But  say  so  I 
must  and  will,  as  He  Himself  shall  enable  me. 
He  must  take  my  heart ;  I  cannot  give  it  Him. 


300  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLdUHOUN. 

You,  111}^  dear  Sir,  have  a  high  honor  assigned 
to  you  in  having  the  everlasting  Gospel  to 
preach.  Let  not  your  hands  hang  down  ;  you 
have  a  noble  cause,  a  good  Master,  and  assur- 
ance of  some  measure,  at  least,  of  success.  I 
believe  ministers  are  often  little  aware  of  the 
effect  of  their  preaching,  I  knew  a  man  of 
God,  now  in  his  grave,  or  rather,  I  should  say, 
now  before  the  throne,  (Dr.  Buchanan,  of  the 
Canongate,)  who  told  me  that  he  had  just 
heard  of  one  who  had  died  in  the  Lord,  and 
mentioned,  on  his  death-bed,  that  Dr.  B.'s 
preaching  had  been  the  means  of  his  conversion 
twenty  years  before  ;  and  all  that  time  he  was 
ignorant  of  the  circumstance.  When  very 
young,  Dr.  B.  was  of  great  use  to  myself;  but 
I  dared  not  have  told  him  so  for  long  after.  I 
have  now,  as  far  as  I  know  it,  and  according  to 
my  ability,  complied  with  your  request.  May 
not  I,  with  equal  reason,  expect  tliat  a  word 
from  you  will  benefit  me  ?  But  I  do  not  wish  to 
tax  you.  I  know  the  many  calls  you  must  have 
upon  your  time,  and  I,  too,  have  sometimes 
as  much  writing  as  I  can  well  accomplish." 

The  pervading  element  in  her  piety  was  an 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  301 

adoring  attachment  to  this  Divine  Redeemer. 
The  desire  to  see  his  cause  triumphant  in  the 
world  impelled  her  elTorts  in  the  many  Societies 
of  which  she  was  an  assiduous  member.  Re- 
gard for  his  honor  prompted  all  the  more  im- 
portant actions  of  her  later  life.  The  hope  of 
introducing  others  to  his  transforming  friend- 
ship made  her  personally  and  with  the  pen,  in 
books  and  in  conversation,  in  cottage  visits  and- 
in  exalted  society,  "  instant  in  season  and  out 
of  season."  And  the  belief  that  they  belonged 
to  the  Saviour  endeared  to  her  obscure  or  im- 
perfect Christians,  just  as  the  perception  of  ear- 
nestness in  his  service  drew  her  regard  towards 
ministers  of  ordinary  gifts,  and  made  her  a  do- 
cile or  delighted  listener  to  sermons  which 
would  have  been  reckoned  common-place  by 
hearers  more  fastidious  or  less  fervent.  And 
closely  allied  to  this  was  her  unusual  confidence 
in  prayer.  It  was  one  of  the  sisters  at  Bethany 
who  said  to  Jesus,  "  Lord,  if  thou  hadst  been 
here,  my  brother  had  not  died.  But  I  know, 
that  even,  whatsoever  thou  wilt  ask  of  God,  God 
will  give  it  thee."  And  the  subject  of  this  rec- 
ord had  a  confidence  in  the  Saviour's  grace  and 
power  akin  to  that  of  Martha,  and  for  a  similar 
26 


302  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

reason, — she  had  a  hke  affection.  In  every- 
thing, by  prayer  and  suppUcation,  she  made 
known  her  requests ;  and  her  diary  abounds 
in  notices  of  answered  prayer. 

''  Ye  are  the  hght  of  the  world."  The  be- 
hever  fuliils  his  exalted  function  when,  filled 
with  the  Divine  Spirit,  he  so  acts  that  in  his 
graciousness  men  are  reminded  of  the  grace 
of  God,  "  Let  it  shine,"  and  "let  it  so  shine 
that  men  may  see  your  good  works,  and  glo- 
rify your  Father  in  heaven."  The  piety  of 
Lady  Colquhoun  was  spontaneous,  effusive, 
evenly,  like  a  lamp  abundantly  replenished  ; 
and  its  bright  spirituality  at  once  reminded 
the  beholder  of  its  heavenly  Source.  And  we 
know  not  that  we  can  better  describe  what 
manner  of  person  she  was  in  this  respect,  than 
by  copying  the  words  of  her  own  minister,  and 
those  of  her  eldest  brother. 

"  It  has  been  my  privilege,"  says  the  Rev. 
Neil  Stewart,  "  to  converse  with  not  a  few  per- 
sons of  Christian  character ;  but  I  have  not 
received  the  same  pleasure  or  benefit  from  all. 
In  conversing  with  some,  I  have  felt  my  affec- 
tions restrained,  my  spirits  depressed,  and  a 
painful  feehng  of  discontent  predominating  in 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  303 

my  mind.  But  I  never  left  Lady  Colquhoun 
without  feeling  my  affections  purified,  my 
heart  warmed,  and  my  spirit  raised  in  humble 
thankfulness  to  God  for  his  goodness,  and  in 
earnest  desire  to  be  conformed  to  his  image, 
and  to  do  all  things  to  his  glory.  This,  I  am 
persuaded,  was  the  result  of  the  peculiar  char- 
acter of  her  piety,  which  was  alike  devoid  of 
that  asceticism  which  contracts  the  affections, 
and  that  enthusiasm  which  impairs  the  judg- 
ment. Like  one  of  her  favorite  authors,  John 
Howe,  she  dwelt  with  much  delight  on  the 
character  and  attributes  of  God  as  revealed  in 
the  face  of  Jesus  Christ,  and  by  the  habitual 
contemplation  of  them  it  seemed  as  if  she 
were  more  and  more  conformed  to  the  same 
image." 

And  to  his  niece,  Sir  George  Sinclair  writes  : 
"I  look  back  with  unfeigned  satisfaction  on 
all  my  personal  intercourse  with  my  beloved 
sister,  because  I  am  quite  certain  that  we 
never  exchanged  a  hasty  word,  and  never 
harbored  towards  each  other  an  unkind  feeling, 
even  for  a  single  moment.  Her  piety  was  en- 
tirely free  fron^  moroseness  or  gloom.  She 
was  never  highly  elevated,  and  never  unduly 


304  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLdUHO  LTN, 

depressed.  Though  al\va3's  dignified,  her 
manner  was  often  playful.  She  did  not  exact 
from  others  a  strict  and  undeviating  observ- 
ance of  the  rules  which  she  laid  down  for  her 
own  guidance,  and  though  uncompromising  as 
to  all  principles  of  grave  importance,  she  was 
always  inclined  to  the  side  of  lenity  and  in- 
dulgence when  she  differed  from  others  in 
matters  of  minor  moment.  You  are  aware 
with  w  hat  enthusiastic  strength  of  zeal  and 
conviction  she  espoused  the  interests  of  the 
Free  Church  ;  and  yet  she  always  discussed 
that  very  exciting  question  with  me  (who  had 
reluctantly,  but  conscientiously,  remained  con- 
nected with  the  Established  Church)  in  a 
spirit  of  charity  and  forbearance  w^hich  is 
much  more  frequently  enforced  than  exempli- 
fied. On  the  whole,  I  have  never  seen  any 
character  so  blameless  and  harmless  and  with- 
out rebuke  ;  so  free  from  infirmities,  and  so 
adorned  by  virtues.  She  lived  much  tvith  her 
Saviour  in  prayer,  which  is  the  surest  resource 
for  being  enabled  to  live  like  him  in  daily  con- 
versation." 

Thus  devoted  and  thus  endowed,  it  w^as  her 
blessedness  to  accomplish  much  for  that  Re- 


LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN.  305 

deemer  whom  she  loved  so  ardently  and  fol- 
lowed so  affectionately.  In  the  nearest  circle 
of  her  kindred,  in  her  own  household,  amongst 
her  younger  and  older  neighbors,  to  the  poor  of 
other  places,  to  casual  visitors,  she  was  the 
source  of  incalculable  benefits.  Irrespective  of 
her  munificent  contributions  and  unwearying 
exertions  in  the  cause  of  Christian  Philan- 
thropy, the  friends  of  the  Gospel  felt  a  perpet- 
ual solace  in  her  presence,  and  were  comforted 
to  think  that  in  the  most  polished  society  was 
exhibited  such  a  specimen  of  pure  and  consist- 
ent piety.  Her  light  shone  to  the  last,  and 
was  brightest  at  the  end ;  and  her  Father  in 
heaven  was  glorified. 

Like  Hannah  and  Jessie  Sinclair,  we  invite 
our  younger  readers  to  choose  "  that  better 
part,  which  shall  not  be  taken  from  them  ;" 
assuring  them  that,  if  at  the  foot  of  the  Cross 
they  lay  down  some  things  that  are  brilliant, 
they  will  there  obtain  in  return  all  that  is 
beautiful.  When  these  happy  sisters  found  the 
Saviour  they  did  not  lose  their  taste  for  intel- 
lectual enjoyments,  nor  their  zeal  for  personal 
improvement ;  but  they  found  a  Friend  all-wise 
and  ever  present,  who  in  scenes  of  anxiety  kept 
26* 


306  LIFE    OF    LADY    COLaUHOUN. 

them  calm  and  recollected,  and  in  the  midst  of 
flattery  preserved  them  sober-minded ;  and 
who,  along  with  the  forgiveness  of  sin,  im- 
parted to  their  character  a  depth  and  a  delicacy 
which  cannot  be  derived  from  courtly  rules  or 
the  most  careful  up-bringing.  In  their  paral- 
lel history  is  seen  how  gracefully  with  feminine 
refinement  may  be  combined  homely  duties  and 
labors  of  practical  beneficence ;  and  it  pro- 
claims once  more  how  essential  to  eminent 
piety  are  self-knowledge,  watchfulness,  and 
prayer.  And  surely  in  the  blessed  confidence 
that  through  His  interposition  lives  so  lovely 
have  been  once  more  united,  we  have  another 
reason  for  loving  and  adoring  that  Redeemer 
who  has  already  transferred  so  much  of  earth 
to  heaven. 

They  have  been  brought  "with  gladness  great, 

And  mirth  on  ev'ry  side, 
Into  the  palace  of  the  King, 

And  there  they  shall  abide. 


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Haldane's  Exposition  of  Romans.     8vo.  2  50 

Hamilton's  Life  in  Earnest — Mount  of  Olives — Harp  on 
the   Willov^^s— Thankfuluess— and    Life    of    Bishop 

Hall,  each  30 

•Hamilton — The  Happy  Home.     With  12  illustrations 

by  Hov^'land.     ISmo.  50 

Hawker's  Poor  Man's  Morning  Portion.     12rao.  60 

"            Evening  Portion.         "  60 

Zion's  Pilgrim.     ISmo.  30 

Hervey's  Meditations         "  40 

Hetherington's  History  of  the  Church  of  Scotland  1  50 

Henry's  (Matlh.)  Method  for  Prayer  40 

Communicant's  Companion.     ISmo.  40 

■'         Daily  Communion  with  God.         "  30 

Pleasantness  of  a  Religious  Life.    "  30 

Choice  Works.     12mo.  60 

*Henry,  Philip,  Life  of.     ISmo.  50 

Hill's  (George)  Lectures  on  Divinity.     8vo.  2  GO 

(Rowland)  Life.     By  Sidney.     12mo.  75 

♦History  of  the  Puritans  in  England,  and  the  Pilgrim 

Fathers,  by  the  Rev.  W.  H.  Stowell  and  D.  Wilson, 

F.S.A.,  with  two  steel  plates.  I2mo.  1  00 

History  of  the  Reformation  in  Europe.     ISmo.  40 

Housman's  Life  and  Remains.     12mo.  7o 

Home's  Introduction.     2  vols,  royal  8vo.  half  cloth  3  50 

Do.     do.     1  vol.  sheep  4  QO 

Do.     do.     2  vols,  cloth  4  00 

— —  Do.     do.     2  vols,  library  style  5  00 

— —  Bishop,  Commentary  on  the  Book  of  Psalms  1  50 

Howell's  Life — Perfect  Peace.     ISmo.  30 


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